Leaving the Saints
How I Lost the Mormons and Found My Faith
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Narrated by:
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Martha Beck
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By:
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Martha Beck
About this listen
Leaving the Saints is an unforgettable memoir about one woman’s spiritual quest and journey toward faith. As “Mormon royalty” within the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, Martha Beck was raised in a home frequented by the Church’s high elders—known as the apostles—and her existence was framed by their strict code of conduct. Wearing her sacred garments, she married in a secret temple ceremony—but only after two Mormon leaders ascertained that her “past contained no flirtation with serious sins, such as committing murder or drinking coffee.” She went to church faithfully with the other brothers and sisters of her ward. When her son was born with Down syndrome, she and her husband left their graduate programs at Harvard to return to Provo, Utah, where they knew the supportive Mormon community would embrace them.
However, soon after Martha began teaching at Brigham Young University, she began to see firsthand the Church’s ruthlessness as it silenced dissidents and masked truths that contradicted its published beliefs. Most troubling of all, she was forced to face her history of sexual abuse by one of the Church’s most prominent authorities. This book chronicles her difficult decision to sever her relationship with the faith that had cradled her for so long and to confront and forgive the person who betrayed her so deeply. This beautifully written, inspiring memoir explores the powerful yearning toward faith. It offers a rare glimpse inside one of the world’s most secretive religions while telling a profoundly moving story of personal courage, survival, and the transformative power of spirituality.
©2005 Martha Beck (P)2005 Random House, Inc. Random House Audio, a divsion of Random House, Inc.Listeners also enjoyed...
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Critic reviews
"Martha Beck’s riveting memoir teaches us more about love, spirituality, trauma, truth telling, and hope than all the self-help books combined. It is one of the bravest, most achingly honest books I’ve read in years. Leaving the Saints is a priceless gift.” —Harriet Lerner, Ph.D., author of The Dance of Anger
“A courageous, touching, and beautifully written spiritual journey of the heart. I applaud Martha’s candidness and perseverance in her steadfast pursuit of the power of love.” —Judith Orloff, M.D., author of Positive Energy and Dr. Judith Orloff’s Guide to Intuitive Healing
“Leaving the Saints is a brave book. Martha Beck shares her journey out of religion and into faith and healing with heartbreaking candor, softened by wit and uplifted by a deep spiritual longing.” —Sharon Salzberg, author of Faith: Trusting Your Own Deepest Experience
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Wow I'm so glad I read this. I had no idea.
- By Michelle Pierce on 05-06-15
By: Ranya Idliby, and others
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The Imam's Daughter
- My Desperate Flight to Freedom
- By: Hannah Shah
- Narrated by: Christine Rendel
- Length: 6 hrs and 52 mins
- Unabridged
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Hannah Shah is an Imam's daughter. She lived the life of a devout Muslim in a family of Pakistani Muslims in England, but behind the front door, she was a caged butterfly. For many years, her father abused her in the cellar of their home. At 16, she discovered a plan to send her to Pakistan for an arranged marriage, and she gathered the courage to run away. Relentlessly hunted by her angry father and brothers, who were intent on executing an "honor" killing, she moved from house to house in perpetual fear to escape them.
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only half of the story is in Audible!
- By ellen on 02-09-11
By: Hannah Shah
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Encountering Heaven and the Afterlife
- True Stories from People Who Have Glimpsed the World Beyond
- By: James L. Garlow, Keith Wall
- Narrated by: James L. Garlow
- Length: 8 hrs and 6 mins
- Unabridged
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What happens when we die? What is heaven really like? When we arrive, will we know people? What role do angels play in our lives? Can the amazing experiences of everyday people reveal insights into life “on the other side”? Trusted pastor Jim Garlow and experienced journalist Keith Wall believe they can.
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Don't waste your time
- By Mary on 08-21-10
By: James L. Garlow, and others
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Shanda
- A Memoir of Shame and Secrecy
- By: Letty Cottin Pogrebin
- Narrated by: Dina Pearlman
- Length: 14 hrs and 5 mins
- Unabridged
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The word "shanda" is defined as shame or disgrace in Yiddish. This book, Shanda, tells the story of three generations of complicated, intense twentieth-century Jews for whom the desire to fit in and the fear of public humiliation either drove their aspirations or crushed their spirit. In her deeply engaging, astonishingly candid memoir, author and activist Letty Cottin Pogrebin exposes the fiercely-guarded lies and intricate cover-ups woven by dozens of members of her extended family.
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Beautifully Written!
- By Adele Aron Greenspun on 01-12-23
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Still Waiting
- Hope for When God Doesn't Give You What You Want
- By: Ann Swindell
- Narrated by: Ann Swindell
- Length: 6 hrs and 17 mins
- Unabridged
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Most of us know what it's like to wait for God to change our circumstances. But whether we're waiting for physical healing, an emotional breakthrough, or better relationships, waiting is something we usually try to avoid. Why? Because waiting is painful and hard. The truth is it's also inevitable. In Still Waiting, Ann Swindell explores the depths of why God wants us to wait by chronicling her own compelling story of waiting for healing from an incurable condition.
