Episodes

  • Umphrey's McGee and Party Vibes
    Jun 10 2025

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    We dive into Chris's epic weekend house party that evolved into a 24-hour rager, complete with barbecue, fire pits, and an Umphrey's McGee concert adventure.

    • Chris hosted an all-day party that transformed from a pre-concert gathering to a sunrise after-party
    • The crew traveled to the Riverside Theater via city bus, where Chris befriended and smuggled a stranger named Isaac into the concert
    • Tony experienced his first Umphrey's McGee show and shares his honest impressions as a first-timer
    • The group reminisces about the dangers of flipping through CD binders while driving compared to today's voice-activated music
    • Party highlights included outdoor fire pits, projector setups, and guests partying until sunrise despite the time change

    If you enjoyed this episode, subscribe to Top Shelf Stories wherever you get your podcasts and follow us on social media for more behind-the-scenes content.


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    52 mins
  • Short Kids, Big Problems
    Jun 3 2025

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    Jay shares his concerns about his 12-year-old son being bullied at school, prompting a candid discussion about generational approaches to handling bullies and what parents can do when their children are targeted.

    • The hosts share personal experiences with bullying from their childhoods
    • Discussion of different strategies to counter bullies, including the "Eight Mile" approach of owning insults
    • Debate about whether each generation gets progressively "softer" than the last
    • Tony shares a story about being hit by a friend's father and his grandfather's reaction
    • The group explores how physical discipline has evolved across generations
    • Jay details his son's situation and the steps he's taken to address the bullying so far
    • The hosts weigh whether teaching a child to fight back is effective or potentially harmful
    • Consideration of whether "killing with kindness" works or just makes a target appear weaker
    • Acknowledgment that today's bullying extends beyond school through social media and technology
    • The consensus that at some point, standing up to bullies may be necessary, even if uncomfortable

    "Beat the shit out of your bully." - A controversial but heartfelt closing thought from Tony as the hosts wrap up their discussion of this challenging parenting situation.


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    49 mins
  • Revisiting 90s Fashion and the Generational Tech Divide
    May 27 2025

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    This episode delves into the challenges of parenting in a consumer-driven society, contrasting our childhood experiences with modern-day realities. We share personal stories highlighting the nostalgia of starter jackets and the implications of raising overly pampered children in an often disposable world.

    • Growing up with significant differences in childhood wealth
    • The importance of teaching kids the value of hard work
    • Reflections on iconic 90s fashion and nostalgia
    • The absurd evolution of children’s footwear trends
    • Balancing technology use with childhood experiences
    • Navigating the complexities of modern parenting

    If you enjoyed this episode, let us know how our stories resonate with your experiences!

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    30 mins
  • Snow Wars
    May 26 2025

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    We dive deep into the psychology and tactics of snow removal, exploring everything from avoiding responsibility to neighborhood snow-clearing dynamics. Our lighthearted debate reveals how something as simple as clearing a driveway can expose personality traits, living situations, and neighborly relationships.

    • Different approaches to snow removal based on housing situation
    • The struggle with heavy, packed snow left by municipal plows
    • Battery-powered snow tools and their effectiveness for different snow types
    • Snowblower maintenance and usage strategies
    • The unspoken pressure of maintaining snow-cleared property near professionally serviced homes
    • Extending snow removal efforts to help neighbors
    • The contrast between minimal effort (single paths) and maximum clearing (widened driveways)


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    7 mins
  • What Would You Do For $50?
    May 25 2025

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    Our podcast intro goes hilariously off the rails when a host makes an unexpected comment with his mic on, leading to a completely unfiltered conversation about studio equipment needs and absurd fundraising ideas.

    • Discussion about needing to revamp our podcast studio with proper tables and microphone stands
    • Joke about starting a fundraiser with questionable content creation strategies
    • Deep dive into the economics of subscription-based content platforms
    • Questioning why people pay for content on platforms like OnlyFans
    • Theories about the value of interaction and personalization in paid digital content
    • Recognition that we've completely derailed the episode with our tangential conversation


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    7 mins
  • Laughing Through Dental Dilemmas and Insurance Woes
    May 20 2025

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    We explore the anxieties, costs, and humor surrounding dental visits and share personal anecdotes about navigating the dental landscape. Our conversations dive into fears, innovations in dental technology, and the importance of transparency in dental care.

    • Discussing the shared fear of dental visits
    • Sharing personal stories about avoidance and consequences
    • Highlighting the financial reality of dental care
    • Navigating children's dental health and costs
    • Discussing technological advancements in dentistry
    • Exploring future innovations in dental practices
    • Emphasizing the importance of open communication with dentists

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    39 mins
  • Stand-Up Struggles and Success Stories
    May 13 2025

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    This episode showcases a hilarious yet chaotic event where friends forced each other into a comedy challenge. The conversation dives deep into their experiences, the nature of friendship, the art of comedy, and reflects on the unexpected outcomes of their stand-up night.
    • Friends share the diabolical challenge of performing stand-up comedy
    • Tension rises as they recount preparation for the big show
    • Live performances lead to unexpected hilarity and chaos
    • Lessons learned about comfort zones and overcoming fears
    • Reflections on the support of friendship and humor

    If you got a product you want us to whore out on our show.

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    38 mins
  • Surviving Honeymoon Horror and Vacation Disasters
    May 6 2025

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    A wild honeymoon turns into a comedic disaster filled with turbulence, hotel chaos, and drunken escapades in Mexico. Jay shares hilarious tales from the trip, underscoring the unpredictable nature of travel and the value of humor in navigating misfortunes.
    • Highlights the expectations versus reality of a honeymoon
    • Captures travel woes from flights to hotel check-ins
    • Discusses tipsy misadventures and cultural misunderstandings
    • Explores the importance of humor during chaotic experiences
    • Reflects on the bond strengthening through adversity
    Give us some stars, give us a rating and review. Do it on whatever you listen to on Apple, on Spotify. It helps us out.

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    29 mins
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