About Men in My Town
I was abducted, beaten and raped by a stranger. It wasn’t a neighbor, a coach, a relative, a family friend or teacher. It was a recidivist pedophile predator who spent time in prison for previous sex crimes; an animal hunting for victims in the quiet, bucolic, suburban neighborhoods of Lincoln, Rhode Island.
I was able to identify the guy and the car he was driving. Although he was arrested that night and indicted a few months later, he never went to trial. His trial never took place because he was brutally beaten to death in Providence before his court date. 48 years later, no one has ever been charged with the crime.
In the time between the night of my assault and the night he was murdered, I lived in fear. I was afraid he was still around town. Afraid he was looking for me. Afraid he would track me down and kill me. The fear didn’t go away when he was murdered. Although he was no longer a threat, the simple life and innocence of a 14-year-old boy was gone forever. Carefree childhood thoughts replaced with the unrelenting realization that my world wasn’t a safe place. My peace shattered by a horrific criminal act of sexual violence.
Over the past 48 years, I’ve been haunted by horrible, recurring memories of what he did to me. He visits me in my sleep. There have been dreams–nightmares actually–dozens of them, sweat inducing, yelling-in-my-sleep nightmares filled with images and emotions as real as they were when it actually happened.
It doesn’t get easier over time. Long dead, he still visits me, silently sneaking up from out of nowhere when I least expect it. From the grave, he sits by my side on the couch every time the evening news reports a child abduction or a vicious random act of violence. I don’t watch America’s Most Wanted or Law and Order SVU, because the stories are a catalyst, triggering long suppressed emotions, feelings, memories, fear and horror. Real life horror stories rip painful suppressed memories out from where they hide, from that recessed place in my brain that stores dark, dangerous, horrible memories. It happened when William Bonin confessed to abducting, raping and murdering 14 boys in California; when Jesse Timmendequas raped and murdered Megan Kanka in New Jersey; when Ben Ownby, missing for four days, and Shawn Hornbeck, missing for four years, were recovered in Missouri.
Despite what happened that night and the constant reminders that continue to haunt me years later, I wouldn’t change what happened. The animal that attacked me was a serial predator, a violent pedophile trolling my neighborhood in Lincoln, Rhode Island looking for young boys. He beat me, raped me, and I stayed alive. I lived to see him arrested, indicted and murdered. It might not have turned out this way if he had grabbed one of my friends or another kid from my neighborhood. Perhaps he’d still be alive. Perhaps there would be dozens of more victims and perhaps he would have progressed to the point of silencing his victims by murdering them.
Out of fear, shame and guilt, I’d been silent for over three decades, sharing with very few people the story of what happened to me. No more. The silence had to end. The fear, the shame, the guilt had to go. It was time to stop keeping this secret from the people closest to me, people I care about, people I love, my long-time friends and my family. It was, and is, time to speak out to raise public awareness of male sexual assault, to let other victims know that they’re not alone and to help victims of rape and violent crime understand that the emotion, fear and memories that may still haunt them are not uncommon to those of us who have shared a similar experience. For those who suffer in silence, I hope my story brings some comfort, strength, peace and hope.
Keith Smith
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About Investing, Insurance & Credit, a conversation with a Wall Street veteran
I didn’t have an answer to the question, if you could recommend only one book to read what would it be, so I sat down to write it. This isn’t a textbook. I didn’t write about naked options, index arbitrage, yield-to-call, forex pairs trading, inverted yield curves, tax-deferred universal life insurance, or how to fly first class around the world by using a dozen credit cards to rack up travel reward points. I wrote about the basics, the fundamentals, the foundational knowledge you need to make informed decisions about investing, insurance, and credit.
I believe over the course of my 40-year career I’ve listened in on maybe 2,500 to 3,000 conference calls with research analysts, investment analysts, economists, market strategists, portfolio managers, and officials of the Federal Reserve while working in Chicago, Dallas, London, New York, and Zurich with some of the most talented, smartest people in wealth management. I’m not a know-it-all but after four decades of giving this a shot, I’ve learned a lot and I wrote this book to share it with you.
As I mentioned, this isn’t a textbook. I wrote as if I were discussing things I’d want to share if we had a few hours to talk and I liked you. Let’s talk.
About the author
A graduate of Providence College, Keith Smith completed the Securities Industry Institute Program at The Wharton School, University of Pennsylvania and holds the Certified Investment Management Analyst certification (CIMA®) issued by the Investments & Wealth Institute.
More information is available at www.InvestingInsuranceCredit.wordpress.com
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