
All the Worst Humans
How I Made News for Dictators, Tycoons, and Politicians
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Narrated by:
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Holter Graham
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By:
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Phil Elwood
About this listen
Long-listed, New York Times Book Review Notable Books of the Year, 2024
Long-listed, Amazon.com Best Books of the Year, 2024
This program is ready by Audie Award-winning narrator Holter Graham.
A bridge-burning, riotous memoir by a top PR operative in Washington who exposes the secrets of the $129-billion industry that controls so much of what we see and hear in the media—from a man who used to pull the strings, and who is now pulling back the curtain.
After nearly two decades in the Washington PR business, Elwood wants to come clean, by exposing the dark underbelly of the very industry that’s made him so successful. The first step is revealing exactly what he’s been up to for the past twenty years—and it isn’t pretty.
Elwood has worked for a murderer’s row of questionable clients, including Gaddafi, Assad, and the government of Qatar. In All the Worst Humans, Elwood unveils how the PR business works, and how the truth gets made, spun, and sold to the public—not shying away from the gritty details of his unlikely career.
This is a piercing look into the corridors of money, power, politics, and control, all told in Elwood’s disarmingly funny and entertaining voice. He recounts a four-day Las Vegas bacchanal with a dictator’s son, plotting communications strategies against a terrorist organization in Western Africa, and helping to land a Middle Eastern dictator’s wife a glowing profile in Vogue on the same time the Arab Spring broke out. And he reveals all his slippery tricks for seducing journalists in order to create chaos and ultimately cover for politicians, dictators, and spies—the industry-secret tactics that led to his rise as a political PR pro.
Along the way, Phil walks the halls of the Capitol, rides in armored cars through Abuja, and watches his client lose his annual income at the roulette table. But as he moved up the ranks, he felt worse and worse about the sleaziness of it all—until Elwood receives a shocking wake-up call from the FBI. This risky game nearly cost Elwood his life and his freedom. Seeing the light, Elwood decides to change his ways, and his clients, and to tell the full truth about who is the worst human.
A Macmillan Audio production from Henry Holt & Company.
©2024 Phil Elwood (P)2024 Macmillan AudioListeners also enjoyed...
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Critic reviews
"Hilarious and harrowing, and hard to put down. Indeed, I didn't put it down."—Christopher Buckley, author of Thank You for Smoking
"Journalists often wonder what spinmasters are doing to influence them. The reality Phil Elwood reveals is worse—and more interesting—than we usually imagine. All the Worst Humans is an exhilarating ride through the underbelly of global power structures."—Ben Smith, author of Traffic and editor in chief of Semafor
"If Hunter S. Thompson billed clients by the hour, it would look like All The Worst Humans by Phil Elwood. The pacing and storytelling propel the book's epic sweep across the darkside of DC and global hotspots. Even the most experienced in PR will learn things they did not know, and Elwood's gripping personal story is an unexpected and wild ride."—Bill McCarren, former Executive Director, National Press Club
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David Crader is a has-been. A former child actor from the hit teen drama Rev Beach, he now rotates between his new roles as deadbeat dad, part-time alcoholic, and occasional videogame voice actor. But when David is summoned to Los Angeles by Grace, his ex-wife and former co-star, he suddenly sees an opportunity for a reboot—not just of the show that made him famous, but also of his listless existence.
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Diminishing Rewards
- By Laurence R. Baker on 02-06-25
By: Justin Taylor
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Do Something
- Coming of Age Amid the Glitter and Doom of '70s New York
- By: Guy Trebay
- Narrated by: Edoardo Ballerini
- Length: 6 hrs and 29 mins
- Unabridged
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Born in the Bronx, Guy Trebay was raised in an atmosphere of privilege on Long Island’s North Shore after his entrepreneurial father struck business gold with Hawaiian Surf, a wildly successful cologne company that capitalized on the optimism of the 1960s as marketed to “an adventurous new breed of men.’’ But behind the facade of material prosperity lay the emotional disarray of a household dominated by a charismatic, con artist father, a glamorous yet lost and careless mother, a family haunted by tragedy.
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Heartache and heartbreak and the will to survive.
- By Polly B. on 07-05-24
By: Guy Trebay
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All the President's Money
- Investigating the Secret Foreign Schemes That Made the Biden Family Rich
- By: James Comer
- Narrated by: Jim Seybert
- Length: 8 hrs and 22 mins
- Unabridged
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Joe Biden made less than $200,000 a year for most of his life, but as soon as he left office, he bought his second multimillion-dollar mansion. He shared a bookkeeper with Hunter Biden, and a law firm with several Biden family members that managed their money. Hunter, who hasn’t had a real job in decades, has raked in tens of millions of dollars. Joe Biden met many of the foreigners writing the checks, but still maintains all of these situations are nothing to be concerned about. James Comer takes listeners on a journey through the murky world of the Biden family’s business dealings.
