Episodes

  • Walking Down Memory Lane: Nostalgia, Humor, and Absurdity
    Nov 20 2024
    In this delightful and laugh-out-loud episode of The Absurdists, co-hosts Mary Murphy and Marlo Anderson take us on a whimsical stroll through the past. Together, they explore a variety of once-popular phenomena and inventions, rating them as either “Baby, Come Back” or “Forget About It.” Prepare yourself for an entertaining blend of nostalgia, absurdity, and quirky insights as the duo dissects bygone cultural staples and ponders their place in today’s world. Highlights from the Episode: The Ingenious Pet Rock Mary and Marlo kick things off with a deep dive into the pet rock phenomenon. From googly eyes to DIY versions, they ponder the rock's utility as the ultimate low-maintenance pet—and a hilarious fallback gift for awkward social situations. Would the pet rock be a hit if it made a comeback today? Mary’s verdict? “Baby, Come Back.” Drive-In Theaters: Nostalgia on Four Wheels Remember drive-in theaters? Marlo shares tales of cramming friends into car trunks to save a few bucks, while Mary recalls the questionable sound quality and lumpy French fries. Though it stirs up fond memories, both hosts ultimately agree this one is a “Forget About It.” Cigarette Vending Machines The duo reminisces about the ubiquity of cigarette vending machines in the mid-20th century. With no ID checks, these machines were a fixture in laundromats and grocery stores. The absurdity of their unregulated accessibility leads both hosts to give this relic a firm “Forget About It.” Soda Jerks and Custom Beverages Marlo fondly recounts his encounters with soda jerks, the original mixologists who crafted fizzy drinks from syrups and soda water. Mary, intrigued by this bygone experience, votes “Baby, Come Back,” envisioning a revival of soda fountains in nostalgic eateries. The Great VHS vs. Betamax Debate The rivalry between VHS and Betamax gets the absurdist treatment as Marlo reveals an unexpected twist: the porn industry’s pivotal role in VHS’s victory. While the higher quality of Betamax impressed professionals, its inability to adapt to the home recording market sealed its fate. Waterbeds: A Sloshy Sleep Saga Waterbeds were a sensation in the 70s and 80s, but their leaks, high maintenance, and the infamous patch kits made them more trouble than they were worth. Despite their nostalgic charm, both Mary and Marlo agree they’re better left in the past. Dial-Up Modems: The Internet’s Awkward Teenage Years Nothing screams early internet like the screeching tones of a dial-up modem. Mary and Marlo hilariously recount the agony of losing a connection when someone picked up the phone. Nostalgic? Yes. But neither wants to relive those frustrating days. Verdict? “Forget About It.” Milk Delivery: Then and Now While the traditional image of a milkman in a white uniform may no longer exist, modern-day milk delivery services still thrive in some communities. Both hosts celebrate its evolution, voting “Baby, Come Back.” Phone Booths: Privacy, Please Marlo and Mary debate the merits of phone booths, with Marlo highlighting their nostalgic charm and Mary dreaming of modern “cone of silence” booths for noisy public phone users. The verdict remains mixed, but Mary’s vision for their revival feels more relevant than ever. MySpace: The Social Media OG In a heartfelt closing, Mary declares her undying love for the original MySpace, reminiscing about its customizable pages and band promotions. She proudly states, “I will die on this hill: Baby, Come Back.” Takeaway This episode is a love letter to the absurdities of the past and the quirks of human innovation. Whether reminiscing about soda jerks or cringing at the thought of waterbeds, Mary and Marlo guide us through a delightful mix of history and hilarity. Join The Absurdists for this nostalgic journey, and don’t forget to share your own “Baby, Come Back” or “Forget About It” moments in the comments. Stay absurd!
