Ep 10: The Inner World Seen and Unseen - The Unspoken Rules of Life: Developing Your Coaching Mindset Podcast By  cover art

Ep 10: The Inner World Seen and Unseen - The Unspoken Rules of Life: Developing Your Coaching Mindset

Ep 10: The Inner World Seen and Unseen - The Unspoken Rules of Life: Developing Your Coaching Mindset

Listen for free

View show details

About this listen

This episode of "The Coach Within," hosted by Coach Jedi, delves into a key concept in coaching: the coaching mindset. It moves beyond the common confusion between a fixed mindset and a growth mindset, explaining that while a growth mindset has merits, it doesn't fully encompass what a coaching mindset is about. The episode emphasizes the importance of embracing the idea that the world within has infinite possibilities and infinite perspectives, as coaches to hold the space for our clients with an agile mindset of learning and empathy.

A central theme is the exploration of the "world that is seen and the world that is unseen". The speaker explains that as we grow, we form internal "rules of life" – unspoken, unwritten rules on our hearts that guide our choices and decisions. These rules are formulated over years from our earliest experiences, influenced by surroundings, family, friends, and life events, serving as a consistent mechanism to protect us. These rules influence our choices daily and, when they become more fixed, contribute to what is sometimes mislabeled as a "fixed mindset". The episode argues that fixed mindsets are not inherently bad and are necessary for certain things, like daily routines, just as rules and doors in a house provide protection and security.

The episode uses the metaphor of an iceberg to illustrate the seen and unseen worlds. What we observe and experience physically is often an interpretation of reality, influenced by our senses and filters. The crucial, unseen part of the iceberg lies beneath the surface – the drivers, motivations, values, beliefs, rules, cultural norms, family culture, and personal viewpoints that influence our choices and how we see the world. This deeper, unseen part is what the coaching process often focuses on. Understanding the unseen world, including these underlying layers (drivers/what, motivations/why, and core rules/who/values/identity), is critical because it impacts and influences everything we can see.

The episode highlights that conflicts and clashes, whether with others or within ourselves, often stem from collisions of these deeper rules and values, like two icebergs meeting. Asking "why are they like that?" is less insightful than understanding the clash of underlying rules and values. Forcing one's rules onto others creates conflict and protest rather than true agreement.

Developing a coaching mindset involves being sensitive to the client's unique "map of the world," understanding that their experience, even of similar events, is filtered through their lens, not ours. Mastery in coaching is not just about certifications but about gaining clarity and mastery of who we are.


The journey of mastery is complex and involves embracing curiosity, learning, humility, and patience. Ultimately, a coaching mindset is about embracing the moment, being sensitive, and understanding one's own worldview and the world one lives in to become a better coach.


Don't forget to check out jedi.coach for more resources and information on upcoming programs. If you found this episode helpful, please follow, share, and leave a review to help others discover The Coach Within podcast.


Want to experience personalized coaching?

Email ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠jedi@jedi.coach⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠—let’s get started to create a transformative experience today.

Let's Brave Your Story.

adbl_web_global_use_to_activate_T1_webcro805_stickypopup
No reviews yet