We’ve all been there. Stuck, unmotivated, and unsure of what to do or where to go next. And just as we’ve struggled, we’ve also had to help others who can’t seem to move forward. Whether you’re a leader, manager, mentor, or just someone who wants to be more effective in tough conversations, knowing how to cut through resistance is a critical skill.

People don’t just fear failure, they fear success. Staying stuck, or just refusing to advance, feels safer than the prospect of higher expectations and the weight of added responsibility.

People are complicated, and it’s not as simple as offering advice or motivation. Different personalities bring different sources of resistance, and pushing too hard, or in the wrong way, can backfire.

So how do you actually help? How do you guide someone toward action without overwhelming them? In this episode, we break down the principles of managing these interactions so you can help them get out of their own way without getting stuck yourself.

In this practical episode, Brett covers:

• How to distill and discern why they feel stuck
• Scripts for open-ended questions that foster agency and self-discovery
• A framework for building a plan focused on securing the small wins first
• Tools to build and sustain momentum–and when to check in
• Why the victim mindset is so destructive and how to set boundaries to protect yourself

SPEAKER SCHOOL – Are you someone who struggles with social anxiety? How about pitching more effectively in meetings? Maybe you’re already on a speaker circuit but looking to sharpen your next message? Speaker School is built for you.

This two-day immersive workshop isn’t just another public speaking course. It’s a live training experience where you’ll get real reps and detailed feedback in a supportive environment with like-minded peers who have the same goal as you - to take a massive step forward.

Best of all, you’ll leave with proven tools and strategies to continue improving long after the event, so you’re not just better for a weekend, but for years to come.

📢 Last Call! Our next Speaker School is April 26-27, with another one on October 11-12. Email info@artofcoaching.com with the phrase "I listen" to get 10% off the date of your choice!

Don’t put this off any longer. Lock in your spot NOW!

READING LIST – Ever wonder what books we recommend on topics like leadership, communication, psychology, and beyond? Check out our curated reading list, which we get asked about just as much as today’s topic! Visit artofcoaching.com/readinglist to dive in and find your next great read.

Come check out The Apprenticeship – Join us for a hands-on workshop designed to enhance your leadership, communication, and relationship-building skills: Learn more here.

Book Brett as a speaker – Bring Brett to your organization for a powerful, customized keynote or in-service training: Request him here.

One-on-one mentoring – Work directly with our team to receive personalized coaching and actionable advice tailored to your goals: Apply here.

Referenced & Related Episodes:

E362: How To Quit Being a People Pleaser

E259: Understanding and Overcoming Perfectionism

E344: Tips For “Balancing” Work and Family Life

E269: How To Ask Better Questions

E353: What To Do If You Feel Like You’re Stagnating

Follow Us:

Website: ArtofCoaching.com

Instagram: @coach_brettb

X: @coach_brettb

This week, we’re revisiting one of our most popular episodes, and a topic people continue to ask us about.

People pleasing. We’ve all seen it before (whether we recognized it or not) - constantly being agreeable, always saying yes, never setting any boundaries - all to the point of self-destruction. If you haven’t experienced it yourself, it’s likely you’ve witnessed someone else demonstrate these behaviors.

And although it may have short-term benefits, we know that these self-destructive tendencies are not sustainable, and can lead to mental, physical, and emotional exhaustion and burnout.

If this is something you think you might struggle with, or if you know someone who does, today’s episode provides a wide variety of perspectives on what “people pleasing” can look like in the day to day world, a number of root causes, and a handful of different solutions you can use to help you manage these behaviors.

More specifically, Brett dives into:

• Quotes that hit - some of the most impactful sound bites I’ve heard on the topic
• What drives you? How our drives can lead us into unhealthy people pleasing behaviors
• The downside to many of the mainstream self-help resources that address the topic
• The necessary self-reflection that has to take place before we can make long-lasting behavioral changes

Host your own AOC Inservice - Tackle leadership challenges with tailored workshops trusted by Apple, NFL teams, and Canadian Special Forces. Gain actionable tools for managing emotions, de-escalating tension, and rebuilding culture. Email us at info@artofcoaching.com to learn more, and visit artofcoaching.com to see how we can help.

