Few things cause as much stress, anxiety and fear as the process of divorce. Much of that comes from the "not knowing" piece of the process and on this episode of Divorce Curious, my goal is to fill in as many blanks for you as possible about what to expect from the process with the expert guidance of Indiana-based family law attorney, and proud mom of 7, Portland Schnitzius.

This isn't just your standard list of do's and don'ts, but a heartfelt and well intentioned conversation to give you a real taste of what to expect if you're considering getting a divorce and how you can best prepare yourself for what may lie ahead in the process for you.

Key themes in this episode include financial control and recognizing emotional abuse in your marriage.

There was so much great info that came during my conversation with Portland that this will be shared in a Part 1/Part 2 style so make sure you listen to both episodes so you can soak in all of Portland's wisdom. You don't want to miss any of this important conversation, I promise you that!

*disclaimer: Portland practices in Indiana so this guidance is through her experience with the family law guidelines in that state. This is not specific legal advice, so please consult with your own attorney for next steps and guidance in your specific situation.

Key Takeaways:

• Divorce can be a complex and emotional journey, you don't want to try to navigate it on your own.
• Understanding financial control and abuse is crucial for those in toxic relationships.
• Social media has played a significant role in raising awareness about unhealthy relationships.
• Many individuals feel empowered to seek divorce after recognizing their situation is not normal.
• The legal landscape of divorce includes both assets and debts, regardless of whose name they are in.
• Financial independence is essential for anyone considering divorce.
• The emotional toll of divorce can be mitigated by gathering information and resources.
• Women often report wishing they had divorced sooner after the process is complete.
• The level of conflict in divorces has increased since COVID-19.
• Therapists and legal professionals are increasingly recognizing patterns of emotional abuse.

About Portland:

Portland Schnitzius is an attorney licensed in the State of Indiana since 1993. She has been practicing family law for over a decade in areas such as divorces, paternity cases (contested matters between never married parents), adoptions, child custody/parenting time disputes, co-parenting disputes, guardianships and child support. She is a graduate of Indiana University McKinney school of Law in Indianapolis, Indiana and her office is located in a suburb of Indianapolis – Fishers Indiana. She is an Indiana Supreme Court registered domestic mediator, a Guardian Ad Litem, a Parenting Coordinator serving high conflict co-parents, and is trained in collaborative divorce. She enjoys volunteer work with Kids Voice of Indiana serving as an advocate for children and youth in the family court system.

She was born and raised in Southern California and graduat

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TEXT ME! Let me know what you think of this episode or what topics you would like to see covered next!

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There are some people that you meet in your life and just know instantly that you're going to be friends with for a very long time. For me, one of those people is Kara Kavensky.

I've watched Kara go through the worst things that a person should have to endure, including a traumatic marriage, and subsequent divorce, from an abusive narcissist and the tragic loss of her son. And the most incredible thing about her, is that she moves through all of the devastating pain with a beautiful open heart and a passion for telling stories of hope and love.

And joy.

Finding Joy to be more specific.

Kara captures much of her journey in her upcoming memoir, Finding Joy, where she shares her awakening moment, the impact of witnessing a beautiful love story between Bob and Joy, and how it inspired her to find courage in her own life.

We talk about the importance of healing before entering new relationships, the challenges of divorce, and the significance of self-love and seeking out positive examples of things you most desire to have in your own life.

Takeaways

• Kara's awakening moment occurred during her third pregnancy, realizing she was in an abusive relationship with a dangerous narcissist.
• Therapy and energy modalities helped Kara cope and heal during her marriage.
• Bob and Joy's love story became a beacon of hope for Kara during her darkest times.
• Kara emphasizes the importance of healing before entering new relationships.
• Divorce is a challenging process, and seeking professional help is crucial.
• Self-love and positive examples are essential for personal growth.
• Kara's memoir aims to inspire others to believe in love after hardship.
• Collecting evidence of positive relationships can empower individuals.
• It's important to set boundaries and prioritize mental health during difficult times.

No one person should have to endure the pain that my friend Kara has. It's just not fair. Even so, Kara has chosen to live a fully authentic life, out loud and proudly sharing her story, and help be a source of light and that beacon of hope that so many of us can use right now.

Listen, be inspired, and then share this episode with someone in your life that needs this positive evidence of the possibility of finding the love you desire, even against all of the odds.

Connect with Kara directly and follow her work at:

https://www.karakavensky.com/

TEXT ME! Let me know what you think of this episode or what topics you would like to see covered next!

Check out this link for all the ways we can connect:
https://stan.store/LisaMitchell

Join the 60K+ other people who follow Divorce-Curious on TikTok:
https://www.tiktok.com/@divorcecuriouspodcast

Stay up-to-date at the Divorce-Curious website at:
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