The Laird’s Brawny Bairns and the Bonniest Lass in Scotland

A Highland Romance… Sort Of.

Hoots ma' Granny! If ye enjoyed The Porridge Eaters of Strathclyde - then here's another ridiculous plot from the pen of Bonnie McSwoon.

In the misty, rugged Highlands of Scotland, where men are braw, lassies are bonnie, and kilts are suspiciously wind-resistant, Laird Angus McHaggis-McBroadsword III rules his clan with an iron fist—and an even ironier six-pack.

But when he learns that Lady Mhairi MacThistle—the fiercest, most untameable lass in all of Scotland—is being forced into marriage with a posh English lord whose only talent is looking slightly bored at all times, Angus does what any self-respecting Highland warrior would do.

He kidnaps her.

It does not go to plan.

Between a kidnapping that turns into an all-out brawl, a suspiciously dramatic bothy incident, a Highland Games showdown involving weaponized porridge, and a Loch Ness Monster who takes an unexpected interest in their love life, Angus and Mhairi are about to discover that love is war, war is ridiculous, and nothing in the Highlands is ever simple.

Will Mhairi surrender her heart to the brooding laird?

Will Angus survive a relationship with a woman who keeps threatening to punch him?

Will the judgmental sheep ever approve of their life choices?

One thing’s for certain: Scotland will never be the same again.

Perfect for fans of sweeping Highland romances—and for those who enjoy watching them be mercilessly sent up—The Laird’s Brawny Bairns and the Bonniest Lass in Scotland is a rollicking, kilt-clad romp through love, chaos, and aggressively unnecessary flexing.

WARNING: May contain shirtless brooding, dramatic bagpipe solos, and a deeply unimpressed heroine who is not here for any of this nonsense.