Hopefully you will find this episode with Marilyn Gardner soul-nourishing!

Host Doreen Cumberford welcomes Marilyn Gardner for a deep dive into the rhythms, challenges, and beauty of leading a global, nomadic life. Marilyn shares her experiences of moving through 36 homes across continents, the lessons found in both anticipation and nostalgia, and the journey of finding "places that light you up", even when you never fully feel that you belong.

Together, Doreen and Marilyn explore what it means to create a sense of home, the balance of looking forward and living in the present, the raw realities of repatriation, and how physical space, community, and personal rituals play into our sense of belonging.

Marilyn provides practical wisdom for listeners who might be struggling to feel “lit up” in their current location, offering advice from her personal toolkit.

Key Discussion Highlights

• The Constant Rhythm of Global Mobility: Marilyn and Doreen reflect on the repetitive cycles of moving, leaving, and adapting to new cultures—but also the subtle grief that comes with each departure.
• Anticipation vs. Presence: The duo discusses the necessity of anticipation in uprooting one’s life, but also the need to avoid “wishing your life away,” learning instead to fully enter the present.
• Repatriation & Loss of Structure: How the predictable cycles of expat life can dissolve when moving “home,” leaving many feeling adrift and forcing a re-creation of rhythm.
• Finding Places that Light You Up: Marilyn shares the story behind her most recent move—to a beloved coastal town in Massachusetts—and the deep peace it brings her after decades of movement.
• Homesickness and Identity: The conversation gets real about the physical and emotional signs of when a place doesn’t align: homesickness, depression, and even weight changes.
• Living Well Where You Don’t Belong: Marilyn provides practical tools for crafting a sense of home: cultivating tolerance for ambiguity, creating special spaces, honoring your story with meaningful objects, and finding “your people.”
• Privilege and Perspective: Gratitude for the privilege of choice and opportunity travel is balanced with an awareness of the millions who are displaced and longing for home.
• Courage in Uprooting: Marilyn honors the tremendous courage it takes to begin again—reminding us, through the metaphor of transplanting a fig tree, that it can take years to bear fruit after a big move.

Practical Takeaways

• Physical Signs to Watch For: If you feel weighed down, restless, or constantly homesick, pay attention—your body and mind may be telling you you’re out of sync with your environment.
• Create Micro-Homes: Surround yourself with objects that reflect your story and bring comfort, no matter where you are.
• Find Your People: Seek out communities or individuals who share your background or who “understand the in-between.”
• Cultivate Gratitude: List three things daily you’re grateful for, and recognize what’s beyond your control.
• Allow Yourself Time: It may take years to feel at home in a new place—just like a transplanted tree, growth takes patience.

Follow Marilyn at: https://www.instagram.com/marilyngard5/

or https://communicatingacrossboundariesblog.com/

Resources Mentioned

• The Art of Travel by Alain de Botton
• The Island of Missing Trees - Elif Shafak
• The Art o

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Home is Where Your Story Crosses Borders!

We aim to inspire expat solutions, by helping you navigate global living with Confidence.

In this episode, Doreen Cumberford welcomes welcomes Mathieu Gagnon, an Adult Third Culture Kid (ATCK) and Professor of Psychology at the Royal Military College in Kingston, Ontario specializing in the emotional experiences of third culture kids (TCKs), expats, and people in global transitions.

Mathieu's international upbringing as the son of a Canadian diplomat took him from Paris to Morocco, the Ivory Coast, Haiti, Switzerland, and back to Canada. Together, they dive deep into the emotional landscape of third culture kids (TCKs): from the privileges and the hidden losses, to the impacts of nostalgia and awe, and how these shape our sense of belonging, well-being, and self-continuity.

