-
The Panchira Protocol
- Narrated by: Razor After Dark
- Length: 3 hrs and 25 mins
Failed to add items
Add to Cart failed.
Add to Wish List failed.
Remove from wishlist failed.
Adding to library failed
Follow podcast failed
Unfollow podcast failed
Get 2 free audiobooks during trial.
Buy for $14.95
No default payment method selected.
We are sorry. We are not allowed to sell this product with the selected payment method
Publisher's summary
Peeping Tom has spent years locked up in a mental institution because of his penchant for lifting girl's skirts. So when a busload of Catholic schoolgirls arrives on the scene, he thinks all his Christmases have come at once. But these aren't normal schoolgirls. They're here to chew gum and kick ass, and they're all out of gum.
Join Tom and his fellow psychiatric inmates as they fight to survive the zombie apocalypse, nuclear annihilation, and the perils of a diet consisting only of rice and beans.
Will the pervert prevail? And if not, how many skirts can he lift before he gets his comeuppance? Will Alice the teenage vampire indulge in her own version of the Holy Communion? And most importantly of all...Rebecca, will you stop pulling Jasmine's hair! This is your last warning!
Related to this topic
-
Project Hail Mary
- By: Andy Weir
- Narrated by: Ray Porter
- Length: 16 hrs and 10 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Ryland Grace is the sole survivor on a desperate, last-chance mission - and if he fails, humanity and the Earth itself will perish. Except that right now, he doesn't know that. He can't even remember his own name, let alone the nature of his assignment or how to complete it. All he knows is that he's been asleep for a very, very long time. And he's just been awakened to find himself millions of miles from home, with nothing but two corpses for company.
-
-
Bazinga
- By Davidgonzalezsr on 05-04-21
By: Andy Weir
-
Wynonna Earp
- Tales from Purgatory
- By: Emily Andras
- Narrated by: Melanie Scrofano, Tim Rozon, Dom Provost-Chalkley, and others
- Length: 4 hrs
- Original Recording
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Saddle up and join Wynonna Earp on an immersive new audio adventure in the gritty supernatural world of Purgatory. This Audible Original invites you deeper into the Weird West to follow Wynonna Earp (Melanie Scrofano), as she embarks on her craziest adventure yet: riding off into the sunset with her soulmate, Doc Holliday (Tim Rozon)—yes ... that Doc Holliday. Brace yourself for more wise-cracking demon hunters, earth-shattering revelations and all the genre-blending action you've come to expect from the cult hit TV series.
-
-
Happy #Earper ☺️
- By Kate Skidmore on 10-17-24
By: Emily Andras
-
Starter Villain
- By: John Scalzi
- Narrated by: Wil Wheaton
- Length: 8 hrs and 5 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Inheriting your uncle's supervillain business is more complicated than you might think. Particularly when you discover who's running the place. Charlie's life is going nowhere fast. A divorced substitute teacher living with his cat in a house his siblings want to sell, all he wants is to open a pub downtown, if only the bank will approve his loan. Then his long-lost uncle Jake dies and leaves his supervillain business (complete with island volcano lair) to Charlie. But becoming a supervillain isn't all giant laser death rays and lava pits.
-
-
Volcanic Lairs, Death Rays & Cats… Oh My! 😼
- By C. White on 09-19-23
By: John Scalzi
-
The Martian
- By: Andy Weir
- Narrated by: Wil Wheaton
- Length: 10 hrs and 59 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Six days ago, astronaut Mark Watney became one of the first people to walk on Mars. Now, he's sure he'll be the first person to die there. After a dust storm nearly kills him and forces his crew to evacuate while thinking him dead, Mark finds himself stranded and completely alone with no way to even signal Earth that he’s alive - and even if he could get word out, his supplies would be gone long before a rescue could arrive. But Mark isn't ready to give up yet.
-
-
I love Wil Wheaton but why not R. C. Bray?