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    1 hr and 2 mins
  • The Most Absurd World Records You Never Knew Existed
    Nov 1 2024
    The Most Absurd World Records You Never Knew Existed Ever wonder who holds the record for balancing a running lawnmower on their chin? Neither had we, until this week's episode. Marlo and Mary dove headfirst into the weird world of record-breaking achievements, and folks, it's even stranger than we imagined. Did You Know People PAY to Break Records? Before we get into the truly bizarre stuff, here's something that blew our minds: people actually pay thousands of dollars to have their record attempts certified. That's right – somebody paid actual money to have someone watch them stack M&Ms. Speaking of which... Seven M&Ms: The Stack That Shocked Mary When Mary confessed she couldn't even stack two M&Ms, we knew we were in for a treat. The current record? Seven M&Ms stacked on top of each other. No glue, no tricks, just pure M&M-stacking dedication. As Mary put it, "I can't get two to stay on top of each other. I can't imagine anything more than that!" The T-Shirt Champion of Ontario Picture wearing 260 t-shirts at once. Now picture paying someone to watch you do it. Ted Hastings from Ontario did exactly that, requiring special order shirts up to size 20XL. His description? "Generally awful." But hey, he raised $11,000 for a playground, so we'll call that a win! High Heels at High Speed Remember Usain Bolt's 100-meter sprint record of 9.58 seconds? Now imagine running that same distance in stilettos. Someone did it in 12.82 seconds – just 3.24 seconds slower than Bolt's record. Mary's response? "I'm already in pain just thinking about it." Other Mind-Bending Records We Covered: A man who broke 51 watermelons with his head in one minute 125 scoops of ice cream balanced on a single cone Fingernails measuring almost 43 feet combined Breaking 46 wooden toilet seats with your head in 60 seconds (because... why not?) The Stories Behind the Strange What makes these records truly fascinating isn't just the bizarre achievements – it's the stories behind them. From a teacher's scolding leading to 66 years of nail growth to a tribute to a lost loved one, these seemingly absurd accomplishments often have surprisingly touching origins. Want to Break a Record with The Absurdists? We're cooking up something special. Marlo and Mary are contemplating setting their own world record with our listeners. Stay tuned for what might be the most absurd group achievement yet! Keep it Absurd As Marlo always says, "Stay Absurd, Everybody!" And if you're thinking about breaking any of these records, maybe start with stacking two M&Ms before moving on to the running lawnmower balancing act. Listen to the full episode on your favorite podcast platform, and don't forget to follow us for more weekly doses of absurdity. Fun Fact: During the recording of this episode, Marlo revealed he holds four world records himself – though thankfully none involve balancing lawn equipment on any body parts!
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    33 mins
  • From Big Macs to Bless You: Laughing Through the World’s Weird Rituals
    Oct 24 2024
    In this latest episode of The Absurdists, Marlo Anderson and Mary Murphy dive headfirst into the hilariously quirky world of human rituals, customs, and behaviors that, at a closer look, seem utterly absurd. With their characteristic wit, the duo unravels the strange ways people engage with everyday customs and habits that many of us take for granted, prompting laughter, reflection, and perhaps a little confusion along the way. The Great "Bless You" Debate The episode begins with a deep dive into the peculiar practice of saying “bless you” when someone sneezes. Marlo and Mary muse over why sneezes, and not coughs or yawns, earn this special acknowledgment. The pair uncovers the bizarre history of this ritual, tracing it back to ancient beliefs, where sneezing was thought to release spirits from the body, requiring a blessing to ward off evil. Mary shares how, even now, the custom persists globally, yet the logic behind it has long been lost to time. Marlo’s take? He wonders whether society would feel just as compelled to offer blessings if someone hiccupped or burped in public. Together, the hosts laugh at the oddity of such arbitrary social expectations, which shape behaviors we follow without second thought. Holding Doors: A Chivalry Conundrum Marlo recounts an awkward moment during his recent trip to London, where his attempt at politeness—holding a door open for strangers—was met with unexpected criticism. This moment triggers a larger conversation about the nuances of politeness and courtesy. The duo debates when it’s appropriate to hold a door, and how some cultures view these small acts of kindness differently. They discuss how politeness can sometimes backfire, turning an intended good deed into an uncomfortable social faux pas. Mary reflects on times when she felt awkward holding doors too long or when someone hurried awkwardly to avoid being “inconvenient.” The conversation naturally meanders into how different regions of the world handle common courtesy, with humorous stories peppered throughout. The Awkward Etiquette of Elevators Few things in modern life are as awkward as standing in an elevator with strangers, and Marlo and Mary fully explore this phenomenon. Should you strike up a conversation or pretend everyone else doesn’t exist? They laugh over the unwritten rules of elevator etiquette, where eye contact becomes taboo, and everyone instinctively turns to their phones to avoid interaction. Mary shares a story of a particularly lively elevator ride she once took in Las Vegas, where an impromptu conversation broke the unspoken rule of silence. Meanwhile, Marlo marvels at how such a small, confined space can amplify social anxiety and awkwardness. Crickets and Tequila: A Crunchy Cultural Experience Mary introduces listeners to her most recent culinary adventure in Mexico, where she participated in a tequila tasting that came with an unusual snack: crickets. Describing the experience with her signature humor, she shares how the tequila made the crunchy insects more palatable, although she warns listeners about the surprising challenge of dealing with tiny legs and antennae that stubbornly stick between your teeth. Marlo can’t resist chiming in, pondering the rise of edible insects in Western culture and playfully imagining future food trends. Could crickets become the new potato chips? The thought alone is absurd enough to warrant a chuckle. Absurd Reflections on Everyday Behavior The episode wraps up with reflections on how rituals and customs, from saying “bless you” to awkward elevator silences, shape human behavior. Marlo and Mary leave listeners with an invitation to embrace the absurdity of life and find humor in everyday interactions. Whether it’s holding a door, munching on crickets, or nodding politely in an elevator, these small moments remind us that life is full of quirks worth celebrating. Highlights from Episode 12: The Origins of “Bless You”: Sneezing and its strang...
