In this episode, Dr. Elizabeth McIngvale and Cali Werner tackle the difficult topic of how we avoid anxiety through escapist behaviors and quick fixes. They discuss how ignoring or avoiding distress only strengthens anxiety and provide practical strategies for leaning into discomfort, facing it head-on, and ultimately living a life driven by values instead of fear. Tune in to hear about the dangers of relying on quick fixes like CBD gummies and other fads, and how to embrace the uncomfortable journey toward long-lasting change.

Key Points:

[0:00] - Introduction and Welcome

The hosts introduce the concept of running from anxiety and why it's critical to face discomfort head-on rather than avoiding it.

[1:21] - The Price of Avoidance

Elizabeth and Cali talk about how avoidance behaviors, like ignoring tough conversations or emotions, keep people stuck in anxiety.

[5:38] - The Appeal of Quick Fixes

A deep dive into how quick fixes, such as CBD gummies and fad diets, promise relief but ultimately reinforce anxiety and make it worse.

[16:03] - Restlessness and Overworking

How behaviors like compulsive overworking and restlessness can be ways to avoid facing anxiety, and why slowing down is crucial for healing.

[19:06] - The Power of Sitting in Discomfort

The hosts discuss how learning to sit with discomfort, rather than fleeing from it, is key to managing anxiety. They share personal stories and client examples of this transformative process.

[28:52] - Values-Based Living

What does it mean to live by your values instead of anxiety? Elizabeth and Cali share insights into how aligning your actions with your values can lead to a more fulfilling and anxiety-free life.

Quotable Moments:

[1:50] “If something makes you uncomfortable, that’s a signal you’re growing. Don’t run from it, sit with it.” - Cali Werner

[28:52] "Living by your values means doing what matters to you, not what your anxiety demands." - Dr. Elizabeth MacIngvale

[22:53] “There’s no quick fix. The hard work of confronting anxiety is the only way to truly move forward.” - Dr. Elizabeth MacIngvale

Links Mentioned:

• Anxiety Society Podcast Website: http://anxietysocietypodcast.com
• Instagram: @AnxietySocietyPod
• Book: Sacred Rhythm by Ruth Gayle Barton: https://a.co/d/543RKdj

Facing your anxiety head-on is challenging, but avoiding it only gives it more power. Begin leaning into discomfort and making small changes today by setting values-based goals that align with what truly matters to you. Share your thoughts with us on our website or Instagram, and subscribe to stay updated on future episodes as we dive deeper into mental health topics.

Mentioned in this episode:

World Class Treatment For A Worldwide Need

The OCD Institute of Texas provides compassionate individualized treatment for anxiety, OCD and related disorders with a diverse team of dedicated specialists.

In this episode of The Anxiety Society podcast, Dr. Elizabeth McIngvale and Cali Werner dive into the pervasive issue of people-pleasing. With personal stories and professional insight, they explore the impact of prioritizing others' needs over your own and the internal conflict it creates. They offer practical strategies for recognizing when you're caught in the people-pleasing trap and discuss how setting healthy boundaries can preserve your energy, strengthen your relationships, and protect your sense of self. Whether you’re a “yes” person or find yourself avoiding conflict at all costs, this episode reveals how to honor your needs without guilt.

Key Points:

- [0:01] - Introduction to People-Pleasing

Dr. Elizabeth and Cali introduce the topic and discuss how people-pleasing often results from anxiety and a desire to avoid conflict.

- [5:20] - The Catch-22 of Social Media

They examine the common scenario of withholding moments from social media out of fear of upsetting others and the guilt that follows.

- [12:45] - Boundaries and Self-Awareness

Insight on the need for boundaries, particularly with close family and friends, and recognizing the warning signs of overextending yourself.

- [24:15] - How to Set Boundaries Without Guilt

Cali shares practical steps for setting boundaries empathetically, emphasizing the power of open communication.

- [34:30] - Why People-Pleasing Hurts Self-Identity

The hosts explore how over-accommodating can erode your sense of self and lead to resentment and burnout.

- [42:00] - Taking Back Your Time

Dr. Elizabeth discusses time as a precious resource, advocating for mindful choices that reflect your values over social obligations.

Quotable Moments:

- [0:02:02] - "I often say I don't want feedback right now. But then I wonder, do I want to improve or just feel comfortable?" — Cali Werner

- [12:10] - "People-pleasing keeps you stuck. It's not just exhausting; it chips away at who you really are." — Dr. Elizabeth McIngvale

- [42:30] - "The most valuable gift you have is your time. Spend it on what fulfills you, not just what fills others' expectations." — Cali Werner

Links Mentioned:

• Anxiety Society Podcast Website: https://AnxietySocietyPodcast.com

If people-pleasing is holding you back, it’s time to recognize how it impacts your well-being and reclaim your sense of self. Embrace this opportunity to set boundaries and make choices that reflect your true values. Visit the podcast website to submit questions or join the community on Instagram. Don’t forget to subscribe and leave a review to support the show and reach others on similar journeys.

Mentioned in this episode:

World Class Treatment For A Worldwide Need

The OCD Institute of Texas provides compassionate individualized treatment for anxiety, OCD and related disorders with a diverse team of dedicated specialists.

In this episode of The Anxiety Society, hosts Dr. Elizabeth McIngvale and guest clinician Ryan Judd, take a deep dive into depression. They discuss the challenges of recognizing and managing depression and share practical strategies to help listeners take control of their emotions. With insights on behavioral activation, the importance of community, and how depression intertwines with anxiety, this episode offers clear steps to get back on track when life feels overwhelming.

Key Points:

[0:00] - Welcome and Episode Overview

Elizabeth and Cali introduce today’s guest, Ryan Judd, a clinician at the OCD Institute, Texas, and outline their focus on depression.

[1:20] - Recognizing Depression in Everyday Life

Ryan shares his clinical insights on how depression manifests in various ways, from changes in sleep to loss of interest in activities.

[3:26] - The Power of Behavioral Activation

Ryan and Elizabeth discuss how altering behavior can shift feelings and why action, not rest, is the antidote to depression.

[6:08] - Clinical vs. Everyday Depression

The hosts clarify the difference between feeling depressed occasionally and clinical depression, emphasizing the importance of recognizing prolonged symptoms.

[18:00] - Avoidance and Social Pressure

Elizabeth reflects on her own experience with avoidance and social anxiety, highlighting how small changes in routine can make a big difference.

[31:00] - Finding and Building Community

The conversation touches on how isolation exacerbates depression and why building community is critical for healing.

Quotable Moments:

[3:47] "We don’t have a lot of control over our feelings, but we can control our actions—and that changes everything." - Ryan Judd

[19:17] "Sometimes, when you feel least able to do something, that’s when it’s most important to go do it." - Dr. Elizabeth McIngvale

[43:40] "Not many good things happen in your head—get out of your head and into your life." - Ryan Judd

Links Mentioned:

• Anxiety Society Podcast Website: http://anxietysocietypodcast.com
• Book "Make Your Bed" :https://a.co/d/2GCLs27

In this episode, we learned that taking small, consistent steps can significantly change how we feel over time. Depression doesn’t have to control your life, and the path to healing starts with small actions and reconnecting with your community. Join us next time, and don’t forget to leave us a voice message on our website with your questions and thoughts!

Mentioned in this episode:

World Class Treatment For A Worldwide Need

The OCD Institute of Texas provides compassionate individualized treatment for anxiety, OCD and related disorders with a diverse team of dedicated specialists.