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Unholy Night
- Narrated by: Peter Berkrot
- Length: 9 hrs and 47 mins
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Publisher's summary
From the author of the New York Times best-selling Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter comes Unholy Night, the next evolution in dark historical revisionism.
They're an iconic part of history's most celebrated birth. But what do we really know about the Three Kings of the Nativity, besides the fact that they followed a star to Bethlehem bearing strange gifts? The Bible has little to say about this enigmatic trio. But leave it to Seth Grahame-Smith, the brilliant and twisted mind behind Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter and Pride and Prejudice and Zombies to take a little mystery, bend a little history, and weave an epic tale.
In Grahame-Smith's telling, the so-called "Three Wise Men" are infamous thieves, led by the dark, murderous Balthazar. After a daring escape from Herod's prison, they stumble upon the famous manger and its newborn king. The last thing Balthazar needs is to be slowed down by young Joseph, Mary, and their infant. But when Herod's men begin to slaughter the first born in Judea, he has no choice but to help them escape to Egypt.
It's the beginning of an adventure that will see them fight the last magical creatures of the Old Testament; cross paths with biblical figures like Pontius Pilate and John the Baptist; and finally deliver them to Egypt. It may just be the greatest story never told.
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Insectoid Dronons have slain the queen Semarritte, throwing into chaos the ten thousand worlds over which she reigned. Desperate to save mankind, Lord Veriasse, Semarritte's near-immortal consort, has created a new queen: Everynne, cloned from her dead mother. Born to rule, Everynne instead is on the run, often only one planet ahead of advancing forces of the invaders, who recognize that Everynne is a powerful rallying point for threatened humanity.
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KISS ME QUICK BIRDS
- By Jim "The Impatient" on 06-16-14
By: David Farland
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The Tiger's Daughter
- By: K Arsenault Rivera
- Narrated by: Caroline McLaughlin
- Length: 14 hrs and 57 mins
- Unabridged
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The Hokkaran Empire has conquered every land within their bold reach - but failed to notice a lurking darkness festering within the people. Now their border walls begin to crumble, and villages fall to demons swarming out of the forests. Away on the silver steppes, the remaining tribes of nomadic Qorin retreat and protect their own, having bartered a treaty with the empire, exchanging inheritance through the dynasties. It is up to two young warriors, raised together across borders since their prophesied birth, to save the world from the encroaching demons.
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Writing format that didn't work for this book
- By kara-karina on 02-24-18
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Web of Eyes
- By: Rhett C. Bruno, Jaime Castle
- Narrated by: Luke Daniels
- Length: 11 hrs and 37 mins
- Unabridged
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When a piece of the crown prince's soul is stolen by a traitorous warlock, disgraced knight Torsten Unger makes it his sworn duty to get it back and save the last hope for the kingdom. But he can't do it alone. Self-proclaimed "World's Greatest Thief" Whitney Fierstown sits in the castle dungeon, destined for the gallows until Torsten offers this choice: rot and die in a dank cell or join him on a dangerous expedition to put his skills to good use and earn his freedom.
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A Fantasy Version of 48 Hours
- By John Kang on 12-24-18
By: Rhett C. Bruno, and others
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The Architect's Apprentice
- By: Elif Shafak
- Narrated by: Piter Marek
- Length: 16 hrs and 54 mins
- Unabridged
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In 1540, 12-year-old Jahan arrives in Istanbul. As an animal tamer in the sultan's menagerie, he looks after the exceptionally smart elephant Chota and befriends (and falls for) the sultan's beautiful daughter Princess Mihrimah. A palace education leads Jahan to Mimar Sinan, the empire's chief architect, who takes Jahan under his wing as they construct (with Chota's help) some of the most magnificent buildings in history.
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I feel like I should like it more than I do
- By nyog on 04-19-17
By: Elif Shafak
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The Emperor's Knife
- Book One of the Tower and Knife Trilogy
- By: Mazarkis Williams
- Narrated by: Paul Boehmer
- Length: 15 hrs and 10 mins
- Unabridged
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There is a cancer at the heart of the mighty Cerani Empire: a plague that marks each victim with a fragment of a greater design. Geometric patterns spread across the skin, until the victim dies in agony or becomes a Carrier, doing the bidding of an evil intelligence. The lost prince Sarmin, the emperor's only surviving brother, lies locked in a hidden room. As the pattern draws closer to the palace he is at last remembered: now he awaits a bride, Mesema, a Windreader from the northern plains.
