My Government Means to Kill Me
A Novel
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Narrated by:
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Jelani Alladin
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By:
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Rasheed Newson
About this listen
2022 New York Times Book Review Notable Books of the Year, Long-listed
2022 The Philadelphia Inquirer Best Books of the Year, Long-listed
This program is read by actor, singer, and dancer Jelani Alladin, who originated the role of Kristoff in Broadway's Frozen musical.
A fierce and riveting queer coming-of-age story following the personal and political awakening of a young gay Black man in 1980s New York City, from the television drama writer and producer of The Chi, Narcos, and Bel-Air
“Full of joy and righteous anger, sex and straight talk, brilliant storytelling and humor, Rasheed Newson’s debut novel has given us the story of Trey, set against the history of 80s queer Black New York, AIDS, and the movements that changed the era. A spectacularly researched Dickensian tale with vibrant characters and dozens of famous cameos, it is precisely the book we’ve needed for a long time. That—and a rollicking read! What more could you want?” —Andrew Sean Greer, Pulitzer Prize-winning author of Less
Born into a wealthy Black Indianapolis family, Earl “Trey” Singleton III leaves his overbearing parents and their expectations behind by running away to New York City with only a few dollars in his pocket. In the city, Trey meets up with a cast of characters that changes his life forever. He volunteers at a renegade home hospice for AIDS patients, and after being put to the test by gay rights activists, becomes a member of the AIDS Coalition to Unleash Power (ACT UP). Along the way Trey attempts to navigate past traumas and searches for ways to maintain familial relationships—all while seeking the meaning of life amid so much death.
Vibrant, humorous, and fraught with entanglements, Rasheed Newson’s My Government Means to Kill Me is an exhilarating, fast-paced coming-of-age story that lends itself to a larger discussion about what it means for a young gay Black man in the mid-1980s to come to terms with his role in the midst of a political and social reckoning.
A Macmillan Audio production from Flatiron Books.
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- By: A. M. Arthur
- Narrated by: Tyler Stevens
- Length: 8 hrs
- Unabridged
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Jonas needs Tate. He just doesn't know it yet. Or at least he doesn't want to admit it. Because there is no way Jonas Ashcroft is gay. He's a straight, carefree frat boy player, just like any good son of a conservative state senator. If only his struggle to convince everyone - especially himself - didn't leave him so miserable. No matter how many girls or bottles he drowns himself in, Jonas can neither escape nor accept who he is.
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A simple feel-good read.
- By Keith G on 12-28-17
By: A. M. Arthur
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Beautiful Addictions
- By: Season Vining
- Narrated by: Susannah Jones
- Length: 8 hrs and 53 mins
- Unabridged
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Josie Banks is a girl without a past. After being found unconscious with no memory, she was shuffled in and out of foster homes where she suffered years of abuse - an experience that left her broken, damaged, and clinging to drugs and meaningless hook-ups to numb her pain. When Josie disappeared years ago, she took a piece of Tristan with her. She’s the girl he thought he lost forever - the one he’s never been able to forget. Now a twist of fate has brought them back together, and he never wants to let her out of his inked arms again.
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you will feel so many emotions threw out this book
- By sydney on 06-12-14
By: Season Vining
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The Ritual Bath
- The First Peter Decker and Rina Lazarus Novel
- By: Faye Kellerman
- Narrated by: Mitchell Greenberg
- Length: 8 hrs and 9 mins
- Unabridged
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Detective Peter Decker of the LAPD is stunned when he gets the report. Someone has shattered the sanctuary of a remote yeshiva community in the California hills with an unimaginable crime. One of the women was brutally raped as she returned from the mikvah, the bathhouse where the cleansing ritual is performed.
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Good Read
- By Eva Gannon on 08-21-08
By: Faye Kellerman
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Santori
- By: Maris Black
- Narrated by: J.F. Harding
- Length: 7 hrs and 29 mins
- Unabridged
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Michael Kage Santori has just inherited a thriving hotel and millions of dollars. He’s poised to become an MMA champion. Things couldn’t be better between him and his college boy lover, Jamie Atwood - especially in the bedroom, where Jamie is more than eager to let Kage take out his aggressions on him. Kage seems to have it all, but success and happiness have come at a steep price. After all of the childhood trauma he endured at the hands of his controlling uncle, Peter Santori, it’s a miracle Kage has any shred of sanity left. And now, because of him, Jamie is a murderer.
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Oddly constructed but compelling serial installment
- By Cranky Reader on 04-13-19
By: Maris Black
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Boss
- By: Tracy Brown
- Narrated by: Cami Darian
- Length: 9 hrs and 42 mins
- Unabridged
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Crystal Scott has the world at her fingertips. Both at the height of her career at a wildly popular magazine and on the rise in an enviable social circle, she's beginning to think that maybe she can have it all. But her entire life, body, and soul are threatened when Troy Mitchell steps on the scene. Crystal has never felt the insatiable passion she feels for Troy - and it was certainly not part of her plan. Troy pursues her full throttle, making it impossible for her to resist.
