Incontinent on the Continent
My Mother, Her Walker, and Our Grand Tour of Italy
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Narrated by:
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Eileen Barrett
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By:
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Jane Christmas
About this listen
In this travelogue of self-discovery, Jane Christmas brings her wickedly irreverent style to a new mother-daughter experience. Since the beginning of time, mothers and daughters have had notoriously fraught relationships. "Show me a mother who says she has a good or great relationship with her daughter," Jane Christmas writes, "and I'll show you a daughter who is in therapy trying to understand how it all went so horribly wrong."
To smooth over five decades of constant clashing, Christmas takes her arthritic, incontinent, and domineering mother, Valeria - a cross between Queen Victoria and Hyacinth Bucket of the British comedy Keeping Up Appearances - on a tour of Italy. Neither has been to Italy before, but both are fans of ancient art, architecture, and history. Will gazing at the fruits of the Italian Renaissance be enough to spark a renaissance in their relationship?
As they wander along the winding Amalfi Coast, traverse St. Peter's Square in Rome, and sample the wines of Tuscany - walkers, biscuits, shawls, and medications in tow - they revisit the bickering and bitterness of years past and reassess who they are and how they might reconcile their differences.
Unflinching and frequently hilarious, Incontinent on the Continent will speak to all women who have tried to make friends with their mothers.
©2011 Jane Christmas (P)2013 Post Hypnotic Press Inc.Listeners also enjoyed...
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By: Juliet Blackwell
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Mistletoe Murder
- A Lucy Stone Mystery, Book 1
- By: Leslie Meier
- Narrated by: Karen White
- Length: 6 hrs and 17 mins
- Unabridged
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As if baking holiday cookies, knitting a sweater for her husband, and making her daughter’s angel costume for the church pageant weren’t enough things for Lucy Stone’s busy Christmas schedule, she’s also working nights at the famous mail-order company Country Cousins. But when she discovers Sam Miller, its very wealthy founder, dead in his car from an apparent suicide, the sleuth in her knows something just doesn’t smell right.
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5 stars
- By Beatrice on 12-21-20
By: Leslie Meier
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Lost on Planet China
- By: J. Maarten Troost
- Narrated by: Simon Vance
- Length: 10 hrs and 48 mins
- Unabridged
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When the travel bug bit, J. Maarten Troost took on the world's most populous and intriguing nation. As Troost relates his gonzo adventure - dodging deadly drivers in Shanghai, eating yak in Tibet, deciphering restaurant menus (offering local favorites such as cattle penis with garlic), and visiting with Chairman Mao (still dead) - he reveals a vast, complex country on the brink of transformation that will soon shape the way we all work, live, and think.
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I love Troost but...
- By Abigail on 02-25-09
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Us: A Novel
- By: David Nicholls
- Narrated by: David Haig
- Length: 14 hrs and 9 mins
- Unabridged
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Douglas Petersen may be mild-mannered, but behind his reserve lies a sense of humor that seduces beautiful Connie into a second date...and eventually into marriage. Now, almost three decades later, they live more or less happily in the London suburbs with their moody seventeen year-old son, Albie. Then Connie tells him she thinks she wants a divorce. The timing couldn’t be worse. Connie has planned a month-long tour of European capitals, a chance to experience the world’s greatest works of art as a family, and she can’t bring herself to cancel. And maybe going ahead is for the best anyway? Douglas is privately convinced that this landmark trip will rekindle the romance in the marriage, and might even help him to bond with Albie. Narrated from Douglas’s endearingly honest, slyly witty, and at times achingly optimistic point of view, Us is the story of a man trying to rescue his relationship with the woman he loves, and learning how to get closer to a son who’s always felt like a stranger.
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Great novel - my favorite in years
- By Mark on 07-21-15
By: David Nicholls
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The UnAmericans
- Stories
- By: Molly Antopol
- Narrated by: Jennifer Van Dyck
- Length: 7 hrs and 47 mins
- Unabridged
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Again and again, Molly Antopol’s deeply sympathetic characters struggle for footing in an uncertain world, hounded by forces beyond their control. Their voices are intimate and powerful and they resonate with searing beauty. Antopol is a superb young talent, and The UnAmericans will long be remembered for its wit, humanity, and heart.
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Sensational stories! Brilliant new author.
- By MidwestGeek on 05-04-14
By: Molly Antopol
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By Book or by Crook
- Lighthouse Library Mystery Series # 1
- By: Eva Gates
- Narrated by: Elise Arsenault
- Length: 9 hrs and 24 mins
- Unabridged
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For 10 years Lucy has enjoyed her job poring over rare tomes of literature for the Harvard Library, but she has not enjoyed the demands of her family's social whorl or her sort-of engagement to the staid son of her father's law partner. But when her 10-year relationship implodes, Lucy realizes that the plot of her life is in need of a serious rewrite.
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A fun cozy with unfortunately bad narration
- By JJ on 01-14-16
By: Eva Gates
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Nightwatcher
- By: Wendy Corsi Staub
- Narrated by: Jay Snyder
- Length: 9 hrs and 40 mins
- Unabridged
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Nightwatcher, the first in a riveting new series, takes place in the days immediately following the 9/11 terrorist attacks. A serial killer is loose in New York City, and Allison Taylor may be the only one who can identify him. She doesn’t know the killer has now set his sights on her—and unless she acts fast, she’ll be his next victim.