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    Less than 1 minute
  • Unraveling the Absurd: Exploring 10 Mind-Bending Conspiracy Theories
    Oct 9 2024
    Are birds watching us? The Absurdists investigate! Birds Aren't Real: Government Drones in Disguise? One of the first conspiracy theories discussed is the internet-born idea that birds are actually government surveillance drones. According to this theory, all birds were replaced by mechanical lookalikes in the 1950s. Our hosts humorously point out the existence of ornithology and the impracticality of such a massive undertaking. "If these are drones," Mary quips, "they've missed a critical feature – stopping the robotic birds from pooping on us!" The Denver International Airport: An Illuminati Headquarters? The podcast explores the conspiracy surrounding Denver International Airport, alleged to be a secret base for the Illuminati. Marlo and Mary discuss: Unusual murals and underground facilities Connections to nearby military installations Prevalence of similar symbolism in older U.S. buildings "It's fascinating how everyday places can become the center of such elaborate theories," Marlo observes. Hollow Earth Theory: A Hidden World Beneath Our Feet? Our hosts tackle the Hollow Earth theory, which suggests that entire civilizations exist beneath the Earth's surface. They examine: Scientific impossibilities of a hollow planet Alleged UFO exits through the poles Humorous considerations of logistics for subterranean societies Mary jokes, "If the Earth is hollow, where does all the magma for volcanoes come from? A really big Instant Pot?" Celebrity Conspiracy: Was Paul McCartney Replaced? The long-standing theory that Paul McCartney died in 1966 and was replaced by a lookalike gets a thorough examination. Key points include: Analysis of supposed clues in Beatles albums Humorous observations about the "doppelganger's" successful career Speculation about DNA testing to resolve the mystery "If it's true," Marlo laughs, "the replacement Paul has had an even more impressive career than the original!" Chemtrails: Weather Control or Population Manipulation? The episode concludes with a discussion on chemtrails, the belief that airplane contrails are actually chemical agents used for nefarious purposes. Marlo and Mary explore: The science behind contrails Logistical challenges of a global chemtrail operation Critical thinking about the theory's plausibility "If chemtrails were real," Mary ponders, "wouldn't the people spraying them be affected too?" The Psychology Behind Conspiracy Theories While The Absurdists approach these theories with humor, they also delve into why people believe in conspiracy theories. Some reasons include: The desire for control and certainty in an uncertain world The need to feel special or privy to secret information Distrust in authorities and institutions As Marlo notes, "Understanding why people believe in conspiracy theories can help us approach these discussions with empathy." Conclusion: Critical Thinking in the Age of Information The Absurdists remind listeners that while it's fun to explore outlandish ideas, it's crucial to approach information with a balance of curiosity and skepticism. By examining conspiracy theories, we can sharpen our critical thinking skills and better navigate the complex information landscape of the modern world. "At the end of the day," Mary concludes, "it's about asking questions, seeking evidence, and not being afraid to change our minds when presented with new information." Stay tuned for future episodes of The Absurdists, where Marlo and Mary continue to explore the strange, silly, and downright absurd aspects of our world! Further Reading: The Psychology of Conspiracy Theories Critical Thinking in the Internet Age The Absurdists Podcast Official Website
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    1 hr and 12 mins
  • Absurd Nursery Rhymes – Unraveling the Dark Origins of Childhood Favorites
    Oct 2 2024
    In Episode 10 of The Absurdists, Marlo Anderson and Mary Murphy take listeners on a journey into the absurdity of beloved childhood nursery rhymes. But this time, they’re not just recalling the catchy tunes from our youth—they’re digging deep into the surprisingly dark and twisted origins of these innocent-sounding jingles. Exploring the Dark Side of Nursery Rhymes From Humpty Dumpty’s tragic fall to the grim reality behind “Ring Around the Rosie,” nursery rhymes have far more sinister histories than their playful melodies suggest. Marlo and Mary explore how these stories, often passed down through generations, hold dark tales about royalty, plague, and even unwanted pregnancies. Yes, you read that right—an unexpected twist to the cheery rhymes we've been