The Hilliker Curse
My Pursuit of Women
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Narrated by:
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James Ellroy
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By:
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James Ellroy
About this listen
The legendary crime writer gives us a raw, brutally candid memoir - as high intensity and as riveting as any of his novels - about his obsessive search for “atonement in women".
The year was 1958. Jean Hilliker had divorced her fast-buck hustler husband and resurrected her maiden name. Her son, James, was 10 years old. He hated and lusted after his mother and “summoned her dead". She was murdered three months later.
The Hilliker Curse is a predator’s confession, a treatise on guilt and on the power of malediction, and above all, a cri de cœur. James Ellroy unsparingly describes his shattered childhood, his delinquent teens, his writing life, his love affairs and marriages, his nervous breakdown, and the beginning of a relationship with an extraordinary woman who may just be the long-sought her. A layered narrative of time and place, emotion, and insight, sexuality and spiritual quest, The Hilliker Curse is a brilliant, soul-baring revelation of self. It is unlike any memoir you have ever listened to.
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Crank
- By: Ellen Hopkins
- Narrated by: Laura Flanagan
- Length: 4 hrs and 31 mins
- Unabridged
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Kristina Georgia Snow is the perfect daughter: gifted high school junior, quiet, never any trouble. But on a trip to visit her absentee father, she meets a boy who introduces her to crank. At first she finds it freeing, but soon Kristina's personality disappears inside the drug. What began as a wild, ecstatic ride turns into a struggle through hell for her mind, her soul, and her life.
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Good just not for kids
- By Cindy Brown on 10-21-08
By: Ellen Hopkins
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Lit
- A Memoir
- By: Mary Karr
- Narrated by: Mary Karr
- Length: 12 hrs and 29 mins
- Unabridged
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Lit follows Mary Karr's descent into the inferno of alcoholism and madness - and her astonishing resurrection. Karr's longing for a solid family seems secure when her marriage to a handsome, Shakespeare-quoting poet produces a son they adore. But she can't outrun her apocalyptic past. She drinks herself into the same numbness that nearly devoured her charismatic but troubled mother, reaching the brink of suicide. A hair-raising stint in "The Mental Marriott" awakens her to the possibility of joy, and leads her to an unlikely faith.
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Finally! One for the "Win" column
- By Kim on 03-22-10
By: Mary Karr
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Everywhere I Look
- By: Helen Garner
- Narrated by: Helen Garner
- Length: 6 hrs and 14 mins
- Unabridged
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Spanning 15 years of work, Everywhere I Look is an audiobook full of unexpected moments, sudden shafts of light, piercing intuition, flashes of anger and incidental humour. It takes us from backstage at the ballet to the trial of a woman for the murder of her newborn baby. It moves effortlessly from the significance of moving house to the pleasure of rereading Pride and Prejudice.
By: Helen Garner
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Fallen
- Out of the Sex Industry and into the Arms of the Savior
- By: Annie Lobert
- Narrated by: Annie Lobert
- Length: 6 hrs and 51 mins
- Unabridged
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When Annie grabbed at what looked like an opportunity to escape her tumultuous, abuse-filled home, she had never heard the term sex trafficking. Needing money, wanting to be loved, and desperately seeking control of her life, she stumbled into the ever-darkening world of the sex industry as a glamorous, high-class escort in Las Vegas. All that glittered was not gold. She embarked on a dangerous path toward self-destruction.
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Life Changing
- By Yigosh on 07-03-15
By: Annie Lobert
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The Book of Help
- A Memoir in Remedies
- By: Megan Griswold
- Narrated by: Megan Griswold
- Length: 11 hrs and 14 mins
- Unabridged
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A hilarious and heartbreaking memoir-in-remedies by a self-described "professional soul-searcher" that details a journey of self-discovery through more than 160 tonics, seminars, regimens, and transformative therapies. With a voice that is at once intimate and hilarious, Megan captures the openness and honesty necessary for people to take a new path in life. Listeners will open the audiobook with curiosity about all the different healing therapies that Megan tries, but leave with a new understanding of themselves.
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Mr. Toad's Wild Ride has some serious competition!
- By Elisa R. Goodman on 02-15-19
By: Megan Griswold
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Around the Way Girl
- A Memoir
- By: Taraji P. Henson
- Narrated by: Taraji P. Henson
- Length: 7 hrs and 27 mins
- Unabridged
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With a sensibility that recalls her beloved screen characters, including Yvette, Queenie, Shug, and the iconic Cookie from Empire, yet is all Taraji, the screen actress writes of her families - the one she was born into and the one she created. She shares stories of her father, a Vietnam vet who was bowed but never broken by life's challenges, and of her mother, who survived violence both in the home and on DC's volatile streets. Here, too, she opens up about her experiences as a single mother.