- By L. Newman on 01-11-20
By: Andy Weir
-
Constituent Service
- A Third District Story
- By: John Scalzi
- Narrated by: Amber Benson
- Length: 2 hrs and 30 mins
- Original Recording
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Ashley Perrin is fresh out of college and starting a job as a community liaison for the Third District–the city’s only sector with more alien residents than humans. Ashley’s barely found where the paper clips are kept when she’s beset with constituent complaints–from too much noise at the Annual Lupidian Celebration Parade to a trip-and-fall chicken to a very particular type of alien hornet that threatens the very city itself. And if that’s not terrifying enough, Ashley is next up at the office karaoke night.
-
-
What a silly and sweet quick listen!
- By Geoffrey Christian on 10-08-24
By: John Scalzi
-
Temporal
- By: Julian Simpson, Richard MacLean Smith, Bec Boey, and others
- Narrated by: Nicola Walker, Sanjeev Bhaskar, Jessie Mei Li, and others
- Length: 4 hrs and 26 mins
- Original Recording
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
In the not-too-distant future, a 21-member crew launches from Earth. Their mission: to establish a temporary colony on Mars. Little do they know that colony will become permanent–and the last stand of the human race. Because, without warning, every single person left on Earth simply...vanishes. Now, a thousand years later, the resources needed to sustain life are running out, and the very existence of the Mars colony is threatened. Humankind has only one option–to return to its home planet.
-
-
It was ok.
- By Cregg Terasa on 08-06-24
By: Julian Simpson, and others
-
Project Hail Mary
- By: Andy Weir
- Narrated by: Ray Porter
- Length: 16 hrs and 10 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Ryland Grace is the sole survivor on a desperate, last-chance mission - and if he fails, humanity and the Earth itself will perish. Except that right now, he doesn't know that. He can't even remember his own name, let alone the nature of his assignment or how to complete it. All he knows is that he's been asleep for a very, very long time. And he's just been awakened to find himself millions of miles from home, with nothing but two corpses for company.
-
-
Bazinga
- By Davidgonzalezsr on 05-04-21
By: Andy Weir
-
Wynonna Earp
- Tales from Purgatory
- By: Emily Andras
- Narrated by: Melanie Scrofano, Tim Rozon, Dom Provost-Chalkley, and others
- Length: 4 hrs
- Original Recording
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Saddle up and join Wynonna Earp on an immersive new audio adventure in the gritty supernatural world of Purgatory. This Audible Original invites you deeper into the Weird West to follow Wynonna Earp (Melanie Scrofano), as she embarks on her craziest adventure yet: riding off into the sunset with her soulmate, Doc Holliday (Tim Rozon)—yes ... that Doc Holliday. Brace yourself for more wise-cracking demon hunters, earth-shattering revelations and all the genre-blending action you've come to expect from the cult hit TV series.
-
-
Happy #Earper ☺️
- By Kate Skidmore on 10-17-24
By: Emily Andras
-
Starter Villain
- By: John Scalzi
- Narrated by: Wil Wheaton
- Length: 8 hrs and 5 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Inheriting your uncle's supervillain business is more complicated than you might think. Particularly when you discover who's running the place. Charlie's life is going nowhere fast. A divorced substitute teacher living with his cat in a house his siblings want to sell, all he wants is to open a pub downtown, if only the bank will approve his loan. Then his long-lost uncle Jake dies and leaves his supervillain business (complete with island volcano lair) to Charlie. But becoming a supervillain isn't all giant laser death rays and lava pits.
-
-
Volcanic Lairs, Death Rays & Cats… Oh My! 😼
- By C. White on 09-19-23
By: John Scalzi
-
The Martian
- By: Andy Weir
- Narrated by: Wil Wheaton
- Length: 10 hrs and 59 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Six days ago, astronaut Mark Watney became one of the first people to walk on Mars. Now, he's sure he'll be the first person to die there. After a dust storm nearly kills him and forces his crew to evacuate while thinking him dead, Mark finds himself stranded and completely alone with no way to even signal Earth that he’s alive - and even if he could get word out, his supplies would be gone long before a rescue could arrive. But Mark isn't ready to give up yet.
-
-
I love Wil Wheaton but why not R. C. Bray?
