Chainsaw Honeymoon
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Narrated by:
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Valerie Mirarchi
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By:
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Steven Ramirez
About this listen
Can Ruby save her parents’ marriage? Maybe, with a little help.
A year ago, Alan and Stacey Navarro separated, leaving their daughter, Ruby, to live with her mom and an over-caffeinated Shih Tzu. People split up all the time, and most kids might learn to deal. Not Ruby.
A bright, funny 14-year-old who loves shoes and horror movies, Ruby is on an insane mission to get her parents back together. But she can’t do it alone.
She needs her two best friends, a dog named Ed Wood, an arrogant filmmaker, a bizarre collection of actors - and a chainsaw-wielding movie killer. Yeah, it’ll be fine.
What reviewers are saying:
“In the form of Ruby, Ramirez imparts to readers all the confusion brought about by puberty; the emotional neediness camouflaged by sarcasm; the obsession and continuing frustration with boys; and the bonds female teenagers forge with one another.” (IndieReader)
“Whether your favorite form is surreal, tongue-in-cheek, word play or hysterical, you’ll find ample portions of each to keep you laughing. The pace is fast, told from several points of view, and full of surprises that make for an unforgettable read.” (Readers’ Favorite)
“The writing throughout the novel is sharp and smart, depicting the City of Angels like a key character, setting the stage for the plot to unravel, while also capturing some of the strangest sides of the film industry. Ruby is a precocious and fascinating narrator, and the supporting cast of friends, actors, and unexpected allies drive this novel forward.” (Self-Publishing Review)
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- Narrated by: Rachael Warren
- Length: 10 hrs and 44 mins
- Unabridged
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When Beatrice Trixie Jordan replies to a personal ad, she meets Jacob Grace, a charming, effervescent 30-something free-spirit writer passionately seeking life. He possesses his own turns of phrase and ways of thinking and feeling that dissonantly harmonize with Trixie's off-center vision. As they rollercoaster through the joys and furies of their wrenching romance, they try to come to terms with the hurt brought about by both of their distant fathers who, in different ways, forsook them.
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To see a fortune teller or not to see one...
- By Renee on 08-08-18
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Diamond Life
- By: Aliya King
- Narrated by: Patricia R. Floyd
- Length: 14 hrs and 23 mins
- Unabridged
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A New York Times best-selling author and award-winning journalist with publishing credits in Essence and Vibe, Aliya S. King uses her experience covering celebrity culture to create juicy tales of sex, ambition, and betrayal. In Diamond Life, Alex Maxwell’s rapper husband, Birdie, sees his album go multiplatinum - but life in the spotlight might be too much for his marriage to withstand.
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Not impressed
- By Dream on 06-27-12
By: Aliya King
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True Stories from an Unreliable Eyewitness
- A Feminist Coming of Age
- By: Christine Lahti
- Narrated by: Christine Lahti
- Length: 5 hrs and 30 mins
- Unabridged
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For decades, actress and director Christine Lahti has captivated the hearts and minds of her audience through iconic roles in Chicago Hope, Running on Empty, Housekeeping, And Justice for All, Swing Shift, Law & Order: Special Victims Unit, God of Carnage, and The Blacklist. Now, in True Stories from an Unreliable Eyewitness, this acclaimed performer channels her creativity inward to share her own story for the first time.
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Christine Lahti, Actress, Activist and A+ Author!
- By L. Cat Schultz on 10-26-18
By: Christine Lahti
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Lifted by the Great Nothing
- By: Karim Dimechkie
- Narrated by: Neil Shah
- Length: 8 hrs and 52 mins
- Unabridged
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Max doesn't remember his mother, who was murdered by burglars before they emigrated from Beirut to New Jersey. He lives with his father, Rasheed, who is enamored of his concept of American culture - baseball and barbeques - and tries to shed his Lebanese heritage completely.