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The coverup!
- By Amazon Customer on 01-18-25
By: James Comer
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When the Clock Broke
- Con Men, Conspiracists, and How America Cracked Up in the Early 1990s
- By: John Ganz
- Narrated by: Eric Jason Martin
- Length: 15 hrs and 17 mins
- Unabridged
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With the Soviet Union extinct, Saddam Hussein defeated, and U.S. power at its zenith, the early 1990s promised a “kinder, gentler America.” Instead, it was a period of rising anger and domestic turmoil, anticipating the polarization and resurgent extremism we know today. In When the Clock Broke, the acclaimed political writer John Ganz tells the story of America’s late-century discontents.
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Amazing history of the early 90s
- By Aaron R. Isaacson on 06-25-24
By: John Ganz
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Confessions of an Economic Hitman
- By: John Perkins
- Narrated by: Brian Emerson
- Length: 9 hrs and 16 mins
- Unabridged
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"Economic hit men," John Perkins writes, "are highly paid professionals who cheat countries around the globe out of trillions of dollars. Their tools include fraudulent financial reports, rigged elections, payoffs, extortion, sex, and murder."
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Uninformed and largely fictitious
- By Trevor Burnham on 05-31-05
By: John Perkins
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The Great Air Race
- Death, Glory, and the Dawn of American Aviation
- By: John Lancaster
- Narrated by: Jonathan Todd Ross
- Length: 10 hrs and 46 mins
- Unabridged
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The incredible, untold story of the men who risked their lives in the first transcontinental air contest—and put American aviation on the map.
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Very entertaining/informative book
- By D. Littman on 12-09-22
By: John Lancaster
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The Achilles Trap
- Saddam Hussein, the C.I.A., and the Origins of America's Invasion of Iraq
- By: Steve Coll
- Narrated by: Malcolm Hillgartner
- Length: 17 hrs and 58 mins
- Unabridged
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When the United States invaded Iraq in 2003, its message was clear: Iraq, under the control of strongman Saddam Hussein, possessed weapons of mass destruction that, if left unchecked, posed grave danger to the world. But when no WMDs were found, the United States and its allies were forced to examine the political and intelligence failures that had led to the invasion and the occupation, and the civil war that followed. One integral question has remained unsolved.
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From the Saddam’s Point of View.
- By philip on 03-08-24
By: Steve Coll
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Circle of Hope
- A Reckoning with Love, Power, and Justice in an American Church
- By: Eliza Griswold
- Narrated by: Jennifer Pickens
- Length: 11 hrs and 57 mins
- Unabridged
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Americans have been leaving their churches. Some drift away. Some stay home. And some have been searching for—and finding—more authentic ways to find and follow Jesus. This is the story of one such “radical outpost of Jesus followers” dedicated to service, the Sermon on the Mount, and working toward justice for all in this life, not just salvation for some in the next. Part of a little-known yet influential movement at the edge of American evangelicalism, Philadelphia’s Circle of Hope grew for forty years, planted four congregations, and then found itself in crisis.
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Honest and Compelling
- By SKC on 02-08-25
By: Eliza Griswold
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Opus
- The Cult of Dark Money, Human Trafficking, and Right-Wing Conspiracy inside the Catholic Church
- By: Gareth Gore
- Narrated by: Gareth Gore
- Length: 13 hrs and 55 mins
- Unabridged
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For over half a century, Banco Popular was one of the most profitable banks in the world—until one day, in 2017, when the Spanish bank suddenly collapsed overnight. When investigative journalist Gareth Gore was dispatched to report on the story, he expected to find yet another case of unbridled capitalist ambition gone wrong. Instead, he uncovered decades of deception that hid one of the most brazen cases of corporate pillaging in history, perpetrated by a group of men sworn to celibacy and self-flagellation who had secretly controlled Popular and abused their positions there.
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fascinating and disturbing
- By JRW on 10-06-24
By: Gareth Gore
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Propaganda Wars
- How the Global Elite Control What You See, Think, and Feel
- By: Glenn Beck, Justin Haskins
- Narrated by: Glenn Beck
- Length: 9 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
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In Propaganda Wars: How the Global Elite Control What You See, Think, and Feel, New York Times bestselling writers Glenn Beck and Justin Haskins uncover the secrets behind the greatest system of control and manipulation ever created.
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Timely and thought provoking!
- By darin leetun on 01-01-25
By: Glenn Beck, and others
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Health and Safety
- A Breakdown
- By: Emily Witt
- Narrated by: Emily Witt
- Length: 9 hrs
- Unabridged
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In the summer of 2016, a divisive presidential election was underway, and a new breed of right-wing rage was on the rise. Emily Witt, who would soon publish her first book on sex in the digital age, had recently quit antidepressants for a more expansive world of psychedelic experimentation. From her apartment in Brooklyn, she began to catch glimpses of the clandestine nightlife scene thrumming around her.
