The Tender Bar
A Memoir
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Narrated by:
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J.R. Moehringer
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By:
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J.R. Moehringer
About this listen
At eight years old, suddenly unable to find The Voice on the radio, J.R. turned in desperation to the bar on the corner, where he found a rousing chorus of new voices. Cops, bookies, soldiers, and stumblebums, all sorts of men gathered in the bar to tell their stories and forget their cares. The alphas along the bar, including J.R.'s uncle Charlie, a Humphrey Bogart look-alike; Colt, a Yogi Bear sound-alike and Joey D, a soft-hearted brawler, took J.R. to the beach, to ballgames, and ultimately into their circle. They taught J.R., tended him, and provided a kind of fatherhood-by-committee.
Torn between the stirring example of his mother and the lurid romance of the bar, J.R. tried to forge a self somewhere in the center. But when it was time for J.R. to leave home, the bar became an increasingly seductive sanctuary, a place to return and regroup during his picaresque journeys. Time and again, the bar offered shelter from failure, rejection, heartbreak, and eventually from reality.
In the grand tradition of landmark memoirs, The Tender Bar is suspenseful, wrenching, and achingly funny. A classic American story of self-invention and escape, of the fierce love between a single mother and an only son, it's also a moving portrait of one boy's struggle to become a man, and an unforgettable depiction of how men remain, at heart, lost boys.
©2005 J.R. Moehringer (P)2005 HyperionListeners also enjoyed...
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Critic reviews
- 2005 Audie Award Winner, Narration by the Author
- 2005 Audie Award Nominee, Biography/Memoir
"Funny, honest, and insightful." (Booklist)
"[Moehringer's] the best memoirist of his kind since Mary Karr wrote The Liars' Club." (The New York Times)
"In his gimlet-eyed memoir, The Tender Bar, J.R. Moehringer lovingly and affectingly toasts a boyhood spent on a barstool." (Vanity Fair)
"The Tender Bar will make you thirsty for that life: its camaraderie, its hilarity, its seductive, dangerous wisdom." (Richard Russo)
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When George Hodgman leaves Manhattan for his hometown of Paris, Missouri, he finds himself - an unlikely caretaker and near-lethal cook - in a head-on collision with his aging mother, Betty, a woman of wit and will. Will George lure her into assisted living? When hell freezes over. He can't bring himself to force her from the home both treasure - the place where his father's voice lingers, the scene of shared jokes, skirmishes, and, behind the dusty antiques, a rarely acknowledged conflict...
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Title Should Be Georgeville-It's All About George
- By Sara on 10-08-15
By: George Hodgman
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The Hour I First Believed
- A Novel
- By: Wally Lamb
- Narrated by: George Guidall
- Length: 25 hrs and 9 mins
- Unabridged
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When high-school teacher Caelum Quirk and his wife, Maureen, move to Littleton, Colorado, they both get jobs at Columbine High School. In April 1999, while Caelum is away, Maureen finds herself in the library at Columbine, cowering in a cabinet and expecting to be killed. Miraculously, she survives. But when Caelum and Maureen flee to an illusion of safety on the Quirk family's Connecticut farm, they discover that the effects of chaos are not easily put right.
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excellent all around yarn
- By G. on 01-10-09
By: Wally Lamb
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Our Story Begins
- New and Selected Stories
- By: Tobias Wolff
- Narrated by: Anthony Heald
- Length: 13 hrs and 5 mins
- Unabridged
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Wolff here returns with fresh revelations - about biding one's time, or experiencing first love, or burying one's mother - that come to a variety of characters in circumstances at once everyday and extraordinary. A retired Marine enrolls in college while her son trains for Iraq. A lawyer takes a difficult deposition. An American in Rome indulges the Gypsy who's picked his pocket.
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Great
- By chris on 04-11-08
By: Tobias Wolff
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Chanel Bonfire
- By: Wendy Lawless
- Narrated by: Wendy Lawless
- Length: 6 hrs and 20 mins
- Unabridged
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By the time Wendy Lawless turned 17, she'd known for quite some time that she didn't have a normal mother. But that didn't stop her from wanting one.... Georgann Rea didn't bake cookies or go to PTA meetings; she wore a mink coat and always had a lit Dunhill plugged into her cigarette holder. She went through men like Kleenex, and didn't like dogs or children. Georgann had the ice queen beauty of a Hitchcock heroine and the cold heart to match.
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Not an Engaging Listen
- By Sobriquet on 03-13-13
By: Wendy Lawless
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Bullet in the Brain
- By: Tobias Wolff
- Narrated by: Anthony Heald
- Length: 13 mins
- Unabridged
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Anders is an angry, cynical man. A book critic known for his scathing reviews, he finds any excuse to dismiss, belittle, or insult. This afternoon is no more agitating than the next. Angers finds himself in a long line at the bank, waiting to reach a teller. Even after two men - wearing masks and carrying guns - take control of the building, Anders is unfazed. It's this behavior that lands him with a pistol against his stomach and a man screamingin his face. And when the bank robber, indignant over Anders' behavior, shoots the book critic in the head, his mind floats through the memories of his life, settling on one particular event....
