Lent, Mardi Gras, and Rebecca questioning why people willingly deprive themselves of things when life is already hard enough.

Kelsey and Rebecca are still in London after a nice, civilised family dinner, but civility goes out the window the second they hit record.

Rebecca is spiralling over her addictive tendencies, which now include Rescue Remedy, Vicks MicroMist, and aggressively vaping for no reason. She knows she should quit, but it’s not looking likely. Meanwhile, Kelsey can’t cope with Elon Musk’s obsession with repopulating the planet and is considering giving up her little sweet treat for Lent. Rebecca, on the other hand, is giving up absolutely nothing because she simply doesn’t believe in suffering.

Then it’s Mardi Gras talk, where the beads-for-boobs tradition gets discussed in great detail. Rebecca reckons if she took her top off, not a single soul would notice, while Kelsey is fairly certain she’d accidentally flatten three people. This naturally (obviously?) leads to a Would-You-Rather about giving up food or sex. Rebecca’s main concern? Making sure that even if she couldn’t eat, her life would be sustained. Kelsey? Weighing up the pros and cons.

Kelsey accidentally launches an ASMR career, Rebecca is somehow running for Mayor of Fermoy, and both of them are off to The Prince of Wales for a pint, because this much nonsense requires refreshments.

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