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Forced to Marry Him

A Lifetime of Tradition and the Will to Break It

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Forced to Marry Him

By: Davinder Kaur
Narrated by: Gill Mills
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About this listen

In the late 1980s, Davinder Kaur was forced to marry a man she didn't know. When she was only fourteen years old, the marriage was arranged and set to occur when she turned eighteen. After four long years of internal turmoil and despair, she had two choices: adhere to the customs and traditions of her family, or risk bringing dishonor to their home. Davinder didn't like either option, so she made a plan—a plan to survive.

In Forced to Marry Him: A Lifetime of Tradition and the Will to Break It, Kaur tells of the pain, lies, and betrayal she suffered at the hands of those who were meant to protect her the most. But her story doesn't end there. Davinder's willingness to speak out and fight not only saved her life but the lives of many other women and young girls over the years. She offers courage and strength to those who can't advocate for themselves, and she works with organizations all over the world to help end arranged and forced marriages. Kaur gives a voice to the voiceless as she breaks down walls to eradicate cultural and traditional abuse.

©2021, 2022 Davinder Kaur (P)2024 Davinder Kaur
Domestic Partner Abuse Dysfunctional Families Marriage & Long-Term Partnerships Personal Success Marriage
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Important read - a worldwide problem

In 1998, my best friend’s sister was arranged to marry another Punjabi; however, before the marriage took place, she took her own life because she was forbidden to marry the love of her life, a Hindu. While this was extreme and very sad, even more shocking is this occurred in the United States.
Davinder’s story fortunately did not end this way, but it eloquently and beautifully speaks to the atrocities of forced marriage and the determination of many like herself to end such practices.

I purchased the audiobook version along with the eBook with Whispersync as I like to switch between the two due to my busy schedule. However, I found Ms. Mills’ narration so captivating that I had listened to the entire book after only reading a portion of it.

This is a must read, not only for Davinder’s story, but as an example of how one’s will to pursue happiness, disregarding an outdated cultural tradition. As the great Margaret Mead said, “Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed, citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has.”

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"This Plight is Very Real."

Forced to Marry Him by Davinder Kaur is a powerful and inspiring memoir that sheds light on the dark reality of forced and arranged marriages. Kaur's vivid and raw storytelling takes readers on an emotional journey through her own traumatic experience of being forced to marry a man she didn't know at the age of eighteen, and the complex cultural nuances that support such practices.

Kaur's courage to speak out against child marriage despite the potential repercussions and severed familial ties is truly remarkable. Her bravery in breaking the silence and exposing the truth about the harmful effects of cultural and traditional abuse is inspiring.

I particularly appreciated Kaur's ability to provide visceral descriptions of the pain and parental betrayal she suffered at the hands of those who were meant to protect her while delivering the "harsh realities" in an authentic, humane, and blunt manner. Her honesty and openness about the emotional toll of her experiences make the reader feel a connection to her and the broader issue of forced and arranged marriages. Additionally, her resilience and determination to survive and thrive in the face of adversity is a testament to the strength of the human spirit.

Overall, Forced to Marry Him is a compelling and deeply moving memoir that sheds light on a critical issue facing many women and girls around the world. Kaur's courage, determination, and advocacy work serve as an inspiration to all who read her story.

Thank you, Davinder, for sharing your experiences with such confidence and vulnerability, allowing the reader to walk in shoes that no one should have to wear. Your book has made me more empathetic, aware, and poised to speak with confidence on the topic and ally your efforts – as we all should.

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Powerful Message and Story

This is a story about Davinder Kaur who was forced to marry a man she did not know or desire to have in her life. This is a story focused on cultural beliefs about honor, obeying parents, and being faithful to a traditional thought/belief that is all too often deadly to a woman. Davinder’s own words, the words of a survivor, we hear about her fears, struggles, and more.

Davinder Kaur, the author, describes the situation she finds herself in with rich words that communicate the fear, pain, and horror but allows her to keep her dignity. Her struggle to be her own woman and the struggles she encounters when her mother willfully manipulates her placing her in deadly danger is brought to life vividly. Her ability after all she has encountered to act as an advocate and mouthpiece to stop the honor killings and forced marriages is amazing.

The narrator, Gill Mills also brings to life the book with her rich tones and unique voice. She speaks clearly and vibrantly while performing this moving book. Her flawless performance enhances the story.

This can be an uncomfortable story for some, but it is well worth the listen, and I can guarantee you will think about Davinder and her story long after the close of the book.

There were no issues with the production or quality of this audiobook.

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