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The Perfect Example
- By Sarah on 08-01-17
By: Tobias Wolff
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Lifted by the Great Nothing
- By: Karim Dimechkie
- Narrated by: Neil Shah
- Length: 8 hrs and 52 mins
- Unabridged
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Max doesn't remember his mother, who was murdered by burglars before they emigrated from Beirut to New Jersey. He lives with his father, Rasheed, who is enamored of his concept of American culture - baseball and barbeques - and tries to shed his Lebanese heritage completely.
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Excellent
- By Cheyenne on 06-13-15
By: Karim Dimechkie
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She's Come Undone
- By: Wally Lamb
- Narrated by: Linda Stephens
- Length: 18 hrs and 22 mins
- Unabridged
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Meet Dolores Price. She's 13, wise-mouthed but wounded, having bid her childhood goodbye. Beached like a whale in front of her bedroom TV, she spends the next few years nourishing herself with the Mallomars, potato chips, and Pepsi her anxious mother supplies. When she finally rolls into young womanhood at 257 pounds, Dolores is no stronger and life is no kinder. But this time she's determined to rise to the occasion and give herself one more chance before really going belly-up.
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Really disappointing narrator!
- By Jessica Williams on 01-21-12
By: Wally Lamb
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Too Bright to Hear Too Loud to See
- By: Juliann Garey
- Narrated by: Dan Butler
- Length: 11 hrs and 7 mins
- Unabridged
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In her tour-de-force first novel, Juliann Garey takes us inside the restless mind, ravaged heart, and anguished soul of Greyson Todd, a successful Hollywood studio executive who leaves his wife and young daughter and for a decade travels the world giving free reign to the bipolar disorder he's been forced to keep hidden for almost 20 years.
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Psychosis or Syphilis?
- By Vira on 04-02-13
By: Juliann Garey
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Baltimore Blues
- Tess Monaghan, Book 1
- By: Laura Lippman
- Narrated by: Deborah Hazlett
- Length: 9 hrs and 55 mins
- Unabridged
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Unemployed at 29, Tess Monaghan is willing to take any freelance job to pay the rent—including a bit of unorthodox snooping for her rowing buddy, Darryl "Rock" Paxton. In a city where someone is murdered almost every day, attorney Michael Abramowitz's death should be just another statistic. But the slain lawyer's notoriety—and his noontime trysts with Rock's fiancée—make the case front page news...and point to Rock as the likely murderer. But trying to prove her friend's innocence could prove costly to Tess.
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I'm on #8 - This series is almost unique
- By connie on 02-19-12
By: Laura Lippman
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Open
- An Autobiography
- By: Andre Agassi
- Narrated by: Erik Davies
- Length: 18 hrs and 4 mins
- Unabridged
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From Andre Agassi, one of the most beloved athletes in history and one of the most gifted men ever to step onto a tennis court, a beautiful, haunting autobiography. Agassi brings a near-photographic memory to every pivotal match and every relationship. Never before has the inner game of tennis and the outer game of fame been so precisely limned. In clear, taut prose, Agassi evokes his loyal brother, his wise coach, his gentle trainer, all the people who help him regain his balance and find love at last with Stefanie Graf.
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Just an Incredible Story!
- By Patrick on 12-13-09
By: Andre Agassi
What listeners say about The Tender Bar
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Jennha
- 01-29-14
Loved it.
Would you listen to The Tender Bar again? Why?
Yes - I love JR Moehringer's writing. Didn't realize before I listened to this book that he co-wrote Andre Agassi's memoir, which I also enjoyed so much.
What other book might you compare The Tender Bar to and why?
I just love memoirs - they comprise 90% of the books I read and listen to. This book is among my favorites. I listened to Patti Smith's "Just Kids" just previous to this one and I thought they were both so fantastic.
Have you listened to any of J.R. Moehringer’s other performances before? How does this one compare?
No - but he's great. I often look for books that are read by the author - makes such a difference.
Did you have an extreme reaction to this book? Did it make you laugh or cry?
OMG - I laughed and cried. I just loved the descriptions of the men at the bar and the loving portrayal of Moehringer's relationship to his mom. Very very touching, so thoughtful and sometimes hilariously funny.
Any additional comments?
I give this one my highest recommendation.
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- Ermina Copaceanu
- 12-17-23
Beautiful
Moehringer (I hope I spell his name correctly !) ‘has a way with words’. A touching, heartbreaking and beautiful memoir, the way life is.
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- Kathleen
- 11-28-05
beautifully crafted.
