Would It Kill You to Stop Doing That?
A Modern Guide to Manners
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Narrated by:
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Henry Alford
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By:
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Henry Alford
About this listen
"We all know bad manners when we see them," NPR and Vanity Fair contributor Henry Alford observes at the beginning of his new book. But what, he asks, do good manners look like in our day and age? When someone answers their cell phone in the middle of dining with you, or runs you off the sidewalk with their doublewide stroller, or you enter a postapocalyptic public restroom, the long-revered wisdom of Emily Post can seem downright prehistoric.
Troubled by the absence of good manners in his day-to-day life by the people who clip their toenails on the subway or give three-letter replies to one's laboriously crafted missives, Alford embarks on a journey to find out how things might look if people were on their best behavior a tad more often.
He travels to Japan (the "Fort Knox Reserve" of good manners) to observe its culture of collective politesse. He interviews etiquette experts both likely (Judith Martin, Tim Gunn) and unlikely (a former prisoner, an Army sergeant). He plays a game called Touch the Waiter. And he volunteers himself as a tour guide to foreigners visiting New York City in order to do ground-level reconnaissance on cultural manners divides. Along the way (in typical Alford style) he also finds time to teach Miss Manners how to steal a cab; designates the World's Most Annoying Bride; and tosses his own hat into the ring, volunteering as an online etiquette coach.
Ultimately, by tackling the etiquette questions specific to our age - such as "Why shouldn't you ask a cab driver where's he's from?", "Why is posting baby pictures on Facebook a fraught activity?", and "What's the problem with 'No problem'?" - Alford finds a wry and warm way into a subject that has sometimes been seen as pedantic or elitist. And in this way, he looks past the standard "do's" and "don'ts" of good form to present an illuminating, seriously entertaining book about grace and civility, and how we can simply treat each other better.
©2012 Henry Alford (P)2012 Hachette AudioListeners also enjoyed...
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- Narrated by: Clinton Kelly
- Length: 4 hrs and 55 mins
- Unabridged
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Clinton Kelly is probably best known for teaching women how to make their butts look smaller. But in I Hate Everyone, Except You, he reveals some heretofore unknown secrets about himself, like that he's a finicky connoisseur of 1980s pornography, a disillusioned critic of New Jersey's premier water parks, and perhaps the world's least enthused high school commencement speaker.
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Filthy language overshadowed stories
- By Doris on 04-29-17
By: Clinton Kelly
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The Wrong End of the Table
- A Mostly Comic Memoir of a Muslim Arab American Woman Just Trying to Fit In
- By: Ayser Salman, Reza Aslan - foreword
- Narrated by: Ayser Salman, Assaf Cohen
- Length: 7 hrs and 35 mins
- Unabridged
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Part memoir and part how-not-to guide, The Wrong End of the Table is everything you wanted to know about Arabs but were afraid to ask, with chapters such as “Tattoos and Other National Security Risks,” “You Can’t Blame Everything on Your Period; Sometimes You’re Going to Be a Crazy Bitch: and Other Advice from Mom,” and even an open letter to Trump. This is the story of every American outsider on a path to find themselves in a country of beautiful diversity.
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Not what I was looking for
- By Amazon Customer on 09-01-22
By: Ayser Salman, and others
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Works Well with Others
- An Outsider's Guide to Shaking Hands, Shutting up, Handling Jerks, and Other Crucial Skills in Business That No One Ever Teaches You
- By: Ross McCammon
- Narrated by: Tom Taylorson
- Length: 4 hrs and 12 mins
- Unabridged
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This is McCammon's honest, funny, and entertaining journey from impostor to authority - a story that begins with periods of debilitating workplace anxiety but leads to rich insights and practical advice from a guy who still remembers what it's like to feel entirely ill equipped for professional success.