Key Topics

• Mathieu’s Third Culture Kid Journey
  • Childhood across multiple continents due to his father's diplomatic career
  • Challenges and privileges of growing up globally
  • Repatriation to Canada and the long road to understanding identity
• TCK Characteristics & Challenges
  • Issues with belonging and identity
  • The deeper, sometimes ineffable sense of rootlessness
  • Hidden losses, grief, and the ongoing process of adaptation
  • Resilience in children and advice for TCK parents: normalize and process complex emotions
• The Power of Nostalgia
  • Nostalgia as a bridge from loss to love
  • Its dual nature: potential to heal or to keep us stuck in the past
  • How nostalgia fosters social connection and builds meaning in life
  • The concept of self-continuity and how nostalgia can reinforce it
• Awe: More Than “Awesome”
  • Definition of awe and its complexity — both positive and terrifying
  • How awe is especially present in the TCK experience due to exposure to vast new environments and cultures
  • The benefits of cultivating awe: increased meaning, social connection, and even physical well-being
  • Awe as a practice for everyone, not just TCKs
• Advice for Parents Raising TCKs
  • Children are highly resilient, but struggle is normal
  • Don’t shy away from talking about the hard things and complex feelings
  • Be open about sadness; allow space to grieve loss and change together

Memorable Quotes

• “Nostalgia is a bridge from loss to love.”
• “Sadness means love… you never feel sad about something you don’t care about.”
• “Awe is a midpoint between deep interest and fascination — and fear.”
• “We get our stories right, and awe and nostalgia help us make sense of this nomadic life.”

Resources

• Contact Mathieu Gagnon: gagnonpsy@gmail.com
• TCK Research Podcast:
• Key Research, Books, and Concepts:
• Third Culture Kids (TCKs): The core theme of the episode, referring to children raised in a culture different from their parents’ and/or the culture of their country of nationality.
• Ruth Van Reken: Referenced as an authority on TCKs and quoted for her insight, "I was encouraged, but never comforted."
• Van Tilburg’s research on nostalgia: Matthieu quotes a phrase from this researcher, "nostalgia is a bridge from loss to love," and mentions recent scholarly work examining
• Doreen Cumberford: Host, author, and global transition expert

Connect with Us:
If you enjoyed this episode, please rate, review, and subscribe! Have a story or a question for us? We’d love to hear from you—message us at Nomadic Diaries.
Sayonara until next time!

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Home is Where Your Story Crosses Borders!

We aim to inspire expat solutions, by helping you navigate global living with Confidence.

Episode Summary: In this insightful episode of Nomadic Diaries, Doreen sits down with Autumn Carolyn—world traveler, writer, and author of Traveling in Wonder—to talk about the realities of moving abroad, the impact of travel on our senses, the power of reflection, and the process of returning home after years overseas.

Autumn shares heartfelt stories from her time living in England and traveling to 30 countries before turning 30, as well as her experience with reverse culture shock and rediscovering a sense of home in Minnesota.

Key Highlights:

• Common Misconceptions About Moving Abroad:
  Autumn discusses the often-overlooked challenges of culture shock, even in English-speaking countries like England, and how simple things (like transportation) can be surprisingly disorienting.
• Travel as a Sensory Experience:
  The chapters in her book are longer for the places she loved most—proof, she says, of how deeply our senses shape our memories.
• The Gift of Noticing:
  Autumn shares her practice of intentional noticing—stopping to ask what she can see, hear, and smell in a moment—which amplifies the vividness of her experiences abroad and, she says, increases peace and presence.
• Goals vs. Growth:
  While her “30 countries by 30” goal kept her moving, Autumn explains that the true value lies not in the numbers but in the transformative experiences and self-growth that travel brings.
• On Reflection and Empathy:
  Keeping a journal helped her process and find deeper meaning in her travels. She describes how living in different cultures has made her more empathetic and skilled at connecting with people from all backgrounds.
• Reverse Culture Shock:
  Autumn is candid about the challenges of coming home—missing the friends and routines from abroad, sharing memories with those who weren't there, and grappling with the urge to get back on a plane.
• Advice for Aspiring Travelers:
  She encourages listeners to start with “bite-sized adventures”—whether that’s exploring a new grocery store or a nearby town—especially if international travel feels daunting.

Where to Find Autumn’s Book:

• https://www.youtube.com/autumncarolynnphotography
• www.autumncarolynn.com
• https://www.facebook.com/autumncarolynnphotography
• https://www.instagram.com/autumncarolynnphotography

Connect with Us:
If you enjoyed this episode, please rate, review, and subscribe! Have a story or a question for us? We’d love to hear from you—message us at Nomadic Diaries.

Sayonara until next time!

