Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast. I’m your host Lori Lee.

Can we agree that our thought habits basically build our worlds? How small we stay, how big we become, what we allow, what we don’t allow, how much we sacrifice, how hard money is to come by, etc. etc. these type of thought habits are the spaces we function from. In today’s show we are talking about thought habits, with the expert Amy Kemp, author of “I See You.”

Stay tuned for my in-depth conversation with this certified Habit Finder coach who has worked with literally hundreds to help people see how our habits impact our lives and how we can replace unhealthy thought habits with more healthy ones.

Amy Kemp not only coaches, but she also gives workshops, speaks on stage, and has now released her new book: I See You. I’m excited to sit with Amy to learn and share as we talk about this powerful piece of our lives - our habits. So let’s hop right in.

Amy, Welcome to the show.

Please join us on the audio program to hear our discussion about the following:

At the start of your book you share this wonderful story of meeting with a woman for the first time, a woman who, as you had coffee shared her career path, her accolades, her successes. A woman who looked to have everything together. When she asked why you had asked her to lunch, you said, “Because I see you. Because I really see you.” Which brought the woman to tears. - WHAT DID YOU MEAN BY “I REALLY SEE YOU?’

What does a certified Habit Finder Coach do?

What are some of the most oft seen habits you see that do not serve people?

What habits do you replace those with?

Boundaries - Let’s talk about thought habits and boundaries. (Let her speak) In your book you quote Prentis Hemphill and her definition, “Boundaries are the distance at which I can love you and me simultaneously.”

In your book you ask a questions, “Wht if everything we want and are trying to create depends on only 1 thing: how connected we are to the source from which all things come?

Do you believe this and why?

Let’s get back to habits - If you had one tool that you have seen really make a difference in helping people realize which habits are holding them back what would it be?

How do we change unhealthy habit? Tell us the story of “Respect the mile.)

Share with us what you have to offer: your coaching, your book, where listeners can find you.

How to find Amy Kemp and the Habit Finder Tool:

Website: Amylynnkemp.com

Insta: @amykempinc

Email: amy@amylynnkemp.com

Often times our habits are something we aren’t even aware of. I certainly do not believe I am aware of all of mine. In fact I am aware of very few of mine. I hope our conversation with Amy Kemp, today, has given you a gentle awareness - a reminder of how important it is to understand the habits - THE AUTOPILOT - we are allowing to run our lives, to create our worlds. To live intentionally - which is what this show is all about - is to be aware, and to make choices, actively.

Blessings to you and yours. May you see your habits as they truly are and use your power to shift what you wish to shift, to respect the mile you are currently running. Until the next show - Live beautifully and with heart. See you in two weeks.

Welcome to the LYS Podcast. These quick chats are written around an idea that stands out to me that I want to chat with you about. Something that we can discuss in under 15 minutes that will hopefully be as interesting to you as it was to me.

Todays is about how our lives are not one big story, they are made up of a bunch of smaller stories - lots of beginnings, middles, and ends. And I especially want to talk a little about the messy middles.

Tune into the audio for this quick chat that I hope will give a little reprieve if you’re stuck in a messy middle, some hope if you’re at the end of something you didn’t want to end, and maybe some excitement at what new beginnings may be around the corner.

This week I read an email from Mary Alice Arthur, a story practitioner that I had on the show on episode 217 where we talked about “What is the most important story in the world.” Her email really hit home with me and I wanted to share it with you.

Today we’re talking about how we like to think of life as one big story, but in reality life is made up of a bunch of shorter stories - There are new beginnings, new adventures, new experiences, new starts. And there are other stories in our lives that are ending - the end of a project, the end of a job or a relationship, the death of someone or something. But the part I want to talk most about is the MESSY MIDDLE. The messy middle strikes me right now because it’s such an uncomfortable place where we often don’t know what is going to happen next. How will we find our way through? There is a lot of unknown.

One of the ways you can tell you’re in the Messy Middle, Mary Alice says, is that things don’t make sense any more. What you used to do isn’t working. Things feel out of control.

