You might think you’re just protecting your peace. You might say you have high standards now. That you’ve outgrown certain people. That if someone really cared, they’d just know how to love you right. But lately, have you been pushing people away without even realizing it? Judging their efforts before they land? Feeling like no one ever gets it quite right? Maybe your healing has made you sharper. Wiser. But has it also made you harder to reach?

This episode is about what happens when the thing you’ve been working so hard for—real love, real support—starts to feel impossible to accept. Not because it isn’t there, but because it’s showing up in forms you didn’t expect. Because you’ve started thinking love only counts if it looks and sounds exactly the way you pictured it.

We’re going to talk about that. The spell of perfection. The pressure to be fully healed before letting anyone in. The way we start to treat love like a product instead of a relationship. And how to catch yourself before you wall yourself off from the very thing you’re craving.

If this hits, you’re not broken. You’re just at a threshold. Let’s talk about how to cross it.

🔓 UNLOCK THE FULL EPISODE + BONUS CONTENT: Want to keep listening? Get full access to this episode, ad-free listening, and my entire archive, plus exclusive Patreon-exclusive podcasts like The Consciousness Stream and The Deep Cut and access to Pathwork, my digital mystery school.

Pro Tip: iPhone users should sign up through a browser (Safari or Chrome) to avoid Apple’s extra fees.

🔗 CLICK HERE TO LISTEN TO THE FULL EPISODE

My full archive is available at patreon.com/backfromtheborderline

acast+ https://plus.acast.com/s/back-from-the-borderline.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

There are wounds that don’t show up in diagnoses or clinical language. The kind that live in the silence after a question you weren’t supposed to ask. These are the questions that form when love is offered only through obedience, when God is turned into surveillance, when the sacred becomes something you’re told to fear. For many of us raised in Christian frameworks (especially the more rigid or institutional ones) that wound still lives in the body.

This episode is an attempt to speak to that wound. To name it without collapsing into blame, and to look at the deeper story beneath the one many of us were handed. I’m not here to convert you, and I’m not here to condemn anyone who’s found peace inside traditional religious practice. I know plenty of people who walk their faith with open eyes and open hearts. But I also know how many of us were handed something hollow, or cruel, or incoherent, and told it was holy.

This conversation is an attempt to locate the pattern beneath the story and to learn the difference between the Christ of empire and the Christ who spoke in symbols. We dive into themes of religious trauma, but also about what can be reclaimed. The sacred didn’t disappear. It was distorted, covered over, and misnamed. This episode is for anyone who’s felt that loss and wants to begin tracing the thread again, not by going back, but by going deeper.

You’ll hear about how Christianity absorbed and erased older traditions, how empire used myth to consolidate power, and how figures like Jesus and Mary Magdalene may have carried far more esoteric and integrative wisdom than we were ever taught. But more than that, you’ll hear from someone — me — who’s been through the collapse, walked away, and is now circling back. Not to return, but to recover something essential.

If you’ve ever felt like the word “God” was ruined for you… if you’ve struggled to trust your own spiritual instincts… if you’ve longed for something real but couldn’t stomach the dogma… this episode is for you. Not to give you answers, but to invite you back into the questions that are worth asking.

GO DEEPER WITH HUNDREDS OF BONUS EPISODES + WEEKLY PATHWORK PROMPTS.

Unlock my FULL ARCHIVE of members-only content + Patreon exclusives:

PATHWORK → Weekly self-inquiry prompts to turn insight into transformation.

THE CONSCIOUSNESS STREAM → Raw, unfiltered deep dives.

THE DEEP CUT → Structured breakdowns of esoteric + psychological themes.

BONUS EPISODES + RESOURCES → Hundreds of hours of hidden gems.

Start exploring right now for FREE and see everything waiting for you at backfromtheborderline.com.

acast+ https://plus.acast.com/s/back-from-the-borderline.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Katy Perry kissed the ground after spending a mere three minutes in space. The headlines framed it as some kind of feminist milestone. The internet didn’t agree. In this episode, we trace the unraveling of a cultural myth that once felt untouchable. We talk about how celebrity became a modern form of sainthood. How did we get here? And are we standing at the edge of its collapse? From the spectacle of the Blue Origin mission to echoes of Marie Antoinette standing on the balcony of a crumbling monarchy, this moment is a mirror. A sign that the performance is no longer holding.

We explore the history of idolization, the archetypes we’ve projected onto the famous, and what it means to realize those archetypes are no longer serving us. This is also about empire. The ways fame, influence, and individual power have been shaped and sold inside systems that are now starting to break. If you’ve ever found yourself caught in the loop of admiration, envy, projection, parasocial relationships, or performance — this is a depth psychological tour into what’s underneath it all.

But it’s also a return. A reminder that your energy belongs to you and how to call it back. And maybe, as new tools emerge and old myths die, we’re not meant to look for new idols. Maybe we’re meant to look inward.

🔓 UNLOCK THE FULL EPISODE + BONUS CONTENT: Want to keep listening? Get full access to this episode, ad-free listening, and my entire archive, plus exclusive Patreon-exclusive podcasts like The Consciousness Stream and The Deep Cut and access to Pathwork, my digital mystery school.

Pro Tip: iPhone users should sign up through a browser (Safari or Chrome) to avoid Apple’s extra fees.

🔗 CLICK HERE TO LISTEN TO THE FULL EPISODE

My full archive is available at patreon.com/backfromtheborderline

acast+ https://plus.acast.com/s/back-from-the-borderline.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.