Epic Exits : Departing with Flair, Sarcasm, and Possibly a Squirrel

Welcome to the ultimate guide to leaving your job in a blaze of surreal, side-splitting, and slightly unhinged glory. Whether you’re suffering from "Can You Just" fatigue, a boss who schedules meetings over lunch, or an IT Steve who was clearly destined for jousting greatness, this book is your passport to escaping corporate madness with style, flair, and possibly a papier-mâché cow head.

Inside these pages, you’ll find:
Masterful exit strategies (including sumo-wedgie philosophy, doughnut crime scenes, and the unstoppable power of a well-timed resignation haiku).
Cinematic resignations that will leave HR reeling and your colleagues in awe.
Unhinged office truths that will make you scream “Oh my god, that’s MY workplace!”
A passive-aggressive email so perfectly crafted it deserves to be framed.
Resignation letter Templates for when words fail but you are done.

And don’t just take our word for it—see what the (completely real and definitely not made-up) critics are saying!

"This book made me laugh so hard I accidentally sent my resignation via GIF." – Brenda from Accounts

"A masterpiece. I read it during my lunch break and now I have a performance review scheduled." – Dave from HR

"I tried the ‘multi-tasking prosthetic arms’ bit in a meeting. I am now on a watchlist." – Steve from IT

"Never have I felt so seen, so heard, so deeply validated in my hatred for PowerPoint." – Karen (survived a scavenger hunt gone wrong)

"My flabbergasted has officially been gasted. 10/10." – A Former Corporate Prisoner

This isn’t just a book—it’s a battle cry, a coping mechanism, and a middle finger wrapped in a company-wide email.

Now, grab your stapler, finish your overdue-but-pointless report, and prepare for the Exit of a Lifetime.