- By L. Newman on 01-11-20
By: Andy Weir
-
Constituent Service
- A Third District Story
- By: John Scalzi
- Narrated by: Amber Benson
- Length: 2 hrs and 30 mins
- Original Recording
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Ashley Perrin is fresh out of college and starting a job as a community liaison for the Third District–the city’s only sector with more alien residents than humans. Ashley’s barely found where the paper clips are kept when she’s beset with constituent complaints–from too much noise at the Annual Lupidian Celebration Parade to a trip-and-fall chicken to a very particular type of alien hornet that threatens the very city itself. And if that’s not terrifying enough, Ashley is next up at the office karaoke night.
-
-
What a silly and sweet quick listen!
- By Geoffrey Christian on 10-08-24
By: John Scalzi
-
Temporal
- By: Julian Simpson, Richard MacLean Smith, Bec Boey, and others
- Narrated by: Nicola Walker, Sanjeev Bhaskar, Jessie Mei Li, and others
- Length: 4 hrs and 26 mins
- Original Recording
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
In the not-too-distant future, a 21-member crew launches from Earth. Their mission: to establish a temporary colony on Mars. Little do they know that colony will become permanent–and the last stand of the human race. Because, without warning, every single person left on Earth simply...vanishes. Now, a thousand years later, the resources needed to sustain life are running out, and the very existence of the Mars colony is threatened. Humankind has only one option–to return to its home planet.
-
-
It was ok.
- By Cregg Terasa on 08-06-24
By: Julian Simpson, and others
People who viewed this also viewed...
-
The Magician's Brother
- The Magician's Brother, Book 1
- By: HDA Roberts
- Narrated by: Kevin Kemp
- Length: 12 hrs and 22 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
My twin brother is a Wizard and thinks he's the only magician in the family. It's actually a little funny that he hasn't suspected anything different over the last 17 years - with my constantly need to keep his idiot face out of danger and stupidity - but that's not today's problem. You see, someone's trying to kill him.
-
-
I don't understand the positive reviews
- By Christopher on 06-24-22
By: HDA Roberts
-
The Worst Ship in the Fleet
- Humor, Space Battles, and High Crimes Await!
- By: Skyler Ramirez
- Narrated by: Michael Murphy
- Length: 2 hrs and 51 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Brad Mendoza is an idiot. He knows it, and so does everyone else. A promising naval career down the drain just, because he accidentally killed 504 civilians. So, it's time for him to give up and accept a dead-end command on Persephone, the worst ship in the fleet. Until he meets the beautiful and cunning Jessica Lin, his new executive officer, who harbors a terrible secret of her own. Now, he's in a race to save her and his stupid ship.
-
-
I like it!
- By Raye Avery on 09-03-24
By: Skyler Ramirez
-
AnimeCon
- Harem
- By: FortySixtyFour
- Narrated by: Harriet Sinclair, Jean Paul Garces
- Length: 15 hrs and 40 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Brian attends an anime convention with a mysterious charm.
-
-
5 stars
- By Joshua Airington on 04-15-24
By: FortySixtyFour
-
Maid for You
- A Lamia Romance for Men
- By: Virgil Knightley, Peter North
- Narrated by: Raya Kane, Richard Brock
- Length: 10 hrs and 31 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Arthur Cain was a hero to his city, the most accomplished and respected of the firefighters in his entire district. But when a call comes in from the so-called "Halfbreed Heights", the monsterfolk part of the city, Arthur's life gets flip-turned upside down.
-
-
Love the story
- By Posiden300 on 08-28-24
By: Virgil Knightley, and others
-
The Runic Artist
- Blank Canvas
- By: Ellake
- Narrated by: Adam Stubbs, Mia Fothergill
- Length: 16 hrs and 4 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
In a world where runes hold unimaginable power, mere mortal and gifted artisan Nate must harness arcane magic to navigate treacherous paths, reveal the hidden truths of his own past, and discover the workings of the illusive ‘System’. No big deal. Emboldened by only his penknife and a weirdly profound understanding of runic sorcery, Nate must uncover if the path he has been thrust upon may spare his earthly existence. After all, why only leave your mark on one world… when you might leave it on two?
-
-
Good story with less than perfect narration and writing.