Support the show

Home is Where Your Story Crosses Borders!

We aim to inspire expat solutions, by helping you navigate global living with Confidence.

I sat down with Linda Mueller, who was a previous Co-Host for the Re-Entry Series. Linda is an experienced ExpatPartnerCoach and we dived into the benefits of coaching for people who live in the international and global communities.

Together, we explored what it really means to thrive as a global nomad, especially as an accompanying partner. We cover everything from wrestling with issues of purpose and identity to maintaining relationships and overcoming guilt. Linda shares her hard-earned wisdom and actionable tips for navigating life across borders through coaching.

Key Topics Covered:

• Why High-Achievers Need Coaches Too
  • Even the most accomplished expats can feel “stuck” or in transition, and coaching can be both a lifeline and a proactive tool for growth and clarity.
• Overcoming Resistance to Coaching
  • Linda discusses building trust, offering a safe, non-judgmental space, and the importance of vulnerability for clients who may shy away from coaching.
• The Real Pressures on Expat Partners
  • From managing expectations back home to redefining purpose, the accompanying spouse’s journey is uniquely demanding and often misunderstood.
• Coping Strategies for Expats
  • Practical tips like setting healthy routines, taking small steps for momentum, and practicing self-kindness can be powerful tools during challenging times.
• Identity, Home, and Belonging
  • The conversation delves into how expats define “home,” manage the feeling of being in liminal spaces, and foster a sense of belonging and connection.
• Technology & Global Coaching
  • Linda explains how technology has transformed coaching for global nomads, making support more flexible, connected, and accessible than ever before.
• Coaching vs. Therapy: What's the Difference?
  • Linda outlines the distinction between coaching (action-oriented, future-focused) and therapy (healing from the past), and emphasizes the importance of working with certified professionals.
• When to Seek a Coach
  • The best time? Whether you’re in crisis, stuck in a rut, or planning a big transition, coaching is for both the reactive and the proactive expat or nomad.

Notable Quotes:

• “Sometimes people don’t even know where they want to go...I give them the confidence that I can sort of build this container, this environment, so they can express themselves.” — Linda Mueller
• “A lot of times we feel like we’re the only one. We feel lonely, we feel isolated. But there really are other people out there.” — Linda Mueller
• “Therapy is like archaeology...coaching is like architecture.” — Doreen Cumberford

Connect with Linda at:

https://www.theexpatpartnercoach.com/

Thanks for lending us your ears! Please share this podcast with another expat or nomad!

https://www.nomadicdiariespodcast.com/
https://www.amazon.com/Life-Camel-Lane-Embrace-Adventure/dp/0578607352
www.doreenmcumberford.com

Support the show

Home is Where Your Story Crosses Borders!

We aim to inspire expat solutions, by helping you navigate global living with Confidence.

In this episode, we sat down again with Tanya Crossman, a leading expert on Third Culture Kids (TCKs) to catch up on recent research findings.

Understanding Third Culture Kids

• Defining the TCK Journey: Tanya clarifies what makes a Third Culture Kid—children growing up outside their passport country without plans to settle permanently—and why their experience differs from immigrant children.
• Hidden Struggles, Global Strengths: How TCKs develop unique perspectives while navigating complex identity formations that many parents and educators miss.

Groundbreaking Research Revelations

• Data-Driven Insights: Discover findings from Tanya's landmark study of 1,900+ TCKs that challenge conventional wisdom about cross-cultural childhoods.
• The ACE Factor: Learn how Adverse Childhood Experiences appear at higher rates in TCK populations and what this means for their development and wellbeing.

What Shapes TCK Experiences

• The Sector Effect: Why a child's expatriate community (missionary, diplomatic, military, corporate) influences outcomes more powerfully than nationality or host country.
• Digital Natives, Global Lives: How today's tech-connected TCKs manage unprecedented pressure to maintain relationships across continents—and the surprising impact on their present-moment engagement.

Practical Support Strategies

• Navigating Transition & Grief: Actionable approaches for parents to help children process loss, including Tanya's insights on using tools like "The Grief Tower."
• Permission to Feel: Creating spaces where TCKs can express difficult emotions without judgment or minimization.

