Offa's Dyke Path Audiobook By Paul Amess cover art

Offa's Dyke Path

Lost in the Woods

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Offa's Dyke Path

By: Paul Amess
Narrated by: Virtual Voice
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About this listen

Join Paul and the gang as they stumble, bumble, and occasionally get lost across the border into deepest, darkest Wales. Armed with questionable decision-making and a serious lack of map-reading skills, they take on Offa's Dyke Path, heading from South to North, and braving whatever the weather (and the sheep) throw their way. Spoiler: It's a lot of rain and a lot of sheep.

The adventure kicks off in Chepstow, home to Wales' oldest castle (it’s impressive, but don’t worry, the guys will still find a way to mess it up). As they head north to Monmouth, they cross the only medieval bridge of its kind, only to discover that Geoffrey of Monmouth wasn’t called Geoffrey and definitely wasn’t from Monmouth. It’s all downhill from there—well, except when they climb the Brecon Beacons to Hay-on-Wye, a former independent kingdom, home to a notorious murderer, and just generally a place of utter madness.

From there, the gang somehow figures out their Kington from their Knighton (don’t ask), then plods on to Montgomery, where they do their best to learn some history, despite Rob’s excessive snoring. Their journey continues cross-country to Prestatyn, where the spectacular views of Welsh mountains, valleys, and plains do little to distract from the onslaught of sheep.

Along the way, they uncover ancient castles, madcap inventors, and the flying banana (what? It’s a thing, okay?), while brushing shoulders with ghostly dogs, haunted humans, and far too many sheep. Expect tales of murderers, Sherlock Holmes, admiral’s secrets, pop stars, and mysterious strangers with axes.

But what really keeps them going is their single-minded mission: to support the Welsh economy by trying to visit 177 pubs in 177 miles (they’re practically saving Wales, really). Along the way, they’ll attempt to answer important questions, like:

  • How did Napoleon save us from Hitler by being lazy?

  • Why do they love Booby Dingle so much?

  • And seriously, why are there so many murders in Wales?

Of course, there’s the dyke itself. Who built it? Why? When? Spoiler: The answers are much less dramatic than the boys would like.

And did we mention it rains a lot? And there are sheep? Because there are a LOT of sheep.

Grab your boots, brace yourself for the wettest walk of your life, and join the gang to find out how this utterly ridiculous journey unfolds.

Europe Historical Haunted Crime Murder
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