singing for ages. Humpty Dumpty’s Hidden Meaning Starting off with Humpty Dumpty, Marlo and Mary don’t just stop at the iconic line of the great fall. The hosts peel back the layers of the rhyme and reveal its deep ties to royal history and a dark political metaphor about King Richard III. This perspective is not only eye-opening but also a little chilling when considering how we sing it so casually to children. Jack and Jill’s Grief-Stricken End The hosts then move on to Jack and Jill, a seemingly harmless rhyme about fetching a pail of water. But beneath the surface, it hides a tragic tale of an unwanted pregnancy and a fatal fall. With their trademark absurdist humor, Marlo and Mary breathe new life into the rhyme, making listeners question everything they thought they knew about this famous duo. The Absurdity of “Ring Around the Rosie” Possibly one of the most well-known nursery rhymes, “Ring Around the Rosie” is filled with coded references to the Black Plague. In this episode, the hosts break down the rhyme, explaining how its cheery exterior masks a grim reality of death, ashes, and survival during one of Europe’s darkest times. A New Take on Mother Goose Marlo and Mary finish off the episode with some fun musings about reimagining these rhymes through an absurdist lens. Could they create their own modern-day versions of Mother Goose? They certainly think so, leaving listeners wondering what bizarre nursery rhymes the duo could come up with next. What’s Next? As always, Marlo and Mary leave listeners in suspense for next week’s episode, promising more absurdity and laughter. If nursery rhymes weren’t enough to blow your mind, stay tuned for even more deep dives into the most ridiculous and strange topics only The Absurdists can deliver. Catch the full episode and more on The Absurdists, and don’t forget to subscribe to keep the absurdity alive!
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    1 hr and 9 mins
  • The Absurdities of Travel, Doors, and… Crickets?
    Sep 20 2024
    In this hilariously absurd episode of The Absurdists, hosts Marlo Anderson and Mary Murphy take us on a whimsical journey through their recent experiences and quirky observations. Marlo shares stories from his recent travels to London and Paris, offering a unique perspective on everything from international McDonald’s menus to cross-cultural miscommunications. The episode kicks off with Marlo’s adventures in Europe, where he had a run-in with the famed Chicken Big Mac, but the real fun starts when he discusses his perplexing experiences with common courtesy. Is chivalry dead? Well, Marlo certainly feels like it might be, after opening doors for strangers in London, only to be berated for his kindness. The duo explores the awkward nuances of human interactions, such as when it's appropriate to hold a door open and how people react to simple gestures of politeness. The discussion then takes a dive into one of life’s great mysteries: Why do we say “bless you” when someone sneezes but not when they cough? Mary uncovers the fascinating origins of this centuries-old tradition, revealing an unexpected link to pagan beliefs. As always, the pair’s humorous banter makes even the history of sneezing a laugh-out-loud moment. But the absurdity doesn’t stop there! Marlo and Mary also tackle the curious dilemma of elevator etiquette. Do you engage with strangers or pretend they don’t exist? And why does striking up a conversation in an elevator feel more absurd in some cultures than in others? They share funny stories from their travels and dissect the bizarre nature of human behavior in these confined spaces. The episode wraps up with a surprising twist when Mary reveals her recent foray into trying crickets – yes, you read that right – during a tequila tasting in Mexico. Who knew crickets could taste like pistachios? But beware of the legs and antennae that get stuck in your teeth! If you’ve ever wondered about the culinary delights of insect-eating or are simply curious to hear how tequila can make even crickets taste good, this episode is for you. Highlights from Episode 9: Marlo’s London & Paris Adventures: From Chicken Big Macs to door-holding mishaps. Cultural Differences in Courtesy: When does holding the door open turn into an absurdity? The History of “Bless You”: A surprising look into the pagan roots of this common phrase. Elevator Etiquette: Should we engage, ignore, or just look at our phones? Mary Eats Crickets: A tequila-fueled adventure in Mexico, complete with crunchy snacks. Whether you're looking for a good laugh, a quirky travel story, or just want to hear the latest absurdities from Marlo and Mary, this episode has it all! Tune in now to The Absurdists Episode 9 and embrace the absurd with us!