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Amazing
- By Raquel on 06-14-17
By: Ann Swindell
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A Fractured Mind
- My Life with Multiple Personality Disorder
- By: Robert B. Oxnam
- Narrated by: William Dufris
- Length: 9 hrs and 16 mins
- Unabridged
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At the peak of his professional career, after having led the Asia Society for nearly a decade, Oxnam was haunted by periodic blackouts and episodic rages. After his family and friends intervened, Oxnam received help from a psychiatrist, Dr. Jeffery Smith, and entered a rehab center. It wasn't until 1990, during a session with Dr. Smith, that the first of Oxnam's 11 alternate personalities, an angry young boy named Tommy, suddenly emerged.
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A solid look at a rare disorder
- By O. Canosa on 11-23-07
By: Robert B. Oxnam
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Philomena
- A Mother, Her Son, and a Fifty-Year Search
- By: Martin Sixsmith
- Narrated by: John Curless
- Length: 15 hrs and 33 mins
- Unabridged
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Now a major motion picture directed by Stephen Frears ( The Queen, High Fidelity) and starring Judi Dench ( Skyfall, Notes on a Scandal) and Steve Coogan ( The Trip, Hamlet 2): the heartbreaking true story of an Irishwoman and the secret she kept for 50 years. When she became pregnant as a teenager in Ireland in 1952, Philomena Lee was sent to a convent to be looked after as a "fallen woman". Then the nuns took her baby from her and sold him, like thousands of others, to America for adoption. Fifty years later, Philomena decided to find him.
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Very Moving Story
- By Cariola on 02-09-14
By: Martin Sixsmith
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Fire Road
- The Napalm Girl's Journey Through the Horrors of War to Faith, Forgiveness, and Peace
- By: Kim Phuc Phan Thi, Ashley Wiersma
- Narrated by: Emily Woo Zeller
- Length: 9 hrs and 40 mins
- Unabridged
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Get out! Run! We must leave this place! They are going to destroy this whole place! Go, children, run first! Go now! These were the final shouts nine-year-old Kim Phuc heard before her world dissolved into flames - before napalm bombs fell from the sky, burning away her clothing and searing deep into her skin. It's a moment forever captured, an iconic image that has come to define the horror and violence of the Vietnam War. Kim was left for dead in a morgue; no one expected her to survive the attack. Napalm meant fire, and fire meant death.
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The subtitle should warn what the book is
- By Rex Michael Dillon on 01-27-19
By: Kim Phuc Phan Thi, and others
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Stolen Innocence
- My Story of Growing Up in a Polygamous Sect, Becoming a Teenage Bride, and Breaking Free of Warren Jeffs
- By: Elissa Wall, Lisa Pulitzer
- Narrated by: Renée Raudman
- Length: 15 hrs and 50 mins
- Unabridged
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In September 2007, Elissa Wall, the star witness against polygamous sect leader Warren Jeffs, gave captivating testimony of how Jeffs forced her to marry her first cousin at age 14. This harrowing account proved to be the most compelling evidence against Jeffs, showing the harsh realities of this closed community and the lengths to which Jeffs went in order to control the sect's women. Now, in this courageous memoir, Wall tells the incredible story of how she emerged from the confines of the Fundamentalist Church of Latter Day Saints and helped bring one of America's most notorious criminals to justice.
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Chris from Cedar City, UT USA
- By Christine on 06-14-08
By: Elissa Wall, and others
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Schuyler's Monster
- A Father's Journey with His Wordless Daughter
- By: Robert Rummel-Hudson
- Narrated by: Johnathan McClain
- Length: 9 hrs and 10 mins
- Unabridged
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When Schuyler Rummel-Hudson was 18 months old, a question about her lack of speech by her pediatrician set in motion a journey that continues today. When she was diagnosed with bilateral perisylvian polymicrogyria (an extremely rare neurological disorder), her parents were given a name for the monster that had been stalking them from doctor to doctor, and from despair to hope, and back again.
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Must-read for medical parents & those who ❤them
- By Kelly A. Wolske on 05-23-18
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Modern Loss
- Candid Conversation About Grief. Beginners Welcome.
- By: Rebecca Soffer, Gabrielle Birkner
- Narrated by: Meredith Mitchell, Josh Bloomberg
- Length: 7 hrs and 40 mins
- Unabridged
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At a time when we mourn public figures and national tragedies with hashtags, where intimate posts about loss go viral and we receive automated birthday reminders for dead friends, it's clear we are navigating new terrain without a road map. Let's face it: Most of us have always had a difficult time talking about death and sharing our grief. We're awkward and uncertain; we avoid, ignore, or even deny feelings of sadness; we offer platitudes; we send sympathy bouquets whittled out of fruit.