- By Christopher on 09-04-24
By: Ellake
-
Love Addict's RPG V1.00
- By: Punished Kom
- Narrated by: Alfie Syme, Erin Bateman
- Length: 21 hrs and 16 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Stuck working a dead-end job, another lonely Valentine's Day passes Oliver by. There's a coworker he's kind of into, but irl flirting isn't as easy as choosing the right dialog option and clicking a button, sadly... but what if it was? After a lonely night jackin' it under the influence of Special Californian Gummies™, Oliver awakens to what appears to be a complete psychotic breakdown. System notifications, menus, stats, and so much more RPG crap gets injected into his life faster than you can say, 'I Can't Believe It's Not Schizophrenia'.
-
-
Comforting Relationships
- By Anonymous User on 06-06-24
By: Punished Kom
-
The Magician's Brother
- The Magician's Brother, Book 1
- By: HDA Roberts
- Narrated by: Kevin Kemp
- Length: 12 hrs and 22 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
My twin brother is a Wizard and thinks he's the only magician in the family. It's actually a little funny that he hasn't suspected anything different over the last 17 years - with my constantly need to keep his idiot face out of danger and stupidity - but that's not today's problem. You see, someone's trying to kill him.
-
-
I don't understand the positive reviews
- By Christopher on 06-24-22
By: HDA Roberts
-
The Worst Ship in the Fleet
- Humor, Space Battles, and High Crimes Await!
- By: Skyler Ramirez
- Narrated by: Michael Murphy
- Length: 2 hrs and 51 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Brad Mendoza is an idiot. He knows it, and so does everyone else. A promising naval career down the drain just, because he accidentally killed 504 civilians. So, it's time for him to give up and accept a dead-end command on Persephone, the worst ship in the fleet. Until he meets the beautiful and cunning Jessica Lin, his new executive officer, who harbors a terrible secret of her own. Now, he's in a race to save her and his stupid ship.
-
-
I like it!
- By Raye Avery on 09-03-24
By: Skyler Ramirez
-
AnimeCon
- Harem
- By: FortySixtyFour
- Narrated by: Harriet Sinclair, Jean Paul Garces
- Length: 15 hrs and 40 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Brian attends an anime convention with a mysterious charm.
-
-
5 stars
- By Joshua Airington on 04-15-24
By: FortySixtyFour
-
Maid for You
- A Lamia Romance for Men
- By: Virgil Knightley, Peter North
- Narrated by: Raya Kane, Richard Brock
- Length: 10 hrs and 31 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Arthur Cain was a hero to his city, the most accomplished and respected of the firefighters in his entire district. But when a call comes in from the so-called "Halfbreed Heights", the monsterfolk part of the city, Arthur's life gets flip-turned upside down.
-
-
Love the story
- By Posiden300 on 08-28-24
By: Virgil Knightley, and others
-
The Runic Artist
- Blank Canvas
- By: Ellake
- Narrated by: Adam Stubbs, Mia Fothergill
- Length: 16 hrs and 4 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
In a world where runes hold unimaginable power, mere mortal and gifted artisan Nate must harness arcane magic to navigate treacherous paths, reveal the hidden truths of his own past, and discover the workings of the illusive ‘System’. No big deal. Emboldened by only his penknife and a weirdly profound understanding of runic sorcery, Nate must uncover if the path he has been thrust upon may spare his earthly existence. After all, why only leave your mark on one world… when you might leave it on two?
-
-
Good story with less than perfect narration and writing.
- By Christopher on 09-04-24
By: Ellake
-
Love Addict's RPG V1.00
- By: Punished Kom
- Narrated by: Alfie Syme, Erin Bateman
- Length: 21 hrs and 16 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Stuck working a dead-end job, another lonely Valentine's Day passes Oliver by. There's a coworker he's kind of into, but irl flirting isn't as easy as choosing the right dialog option and clicking a button, sadly... but what if it was? After a lonely night jackin' it under the influence of Special Californian Gummies™, Oliver awakens to what appears to be a complete psychotic breakdown. System notifications, menus, stats, and so much more RPG crap gets injected into his life faster than you can say, 'I Can't Believe It's Not Schizophrenia'.
-
-
Comforting Relationships
- By Anonymous User on 06-06-24
By: Punished Kom