The past couple of days I've been pretty down on myself because I messed up and did something I know I shouldn't have. I was distraught because I've gotten to a place in my life where my only real goal is to please God. I do my best to live the way He would have me live and to only do those tings that please Him. But, I'm human and I make mistakes. Even so, I've prayed so many times that if I mess up that it would actually affect me. I don't want to be in a place where I'm doing whatever I want and even though is displeases God, I don't care. I want the sin that I do to affect me in such a way that I take notice and have a heart to change. Well, it does affect me. So much so that I feel so undeserving of God's favor and presence. Which I am undeserving, but it doesn't matter because His grace is sufficient for me. Because He knows that I will mess up sometimes, He's already got grace and mercy stored up for me.

Something that's been on my mind this week is if I'm pleasing God. Is God pleased with me? Am I on the right path? After studying, I've come to the conclusion that, although I may be doing okay, there is more that God would have for me to do. The fact that I feel lazy is a good indication that I should be doing more. This week I've found how to know when I'm in the right position; I will begin to shine. I don't think I've found the place where I am supposed to be yet, but I strive to shine wherever I am. Whatever is lacking in a place, I try to add to the solution and not be part of the problem. Until I find the dark place that needs my light, I'll continue to do whatever else God puts in my heart to do. My obedience will take me there.