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Nightwatcher!!!
- By barbara on 06-07-13
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Waking Up in Paris
- Overcoming Darkness in the City of Light
- By: Sonia Choquette
- Narrated by: Sonia Choquette
- Length: 8 hrs and 32 mins
- Unabridged
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Devastated by the unexpected end of her decades-long marriage, renowned spiritual teacher and intuitive guide Sonia Choquette undertook an equally unexpected move and relocated to Paris, the scene of many happy memories from her life as a student and young mother. Arriving in the aftermath of the Charlie Hebdo massacre, she found a Paris as traumatized by this unforeseen event as she had been by her divorce.
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I wanted to love this, but couldn't.
- By Bonnie Peterson on 10-02-18
By: Sonia Choquette
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The Paris Key
- By: Juliet Blackwell
- Narrated by: Xe Sands
- Length: 9 hrs and 57 mins
- Unabridged
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As a girl, Genevieve Martin spent the happiest summer of her life in Paris, learning the delicate art of locksmithing at her uncle's side. But since then, living back in the States, she has become more private, more subdued. She has been an observer of life rather than an active participant, holding herself back from those around her, including her soon-to-be ex-husband. Paris never really left Genevieve, and, as her marriage crumbles, she finds herself faced with an incredible opportunity.
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Not a cozy murder mystery but a cozy slice of life
- By sams on 10-23-15
By: Juliet Blackwell
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The Gem Thief
- By: Sian Ann Bessey
- Narrated by: Aubrey Warner
- Length: 8 hrs and 46 mins
- Unabridged
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As jewelry designer for one of the most prestigious jewelers in the world, Gracie Miller completed a particularly stunning piece: a custom setting for a large diamond. But when her billionaire client Mrs. Katsaros comes to have a minor issue with the setting repaired, Gracie is horrified to realize it is not the ring she created. Someone has forged her design, and the priceless diamond is gone. Mrs. Katsaros has no desire to bring media attention to the jewelry heist, so she recruits her nephew, Quinn, and his FBI agent friend, Steve, to do some sleuthing off the record.
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Good story, worth a listen.
- By V. Fortner on 08-01-21
By: Sian Ann Bessey
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Double Take
- By: Kevin Michael Connolly
- Narrated by: Kevin Michael Connolly
- Length: 4 hrs and 14 mins
- Unabridged
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Double take: a rapid or surprised second look, either literal or figurative, at a person or situation whose significance has not been completely grasped at first. Kevin Michael Connolly is a 23-year-old man who has seen the world in a way most of us never will. Whether swarmed by Japanese tourists at Epcot Center as a child or holding court at the X Games on his mono-ski, Kevin Connolly has been an object of curiosity since the day he was born without legs.
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Love this story so much
- By R. MCRACKAN on 07-04-18
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Iranian Rappers and Persian Porn
- A Hitchhiker's Adventures in the New Iran
- By: Jamie Maslin
- Narrated by: Stephen Hoye
- Length: 8 hrs and 58 mins
- Unabridged
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When Jamie Maslin decides to hitchhike the entire length of the Silk Road, he decides to travel first and plan later. Then, unexpectedly stranded in Iran - a country he's only read about in newspapers - he wonders whether he'll make it out alive. After crossing the border on foot from Turkey, Maslin finds himself suddenly plunged into the subversive, contradictory world of Iranian subculture, where he is embraced by locals who are happy to show him the true Iran as they see it....
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Entertaining & Informative
- By Bella Bates on 04-18-14
By: Jamie Maslin
What listeners say about Incontinent on the Continent
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Simone
- 04-17-14
Whiny Rant
This book was a disappointment. It wasn’t funny; it just came across as a whiny rant. Too bad because the subject matter had the potential to be very funny!
I also did not like the narrator – her Italian sounded Spanish.
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2 people found this helpful
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- Robert R.
- 06-18-13
Beyond Boring
Would you try another book from Jane Christmas and/or Eileen Barrett?
No, I don't think so.
What was most disappointing about Jane Christmas’s story?
It simply wasn't interesting, and the humor was literally the same thing, page after page, chapter after chapter, until it became annoying rather than pleasurable.
Would you be willing to try another one of Eileen Barrett’s performances?
The narrator was decent enough, it was the material she was given that was the issue.
What character would you cut from Incontinent on the Continent?
This just seems completely insincere, as if the author decided when she and her mother had decided on this trip that she'd take good notes and turn it into a book of some kind after in the hopes of making some money and paying for the trip. The problem is the author, her mother, and the people she meets just aren't interesting, their escapades aren't interesting, the humor isn't interesting or funny, and it's just the same thing over and over and over again, ad nauseum.
Any additional comments?
Avoid like the plague.
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2 people found this helpful
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- Dina M. Scungio
- 07-26-19
Depressing
As I was preparing to visit Italy for the trip of a lifetime, I started listening to Italian stories, this was depressing, whiny, complaining about Italians, made me not want to visit. I couldn’t even finish it! Waste of money!
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