Silence Suicide: A Memoir of a Sexually Abused Girl Suffering from PTSD, Who Was Plagued with Suicidal Thoughts and Voices for Decades, Received Her Ultimate Miracle!
Victory over Abuse Series, Book 4
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Narrated by:
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Marilyn Elaine Lundberg
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By:
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Marilyn Lundberg
About this listen
Here is Marilyn's most recent book in her Victory over Abuse series. She wants you to know that there absolutely can be healing following any great hardship. She lived and now wants to tell you the details of her excruciating pain followed by her triumphant victory!
True story of child abuse and the haunting voice of suicide and death. At the tender age of 13, a voice said to me, "Why don't you commit suicide?" I looked at the other kids nearby to see if anyone else heard the strange voice but saw no indication that they had. From that morning on, I heard suicide and death's harassing voice almost every day until my late 30s.
Before that morning in the hallway at school, the thought of me ending my life prematurely had never crossed my mind, even though I had a boatload of problems. Included in that long list of maladies was major depression, generalized anxiety, shyness, multiple personalities, anorexia, fear, and so much more.
As a child, teenager, and adult, the first 10 years of my life had been mostly erased. There were no memories of sexual abuse, but my body never forgot and replayed the disgusting events every night in the form of nightmares and night terrors.
Upon awakening every morning, tears stained my face and remembrances of the nighttime dreams played over and over again of people and animals chasing me, trapping me, and devouring me.
My smile was forced in order to fit in, but I knew from an early age that I was set apart and different from all the other kids, but I didn't know why.
My life was a living hell, and I was furious at God for not intervening. After all, I had attended church for the first 18 years of my life. I shouted at God in my head, "Where are you, and why aren't you helping me?"
I always knew that the suicide-and-death voice wanted me to die, but I told myself, "Not yet, I need to keep on fighting, so that I can figure out what's wrong with me!
Marilyn's message to you: Never give up; help is on the way to set you free from whatever is binding you! Listen to my short story today, and you, too, can be healed!
©2020 Marilyn Elaine Lundberg (P)2020 Marilyn Elaine LundbergListeners also enjoyed...
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Story
In this powerful healing journey, Linda Barrick applies the words Jesus spoke during his time of greatest pain to help listeners transform their deepest wounds into their highest purpose. In one second, Linda Barrick's life changed when a drunk driver slammed into her family's van, nearly killing her daughter and leaving Linda, her husband, and their son critically injured. Barrick draws on her remarkable story of loss and hope to lead listeners toward emotional, physical, and spiritual restoration.
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Excellent
- By Adella on 09-25-20
By: Linda Barrick
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A Fierce Love
- One Woman’s Courageous Journey to Save Her Marriage
- By: Shauna Shanks
- Narrated by: Sarah Zimmerman
- Length: 7 hrs and 22 mins
- Unabridged
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Love is easy to give when you are getting it back. Are we still called to God's plan of how to love when we are getting none in return? Shauna Shanks's brave journey through obedience reveals the outcome of when we dare to follow God's ludicrous outline for love as described in 1 Corinthians 13. Wrecked with news of her husband's affair and his request for a divorce, Shauna finds herself urgently faced with a decision. Does she give up and divorce her husband and move on, or does she try to fight for her marriage?
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Wisdom
- By Amber on 04-24-20
By: Shauna Shanks
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The Power of a Praying Parent
- By: Stormie Omartian
- Narrated by: Stormie Omartian
- Length: 5 hrs and 48 mins
- Unabridged
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It's never too late to discover the joy that comes from being a part of God's work in your child's life. You don't have to be a perfect parent. But you do need to be a praying parent. And you can do that.
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Every Christian parent’s MUST read!!!
- By Lilposis on 11-19-20
By: Stormie Omartian
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Untangling Emotions
- By: J. Alasdair Groves, Winston T. Smith
- Narrated by: Lance Smith
- Length: 7 hrs and 9 mins
- Unabridged
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Our emotions are complex. Some of us seem able to ignore our feelings, while others feel controlled by them. But most of us would admit that we don’t always know what to do with how we feel. The Bible teaches us that our emotions are an indispensable part of what makes us human―and play a crucial role in our relationships with God and others. Exploring how God designed emotions for our good, this book shows us how to properly engage with our emotions.
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So good
- By Skyler on 07-21-24
By: J. Alasdair Groves, and others
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You Can Trust God to Write Your Story
- Embracing the Mysteries of Providence
- By: Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth, Robert D. Wolgemuth
- Narrated by: Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth, Robert D. Wolgemuth
- Length: 5 hrs and 20 mins
- Unabridged
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In their first book together, best-selling authors Robert and Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth share biblical and modern-day stories of God’s providence at work, including their own story of finding love and marrying - the first time for Nancy at age 57 and the second time for Robert, a widower. Each story will inspire you as you watch God redeem impossible situations in the unlikeliest ways. Learn to see His hand in your life, and you'll never be the same.
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A Wonderful, Scripturally Founded, Encouragement!