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Unable to listen
- By T Rao on 09-28-15
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Child of Vengeance
- A Novel
- By: David Kirk
- Narrated by: Mark Bramhall
- Length: 15 hrs
- Unabridged
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Japan in the late 16th century was a land in turmoil. Lords of the great clans schemed against one another, served by aristocratic samurai bound to them by a rigid code of honor. Bennosuke is a high-born but lonely teenager living in his ancestral village. His mother died when he was a young boy, and his powerful warrior father Munisai has abandoned him for a life of service to his Lord, Shinmei. Bennosuke has been raised by his uncle Dorinbo, a Buddhist monk who urges the boy to forgo the violence of the samurai and embrace the contemplative life.
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Clever weaving of history and fiction.
- By JW Crummett on 02-25-16
By: David Kirk
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The Wrath of the Orphans
- Book One of Elmoryn's The Kinless Trilogy
- By: Chris Philbrook
- Narrated by: Kevin T. Collins
- Length: 13 hrs and 5 mins
- Unabridged
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What do you do when everything you've ever known is ripped away from you, leaving nothing but ashes and charred memories behind? You get angry. So very angry. Malwynn and his twin sister, Umaryn, live in a small town in Northern Varrland. In idyllic New Picknell nearly nothing happens, and when their day-to-day routine is interrupted by a skirmish between an invading patrol of the dead from The Amaranth Empire and a defending force from Varrland, their world begins to come undone.
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FURIOUS TICKLING ENSUED
- By Jim "The Impatient" on 09-27-17
By: Chris Philbrook
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Akiri: The Scepter of Xarbaal
- Akiri, Book 1
- By: Brian D. Anderson, Steven Savile
- Narrated by: Jonathan Davis
- Length: 9 hrs and 58 mins
- Unabridged
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Akiri is a blistering new heroic fantasy novel from the multiple award-winning international best sellers Brian D. Anderson and Steven Savile who have come together to create the first adrenalin-filled standalone novel in Akiri's tortured world. Can one betrayal can save a kingdom? Will two destroy it?
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Buy this story!!!
- By wlantz on 11-02-16
By: Brian D. Anderson, and others
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I, Strahd: The Memoirs of a Vampire
- Ravenloft: Strahd, Book 1
- By: P. N. Elrod
- Narrated by: Paul Boehmer
- Length: 8 hrs and 8 mins
- Unabridged
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Some of the parchment pages were the color of cream, thick and substantial, made to last many, many lifetimes. Other pages were thin and desiccated, positively yellow from age, and crackled alarmingly as Van Richten turned them over. There were no ornate illuminations, no fussy borders, only lines of plain text in hard black ink. The flowing handwriting was a bit difficult to follow at first; the writer's style of calligraphy had not been in common use for 300 years. No table of contents, but from the dates it looked to be some kind of history.
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Love it...just one complaint....
- By Ryan Conrad on 03-15-14
By: P. N. Elrod
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Orion
- Orion Series, Book 1
- By: Ben Bova
- Narrated by: Stefan Rudnicki
- Length: 11 hrs and 31 mins
- Unabridged
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John O'Ryan is not a god...not exactly. He is an eternal warrior destined to combat the Dark Lord through all time for dominion of the Earth. Follow him, servant of a great race, as he battles his enemy down the halls of time, from the caves of our ancestors to the final confrontation under the hammer of nuclear annihilation.
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Cornucopia of Genre's
- By Jim "The Impatient" on 06-10-12
By: Ben Bova
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Green
- By: Jay Lake
- Narrated by: Katherine Kellgren
- Length: 16 hrs and 53 mins
- Unabridged
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She was born in poverty, in a dusty village under the equatorial sun. She does not remember her mother, she does not remember her own nameher earliest clear memory is of the day her father sold her to the tall pale man. In the Court of the Pomegranate Tree, where she was taught the ways of a courtesanand the skills of an assassinshe was named Emerald, the precious jewel of the Undying Dukes collection of beauties. She calls herself Green.
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Gods, Cat People, Female Assassins, Whips--
- By Jefferson on 02-11-11
By: Jay Lake
What listeners say about Unholy Night
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- T. Herman
- 09-26-17
Not his best work but entertaining story
SGS is a great storyteller. If I told you the plot of this or some of the situations you'd probably not want to listen but it's told in a way that keeps you engaged. You can forgive some of the clichés and predictability. This would be a terrible movie but worth a listen because it's SGS.
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1 person found this helpful
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- Brothanoomsy
- 10-23-21
Decent story.
Decent story, loved the narrator. It was not what I expected but the narrator was so good that I just kept on listening anyway.
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- Woei How Lee
- 11-08-19
Narrator putting me to bed
Overall story was very interesting and original.
