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What if the best way to win custody… is to wait?

This episode flips the script on what most veteran parents expect—and reveals what family court actually wants to see when it comes to veteran divorce and custody.

In Part 2 of my conversation with Hon. Mark Johnson (Ret.), we move from trauma to the tricky terrain of divorce and parenting after PTSD. If Part 1 was about what went wrong, this one’s about how to start making it right.

Whether you're a veteran struggling with post-combat stress and facing divorce, or the co-parent trying to hold it all together, this episode is full of clarity, compassion, and a clear plan forward.

In this episode:

· What family court really wants to see before granting custody

· How to set up parenting plans that account for trauma history

· The custody checklist every military family should read

· When it’s time to lower your timeshare—and why that’s not losing

· Why treatment first = better outcomes for everyone

· A mock court speech that every lawyer should borrow

About Mark Johnson: Hon. Mark Johnson (Ret.) served as a Superior Court Judge and Colonel in the U.S. Army. He’s a decorated Iraq War veteran, former Veteran’s Court judge, and the author of Scars and Strife, a novel inspired by real stories of combat trauma and recovery.

RESOURCES:

Mark Johnson's book: Scars and Strife – https://a.co/d/38sod6z
Download Custody Checklist: https://mailchi.mp/2939c428981d/mediation-resources
Kelly’s Book: Victim Is Not Your Name – https://a.co/d/e4VguRk
Legal & Mediation Help: https://saperelawfirm.com
Instagram: https://instagram.com/saperelawfirm
Facebook: https://facebook.com/saperelawfirm

Text us your feedback or questions - we'd love to hear from you.

This one’s powerful.

If you or someone you love has worn the uniform, you already know that the battles don’t always stop when deployment ends. And when veterans divorce, there’s usually a whole lot beneath the surface leading up to the split.

In this episode of The Splitting Smart Podcast, I’m sitting down with someone I deeply respect: Hon. Mark Johnson (Ret.), an Iraq War vet, Bronze Star recipient, and the judge on the Veterans Court in Riverside County. He’s seen it all—PTSD, moral injury, addiction—and he’s here to share what most people (even lawyers) miss when a veteran ends up in family court.

We talk about trauma, recovery, justice, and the marriages caught in between.

In this episode:

• Trauma and healing: what a decade of Veterans Court taught Judge Johnson
• The signs of combat-related PTSD—and how they impact marriage
• Why reintegration is harder than people realize
• When domestic violence can really be about untreated trauma (and what to do about it)
• What spouses and lawyers need to ask—but usually don’t
• Stories of recovery, redemption, and hope

About Mark Johnson:

Hon. Mark Johnson (Ret.) served as a Superior Court Judge and Colonel in the U.S. Army. He’s a decorated Iraq War veteran and longtime advocate for veterans who find themselves in the justice system, especially those struggling with PTSD and trauma. His novel, Scars and Strife, brings these stories to life through fiction rooted in truth.

Stay tuned for Part 2 (episode 62):

In the next episode, we dive deeper into veteran divorce, and what it takes to build real co-parenting agreements after military service and trauma.

HON. MARK JOHNSON (RET.)'S BOOK: Scars and Strife – https://a.co/d/38sod6z

MEDIATION STARTER GUIDE: https://mailchi.mp/2939c428981d/mediation-resources

WATCH ON YOUTUBE: The Splitting Smart Podcast

FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM: Instagram.com/saperelawfirm

JOIN THE CONVERSATION ON FACEBOOK: Facebook.com/saperelawfirm

NEED QUALITY LEGAL HELP? Visit Sapere Law & Mediation

NEED SOME ENCOURAGMENT? Kelly wrote a book just for YOU: Victim Is Not Your Name: Remembering Your True Identity In the Midst of Life Challenges

Text us your feedback or questions - we'd love to hear from you.

They were supposed to be spending their golden years traveling, relaxing, and maybe spoiling any grandkids. Instead? They spent two years locked in a bitter divorce that racked up over $100K in legal fees—and that’s just one side.

In this episode, I’m walking you through the story of my client "Jeremy," a retired man who did everything right. He offered fair settlements. He tried to keep it calm. He just wanted to move on with his life. But his ex was stuck in anger—and her attorney wasn’t there to solve problems, only escalate them.

You’ll hear how a judge finally stepped in with a scolding from the bench, and why it still took two years, multiple court hearings, and over $100,000 (double that for both sides!) before a resolution.

But this isn’t just about one couple. It’s about what happens when you let anger run the show: the stress, the time lost, the way it impacts your health, your family, and your future.

Whether you’re the one feeling angry or you’re up against someone who is—this episode will help you understand what’s really at stake, and how to stop the madness.

We’re unpacking:

• How a “simple” divorce turned into a financial and emotional nightmare
• Why fear often hides behind deep-rooted anger
• The mental and physical toll of prolonged litigation (including health scares)
• Why grown kids start pulling away when things get messy
• How some attorneys thrive on conflict—and drag things out
• The moment a judge said, “This should’ve settled long ago”
• How divorce mediation could’ve changed everything

MEDIATION STARTER GUIDE: https://mailchi.mp/2939c428981d/mediation-resources

WATCH ON YOUTUBE: The Splitting Smart Podcast

FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM: Instagram.com/saperelawfirm

JOIN THE CONVERSATION ON FACEBOOK: Facebook.com/saperelawfirm

NEED QUALITY LEGAL HELP? Visit Sapere Law & Mediation

NEED SOME ENCOURAGMENT? Kelly wrote a book just for YOU: Victim Is Not Your Name: Remembering Your True Identity In the Midst of Life Challenges