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Amusing but really limited
- By Margaret on 11-24-15
By: Ross McCammon
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Schadenfreude, a Love Story
- Me, the Germans, and 20 Years of Attempted Transformations, Unfortunate Miscommunications, and Humiliating Situations That Only They Have Words For
- By: Rebecca Schuman
- Narrated by: Christa Lewis
- Length: 8 hrs and 57 mins
- Unabridged
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Schadenfreude is the story of a teenage Jewish intellectual who falls in love - in love with a boy (who breaks her heart), a language (that's nearly impossible to master), a culture (that's nihilistic but punctual), and a landscape (that's breathtaking when there's not a wall in the way). Rebecca is an everyday, misunderstood '90s teenager with a passion for Pearl Jam and Ethan Hawke circa Reality Bites until two men walk into her high school civics class: Dylan Gellner and Franz Kafka, hitching a ride in Dylan's backpack.
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A humorous, delectable read
- By Amazon Customer on 07-13-17
By: Rebecca Schuman
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Stories I'd Tell in Bars
- By: Jen Lancaster
- Narrated by: Jen Lancaster, John Fletcher
- Length: 8 hrs and 27 mins
- Unabridged
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Unfiltered. Unapologetic. Older, but not wiser, Lancaster goes back to basics in this hilarious essay collection about everything from taking community policing classes to accidentally getting high with her waiter after a fancy dinner. These are the tales she'd tell if she met you in a bar... if she weren't too lazy to put on pants and go to a bar. Offering advice ranging from how to remain happily married to a man who refuses to blow his damn nose already to not creating An Incident at the cheese counter during an attempt at Whole30, she's you, only louder.
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self absorbed
- By D D H on 06-15-19
By: Jen Lancaster
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Nino and Me
- My Unusual Friendship with Justice Antonin Scalia
- By: Bryan A. Garner
- Narrated by: David Colacci
- Length: 15 hrs and 8 mins
- Unabridged
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Author Bryan Garner's friendship with Justice Scalia was instigated by celebrated writer David Foster Wallace and strengthened over their shared love of language. Despite their differing viewpoints on everything from gun control to the use of contractions, their literary and personal relationship flourished. Justice Scalia even officiated at Garner's wedding. In this humorous, touching, and surprisingly action-packed memoir, Garner gives a firsthand insight into the mind, habits, and faith of one of the most famous and misunderstood judges in the world.
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Captivating
- By Jean on 02-20-19
By: Bryan A. Garner
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Funny in Farsi
- A Memoir of Growing Up Iranian in America
- By: Firoozeh Dumas
- Narrated by: Firoozeh Dumas
- Length: 5 hrs and 40 mins
- Unabridged
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In 1972, when she was seven, Firoozeh Dumas and her family moved from Iran to Southern California, arriving with no firsthand knowledge of this country beyond her father's glowing memories of his graduate school years here.
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The melting pot, next generation
- By Jerry on 02-15-08
By: Firoozeh Dumas
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Why I Hate Green Beans
- And Other Confessions About Relationships, Reality TV, and How We See Ourselves
- By: Lincee Ray
- Narrated by: Lincee Ray
- Length: 4 hrs and 57 mins
- Unabridged
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If there is one thing Lincee Ray has learned over the years, it's that the majority of women on the planet struggle with insecurities. Our skinny jeans mock us. Our just-trying-to-help mothers are just driving us crazy. Our social media feeds taunt us with everyone else's picture-perfect lives. It's enough to send you on a gummy-bear bender while binge-watching Friends reruns and not showering for a week. Lincee knows. She's been there. Right there, in fact. Gummy bears and all.
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Perfect in every way!
- By Anonymous User on 10-19-22
By: Lincee Ray
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I Regret Nothing
- A Memoir
- By: Jen Lancaster
- Narrated by: Jen Lancaster
- Length: 9 hrs and 50 mins
- Unabridged
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New York Times best-selling author Jen Lancaster has lived a life based on re-invention and self-improvement. From Bitter Is the New Black to The Tao of Martha, she’s managed to document her (and her generation’s) attempts to shape up, grow up, and have it all - sometimes with disastrous results...Mistakes are one thing; regrets are another. After a girls’ weekend in Savannah makes her realize that she is - yikes! - middle-aged (binge watching is so the new binge drinking), Jen decides to make a bucket list and seize the day.