The Evolving TCK Landscape

• New Pioneers: How global schoolers and digital nomad families are rewriting the TCK script—often without traditional institutional support.
• Bridging the Gap: TCK Training's initiatives to reach underserved global families with research-based resources.

The TCK Advantage:

• Resilience Research: Despite facing unique challenges, discover why 98% of TCKs wouldn't change their upbringing.
• Protective Factors: The specific positive childhood experiences that help TCKs thrive despite higher adversity rates.

Memorable Quotes

• "The majority of TCKs like the way they grew up… 98% said they would not take this back if they could." Tanya Crossman
• "When we talk about hard things, we give kids who are struggling the opportunity to talk. When we don't, we make them feel like they can't share what they're struggling with."
• "It's not culture alone that shapes a TCK—it's the combination of mobility, community, and how adults respond to their unique challenges."

Essential Resources

• Books:
  • Misunderstood: The Impact of Growing Up Overseas in the 21st Century by Tanya Crossman
  • The Grief Tower by Lauren Wells
  • What Made That Feel So Hard? by Lauren Wells

• Websites:
  • TCK Training (featuring freely accessible research)
  • https://www.tcktraining.com
  • https://www.instagram.com/tcktraining/
  • https://www.youtube.com/@tcktraining9213
  • https://www.link

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Home is Where Your Story Crosses Borders!

We aim to inspire expat solutions, by helping you navigate global living with Confidence.

In this episode of Nomadic Diaries, we sat down with Tanya Crossman, a leading expert on Third Culture Kids (TCKs) whose personal experiences and professional work have made her a trusted voice in the global mobility community.

Tanya's Third Culture Journey

Tanya Crossman's journey as a TCK began with moves between Australia and the United States during her childhood, following her father's career path. Her cross-cultural experiences deepened significantly when she later spent 13 years living and working in China. These formative experiences across different continents gave her unique insights into the TCK experience that would later inform her professional work and writing.

Finding Community Among the Misunderstood

After years of feeling like an outsider in her own culture, Tanya discovered the profound relief of finding others who shared similar experiences. This revelation became the foundation of her life's work, as captured in her powerful quote: "I'm not alone has become a mantra for so much of the work that I do."

Defining the Third Culture Experience

Tanya brings clarity to what it means to be a Third Culture Kid, addressing common misconceptions and explaining that the "third culture" isn't a specific place but rather the shared experience of growing up among different cultural worlds. She explores how TCKs develop a unique cultural identity that combines elements from their passport culture, host cultures, and the expatriate community itself.

Emotional Intelligence and TCK Challenges

One of the most valuable insights Tanya shares is how the TCK experience can affect emotional development:

• A tendency toward emotional suppression as a survival mechanism during frequent transitions
• How this suppression can hinder the development of healthy conflict resolution skills
• The importance of creating safe spaces for TCKs to process complex emotions about mobility, identity, and belonging

Guidance for Parents and Caregivers

Tanya offers practical wisdom for parents raising children across cultures:

• The importance of preventive care rather than crisis intervention
• Creating environments where emotions can be expressed safely and processed
• Understanding that TCKs are "growing up in a completely different world than you are"
• Recognizing the unique challenges and opportunities that come with a globally mobile childhood

Resources for the TCK Journey

Tanya highlights the growing body of resources available to support TCKs and their families:

• Her book, "Misunderstood," which explores common threads in TCK experiences
• "Third Culture Kids: Growing Up Among Worlds" (often called the TCK Bible)
• Practical tools for parents, educators, and caregivers working with globally mobile children

Connect with Tanya

For more resources on supporting Third Culture Kids:

• Personal website: tanyacrossman.com
• TCK Training: tcktraining.com

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Home is Where Your Story Crosses Borders!

We aim to inspire expat solutions, by helping you navigate global living with Confidence.

In this engaging episode of "Nomadic Diaries," host Doreen Cumberford sits down with Marilyn Gardner—a seasoned author and expat who has spent her life living across multiple countries.

They dive into the essence of rituals and faith and how these elements intertwine with the nomadic lifestyle. Marilyn shares vivid memories from her childhood in Pakistan and discusses how these early experiences shaped her spiritual journey and everyday rituals.