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    1 hr and 5 mins
  • The Absurd Things That People Collect
    Sep 16 2024
    Hey there, folks! Marlo Anderson here, and boy, do I have a doozy of an episode to share with you. This week on The Absurdists, Mary and I took a deep dive into some of the craziest collections you've ever heard of. I mean, we're not talking about your run-of-the-mill stamp collections here - we're talking about the kind of stuff that'll make you go, "Wait, what?" First off, we've got this guy who's collected over 500 traffic cones. Can you imagine? I joked with Mary that he's got enough to close off a small city street! And get this - he calls himself "Cone Man the Barbarian." I love it! Then there's this lady who's got over 21,000 banana labels. Yeah, you heard that right - those little stickers on bananas. Mary filled me in on how there's all sorts of info coded on those things. Who knew? But wait, it gets weirder. We're talking belly button lint collections, air sickness bags, and even - I kid you not - fossilized feces. I told Mary I'd display that right next to my chickens in the office. (By the way, if anyone's thinking of getting me a gift, I've got plenty of chickens now, thanks!) Mary shared her aversion to collections of dolls and anything with faces. Me? I accidentally started a metal art collection in my front yard. Life's funny that way, isn't it? We even hatched a plan to help out an air sickness bag collector. So if you're flying soon, maybe grab an extra bag and send it our way. We'll make sure it gets to the right place! You know, as absurd as some of these collections sound, you've got to admire the passion these folks have. It just goes to show, there's a collector for everything under the sun. So, what's the weirdest thing you've ever collected? Drop us a line and let us know. And hey, if you're ever in North Dakota, swing by and check out my metal art "collection." Just don't expect any fossilized feces - I draw the line somewhere! Catch you next week for another wild ride on The Absurdists. It's gonna be a hoot!
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    30 mins
  • Absurd Warning Labels That Defy Logic
    Sep 4 2024
    Have you ever picked up a product and burst out laughing at its warning label? You're not alone! In a recent episode of The Absurdists, hosts Marlo Anderson and Mary Murphy took a deep dive into the world of the most bizarre and downright absurd warning labels ever slapped onto consumer products. Buckle up (but not in your wheelbarrow) as we take you on a wild ride through some of the most head-scratching cautionary notes out there! Don't Take Your Wheelbarrow on the Highway! Imagine cruising down the interstate, wind in your hair, sun on your face... pushing a wheelbarrow? Believe it or not, some manufacturers felt the need to warn against using wheelbarrows on highways. One can only wonder what series of events led to this particular piece of advice. Perhaps someone tried to hitch their wheelbarrow to the back of their car for a cross-country move? Beauty Sleep or Blow-Dried Disaster? We all want to look our best, but at what cost? Apparently, some folks needed to be reminded that using a hair dryer while sleeping is not a great idea. Our hosts had a field day imagining scenarios where someone might think this was a brilliant solution for staying warm in bed. Spoiler alert: it's not! Chainsaws: Handle with Care (and Common Sense) In a shocking revelation, it turns out that holding the wrong end of a chainsaw can be dangerous. Who knew? Marlo and Mary couldn't help but ponder the series of life choices that would lead someone to need this particular warning. Remember, folks: the part with the teeth? That's the business end! No Pets in the Microwave, Please! Just when you thought you'd heard it all, along comes a warning label advising against drying pets in the microwave. Mary's reaction to this bombshell was priceless, as she grappled with the idea that such a warning was necessary. Let's all agree to stick to towels for our furry friends, shall we? Sorry, Superman, You Can't Actually Fly In a blow to superhero enthusiasts everywhere, some Superman costumes come with a reminder that wearers cannot actually fly. Our hosts wondered if other superhero costumes might need similar reality checks. "Warning: Wearing this Spider-Man costume does not grant you the ability to shoot webs from your wrists." The Hot Topic of Ironing Ever been in such a rush that you considered ironing your clothes while wearing them? No? Well, someone out there must have, because there's a warning label for that! Marlo and Mary had a good chuckle imagining the convenience versus the excruciating pain of attempting such a feat. Other Gems from the World of Warnings The absurdity doesn't stop there. Our intrepid hosts uncovered a treasure trove of ridiculous labels, including: Night-all sleeping pills that warn they might cause drowsiness (You don't say!) Toilet brushes not intended for personal hygiene (We'll let you ponder that one) Stay Absurd, Stay Safe As Marlo and Mary wrapped up their laughter-filled exploration of warning label lunacy, they left us with an important reminder: keep your eyes peeled for the absurd in everyday life. You never know when you might stumble upon a warning label that defies all logic and common sense. So the next time you're about to use a product, take a moment to read the label. You might just find yourself chuckling at the lengths manufacturers go to protect us from ourselves – and maybe, just maybe, you'll learn not to use your hairdryer as a bedtime companion. Stay tuned for more absurdity, and remember: when in doubt, don't microwave your pets! Want more laughs? Catch full episodes of The Absurdists at theabsurdistsshow.com and follow Marlo and Mary on social media for your daily dose of the ridiculous!
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    30 mins