AOC Private Mentoring Retreat - Join us in Phoenix for a two-day retreat focused on resetting and crushing your goals. With custom coaching, private suites, and access to exclusive facilities, this experience is built for you. Email info@artofcoaching.com to secure your spot!

Improv Only Workshop - Boost problem-solving, creativity, and teamwork through fun, interactive improv games. Trusted by Google and pro sports teams, this workshop delivers skills that stick. Email info@artofcoaching.com with "Improv Only Workshop" in the subject line.

Referenced Resources:

E210: Assertiveness: How To Ask For What You Want & Get What You Need

E207: How Perception Impacts Communication & Relationships

E208: Robert Greene: Mastering Human Nature and Facing Your Flaws

E200: What To Do When Trying To Help Makes Stuff Worse

E176: When Positive Thinking Doesn’t Work

E22: The Value of Self-Doubt

E130: How Understanding Drives Helps Build Buy-In

Quiz: What Drives You?

Online Course: Valued - mentioned in today’s episode regarding opportunity cost, this life-time access course help you to identify your values and take control of your career

Follow Us:

Website: ArtofCoaching.com

Instagram: @coach_brettb

X: @coach_brettb

We’ve all been there, and watched it happen from afar.

Something happens, and the temperature starts to rise. Tempers flare, and the situation becomes heated. These moments can reveal sides of us we’re not particularly proud of.

How should we respond when life gets tense and others lack empathy or communicate in passive-aggressive ways? What actions can we take to navigate these difficult interactions without making things worse?

To move forward, we must find a way to counter our adrenaline, exude control, and convey compassion. Avoidance is never the answer. The only way out is through.

In today’s practical, real-world episode, Brett discusses:

• • The #1 thing people ultimately want in conflict
  • Conflict archetypes and the importance of knowing which one you are
  • How and when to make concessions without “losing” or admitting fault
  • Why taking a pause or a deep breath isn’t the most practical advice

• BONUS: A crash course in how to NOT piss people off

Want to host your own AOC Inservice?

As a leader, you’ve likely thought, “There’s got to be a better way to handle this.” That’s where we come in. We’ve helped organizations like Apple, Microsoft, NFL and MLS teams, and even the Canadian Special Forces tackle tough topics like managing culture and navigating messy internal dynamics.

Each inservice is tailored to the unique needs of your team. This isn’t a cookie-cutter, feel-good workshop. We deliver actionable tools to manage emotions, de-escalate tension, rebuild culture, and communicate more effectively - tools you can apply NOW.

Email us at info@artofcoaching.com to learn more, and visit artofcoaching.com to see how we can help.

Come spend two days with us at AOC HQ!

This year, we’re thrilled to open our doors in Phoenix, AZ, for an exclusive two-day retreat tailored entirely to you! With a personalized curriculum, access to our gym and pool, private suites, and the camaraderie of like-minded individuals, you’ll leave with clarity, focus, and renewed energy to crush your goals.

Don’t let this opportunity pass you by! Email us at info@artofcoaching.com to learn more and secure your spot today.

Improv Only Workshop

Work in a high-stakes environment that demands constant focus? If you or your team need to disconnect and have fun—while building skills like problem-solving, active listening, and creative thinking—this workshop is for you!

Top companies like Google and professional sports teams have hired US to run these workshops, using games inspired by Whose Line Is It Anyway? tailored to meet specific professional goals. They’ve seen tremendous value, and we’re confident you will too.

Interested? Email info@artofcoaching.com with "Improv Only Workshop" in the subject line for more details!

Related Episodes:

E310 | A Key Strategy For Avoiding Misunderstandings

E294 | Why Do I Freeze Up? How To Handle Stressful Situations Like A Pro

Follow Us:

Website: ArtofCoaching.com

Instagram: @coach_brettb

X: @coach_brettb