However, the narrator is so monotonous and not able to make it interesting
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- Shawn Holman
- 11-06-19
Good but reads like a screenplay
Stating the obvious that this is a fictionalized account of the birth of Jesus Christ. It doesn't delve into theology though for which I am personally grateful. Instead it focuses on the story of Balthazar and how he (fictionally) fits into the story. There's a lot of action, there's some really gruesome scenes which are pretty disturbing and graphically described. There's so much description of action that it almost reads like a screenplay and knowing that he is a screenplay writer and his previous books have been made into movies it felt, at times, like he was writing it for a movie rather than writing it to be read as a novel. For example, there's a lot of beheadings - a lot - and they're done so effortlessly and cleanly, at times by pretty feeble people that it seems very movie-ish because in reality, it's not easy to slice through a spine. Peter Berkrot as the narrator was spectacular.
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- Amazon Customer
- 12-15-23
very descriptive
I understand he wants us to hate the bad guys but man it was hard to hear about his little brother's death. at least we can be pretty positive the centurion had a bad ending.
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- Kindle Customer
- 12-13-16
great book, very entertaining
The author's imagination is amazingl to come up with this story.The story is well written.
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1 person found this helpful
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- Leslie
- 12-14-19
Amazing tale!
Don't be afraid about this being religious propaganda, this is simply a great story.
People who never heard of Christianity could get just as much enjoyment out of this.
Great book and flawless performance by the narrator.
Small note if you're squeamish: there is some violence and torture, but it serves a purpose.
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- Jessica Garcia
- 11-08-18
WOW!!!
I was completely amazed at how wonderful this book is. Not my normal genre to listen to but I gave it a chance and am very glad I did. So entertaining and interesting!!! Loved it.
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- Troy
- 02-25-16
"Wise guy" swashbuckles Judea; Jesus supervises.
Would you say that listening to this book was time well-spent? Why or why not?
This book is only good for escapist entertainment. And even then, there are better choices. So .... no.
Would you listen to another book narrated by Peter Berkrot?
He is a good character-reader. Meaning I would listen to him read something with extravagant characters. He voiced Herod in an over-the-top fashion and I can't decide if that was a good thing or if it made the story sillier than it should have been. Thinking back on it, I'm not sure he had a choice. The character is written as a depraved, raving lunatic. Yeah. I'd give Berkrot another shot.
If this book were a movie would you go see it?
It feels like it was written to be filmed, actually. And no, I wouldn't.
Any additional comments?
Unholy Night is basically a sword-and-sorcery (or maybe a swashbuckling) version of the story of the three wise men (not wise men at all, BTW) who attended Christ's birth. From the book blurb I expected something a bit more historical and a bit more irreverent, but the story contains very few historical detail and actually treats the source material with a good deal of respect (which is certainly fine with me). It wasn't a bad yarn, and had flashes of solid/poignant writing, but overall it was just kind of a pot-boiler adventure. Not a lot of food for thought.
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- Hope Bray
- 05-05-15
I'd be biased but for the fact....
Would you recommend this audiobook to a friend? If so, why?
Absolutely. Seth Grahame-Smith is an incredibly unique spinner of what we've become accustomed to. Y'know - Abe Lincoln is a vampire hunter; lovely Elizabeth Bennet on a quest to end a zombie plague in a retelling of Jane Austen's Pride & Prejudice; and most recently in his The Last American Vampire, sequel to Abraham Lincoln - Vampire Hunter. Tucked in among these beauties is Unholy Night. In the tradition of Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are dead, Grahame-Smith tells about the Three Wisemen from the Bible - Balthazar, Melchior, and Caspar. And at the risk of exposing my inner heathen, they're bad-asses.
Who was your favorite character and why?
Balthazar - Peter Berkrot plays him perfectly. Charismatic, endearingly arrogant, full of dry wit, and extraordinarily cunning.
Which character – as performed by Peter Berkrot – was your favorite?
Balthazar - Peter Berkrot plays him perfectly. Charismatic, endearingly arrogant, full of dry wit, and extraordinarily cunning. Berkrot has the perfect delivery for this book. He's eloquent yet seedy. He has a rich 'drive' (so-to-speak) to his voice that lends heavily to it's subject matter; bordering on regal while making you feel as though you're very lucky to be in on this "true" story about the Three Wisemen that many people don't know.
Any additional comments?
My subject line refers to the fact that I know Peter Berkrot personally. So while I'm more than inclined to sing him praises even if he were terrible (LOL!), this is actually the first book of his that I listened to. As a human being, he's such a pain in the *ss, but as a narrator he's blown me away. I asked him to recommend one of his faves that he's narrated over the years and he told me Unholy Night. I can see why. It's an outstanding story made all the more so with perfect casting. I can't recommend Unholy Night enough. As for his other books. Meh. We'll see. LOL! If you happen to read this, truly impressive, Peter. Truly impressive.
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10 people found this helpful