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Bored voice
- By Amazon Customer on 12-20-24
By: Emily Witt
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The Basic Laws of Human Stupidity
- By: Carlo M. Cipolla, Nassim Nicholas Taleb - foreword
- Narrated by: Paul Boehmer
- Length: 54 mins
- Unabridged
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Throughout history, a powerful force has hindered the growth of human welfare and happiness. It is more powerful than the Mafia or the military. It has global catastrophic effects and can be found anywhere from the world's most powerful boardrooms to your local bar. It is human stupidity. Carlo M. Cipolla, noted professor of economic history at the UC Berkeley, created this vitally important book in order to detect and neutralize its threat.
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What do you have to loose?
- By Andres on 04-06-21
By: Carlo M. Cipolla, and others
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Black Pill
- How I Witnessed the Darkest Corners of the Internet Come to Life, Poison Society, and Capture American Politics
- By: Elle Reeve
- Narrated by: Elle Reeve
- Length: 8 hrs and 28 mins
- Unabridged
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Award-winning journalist and CNN correspondent Elle Reeve was not surprised by the insurrection at the Capitol on January 6, 2021. With years of in-depth research and on-the-ground investigative reporting under her belt, Reeve was aware of the preoccupations of the online far right and their journey from the computer to QAnon, militias, and racist groups. At the same time, Reeve saw a parallel growth of counterforces, with citizen vigilantes using new tools and tactics to take down the far right.
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Great story — uneven performance
- By SSG on 08-19-24
By: Elle Reeve
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Back of Beyond
- A Cody Hoyt Novel
- By: C. J. Box
- Narrated by: Holter Graham
- Length: 11 hrs and 3 mins
- Unabridged
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Cody Hoyt, while a brilliant cop, is an alcoholic struggling with two months of sobriety when his mentor and AA sponsor Hank Winters is found burned to death in a remote mountain cabin. At first it looks like the suicide of a man who's fallen off the wagon, but Cody knows Hank better than that. Sober for fourteen years, Hank took pride in his hard-won sobriety and never hesitated to drop whatever he was doing to talk Cody off a ledge. When Cody takes a closer look at the scene of his friend's death, it becomes apparent that foul play is at hand.
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Cody Hoyt is GREAT!
- By Terry on 08-09-12
By: C. J. Box
What listeners say about All the Worst Humans
Highly rated for:
Reviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Anonymous User
- 01-16-25
Phenomenal
Best book I read this year, voice artist is amazing too. Incredible insight into a the PR industry. Highly recommend.
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- DHaston
- 07-05-24
Wow, what a story!
This gives such an insight into how the real world works. We always wonder about what happens inside the machine and this book is such an honest look inside. Listened as an Audiobook and the narration was great and kept me interested the whole time.
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4 people found this helpful
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- Amazon Customer
- 07-14-24
this book is awesome, listen now!
words aren’t needed, read now. words aren’t needed, read now. words aren’t needed, read now. words aren’t needed, read now. seven unique words, come on
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- Michael Dezso
- 07-16-24
Entertaining walk through a crazy corner of the media world p ok
Having crossed a few of those pathes, I can attest to Elwood’s insight and talent. He’s a terrific arsonist as he puts it. The Qatar Olympics example was wiiiild. Glad he’s putting his talents to use for good now.
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- Steve Slater
- 08-08-24
Kept it interesting the whole time)
( it pops-up that a review has to be at least 15 words, but my title above communicated what I have to say )
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- Emily
- 07-15-24
Intriguing and captivating
A first hand look at the underbelly of world leaders, politics and global corruption. Fascinating!
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- Reading Grandma
- 09-11-24
An insightful yet terribly depressing read…
Eye opening to say the least for this ”Pollyanna”! Sad to hear the “insider story” from this man’s perspective. Depressing to learn how life really is carried on by our leadership. Makes me want to seek Ketamine too 🥲…& I’m not a drug user at all!
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2 people found this helpful
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- J. K. Ready
- 12-12-24
Eye opening read
One of the best nonfiction books I have ever read. Also the Audible has amazing casting and was very entertaining.
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- William K. Shireman
- 07-04-24
Binge-worthy. Every worried citizen needs to hear this story.
Every American red and blue needs to hear this powerful primer on the political power broker industry, the narrative-spinners that keep the silenced majority divided and the monied in power, and the infection of the media industry by a business model that profits by dividing Americans in fear, anger and hate. Elwood was caught up deeply in it, and while he’s no model of virtue, he is an honest insider who names names, and he represents thousands who continue to exploit the system, some with and some without remorse.
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- Amazon Customer
- 08-04-24
Eye opening!
Great look at the power of the PR machine. Would love a volume 2 with more stories.
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