If Democrats Had Any Brains, They'd Be Republicans Audiobook By Ann Coulter cover art

If Democrats Had Any Brains, They'd Be Republicans

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About this listen

"Uttering lines that send liberals into paroxysms of rage, otherwise known as 'citing facts', is the spice of life. When I see the hot spittle flying from their mouths and the veins bulging and pulsing above their eyes, well, that's when I feel truly alive."

So begins If Democrats Had Any Brains, They'd Be Republicans, Ann Coulter's funniest, most devastating, and, yes, most outrageous audiobook to date. Coulter has become the brightest star in the conservative firmament thanks to her razor-sharp reasoning and biting wit. Of course, practically any time she opens her mouth, liberal elites denounce Ann, insisting that "She's gone too far!" and hopefully predicting that this time it will bring a crashing end to her career.

Now you can listen to all the quotes that have so outraged her enemies and so delighted her legions of fans. More than just the definitive collection of Coulterisms, If Democrats Had Any Brains, They'd Be Republicans includes dozens of brand-new commentaries written by Coulter and hundreds of never-before-published quotations.

This is Ann at her best, covering every topic from A to Z. Here you’ll hear Coulter’s take on:

  • Her politics: “As far as I’m concerned, I’m a middle-of-the-road moderate and the rest of you are crazy.”
  • Hillary Clinton: “Hillary wants to be the first woman president, which would also make her the first woman in a Clinton administration to sit behind the desk in the Oval Office instead of under it.”
  • The environment: “God gave us the earth. We have dominion over the plants, the animals, the trees. God said, ‘Earth is yours. Take it. Rape it. It’s yours.’”
  • Religion: “It’s become increasingly difficult to distinguish the pronouncements of the Episcopal Church from the latest Madonna video.”
  • Global warming: “The temperature of the planet has increased about one degree Fahrenheit in the last century. So imagine a summer afternoon when it’s 63 degrees and the next thing you know it’s... 64 degrees. Ahhhh!!!! Run for your lives, everybody! Women and children first!”
  • Gun control: “Mass murderers apparently can’t read, since they are constantly shooting up ‘gun-free zones.’
  • Bill Clinton: “Bill Clinton’s library is the first one to ever feature an Adults Only section.”
  • Illegal aliens: “I am the illegal alien of commentary. I will do the jokes that no one else will do.”

If Democrats Had Any Brains, They’d Be Republicans is a must-have for anyone who loves (or loves to hate) Ann Coulter.

©2007 Ann Coulter (P)2007 Random House, Inc. Random House Audio, a division of Random House, Inc.
Conservatism & Liberalism Political Science Politics & Government Funny Witty
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What listeners say about If Democrats Had Any Brains, They'd Be Republicans

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  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars

Coulter at her best

Typically acerbic Coulter humor. At once, insightful, bitingly wicked, and hilarious. It would simply be funny if so much of it was not true. If you are from the left side of the aisle you better put on your thick skin. Likely though, if you are you haven't shelled out the coin for this book.

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2 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars

right

she is always right... thats hard to find in a woman

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2 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

Excellent !

Insightful, funny, true, observant, honest, fearless, inspiring, exciting, captivating, entertaining, brave, informative, enjoyable and affordable !

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  • Overall
    3 out of 5 stars
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    2 out of 5 stars
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    3 out of 5 stars

Opposing voice

Any additional comments?

I like to hear political views that are not mine. However, Ann Coulter is not so much giving arguments for her position as she is being witty and selling herself. Her favorite line is: I rest my case.
And, I'm afraid I don't like her voice.
So, despite the sometime hilarious parts, not my cup of tea.

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1 person found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

Brilliant sarcasm deflates foolish pomposity

Ann Coulter's mercilessly evocative designation of Katie Couric as "the Eva Braun of morning television" was as apt a thumbnail epitaph as Couric is likely to inspire. Couric should have feigned cheerful outrage at her new avatar, while taking every back-handed measure to ensure that it stuck, on the principle that it is better to be famous for having an offensively funny nickname than not to be famous. An appropriate response might have been for Couric to smilingly compliment Coulter's full-throated and biting sarcasm, thus further chilling the cycle of obscurely nasty innuendo which, we all know, is best served cold. Coulter's last chapter has her delivering a witheringly hilarious rapid-fire standup comedy routine, attacking all of her adversaries, ranging from simple-minded liberals to jealously less-successful conservative pundits, who turn out to be her main opposition. Coulter's political drone strikes are launched with all of their usual laser-guided precision, but, in this book, her collateral humor seems to be an order of magnitude more devastating. In other words, I laughed out loud for hours listening to this audiobook. My highest recommendation.

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  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars

Ann gets an A for RESEARCH

Ann Coulter's books are the most accurate history books and should be required reading for all political science students. Requardless of your political leanings,if you check out her footnotes (like I did) you will find them all correct. That is why she is so disliked by those who don't agree with her politics- she backs up her opinions with facts, and facts don't lie. Something we rarely see in the media these days.

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4 people found this helpful

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    3 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars
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    3 out of 5 stars

Not everyone's cup of tea but an entertaining book

she's way to the right of me but she's no fool she's no pushover and she's very entertaining. I had to check out the book that I had requested that a clerk continue to display while under the pressure of intense customer harassment and Hysteria

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  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars

Its the ABRIDGED version...

That's my only beef. I happen to love Ann and her political views and look forward to each book. I was just stunned when I noticed that this was only 3 hours long, my mistake! I guess I just have to wait for the unabridged version to get the full-flavor of Ann's latest opinions.

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17 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars

Great book

Great book!! Just one thing Mitt Romney is a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Ladder Day Saints. A very good Christian.

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1 person found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

Unabridged truth delivered with unrivaled wit.

I'm so glad Ann narrated this book herself. No one else could have done it justice.

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