This time I’m joined by author Cathy Kelly - Cathy is a former journalist whose debut novel, Woman To Woman, became an instant number one bestseller. Since then, she has published 22 novels, which have sold millions of copies globally. She has been a Goodwill Ambassador for UNICEF Ireland since 2005 and has visited many countries to report on UNICEF's work. When not writing with a small dog nestled at her back, she reads voraciously, dances round the kitchen, travels pillion on a motorbike, has a variety of textile art projects on the go and pretends to Marie Kondo the house.

Cathy’s latest novel Sisterhood is - of course - about two sisters - Lou and Toni. Lou is someone who habitually puts herself last…until the events that unfold at her 50th birthday party push her to stop pleasing other people and decide to finally put herself first.

This prompts us to discuss how commonly those of us coming up to 50 are prompted to examine our lives, sometimes interrogating what we have been putting up with and questioning, asking ourselves… “What am I for?”

Cathy also talks about her own treatment for cancer - another life inflection point that makes you question everything…

We move on to talk about the appeal of historical novels and Cathy is kind enough to share a few recommendations for books that she has loved recently: the Cazalet Chronicles by Elizabeth Jane Howard (https://www.panmacmillan.com/blogs/fiction/cazalet-chronicles-books-in-order) and A Discovery of Witches https://deborahharkness.com/all-souls-world-home/the-all-souls-world-books/ (and I mention one of my all time favourite historical novels: https://historicalnovelsociety.org/reviews/the-needle-in-the-blood/)

Cathy calls out the misogyny and snobbishness around fiction written ‘by women, for women, about women’s lives’ and we touch on the evolution of the so-called ‘chick lit’ writers now hitting their 50s and writing about this new age and stage of their lives.

We also head off on a few tangents, reminiscing about carefree pre-Internet times and 80s fashion!

Find out more about Sisterhood at https://harpercollins.co.uk/products/sisterhood-cathy-kelly?variant=40276782973006 - out in hardback now, and in paperback in March 2025…

If you enjoy the podcast and would like to help me keep it running (on a shoestring!) please consider buying me a ‘virtual coffee’ at Ko-fi.com/middlingalong - or you can support me in a non-monetary way by sharing this episode, or writing a short review online!

If your workplace wants to become more ‘menopause friendly’ then please let them know about the work I do at http://www.managingthemenopause.com

You can also find me over on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/middlingalong_podcast/ and https://www.instagram.com/managingthemenopause

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My guest this time is Cindy Gallop - consultant, coach, keynote speaker, and founder of MakeLoveNotPorn. I’ve been a fan of Cindy’s since I first watched the interview on the Style Like U channel that saw her become an older female role model not just to me, but to thousands of women of all ages (and apparently a few men too!). I was also lucky enough to finally meet her in person at the Upfront conference earlier this year where she gave the brilliant closing keynote - I had my own ‘Upfront’ moment asking her to come on the podcast and she graciously agreed.

We talk about the genesis of her sex-tech business MakeLoveNotPorn.tv: a place for ‘socialising, normalising and destigmatising real-world sex’ and Cindy reminds us that when we don’t talk about sex ‘porn becomes sex education by default’... I was fascinated to learn more about MLNP - from the rigorous checking and vetting processes that all content and comments pass through to create safe spaces for all concerned, how empowering and healing many of the ‘stars’ find the process of sharing their videos, to hearing about how hard it is for sex-tech businesses to attract funding (prompting their current round of equity crowdfunding: see https://wefunder.com/makelovenotporn/ if you want to find out more).

For those of us who do have kids, particularly younger children, the ready availability of pornographic content online is a huge concern - Cindy’s next goal is to fund https://www.makelovenotporn.academy/ to create a platform for age-appropriate sex-education for individuals of all ages that will also serve as a way for sex educators to make a living from providing their content (currently most struggle against platforms that censor even educational content). (This: https://www.theguardian.com/society/article/2024/may/27/more-than-300m-children-victims-of-online-sexual-abuse-every-year is the article I refer to in the course of this episode - shocking statistics and a stark reminder that we can’t afford to be complacent in talking to our children about sex, no matter how tricky we may find those conversations. Cindy shares with us her two tips for how to navigate those conversations - advice that I know I’ll definitely find hugely useful.

Last of all we cover ageism in the advertising industry and Cindy’s determination to change societal attitudes towards ageing - creating a culture where ‘living older’ is aspirational and ads are created by and for older audiences and as a result. Music to my ears!

You can find Cindy at https://www.instagram.com/cindygallop and MLNP at https://makelovenotporn.tv/

If you enjoy the podcast and would like to help me keep it running (on a shoestring!) please consider buying me a ‘virtual coffee’ at Ko-fi.com/middlingalong - or you can support me in a non-monetary way by sharing this episode, or writing a short review online!

If your workplace wants to become more ‘menopause friendly’ then please let them know about the work I do at http://www.managingthemenopause.com

You can also find me over on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/middlingalong_podcast/ and https://www.instagram.com/managingthemenopause

Join our newsletter, The Messy Middle, for fortnightly(ish) goodness into your Inbox: https://dashboard.mailerlite.com/forms/323784/90772270045202190/share

We’re delighted to be listed as one of the Top 25 podcasts for midlife and menopause here: https://www.lattelounge.co.uk/podcasts-about-the-menopause/