This was comforting to me to acknowledge that confusion may be part of the process of living because I must be in the messy middle of a lot of things. Menopause is upon me and the “me” I used to know is no longer the “me” that is here. My body is weaker, my skin is less resilient, my energy and drive have abandoned me. I’ve been really struggling with not recognizing who I am. Really struggling. So when I read her ideas on the middle, I thought, “Oh, I’m in the messy middle. I don’t know how this is going to turn out because I don’t have it figured out yet. I haven’t figured out hormone adjustments. I haven’t come to grips with a slower self. I haven’t relaxed into acceptance yet. Perhaps it’s not the end of the world as I know it, it’s just the messy middle.”

I’m also at a loss as how to deal with my adult children who are struggling with depression and existential crisis. Nothing I do helps them. I’m at a complete loss and it’s painful. I must be in the messy middle.

We’re looking at a variety of financial investments. The pieces aren’t coming together as fast as I’d like. It’s dragging on. I guess we’re in the messy middle.

Mary Alice asks the question: What do you do when you’re in the messy middle? She suggests that sometimes the best thing to do is simply make a move. Get your hands dirty.

I think this is great advice. I probably like it so much because it gives us power. I have a number of thought quotes at my desk. They say things like: “Yes…and” This saying reminds me that when something happens the best move is simply to acknowledge it and then decide the next best move.

The next sticky note thought on my desk says, “Get curious about new ways of doing things.” The next one says, “Follow your intuition.”

The pattern here is that all these reminders are about taking action. We won’t get any where - we’ll stay exactly where we are if we don’t push on the gas. So push on the gas and steer as corners come up, but just sitting...

How to get a Seat on your Adult Kids’ Board of Directors.

Welcome to the Love Your Story podcast! I’m your host Lori Lee and today we are talking about the complexity and balance of interacting with and influencing our adult children.

My guests today are Emily and Erik Orton, You’ll remember them from Episode 133 - Seven at Sea, where we talked about the year they took their 5 kids and lived on a sail boat.This was one of my all-time favorite episodes because I so loved the things Erik and Emily shared.

I’m very excited to have them back on the show! But I’m also excited because I’m personally having a hard time getting on the board of directors for my adult kids - or in other words, I’m not having a great deal of success having any influence with my adult children. How do they still think I have nothing to share with them….???? What am I doing wrong?

Stay tuned as we get to talk shop with Erik and Emily as they share their expertise they have developed and share through their business The Awesome Factory.

Erik + Emily Orton - Erik is an Emmy Award-winning writer and producer. Emily is an educator, author and public speaker. Their life design framework mutes fear and accelerates growth. They are parents to five kids raised in Manhattan, where Erik worked on such shows as Wicked, Les Miserables and The Phantom of the Opera. When their kids were 6-16 years old, Erik and Emily bootstrapped life aboard a fixer upper sailboat in the Caribbean. They sailed as a family from St. Martin back to New York City. Their memoir about the experience (Seven at Sea) is a New York Times Top 10 Travel book. After life on the boat, they continued to travel the world with their children through Europe, the South Pacific, Africa, and across North and South America in planes, trains, boats and vans. They are the co-founders of The Awesome Factory, a coaching and travel adventure company that leads retreats and sailing adventures all over the world.

Emily and Erik - Welcome back to Love Your Story!

TUNE INTO THE AUDIO DISCUSSION TO HEAR THE THOUGHTS ON THESE AND OTHER IDEAS:

1. Lets start with your story. That introduction gave everyone a super quick look at the adventures of your past decade, but I’d love to have you share some of the highlights you’ve had with your family - particularly those that have helped you build relationship with them in a way that they now give you a place on their board of directors.
2. You coach and direct a great deal regarding empty nesters and dealing with adult children. How did you metamorphose into this space of expertise?
3. Let’s jump right in - I attended an entire evening presentation on this topic, with you, so I know there is lots to talk about. How do we get on our adult kids’ board of directors?
4. What kinds of things do you have coming up and where can people find you?

Finding the Ortons:

Here is the link to The 100 Year Grid:

https://www.theawesomefactory.nyc/100

They tell all about how to use it in episode 18 of their podcast - What Could Go Right?

The 100 Year Grid – How to Visualize Your Whole Life on 1 Sheet of Paper