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Couldn't Finish The Book
- By Evergreen on 06-26-17
By: Tracy Brown
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Too Bright to Hear Too Loud to See
- By: Juliann Garey
- Narrated by: Dan Butler
- Length: 11 hrs and 7 mins
- Unabridged
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In her tour-de-force first novel, Juliann Garey takes us inside the restless mind, ravaged heart, and anguished soul of Greyson Todd, a successful Hollywood studio executive who leaves his wife and young daughter and for a decade travels the world giving free reign to the bipolar disorder he's been forced to keep hidden for almost 20 years.
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Psychosis or Syphilis?
- By Vira on 04-02-13
By: Juliann Garey
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Tryin' To Sleep In the Bed You Made
- By: Virginia DeBerry, Donna Grant
- Narrated by: Fran L. Washington
- Length: 16 hrs and 24 mins
- Unabridged
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Gayle was the beauty who believed that a man could make her life complete. Patricia was the intellectual who thought that rising to the top of her career would make her happy. And then there is Marcus Carter, who has been linked to both Gayle and Pat since the tragedy that occurred when they were all children. Can either one save him from himself? Can friends survive a love that comes between them? Each of them gets what she wants, but no one counts on the price they have to pay.
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Better with each chapter!
- By Cyn B. on 02-09-16
By: Virginia DeBerry, and others
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The Widow of Wall Street
- A Novel
- By: Randy Susan Meyers
- Narrated by: Susan Bennett
- Length: 11 hrs and 19 mins
- Unabridged
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Phoebe has loved Jake Pierce since childhood, and that love continues without hesitation while she watches him create a financial dynasty. But when Phoebe learns that her husband's triumphs are the result of an elaborate Ponzi scheme, her world unravels. Lies underpin her life and marriage. And as Jake's crime is uncovered, the world obsesses over her. Did she know her gilded life was fabricated by fraud?
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Here's a Miracle: Sympathy for Ruth Madoff
- By Godwillen on 05-24-17
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Bright Lights, Big City
- By: Jay McInerney
- Narrated by: Daniel Passer
- Length: 5 hrs and 11 mins
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The tragicomedy of a young man in New York City, a writer, never named, who works as a fact-checker for a prestigious magazine. He struggles with the reality of his mother's death, alienation, and the seductive pull of drugs and a vibrant nightlife.
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Curiously, mundanely real
- By Amber on 01-07-12
By: Jay McInerney
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Lifted by the Great Nothing
- By: Karim Dimechkie
- Narrated by: Neil Shah
- Length: 8 hrs and 52 mins
- Unabridged
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Max doesn't remember his mother, who was murdered by burglars before they emigrated from Beirut to New Jersey. He lives with his father, Rasheed, who is enamored of his concept of American culture - baseball and barbeques - and tries to shed his Lebanese heritage completely.
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Excellent
- By Cheyenne on 06-13-15
By: Karim Dimechkie
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Queen Bee of Mimosa Branch
- By: Haywood Smith
- Narrated by: Anne Gartlan
- Length: 14 hrs and 14 mins
- Unabridged
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Southern housewife Linwood Breedlove Scott was happily content in her comfortable 30-year marriage, but when her husband cleans out their bank accounts and runs off with a stripper, her life takes a hilarious, yet touching, right turn into reality. With no place to go but home, she's forced back to her eccentric family she escaped by marrying at 19. But despite her newly dependent situation, Lin begins to stand on her own two feet and wake up to the joys - and perils - of life as a single woman.
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Haywood Smith is royal with this book!
- By Dave on 12-09-12
By: Haywood Smith
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32 Candles
- A Novel
- By: Ernessa T. Carter
- Narrated by: Adenrele Ojo
- Length: 11 hrs and 14 mins
- Unabridged
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Performance
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Davie—an ugly duckling growing up in small-town Mississippi—is positive her life couldn’t be any worse. She has the meanest mother in the South, possibly the world, and on top of that, she’s pretty sure she’s ugly. Just when she’s resigned herself to her fate, she sees a movie that will change her life— Sixteen Candles. But in her case, life doesn’t imitate art.
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2 High Fives - for Monkey Night
- By Nevada on 10-03-12
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No real account of black women physicians in the US exists, and what little mention is made of these women in existing histories is often insubstantial or altogether incorrect. In this work of extensive research, Jasmine Brown offers a rich new perspective, penning the long-erased stories of nine pioneering black women physicians beginning in 1860, when a black woman first entered medical school.
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Hippie
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In Hippie, he tells the story of Paulo, a young, skinny Brazilian man with a goatee and long, flowing hair, who dreams of becoming a writer, and Karla, a Dutch woman in her twenties who has been waiting to find a companion to accompany her on the fabled hippie trail to Nepal.
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Vivian Parry likes the dark. A former actress, she now works as the junior theater critic at a major Manhattan magazine. Her nights are spent beyond the lights, in a reserved seat, giving herself over to the shows she loves. By day, she savages them, with words sharper than a knife. Angling for a promotion, she reluctantly agrees to an interview, a conversation that reveals secrets she thought she had long since buried. Then her interviewer disappears and she learns―from his devastated fiancée―that she was the last person to have seen him alive.