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Around My way, Your Way & Every Woman's way
- By Yolanda on 10-26-16
By: Taraji P. Henson
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Sex with Shakespeare
- Here's Much to Do with Pain, but More with Love
- By: Jillian Keenan
- Narrated by: Jillian Keenan
- Length: 9 hrs and 56 mins
- Unabridged
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Four hundred years after Shakespeare's death, Keenan's smart and passionate memoir brings new life to his work. With 14 of his plays as a springboard, she explores the many facets of love and sexuality - from desire and communication to fetish and fantasy. In A Midsummer Night's Dream, Keenan unmasks Helena as a sexual masochist - like Jillian herself. In Macbeth, she examines criminalized sexual identities and the dark side of "privacy".
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Innovative
- By Just Joe on 01-21-17
By: Jillian Keenan
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Abandon Me
- Memoirs
- By: Melissa Febos
- Narrated by: Melissa Febos
- Length: 7 hrs and 28 mins
- Unabridged
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In her critically acclaimed memoir, Whip Smart, Melissa Febos laid bare the intimate world of the professional dominatrix, turning an honest examination of her life into a lyrical study of power, desire, and fulfillment. In her dazzling Abandon Me, Febos captures the intense bonds of love and the need for connection - with family, lovers, and oneself. First, her birth father, who left her with only an inheritance of addiction and Native American blood, its meaning a mystery.
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This journey is captivating to say the least!
- By Ilanna on 08-11-17
By: Melissa Febos
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Thin Places
- A Memoir
- By: Mary E. DeMuth
- Narrated by: Mary E. DeMuth
- Length: 5 hrs and 3 mins
- Unabridged
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In her moving spiritual memoir, Mary DeMuth reflects on the “thin places” of her life—places where she was acutely aware of God’s presence. Through her own story, DeMuth invites you to discover new ways to experience a God who is ready to break through any ordinary day or extraordinary pain and offer you a glimpse of eternity.
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Taking steps toward healing with Thin Places
- By Natalie on 07-20-12
By: Mary E. DeMuth
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I'm the One That I Want
- By: Margaret Cho
- Narrated by: Margaret Cho
- Length: 4 hrs and 57 mins
- Abridged
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I'm the One That I Want, based on her show of the same name, is filled with dead-on insights about the experience of being a woman with attitude, of flowing with the highs and lows of life, and of creating one's own identity and acceptance. It is every bit as hilarious, shocking, and irreverent as she is.
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Hilarious and deeply engrossing
- By Ling on 04-10-03
By: Margaret Cho
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Miss Fortune
- Fresh Perspectives on Having It All from Someone Who Is Not Okay
- By: Lauren Weedman
- Narrated by: Lauren Weedman
- Length: 8 hrs and 33 mins
- Unabridged
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Lauren Weedman is not okay. She's living what should be the good life in sunny Los Angeles. After a gig as a correspondent with The Daily Show with Jon Stewart, she scored parts in blockbuster movies, which led to memorable recurring roles on HBO's Hung and Looking. She had a loving husband and an adorable baby boy. In these comedic essays, she turns a piercingly observant, darkly funny lens on the ways her life is actually not okay.
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Good
- By Ajules29 on 04-02-16
By: Lauren Weedman
What listeners say about The Hilliker Curse
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Pulplife
- 09-28-15
Words from the man himself
Would you listen to The Hilliker Curse again? Why?
Yes he is a fascinating person and I love his fiction work
What other book might you compare The Hilliker Curse to and why?
His Crime Wave series and My Dark Place
Have you listened to any of James Ellroy’s other performances before? How does this one compare?
No this is my first I enjoyed it, He has a very strange way of talking but that is him
Was there a moment in the book that particularly moved you?
Yes how his inspirations from life mold his story and his relationships
Any additional comments?
Some have given bad reviews of his reading it is strange but hey thats the Man
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- Michael Dean
- 06-07-24
Frank and revealing
The book lays bare the root of Ellroy's obsessions. Who knew the Demon Dog was such a hopeless romantic?
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- Derek
- 03-30-15
Dark & Dirty Memoir by a Brilliant/Tormented Man
What did you love best about The Hilliker Curse?
He doesn't spare the dirty details. It's honesty difficult to stomach sometimes, but his straightforwardness is what made it so interesting. He portrays himself as a filthy pig of a man: a thief, liar and real life creeper. He was a criminal and writing saved him.
What did you like best about this story?
It was a unique experience to get inside the mind of a man that writes such great fiction. His honest portrayal of his life was the best part of the story. He's still a mess, but he keeps trying.
Have you listened to any of James Ellroy’s other performances before? How does this one compare?
The performance was similar to his other books. However, the passionate expressions of his own experiences (dirty as they were), along with the, 'Ellroy Style' of writing make this one particularly intense. James Ellroy is to crime fiction what Doug Stanhope is to comedy: he's not for everyone, but his real fans can't get enough.
If you were to make a film of this book, what would the tag line be?
The Making of the Biggest Name in Noir
Any additional comments?