JR has clearly finally "gotten in". This is a beautiful piece that manages to show-case his tremendous skill at crafting a story (albeit true) while sounding like he is just speaking with you (probably helps that he is reading it). In league with "the kite runner", this memoir reaches out and touches your heart without leaving the feeling that you have been forced into an experience like a puppet! I was truly impressed by the author's ability to present very complex characters without conveying any animosity. I truly enjoyed this book!
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3 people found this helpful
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- Anonymous User
- 12-05-22
Amazing Story
I grew up in a bar JUST like this in Detroit !
JR brought back a FLOOD of amazing memories !
Thanks for sharing your experiences !
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- AJ Walker
- 01-12-22
Heart warming, funny, sad and beautiful
There are few things that are close to your heart which can be eloquently expressed in word or print. This book has done both - expressed such things, spoken them and written them, truthfully, from the heart. Well done JR.
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- Carolyn Zahnow
- 12-24-12
Excellent voice!
Is there anything you would change about this book?
It's a memoir so nothing to change.
Would you recommend The Tender Bar to your friends? Why or why not?
Not really. It's not a very unique nor exciting story.
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- Melinda
- 06-24-15
Vulnerable, rowdy, loving and charming all in one.
Very insightful and interesting story of a young boy growing up without a father. I really enjoyed his style of writing and all of the bar stories.
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- Holly Heine
- 08-21-12
One of my favorite all time reads!
Would you recommend this audiobook to a friend? If so, why?
Absolutely
Who was your favorite character and why?
JR of course
What about J.R. Moehringer’s performance did you like?
He offers a very authentic performance as he tells his own story.
Did you have an extreme reaction to this book? Did it make you laugh or cry?
This is a beautiful memoir filled with a cast of rich and interesting real life characters. I laughed and cried many times throughout the story. Even though I initially read it when it was first released, I enjoyed it every bit as much, listening to it on audio.
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- Jon Blankenship
- 03-09-18
This memoir is filled with head and heart
What made the experience of listening to The Tender Bar the most enjoyable?
Hearing the author of a book narrate his own memoir, I think, always adds to the experience. Who does a better job of telling your story than, you? Moehringer is a writer by trade but he could also have a career as a reader of audiobooks if he so chose. His natural voice talent -he got it honest from his father- lends an empathy to the story that an outside narrator may not be able to provide. I thoroughly enjoyed listening to him.
What other book might you compare The Tender Bar to and why?
Hillbilly Elegy, Bruce Springsteen's Born To Run; For whatever unknown reason, I'm drawn to books and characters in which the protagonist has had a strained or unhappy relationship with males in his life and has a mother who has had to overcome the men in her life more than she has had the men be partners. The above books feature both as does The Tender Bar. Moehringer's is one of those stories. I can relate to so many anecdotes in so many books that it feels like I could share a beer with any of the authors that have written on the subject. Dickens/Publicans/Edisons would be a great place to have one of these conversations. What a gathering that would be.
What about J.R. Moehringer’s performance did you like?
He has a naturally smooth and flowing delivery to go along with the richness of his voice. Moehringer is a natural.
Was there a moment in the book that particularly moved you?
There are many. When he talks about Sidney, you can hear in his voice and that maybe he still misses her. If not her, then maybe he misses like most of us that feeling of euphoria on a first date or a first kiss. Whether he misses Sidney now at 53 or doesn't, hearing the hurt in his voice makes the reader remember how badly those moments hurt when you're young and without the years of hindsight that help you get through these events later in life. Whether he's describing Sidney's looks or her charm, he describes her beautifully. Out of these moments, maybe the most memorable moment for me is when he talks about working in the cafe and that maybe right at that moment he's the happiest he'll ever be in life. Right after that realization, Sidney hits the window with a snowball and he realizes that she's just made him even happier. That's just a poignant moment that he talks about but also memorable that he had the foresight to note to himself that that's as happy as he's ever been or may ever be. That thought has stuck with me since reading the book. Not as an afterthought, but the way Moehringer describes that bar makes me miss some of the bars I'd patronize in my youth. The old wood, smell of cigarette smoke and beer, those feel like home to me and make me smile to this day. Moehringer describes those sights and smells here the way I wish I could describe to my friends when I talk about missing the smoky haze in today's nonsmoking establishments.
Any additional comments?
I'd highly recommend this book to anyone who has some of the thoughts about moms and men that I mention above. I first noticed the book years ago due to the striking cover art on the shelf in a bookstore. I didn't buy it but have often thought of it and searched for it here and I'm glad that I did. This is also going to be a good read for someone who misses home, relationships of youth and folks who just like a good memoir. There's something here for everyone.
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- Benjamin N. Powers
- 11-03-14
Extremelt well written
Would you consider the audio edition of The Tender Bar to be better than the print version?
Yes
What was one of the most memorable moments of The Tender Bar?
When he spend the night at Sydney's house - you realize he's in for a complicated journey
Have you listened to any of J.R. Moehringer’s other performances before? How does this one compare?
No, I have not.
Any additional comments?
Excellent read, great format.
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