The Naked Clone
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Narrated by:
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Conor Lastowka
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Michael J. Nelson
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Kevin Murphy
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Bill Corbett
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Sean Thomason
About this listen
This hilarious mystery was written serially by the minds behind RiffTrax, with each writer picking up where the last left off.
There’s trouble in Hollywood. Big surprise, Sheepdip, there’s always trouble in Hollywood. But for Yours Truly, Nick Nolte, private dick, actor, entrepreneur, collector of exotic and often dangerous commodities, and People magazine’s Sexiest Man Alive (1992), Hollywood is a filthy, decaying, half-empty swimming pool, and I’m gonna dive in head-first. Someone’s kidnapping Hollywood bigwigs? Hell, I wish I’d thought of it first. Clones runnin’ amok from Pismo to Tijuana?
Sounds like fun, hand me a gun. A dame in distress willing to hire me for a sack a’ quarters? I’m in. I’ll even put on my best shirt for the job, which is easy, ’cause it’s my only shirt. A diabolical plot to mess with the space-time continuum and take over Tinseltown, maybe the whole damn world? I’m on the case. I might get distracted, or black out a few times, or both, but I won’t stop till I bring in these evil peckerknobs and win the heart of the femme fatale……Sorry, blacked out there for a minute. Maybe an hour. Maybe a day—look, who’s counting?
So strap in, Shortpants, it’ll be one full-throttle, mind-twisting, weirdass ride, and I got the wheel. Just hand me that bag a’ pills and that can a’ Sterno and try not to scream so damn much.
—Your Pal, Nick
©2023 Conor Lastowka, Michael J. Nelson, Kevin Murphy, Bill Corbett, & Sean Thomason (P)2024 Conor Lastowka, Michael J. Nelson, Kevin Murphy, Bill Corbett, & Sean ThomasonListeners also enjoyed...
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Story
Hilarious, fascinating, and a roller coaster of dizzying, historical what-ifs, Napoleon's Hemorrhoids is a potpourri for serious historians and casual history buffs. In one of Phil Mason's many revelations, you'll learn that Communist jets were two minutes away from opening fire on American planes during the Cuban missile crisis, when they had to turn back as they were running out of fuel. You'll discover that before the Battle of Waterloo, Napoleon's painful hemorrhoids prevented him from mounting his horse to survey the battlefield.
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They just throw the facts too fast
- By Concerned_llama on 12-11-20
By: Phil Mason
What listeners say about The Naked Clone
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- Kathleen reed
- 09-03-24
funny
the reading was excellent- usually the narrators suck in the audible reads. Hopefully, you'll get better narrators
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- Jukilum
- 08-25-24
Somewhat amusing
There were some amusing parts. The story moves really slowly as it gets bogged down in endless asides that are meant to be humorous. For me that humor was successful only some of the time.
There were a lot of references to various RiffTrax movies and shorts. Listener’s enjoyment will probably be limited without an extensive knowledge of the RiffTrax catalog.
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