- By Jennifer Harvey on 10-07-19
By: Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth, and others
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Forgiving My Father, Forgiving Myself
- An Invitation to the Miracle of Forgiveness
- By: Ruth Graham, Cindy Lambert - contributor
- Narrated by: Ruth Graham
- Length: 6 hrs and 45 mins
- Unabridged
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When we live with unresolved anger or hurt, the result is nearly always bitterness, broken relationships, and unhealthy behaviors. Unforgiveness not only sabotages our interactions with those around us, it impedes our own spiritual growth and inner peace. And it can happen to anyone. In her most vulnerable writing yet, Ruth Graham reveals how a visit to Angola Prison inspired her to release the unforgiveness lurking in her own heart - toward others, herself, and even her heavenly Father and her earthly father, evangelist Billy Graham.
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Ruth speaks truth from a tested heart
- By chad on 05-20-20
By: Ruth Graham, and others
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God's Grace in Your Suffering
- By: David Powlison
- Narrated by: David Cochran Heath
- Length: 2 hrs and 51 mins
- Unabridged
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There are never quick fixes or easy answers when it comes to suffering. But even when we can’t immediately see God’s hand - when the struggle is hard and painful - he is working. Weaving together Scripture, personal stories, and the words of the classic hymn “How Firm a Foundation”, David Powlison brings an experienced counselor’s touch to exploring how God enters into our sufferings, helping us see God working in our own particular struggles - and discover how God’s grace goes deeper than we could ever imagine.
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Helpful Scripture based encouragement
- By Backyard mechanic on 05-30-21
By: David Powlison
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Power to Heal
- Experiencing the Miraculous
- By: Joan Hunter
- Narrated by: Pamela Almand
- Length: 7 hrs and 51 mins
- Unabridged
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There are many medical options available today for healing the body and mind, but few accomplish true healing - and none bring creative restoration. Many people live in the cycle of dependency and the endless search for relief, even allowing the fear of losing their healing to take hold after a small success. With wisdom, revelation from God, and plenty of scriptural support, Joan Hunter reveals powerful truths about healing and being whole.
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Outstanding!
- By LYoung on 03-22-19
By: Joan Hunter
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You Are More Than You Know
- Face Your Fears, Grow Stronger
- By: Patsy Clairmont
- Narrated by: Patsy Clairmont
- Length: 3 hrs and 29 mins
- Unabridged
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In You Are More Than You Know, Patsy's trademark humor spills out as she answers the question she is most often asked: How did you overcome your own debilitating fears? Along the way she helps listeners face their own anxieties, dismay, worries, and despair. Through honest and intimate glimpses into a heart changed by the power of hope, this audiobook is a guide for the journey to find more of you...and much more of what God has for you.
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Fantastic
- By D. Boetscher on 06-15-18
By: Patsy Clairmont
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Becoming Myself
- Embracing God's Dream of You
- By: Stasi Eldredge
- Narrated by: Stasi Eldredge
- Length: 8 hrs and 18 mins
- Unabridged
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God has dreams - just for you. Becoming Myself is a hope-filled audiobook for anyone who wonders if her life will ever change - if she will ever change. In Stasi Eldredge’s most intimate work yet, she shares her own struggles with self-worth, addiction, and her past as she shows listeners how God is faithfully bringing us to a life of freedom and wholeness. God desires to restore us, and he is able to restore us - the real us. As he heals our inner life he calls us to "rise to the occasion" of our lives.
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Powerful!!
- By Rick on 01-25-14
By: Stasi Eldredge
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Heart Made Whole
- By: Christa Black Gifford
- Narrated by: Christa Black Gifford
- Length: 5 hrs and 46 mins
- Unabridged
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In Heart Made Whole, Christa Black Gifford shares her own stories of loss, betrayal, and personal tragedy, chronicling clear steps to redemption to help those in pain invite the true healer into the tangled mess of their broken hearts. Gifford reminds listeners that pain is not their enemy; however, unhealed pain can become their greatest foe if it's not taken to Jesus.
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Uh-MAZING!!
- By Heather on 06-27-16
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Indestructible
- Fight Your Spiritual Battles from the Winning Side
- By: Blake K. Healy
- Narrated by: Blake Healy
- Length: 4 hrs and 7 mins
- Unabridged
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This book will teach you how to battle your spiritual struggles from the winning side so that you can be victorious both in your life and in the issues happening in today’s world. Many Christians limp through their lives feeling beat up by the enemy, their circumstances, and internal strife. They look at the pattern of world events with a sense of hopelessness. Too often they simply accept these as the natural trials and challenges of life. However, other Christians acknowledge that there is a war happening, a battle between angels and demons.
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A gift of helps
- By Anonymous User on 06-21-21
By: Blake K. Healy
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Running Scared
- Fear, Worry, and the God of Rest
- By: Edward T. Welch
- Narrated by: Claton Butcher
- Length: 9 hrs and 46 mins
- Unabridged
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In Running Scared, Edward T. Welch investigates the roots of fear in the human soul and the ramifications of living in the grips of anxiety, worry, and dread. Welch encourages listeners to discover for themselves that the Bible is full of beautiful words of comfort for fearful people (and that every single person is afraid of something). Within the framework of 30 topical meditations, Welch offers sound biblical theology and moment-by-moment, thoughtful encouragement for life-saving rescue in the midst of the heart and mind battlefield of rampant panic-stricken responses.
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Powerful and Convicting
- By Anna Lewis on 03-17-21
By: Edward T. Welch