How to Talk About It

By: Mika Ross Therapist + Relationship Coach
  • Summary

  • This podcast is all about unlocking the secrets of discussing those awkward, cringe-worthy, and often uncomfortable topics.

    Now, let’s be real: talking about hard things, for a lot of us, is like assembling IKEA furniture. It’s confusing, frustrating, and sometimes you end up with an extra screw…which, let’s face it, is basically a metaphor for our emotional lives.

    But, what I’ve learned over the years as a Therapist and Relationship Coach is that the comfort comes from knowing how to talk about hard things well, not in knowing how to avoid tough conversations like the plague. In fact, the key to emotional intimacy and deep, meaningful connections is the ability to have hard conversations.

    Yep, you heard it right. When the thought of saying or hearing, “Let’s talk about it,” doesn’t make you want to run away like a startled squirrel, that’s when the magic happens.

    Cozy up, and let’s dive into the delightful world of awkward chats, vulnerability, and the occasional overshare.

    Life’s too short to avoid the tough stuff…and not talking about it is like trying to hide a giraffe in a phone booth.

    ©2024 Mika Ross. All rights reserved.
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Episodes
  • How to Talk About Household Labor Without Hating Each Other: Part 1
    Oct 14 2024

    Over many years of leading couples out of the sticky situation that is figuring out how to distribute household and family-related tasks fairly, I’ve come to realize that there’s so much that’s INVISIBLE that gets in our way and is SETTING MARRIAGES AND FAMILIES UP TO FAIL.

    I’ve enlisted the help of a Motherhood Sociologist, Dr. Caitlyn Collins, to help me make visible one of the most insidious hurdles. I guarantee your mind will be blown.

    Show Links:

    - Caitlyn’s Book: How to Make Motherhood Work: How Women Manage Careers and Caregiving

    - Caitlyn’s Website

    - Online Workshops with Mika

    - Sign up for Mika’s Newsletter

    - Connect with Mika on IG

    - Disclaimer: www.mikaross.com/disclaimer

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    46 mins
  • Weird Ways ADHD Might Be Impacting Your Relationships
    Jun 24 2024

    “People with ADHD Self-Medicate with Conflict and Drama.” This is the sentence, the title of an online article, that led to one of our kid’s ADHD diagnosis… not being disruptive in the classroom, not underperforming at school, and not complaints from teachers.

    My training did not prepare me for the myriad of ways ADHD can impact relationships. I left my master’s and Ph.D. programs with minimal knowledge of Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder and thought of it mostly as a disorder that impacts productivity and looks like disruptive boys in a classroom. It’s so much more than that.

    Since that diagnosis, I’ve learned a lot about the ADHD brain. Professionally, through this new lens, I’ve watched ADHD-related relationship issues play out in my office with couples over and over again, and while the list of things I listen for is long and often overlaps with neurotypical relationship issues, I can often hear a constellation of things like sensitivity to sound, being quick to anger, feeling like the person is rigid or struggles with flexibility, all-or-nothing thinking…like if they aren’t the best, they’re the worst, they might feel perceived rejection more deeply than most….which might look like being quick to defend, addiction issues, etc. After hearing a few of these in those initial sessions, I ask, “I know this sounds weird, but any ADHD diagnosis between either of you?” and despite this sounding like a weird constellation of struggles…, I am right almost every single time.

    That list isn’t exhaustive, but you catch my drift. And, listen, this isn’t doom and gloom. I think when we can name things, we can change things. And I’ve got quite the guest to help us tease this out.

    ADHD Coach Brooke Schnittman is an esteemed expert in the field of ADHD management and support. With over two decades of experience, Brooke has worked closely with thousands of individuals with ADHD and is dedicated to empowering them to overcome challenges and achieve their full potential. She’s the author of the book Activate Your ADHD Potential and also her podcast SucessFULL with ADHD (links below).

    At her company, Coaching with Brooke, she and her team work to empower individuals with ADHD, help them break through barriers, gain essential tools, and achieve their personal, academic, and professional goals.

    Show Links:

    - Follow Brooke on IG

    - Book: Activate Your ADHD Potential

    - Brooke’s Podcast: SucessFULL with ADHD

    - Online Workshops with Mika

    - Sign up for Mika’s Newsletter

    - Connect with Mika on IG

    - Disclaimer: www.mikaross.com/disclaimer

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    43 mins
  • How to Talk About Sex Drive with Dr. Laurie Mintz, Emeritus Professor, Author, & Sex Therapist
    May 3 2024

    Have you ever wondered if your sex drive is normal? Maybe you couldn’t care less if you ever have sex again…or it seems like this is how your partner feels. At least 33% of women say they have lost interest in sex. Differing sex drives are a huge source of conflict, misunderstandings, and hurt feelings in relationships….it’s just so easy to take this topic personally when it’s not deeply understood.

    Dr. Laurie Mintz, author, emeritus professor, licensed psychologist, and sex therapist joins us today to answer questions like, where has our drive gone, what can we do about it, HOW the heck do we talk about this with our partners, should we be scheduling sex, having “duty sex”, and….should we be faking it? Dr. Lori is seriously one of my idols and being able to chat with her was a DREAM. If this subject stresses you out or makes you sweaty just thinking about it, Dr. Laurie is wise and entertaining, and I hope she will help you feel more at ease about this not-so-easy-to-talk-about subject AND that you leave this podcast feeling more accepting of yourself. Maybe….you’re not broken…

    Show Links:

    - Follow Dr. Laurie

    - Book: Tired Woman’s Guide to Passionate Sex

    - Book: Becoming Cliterate

    - Online Workshops with Mika

    - Sign up for Mika’s Newsletter

    - Connect with Mika on IG

    - Disclaimer: www.mikaross.com/disclaimer

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    41 mins

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