Preview
  • Santa Steps Out

  • The Santa Claus Chronicles, Book 1
  • By: Robert Devereaux
  • Narrated by: Chet Williamson
  • Length: 9 hrs and 29 mins
  • 4.0 out of 5 stars (17 ratings)

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Santa Steps Out

By: Robert Devereaux
Narrated by: Chet Williamson
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Publisher's summary

Visions far tastier than sugarplums dance in Santa’s head tonight!

His generosity is legendary. He has a devoted wife, a crack team of sky-borne reindeer, hordes of industrious elves, and the love of good little boys and girls around the globe. But what unholy desires now propel him into the lascivious clutches of a certain fairy? And who was he before the sleigh and workshop, in times forgotten?

She munches on molars, summons drowned sailors to her pleasure, and recalls, sharp as a pinprick, her life as the most savage of ash nymphs. Why then is she stuck, night after night, hovering above pillows to leave coins for gap-toothed brats? More importantly, how quickly can she captivate the jolly old elf to the north?

He's huge, fluffy, lonesome, and unbearably horny. On his Easter rounds, he contrives, as often as possible, to get a grip on himself and peer into interesting bedrooms. But who in the world will throw him down and ravage him as the lovers under his gaze ravage one another?

For the answers, unknot that bright red bow, tear off those wrappings, and enjoy!

©1998, 2000, 2011 Robert Devereaux (P)2020 Robert Devereaux
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What listeners say about Santa Steps Out

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  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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Listener received this title free

santa steps out

It's not this is not your normal santa story I would definitely keep out of hands of children with that said it was very entertaining.
chet Did a good job narrating.

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1 person found this helpful

  • Overall
    3 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
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    3 out of 5 stars
Listener received this title free

DNF

Did not finish. The book was well written and entertaining. It's not for kids. Written by a man with a raunchy style. I listened to about an hour of it, then decided this style of story just isn't for me. The style reminds me of Animal House or Austin Powers. If you are looking for this kind of sexual humor, this book is perfect. I'm used to reading and listening to romance so it just wasn't interesting enough to me to continue another 7 hours.

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  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    4 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    4 out of 5 stars
Listener received this title free

meet the revised santa

This is not the santa I grew up with or know today, but I'm very pleased to have met this version of him. This story is an adult version of some of your favorite and mist sacred childhood icons ripped to shreds and then stomped into the mud. You must gave a skewed perspective to enjoy it properly, and I did!! Horror, humor. and heat. I voluntarily listened to a free copy of this and am giving an honest review. The narrator did a great job bringing it to sick life.

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  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
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    4 out of 5 stars
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disturbing

I gave this book 4 stars because of it's creativity and performance. now I'm a HUGE fan of erotica of most types, but some of the content on this book really turned my stomach. for example: Santa shoots his load on a Christmas tree and turns the jizz into candy canes. that was all fine and dandy until it went on to describe children eating them. I know it's fiction, but that literally made me sick and I stopped listening shortly after the tooth fairy shat out dimes to put under a pillow.

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  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars
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Really funny

I really found myself laughing at this a lot. Great story, well written and performed. Definitely not a holiday story for the kids though. Very enjoyable.

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    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars
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    4 out of 5 stars
Listener received this title free

sleep deprived purchase that I didn't regret

laughed at the cover art at 2am rocking a Baby to sleep. next day thought I had made a terrible mistake.

decided to listen at Christmas because it felt fitting.
I was entertained.
it's silly, crude and reduculous, but that's fine.

if you are looking for great plot and character development, leave now. if you want a completely brain shutting off dose of silly while you giggle at Santa trying to hide an affair from his wife, step right up

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  • Overall
    2 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    3 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    1 out of 5 stars
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This story wasn't for me

DNF
This story just wasn't for me. I barely made it to the end of chapter one.
From the bit I did hear, the audio narration was ok

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