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Excellent
- By Cheyenne on 06-13-15
By: Karim Dimechkie
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The Never Never Sisters
- By: L. Alison Heller
- Narrated by: Julia Whelan
- Length: 9 hrs and 4 mins
- Unabridged
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Marriage counselor Paige Reinhardt is counting down the days to summer, eager to reconnect with her workaholic husband at their cozy rental cottage in the Hamptons. But soon a mysterious crisis at Dave's work ruins their getaway plans. Paige is still figuring out how to handle the unexplained chill in her marriage when her troubled sister suddenly returns after a two-decade silence. Now, instead of enjoying the lazy summer days along the ocean, Paige is navigating the rocky waters of a forgotten bond with her sister in the sweltering city heat.
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Julia Whelan makes it worth the credit.
- By Ellen Zelda on 09-15-15
By: L. Alison Heller
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Domestic Violets
- A Novel
- By: Matthew Norman
- Narrated by: Todd McLaren
- Length: 11 hrs
- Unabridged
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Tom Violet always thought that by the time he turned 35, he’d have everything going for him. Fame. Fortune. A beautiful wife. A satisfying career as a successful novelist. A happy dog to greet him at the end of the day. The reality, though, is far different. He’s got a wife, but their problems are bigger than he can even imagine. And he’s written a novel, but the manuscript he’s slaved over for years is currently hidden in his desk drawer while his father, an actual famous writer, just won the Pulitzer Prize for Fiction. His career, such that it is, involves mind-numbing corporate buzzwords....
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What a rollicking ride!
- By Pamela Harvey on 08-13-11
By: Matthew Norman
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The Wangs vs. the World
- By: Jade Chang
- Narrated by: Nancy Wu
- Length: 14 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
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Charles Wang is mad at America. A brash, lovable immigrant businessman who built a cosmetics empire and made a fortune, he's just been ruined by the financial crisis. Now all Charles wants is to get his kids safely stowed away so that he can go to China and attempt to reclaim his family's ancestral lands - and his pride. Outrageously funny and full of charm, The Wangs vs. the World is an entirely fresh look at what it means to belong in America - and how going from glorious riches to (still name-brand) rags brings one family together in a way money never could.
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Spectacular
- By Barbara on 10-11-16
By: Jade Chang
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Falling Together
- A Novel
- By: Marisa de los Santos
- Narrated by: Julia Gibson
- Length: 14 hrs and 18 mins
- Unabridged
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It’s been six years since Pen Calloway watched her best friends walk out of her life. And through the birth of her daughter, the death of her father, and the vicissitudes of single motherhood, she has never stopped missing them. Pen, Cat, and Will met on their first day of college and formed what seemed like a magical and lifelong bond, only to see their friendship break apart amid the realities of adulthood. When, after years of silence, Cat - the bewitching, charismatic center of their group - e-mails Pen and Will with an urgent request to meet at their college reunion, they can’t refuse.
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Narrator's breathy voice a turn off
- By Amy on 10-16-11
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The Life List
- A Novel
- By: Lori Nelson Spielman
- Narrated by: Rebecca Gibel
- Length: 11 hrs and 33 mins
- Unabridged
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Brett Bohlinger has forgotten all about the list of life goals she’d written as a naïve teenager. In fact, at 34, Brett seems to have it all—a plum job at her family’s multimillion-dollar company and a spacious loft with her irresistibly handsome boyfriend. But when her beloved mother, Elizabeth, passes away, Brett’s world is turned upside down. Rather than simply naming her daughter the new CEO of Bohlinger Cosmetics, Elizabeth’s will comes with one big stipulation: Brett must fulfill the list of childhood dreams she made so long ago.
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Truly Terrible.
- By Cricket on 04-27-14
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Purple Hearts
- A Novel
- By: Tess Wakefield
- Narrated by: Kyle Mason, Shayna Thibodeaux
- Length: 10 hrs and 28 mins
- Unabridged
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Cassie Salazar and Luke Morrow couldn't be more different. Sharp-witted Cassie works nights at a bar in Austin, Texas, to make ends meet while pursuing her dream of becoming a singer/songwriter. Luke is an army trainee, about to ship out for duty, who finds comfort in the unswerving discipline of service. But a chance encounter at Cassie's bar changes the course of both their lives.
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RATING PURPLE HEARTS BOOK VS PURPLE HEARTS MOVIE
- By Rozzy on 02-05-23
By: Tess Wakefield
What listeners say about Chainsaw Honeymoon
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- bluepits73
- 11-25-18
Cute
I liked this cute second chance type romance. I loved how the author orchestrates the 'second chance' for the couple. Interestingly enough, it is primarily from the perspective of the couple's daughter Ruby. Ruby is a very well developed character and she is easy to relate to.
