If I Told You, I'd Have to Kiss You
A Novel
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Narrated by:
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Mia Hutchison-Shaw
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By:
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Mae Marvel
About this listen
Ms. and Ms. Smith meets The Pairing in this heart-racing romance of secrets, spies, and steam.
A few rules for the international superspy:
(1) Never blow your cover.
(2) Never accept the first plan.
(3) Never fall for anyone at the agency. Especially if she’s your ex-girlfriend.
Yardley Whitmer, code name “the Unicorn,” can do no wrong. She’s honed her spycraft and become an instant legend in the field. If only breaking up with her girlfriend were as easy as rappelling off the Eiffel Tower. Living a full-time cover story has slowly eroded her relationship until there’s nothing left but lies.
KC “Tabasco” Nolan, hacker extraordinaire, can crack any code—except the one that would tell her the right moment to confess her secret job to Yardley. Now it’s too late, and she’s in danger of losing the best chance at love she’s ever had.
When an undercover shakedown goes wrong, Yardley and KC discover the unbelievable truth—that they’ve both been working at the agency for years. To salvage the mission, they partner up and fly across oceans, race through winding European streets, and give in to inconvenient passion while hiding in an ambassador’s linen closet. But can they throw away their rules and fight through their secrets to fall in love with each other’s true selves?
A Macmillan Audio production from St. Martin’s Press.
©2025 Mae Marvel (P)2025 Macmillan AudioListeners also enjoyed...
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Critic reviews
Most Anticipated by Goodreads
“The international intrigue and well-plotted action sequences evoke James Bond, but the story keeps a sense of cozy sweetness at its core and wears its politics on its sleeve, extolling the virtues of diversity, public service, and queer love. It’s a delightful diversion.”—Publishers Weekly, Starred Review
“Engrossing and highly unique… This slow-burn, fascinating novel reads like a spy thriller that is laced with angst and sexual tension… an exciting addition to the sapphic genre.”—Booklist
"The action is fast, and their inconvenient make-out/make-up sessions are hot, while the covert operation is expertly woven through the romance. Marvel sends readers on a thrilling ride in this steamy spy romance.”—Library Journal
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- By Jay on 05-19-25
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Nobody in Particular
- By: Sophie Gonzales
- Narrated by: Gail Shalan, Imani Jade Powers
- Length: 11 hrs and 57 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
When somebody sees something they shouldn’t and rumors circulate throughout Henland, Rose and Danni must either find a way to deflect the ever-increasing eyes on their relationship, or end it altogether. Because one thing is clear: if Rose’s fragile reputation takes any more hits, the palace will do whatever they must to separate Rose and Danni. Forever.
By: Sophie Gonzales
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For Love and Blood and Fury
- Lilith's Legacy, Book 1
- By: J.J. Arias
- Narrated by: Kingsley Rose
- Length: 11 hrs
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Elena, the head of Miami's vampire cartel, never expected her ex-girlfriend Zuri—a powerful witch—to storm back into her life demanding help with a rival coven. Seeing Zuri again, Elena knows she would do anything for the woman she once shared scorching nights and dark secrets with. But before Elena can act, betrayal strikes, leaving her wounded and trapped in a human hospital with no memory of her attack. Desperate and vulnerable, Elena clings to Marisol—a nurse with potent healing abilities she barely understands.
By: J.J. Arias
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With Stars in Her Eyes
- A Novel
- By: Andie Burke
- Length: 10 hrs and 18 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Seconds from a meteoric career launch, cellist Courtney Starling suffers a frightening migraine attack during a key performance. While harmful rumors fly, she escapes to her happy place—her best friend’s Kansas bookshop. Courtney’s working incognito when a scream sends her leaping off a shelving ladder to find the woman who screamed cowering near the register.
By: Andie Burke
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A Rare Find
- By: Joanna Lowell
- Narrated by: Ros Watt
- Length: 13 hrs
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Elfreda Marsden has finally made a major discovery—an ancient amulet proving the Viking army camped on her family’s estate. Too bad her nemesis is back from London, freshly exiled after a scandal and ready to wreak havoc on her life. Georgie Redmayne is everything Elfreda isn’t—charming, popular, carefree, distractingly attractive, and bored to death by the countryside. When the two collide (literally), the amulet is lost, and with it, Elfreda’s big chance to lead a proper excavation.
By: Joanna Lowell
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Bed and Breakup
- A Novel
- By: Susie Dumond
- Narrated by: Kimberly M. Wetherell, Jeremy Carlisle Parker
- Length: 13 hrs
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
As newlyweds, Molly and Robin made the Hummingbird Inn into a trendy destination for queer travelers in the quirky mountain town of Eureka Springs, Arkansas. But when their career ambitions drove them apart, the young couple separated, handed over the property’s upkeep to a management firm, and never looked back. Seven years later, Molly and Robin return to the Hummingbird Inn for very different reasons. Molly is an artist on the rise who’s been commissioned to create pieces in Eureka Springs; Robin is a celebrity chef whose restaurants have gone belly-up.
By: Susie Dumond
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Love in Focus
- By: Lyla Lee
- Narrated by: Natalie Naudus, Catherine Ho
- Length: 7 hrs and 40 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Story
When her boyfriend of seven years suddenly breaks up with her, relationship advice columnist Gemma Cho is convinced that real love doesn’t exist. As a bisexual woman who’s had zero luck with both men and women, she’s ready to give up on her own romantic prospects. That is, until she's paired up with world-renowned photographer Celeste Min on a potentially career-saving piece on modern love.
By: Lyla Lee