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The Smug Is Strong With This One
- By T. Filowitz on 05-24-15
By: Jen Lancaster
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Small Admissions
- A Novel
- By: Amy Poeppel
- Narrated by: Carly Robins
- Length: 9 hrs and 40 mins
- Unabridged
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Despite her innate ambition and summa cum laude smarts, Kate Pearson has turned into a major slacker. After being dumped by her handsome French "almost fiancé", she abandons her grad school plans and spends her days lolling on the couch, leaving her apartment only when a dog-walking gig demands it. Her friends don't know what to do other than pass tissues and hope for a comeback while her practical sister, Angela, pushes every remedy she can think of, from trapeze class to therapy to job interviews.
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For fans of "Where'd You Go, Bernadette ?"
- By RueRue on 01-16-17
By: Amy Poeppel
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And When She Was Good
- By: Laura Lippman
- Narrated by: Linda Emond
- Length: 9 hrs and 46 mins
- Unabridged
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Heloise considers it a blessing to be a person who seldom attracts attention. In her suburb, she's just a mom, the young widow with the forgettable job, who somehow never misses a soccer game. In the state capital, she's the redheaded lobbyist with a good cause and a mediocre track record. But in discreet hotel rooms throughout the area, she's the woman of your dreams - if you can afford the hourly fee. For more than a decade, Heloise believed she was safe, managing to keep up this rigidly compartmentalized life. But her secret life is under siege. One county over, another so-called suburban madam has been found dead in her car, an apparent suicide.
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And When She Was Bad...
- By Carole T. on 08-18-12
By: Laura Lippman
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Troublemaker
- Surviving Hollywood and Scientology
- By: Leah Remini
- Narrated by: Leah Remini
- Length: 7 hrs and 12 mins
- Unabridged
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The outspoken actress, talk show host, and reality television star offers up a no-holds-barred memoir, including an eye-opening insider account of her tumultuous and heart-wrenching 30-year-plus association with the Church of Scientology.
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This book is fascinating and funny! Fantastic!
- By Kim on 11-04-15
By: Leah Remini
What listeners say about Would It Kill You to Stop Doing That?
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- G
- 09-23-13
Glad I read it, do not like the sarcasm
Content is absolutely great, yet listening to it, I get a sarcastic vibe, which is unfortunate. Again, listened to it twice, great content.
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2 people found this helpful
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- Emma
- 09-16-12
Very Interesting Book
If you could sum up Would It Kill You to Stop Doing That? in three words, what would they be?
I enjoy etiquette books and this one described various pitfalls with interesting examples of what to do and what not to do in a humorous manner. His examples of his own wrongdoings were amusing and kept him from ever becoming preachy.
What did you like about the performance? What did you dislike?
I found the author's somewhat nasal voice rather distracting at first but when I became used to it I found his narration lively and sympathetic.
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1 person found this helpful
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- Melissa
- 04-08-12
Entertaining
What did you like best about Would It Kill You to Stop Doing That?? What did you like least?
The humour in this book was original.
What does Henry Alford bring to the story that you wouldn’t experience if you just read the book?
The way he talks is pretty engaging.
If this book were a movie would you go see it?
No, it wouldn't lend itself to a movie. It's more a collection of stories than a narrative.
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- Adam
- 07-08-12
Loved it!
What made the experience of listening to Would It Kill You to Stop Doing That? the most enjoyable?
Learning about the Japnese and their habits. Agreeing with him that Americans manners are on the decline.
Have you listened to any of Henry Alford’s other performances before? How does this one compare?
Saw him in San Francisco live and thought he was very humorous!
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