Key Topics Covered

• Introduction to Marilyn Gardner: Doreen highlights Marilyn's extensive experience as an expat and repatriator, noting her impactful writing and authentic journey.
• Life in Pakistan: Marilyn opens up about her early memories in the Himalayas, growing up sleeping under mosquito nets, and the profound impact of the call to prayer in her childhood.
• Rituals and Faith: The discussion centers around how Marilyn's upbringing in a Muslim-majority country influenced her Christian faith, leading her to embrace Eastern Orthodox Christianity, which shares similar ritualistic patterns with Islam.
• Family Stories and Connection: Family stories were emphasized as being significant for resilience, illustrating the importance of connecting personal narratives across generations.
• The Great Big Family Chat: Marilyn shares how this virtual family connection became pivotal during the COVID pandemic, keeping family members emotionally close despite physical distances.
• Reflections on Grief and Death Rituals: The impact of cultural mourning practices on personal healing was discussed, particularly how certain rituals can fill the emotional void left by grief.
• Spiritual Resilience Across Cultures: Doreen and Marilyn reflect on how engaging with different faiths and cultures can enhance one's spiritual resilience and enrich our personal belief systems.

Find Marilyn at https://communicatingacrossboundariesblog.com/

Why Nomadic Diaries?
Expats, nomads, global citizens, lend us your ears! We come not merely to share travel tales, but to reveal the profound journeys of those navigating life between worlds. Through Nomadic Diaries, discover how extraordinary individuals transform geographical transitions into powerful paths of self-discovery. Let this be your compass in the complex terrain of global mobility.

https://www.nomadicdiariespodcast.com/
https://www.amazon.com/Life-Camel-Lane-Embrace-Adventure/dp/0578607352
www.doreenmcumberford.com

Please support the show by commenting, liking or sharing with another expat or nomad!

Support the show

Home is Where Your Story Crosses Borders!

We aim to inspire expat solutions, by helping you navigate global living with Confidence.

In this episode of Nomadic Diaries, Doreen interviews Kirtika van Hunen-Malla who shares her experiences of living across cultures and how Eastern philosophies have shaped her understanding of international living. Here are some key highlights from their conversation:

1. Background & Cross-Cultural Upbringing:
   • Kirtika grew up with a unique blend of Indian and Nepali cultures, which provided her with a rich cultural perspective even before moving to the West.
2. Eastern Philosophical Influence:
   • Kirtika discusses how the Eastern approach to life, focusing on acceptance and adaptability, has helped her navigate different cultural environments with less conflict.
3. Intercultural Marriage:
   • She shares insights from her intercultural marriage with her Dutch husband, emphasizing the importance of understanding different communication rhythms and pacing.
4. Culture and Self-Awareness:
   • A significant part of the discussion revolves around the idea that understanding culture starts with self-awareness and knowing one's core identity.
5. Code Switching:
   • Kirtika explains the concept of code switching and how it can be a valuable tool for adapting between cultures without losing one's identity.
6. Professional Cross-Cultural Misconceptions:
   • They talk about common misunderstandings in cross-cultural communication and the importance of providing newcomers with an understanding of local cultural norms.
7. Wisdom from Eastern Philosophies:
   • Kirtika stresses the importance of self-awareness and the art of responding rather than reacting, which she believes is rooted in Eastern philosophies.
8. World Citizenship:
   • Kirtika shares her perception of being a world citizen and how it involves feeling at home anywhere and embracing a global heartedness.
9. Lightning Round:
   • Fun quickfire questions reveal Kirtika's desire to learn Italian and her love for the idea of feeling at home wherever her heart resides.
10. When Cultures Meet:

• Kirtika introduces her book, "When Cultures Meet," which compiles years of research and anecdotes to help people navigate cultural differences in professional settings.

The episode concludes with a key takeaway from Kirtika:

"Know thyself and stand strong in your personal identity to effectively engage in intercultural interactions."

Thanks for lending us your ears!

https://www.nomadicdiariespodcast.com/
https://www.amazon.com/Life-Camel-Lane-Embrace-Adventure/dp/0578607352
www.doreenmcumberford.com

Please support the show:

Support the show

Home is Where Your Story Crosses Borders!

We aim to inspire expat solutions, by helping you navigate global living with Confidence.