My biggest and only complaint was that this novel was labelled as a 'romantic comedy', but I didn't really think it was funny enough to be placed in this category. I, as the listener, could very much be the problem. Perhaps I don't have the right sense of humor. Perhaps I didn't have a good understanding of the context or of references that would make it funny (kind of like not being in on an 'inside' joke). This does not mean that I didn't find some scenes grin worthy, I just thought that I would have genuinely laughed out loud. So, to me, this book kind of fails in the comedy department.
However, in the romance department, this book succeeds. I thought the structure of the book made it a really good second chance romance; and I was still very much entertained by this novel and I enjoyed listening. This was a very cute easy listen that kept my attention throughout.
I thought the narrator did a pretty good job, however, I don't think the narrator distinguished their voice enough when changing points of views or changing characters. I found myself thinking multiple times throughout "wait, which character is this supposed to be?", I didn't automatically know based on voice association.
I received a review copy at my request and have voluntarily left this unbiased review.
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- Catrina P
- 11-21-18
Chainsaw Honeymoon
Ruby is a typical teenager. She has her friends, her dog, her horror movies but what she really wants is for her parents to get back together. What lengths will she go to, to get what she wants?
This book was a little different from my typical listens. I found myself getting easily distracted. I did appreciate the twist at the end.
I was given this free review copy audiobook at my request and I have voluntarily left this review.
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- Shanna Tidwell
- 11-27-18
Super cute story!
This was a super cute, witty story about a spunky 14 year old named Ruby. She’s trying like all teens would to help get her parents back together.
Her dad has some wild ideas about how to win Stacy back. His brother is a bit of a con artist but must have some good in him.
I enjoyed all of the characters and the story.
Narration was good. It started with what I thought would be sound issues but that went away or I stopped noticing.
All in all a good clean, not scary, cute book that would also be good for teens or preteens.
I was voluntarily provided this review copy at no charge by the author, publisher and or narrator.
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- B. Lane
- 02-28-19
OH! MY! GAWD! BAD!
The description for this book sounded like it would be a lot of fun. Maybe it is as a read since you can set your own pace.
This book was juvenile, slow, and has a bad narrator. I found myself uninterested in what was happening and easily distracted, sometimes annoyed by the narrator. Long pauses in the middle of sentences or where commas should be, etc, making the meaning of the sentence different than intended. You'd have to say the sentence again in your head to realize what it really meant. The story is dull and not very interesting, also it shifts POV at times from first person (Ruby) to third person - not a good combination. If you're going to tell it in first person, keep it that way!
I was given this free review copy audiobook at my request and have voluntarily left this review.
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- Love my audiobook
- 11-21-18
Chainsaw
First let me say I wanted to like this audiobook. I didn't make it past the first few chapters. I stopped and started many times. I found myself getting easily distracted.It felt juvenile and slow. Valerie Mirachi's voice in the sample seemed okay. Please believe me when I say I don't like giving negative reviews.
I was given this free review copy audiobook at my request and I have voluntarily left this review.
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- Hudson the Basset
- 11-19-18
I Never Knew That Chainsaws Could Be Fun
This is a funny, original, and quirky book (with a great title) that I really liked. Mix a precocious kid, Ruby, who loves horror movies and parents on the verge of divorce and you have a recipe for wacky mayhem. I feel that it is impossible for me to give a synopsis of the story. The book is so unique that a precis of the tale would not do it justice and it might spoil some of the fun.
Valarie Mirarchi did a great job as narrator.
A free copy was provided in exchange for an honest review.
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- rachel pohler
- 11-21-18
Chainsaw Chuck!!!
This was a cute story. lol The story is told from a teenagers point of view. Her parents are separated and she's trying to help them. It was an entertaining story that I loved. I don't want to give too much away...But I really loved how things ended for people who might have been obstacles..hahahah Too funny. This was a great lighthearted book (despite what you may think based on the title) And I very much enjoyed listening to this on my commute to and from work.
I was given this free review copy audiobook at my request and have voluntarily left this review
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