It took me a long time to sit down and write this review. Part of that was ADHD, but the other was that I haven't ever read anything quite like this before. It's powerful, intense but also disgusting. There were parts that really turned me off, but there seemed a glimmer of goodness (like in many of his characters) that made me go on. The retelling of his story may not contain 100% of what happened in his life, but shows a willingness to be honest about what he feels shaped him. It challenged me to take a hard look at my own life in the sober way that he did. This may never be his biggest seller, but it was good enough that I listened to it 3 times. Thanks for the honesty, James!
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2 people found this helpful
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- Darwin8u
- 12-13-16
Veering toward Vacancy
"The word MORE summarized my private agenda. It was sexual compulsion fueled by a terror of human contact and the forfeit of mental control. I could brood, peep, stalk, think and self-narrate. I could not act."
- James Ellroy, The Hilliker Curse
Probably 3.5 stars. It is funky, narcissistic, bizarre, transgressive, beautiful and brutal. It is Oedipus chasing the memory of his dead mother in the faces and windows of random women. It isn't a book I'd recommend to my wife or my mother, but it was fascinating and really did carry a certain amount of redemption and hope. Ellroy is one of the handful of living writers I actually give a damn about meeting some day. I'd certainly not want my daughter or wife or mother to meet him, however. Many writers who I adore I have no drive or motivation to meet. None. Ellroy is an artist I want to road trip with.
His voice, his openness both resonate strongly with me. I really think Ellroy is one of the handful of genre writers (King, le Carré, etc) that will be read in 300+ years. So, I guess this book will be a bit of a help for future PhD writers in further dissecting Ellroy's novels. He is both a dark room and an open book. He captures something about the 20th century and himself in every book he writes and seems to leave blood, sweat, and semen on every page.
There is something beautiful about the scar that is left when a scab is picked away. Some of the lines from this very exhibitionist memoir hit me hard and left a mark:
1. "The absence of a narrative line left me weightless. I didn't know what it meant then. I'll ascribe meaning now."
2. "I always get what I want. It comes slow or fast and always costs a great deal."
3. "My always-present self-absorption veered to vacancy."
4. "Opportunists ruthlessly cling to emergent imagery and people."
5. "I was having it both ways. I was mending fences I intended to jump."
Anyway, I've written more tonight than I wanted or intended. I'll add one more thing. It was fantastic hearing Ellroy narrate his own memoir. Wildman indeed!
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9 people found this helpful
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- Michael Gifford
- 05-01-17
Uniquely Ellroy
Perved out and fascinating! The demon dog is brutally honest and it is as weird as you probably thought it would be.
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1 person found this helpful
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- Anonymous User
- 09-22-22
James Ellroy should not narrate
It would have been easier to follow if someone else had narrated it. Also, The Big Hurt by Ericka Schickel tells a better story of her side of their relationship.
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Overall
- Doug Smith
- 05-22-11
Annoying, Degrading
Ellroy's delivery is comically bad. The book itself is degrading to one's soul. That sounds corny but his content is trashy, pre-adolescent, not even a titillating peek into a pervert's mind, but a flat-out mud wrestle. It's like sitting next to a drunk in a bar telling his disgusting life story.
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2 people found this helpful
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- Eddie Wittern
- 11-20-18
I love his other books, but this was a chore.
So, James Elroy is very very hard to listen to. His voice tone pitch and inflection are literally all over the place and make it hard to follow the story and pay attention to. After listening I'm asking myself. What was that?
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Overall
- Charles LaBorde
- 01-19-11
Jim, Hire an Actor
I am a tremendous fan of James Ellroy. I've read all the books and have others from Audible so that I can enjoy them in that format as well. LA Confidential and American Tabloid are two of the great crime novels of the century. When Ellroy writes about himself it is frank to the point of giving us a lot more information than anyone really wants to learn, but I still looked forward to the chance to hear Ellroy read his own work. I have seen him in person at The Mysterious Bookshop in NYC and found him to be a fascinating speaker--delightfully candid. So when I started listening, I was shocked at how weak an entry this was. Much of the book rehashes ground he has covered much more successfully before, but that aside, Ellroy suffers from an incredible fault of overacting. His delivery of this audio book would be overacted in a football stadium. In the confines of one's home or automobile, it is a boring, grating mess.
Some authors are brilliant readers of their own work--Amy Tan, early Tony Hillerman, for example. Ellroy, who turns out a new novel every 5 to 10 years these days, needs to focus on writing and leave the reading of his books to someone who knows what he is doing. Check out the brilliant Blood's a Rover instead.
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5 people found this helpful
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Overall
- J
- 11-20-10
Horrible reading job
If you're considering this book, you're probably a fan of Ellroy, like I am. And the book is mildly interesting -- his difficulties in relating to women throughout his life. But the book is read by the author, and he's just not good at all. I've been listening to it while driving to work for three weeks, and it's all I can do to avoid driving over a bridge to end it. Ellroy has a certain rhythm in how he processes prose. Perhaps it helps him to be a genius writer. But the reading aloud -- must stop.
It's bad enough that I would advise against getting this. Just read this book in print if you're interested.
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4 people found this helpful