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Narrator Laura Benanti makes this amazing!
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Holiday Country
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Ada adores spending every summer in a Turkish seaside town with her mother and grandmother at the family villa. The glittering waters, endless olive groves, and her spirited friends make it easy to leave her idle life in California behind. But no matter how much Ada feels she belongs to the country where her mother grew up, deep down, her connection to the culture feels as fleeting as the seasons. When Levent, a mysterious man from her mother’s past, shows up in their town, Ada can’t help but imagine a different future for her mother—one that promises a return to home, to love, to happiness.
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Great book.
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The Warmest December
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The Warmest December is the incredibly moving story of one Brooklyn family and the alcoholism that determined years of their lives. Narrated by Kenzie Lowe, a young woman reminiscent of Jamaica Kincaid's Annie John, as she visits her dying father and finds that choices she once thought beyond her control are very much hers to make.
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Bernice McFadden
- By Constance Knight on 07-01-20
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How Trust Works
- The Science of How Relationships Are Built, Broken, and Repaired
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Dr. Peter H. Kim, the world’s leading expert in the rapidly growing field of trust repair, has conducted over two decades of groundbreaking research to answer that question. In How Trust Works, he draws on this research and the work of other social scientists to reveal the surprising truths about how relationships are built, how they are broken, and how they are repaired. Dr. Kim’s work shows how we are often more trusting than we think and how easily our trust in others can be distorted.
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How To Fix Trust That Is Broken
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The Devil’s Daughter
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Most nights PI Jack Coffey can be found hanging out in smoky Greenwich Village jazz clubs with well-known mobsters, jazzmen, and hoods. So, when an uptown financier calls him in for a job, it seems like he’s headed for tonier climes. But it turns out the view from Louis Garrett’s lavish penthouse overlooks the same vice-ridden Manhattan streets, which explains why he’s so desperate to find his missing teenage daughter, Lucy.
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A fun and fascinating read
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What listeners say about My Government Means to Kill Me
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Ervin4Life86
- 02-19-23
Loved it!
I loved that this story didn't end like I expected it to end. I loved that the protagonist is from Indianapolis, IN, which was born and raised. Loved that he moved to NYC to find his own way of life to be himself and discover who he was. Looooved the plot, the characters, themes and time period. There were MANY hot, steamy scenes throughout this novel. The historical aspect of it was a very nice touch, too. This point of view of a well-spoken, educated, young Black, Gay Man during the AIDS epidemic/crisis was very refreshing. Trauma did not define him. Thank you!!! Jelani Alladin was an EXCELLENT narrator for this novel. Perfect choice! His storytelling was engaging, sexy , and fun to listen to. His character choices were believable. Spot ON!!! I hope to hear more of him as a narrator in future audiobooks to come. 😍👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
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- Kris
- 02-08-23
Must Read
Vibrant and entertaining story. I thought it would be too heavy, I was so wrong. The characters in Newson’s story made me feel like I knew them, the lessons in each chapter are very relevant for our times.
This was so good I bought a physical copy.
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- MB
- 03-01-23
Wonderful book
Wonderful book about gay life at the beginning of AIDS epidemic. Great performance. One if those books that stay with you long after you finish the last chapter.
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- Heather & Owen
- 03-03-24
Clear and descriptive narrative
this was a great book made me laugh made me cry and I'm forever changed.
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- tyrone aguillard jr.
- 09-13-22
superb!
wonderful on all counts!!!! It was awesome and well done! The narrative execution was excellent!
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- Amber Holloman
- 06-18-23
Thoroughly enjoyed this book!
The writing was captivating! The author did a great job at developing the characters
and taking the readers directly to New York in the 1980s during the AIDS epidemic. The book kept a good pace and many interesting themes were covered.
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- Harry
- 09-16-22
I enjoyed it in the end
There is so much to love about this book. The narrator was great. The subject matter was important. The history should be heard. The second half was very gripping.
The first half of the book, I felt, was a little all over the place. I think that is because they were trying to fit a lot of history and historical events and references into one person’s story and because of that, it was a little hard to focus on.
I wish the plot had been a little more streamlined but the second half was great.
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- Chawn Real
- 04-07-23
Bruv! This was AMAZINGLY GREAT!! BUT....
...that ending?!! Meh!
Man when I tell u this book was awesomely well written...bih, it was! it reads like a memoir...yet it's fiction...with historical references (that are mostly fictionalized)....wow! it was like a gay black Forrest Gump sans Forrest, Bubba Gump & Jenny!
Fantastic job, Rasheed..from this Native Harlemite!
But that ending tho....I need a season 2 or sumthin!!! the rice musta been boiling over and u were done with this book! *9.135 of 10 stars*
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- GRL
- 04-26-23
By far one of the best books I’ve ever read
This book will forever be up there for me with other transformative reading experiences, such as I know why the caged bird sings, the grapes of wrath, 1984, to kill a mockingbird, and many more. I cried, I laughed, I cried some more. I wanted to hug Trey and tell him everything would be alright. This book is brilliant
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- Alex Burba
- 10-07-23
It’s so good
I’ve cried so much with this one! Made me so emotional from the beginning to end.
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