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Not What I Was Expecting
- By Bessie Mae on 03-01-23
By: Rebecca Soffer, and others
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Can't Forgive
- My 20-Year Battle with O.J. Simpson
- By: Kim Goldman
- Narrated by: Kim Goldman
- Length: 8 hrs and 2 mins
- Unabridged
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When Kim Goldman was just 22, her older brother, Ron, was brutally killed by O. J. Simpson. Ron and Kim were very close, and her devastation was compounded by the shocking not guilty verdict that allowed a smirking Simpson to leave as a free man.
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Selfish
- By B. A. C. on 04-08-16
By: Kim Goldman
What listeners say about Leaving the Saints
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Breanna
- 07-21-23
Thank you Martha
This book helped me in my journey to set myself once and for all free.
Thank you Martha
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- Julie Seal
- 08-27-22
Very thought provoking
I’m an active Mormon who loves my community. I loved this book. It read very honestly. I would love to talk to this woman. I have great empathy and respect for her journey. I respected her father too. I think part of being an adult is the understanding that there is no wisdom without mistakes or pain. She’s got both in her family. She’s smart and writes well. I listened to this in one day because it was riveting. That’s probably more true because I know the people mentioned.
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Overall
- Sandi
- 07-03-05
Read it and decide for yourself
I found this to be a riveting story and as a third generation Utah Mormon I found her depiction of Mormon culture to be right on. I was raised in Utah, graduated from BYU and served a mission for the LDS Church, and in my opinion, Martha Beck is just telling it like it is. Anyone wanting a glimpse inside the faith will find her account interesting and perhaps disturbing, but just because you don't like the message why shoot the messenger? I found her personal revelations believable and backed up with strong physical evidence despite family denials. I think people should listen to her well written story and decide for themselves.
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47 people found this helpful
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- wendibird
- 01-22-23
Calming and inspiring
I was at BYU in the 80s and lived in SLC in the 90s and witnessed first hand the covert set ups and purges of alleged homosexuals in the arts department’s and the intellectuals in science and psychology and history. I drove gay friends to SLC to get electo shock aversion therapy at the urging of therapists in the student counseling center who convinced them this was the only thing they could do to keep the love of their families. I had a roommate kicked out of school for getting raped. I was the person who collected urine samples from student athletes in the student health center for drug testing and would have to turn over the tray of actual samples to one of the football coaches and accept the “clean” tray he brought to the lab from his van. I didn’t grow up Mormon in Utah and being at BYU with the “faithful and elite” absolutely ended my faith or commitment to that religion or system. Most Mormons are wonderful people. But the system protects the system. What Martha reported was just a tiny bit of the pathological crazy hypocrisy that exists there. Now as a therapist in Utah I often cringe when a hear the last name of a wannabe new client. As I know Just from their last name or maiden name that sessions will be about childhood sexual trauma. Not one thing she said surprised me. Not one. Although I have enormous admiration for the hard work she has put in in order to live in integrity.
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- Anonymous User
- 08-15-18
Fascinating and Inspiring
There were parts that were hard to listen to(due to their nature not the storytelling),but her story is remarkable and inspirational.
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1 person found this helpful
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- Gilbert J. Bradshaw
- 07-07-05
Not very good
I don't have much to say. I thought that the reader was great, and I love Martha Beck--but this book was not written at the standard of "Expecting Adam." In fact, I kind of got the impression that her story was a little bit on the bogus side. I was quite disappointed.
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19 people found this helpful
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- Yigosh
- 02-02-17
I am an exmormon and even I did not like that book
Any additional comments?
First of all, first three hours of this abridged version is unnecessary. So I cannot even start to imagine how unnecessary was the unabridged version. I feel like nothing in the LDS theology bothered her and she wouldn't even have any problems with the pearl of great price if her did not abuse her.
I would love to hear more her spiritual experience after she left and less about her dealings with trauma.
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1 person found this helpful
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- Judy
- 08-12-05
Terrible
Martha Back has a flair for the dramatic and cares nothing about the truth! I read her book, and her personal life details aside (who knows what the truth is about that stuff) it is filled with lies about the Mormon church to make it look ridiculous. Her whole tale about "leaving the saints" is a bunch of baloney because she never believed in God most of her life anyway. You might read this book for the entertaining aspects as a pure work of fiction. It is full of lies and is just ridiculous!
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20 people found this helpful
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- amazonman
- 03-17-05
What a pile of tripe
Biased, bitter, bigoted and totally misleading. If you want listen to someone's self-absorbed whines, go for it.
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32 people found this helpful
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- Joel
- 07-05-05
What does her family think of this one?
A quick search at google for "Martha Beck's family" will retrieve her 7 siblings response to her book. They all seem to disagree about this being classified as non-fiction.
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20 people found this helpful