Smokepit Fairytales
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Narrated by:
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Tripp Ainsworth
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By:
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Tripp Ainsworth
About this listen
Hank and his trusty Corpsman, "Doc," thought they knew what to expect when they were deployed to Iraq, but after getting trapped in an ancient Babylonian temple, things got weird. Following months of combat in a war that wouldn't end, Hank returns to California to face a different type of immigrant—the kind that comes from space.
Follow Hank through this wildly imaginative science fiction romp as he tries to figure out what it means to be human, or if he even still is one.
©2016 Gene Allen Ainsworth III (P)2023 Gene Allen Ainsworth IIIListeners also enjoyed...
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In sparkling Night City, a ragtag group of strangers have just pulled off a heist, robbing a convoy transporting a mysterious container belonging to Militech. The only thing the group has in common is that they were blackmailed into participating in the heist—and they have no idea just how far their mysterious employer's reach goes, or the purpose of the artifact they stole.
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Before the being called the Emperor revealed himself, before the rise of the aeldari, before the necrontyr traded their flesh for immortal metal, the world was born in violence. Even when they inhabited bodies of flesh, Trazyn the Infinite and Orikan the Diviner were polar opposites. Trazyn, a collector of historical oddities, presides over a gallery full of the most dangerous artefacts - and people - of the galactic past. Orikan, a chronomancer without peer, draws zodiacs that predict and manipulate the future.
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After the arrival of the multiversal monopoly BuyMort, life got brutal. All systems were through BuyMort. All currency was through BuyMort. All sales were through BuyMort. You could resist, you could compete, but it didn’t really matter because in the end you used BuyMort—or you perished. BuyMort be praised. But not everyone’s happy with the new system. Some, even, want to see it destroyed. It’s quick. It’s convenient. And it will help people kill you and your family as readily as it will help them sell you knickknacks for a quick mortie.
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Created to sell toys.
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Huge
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It's 1994, and three stand-up comedians have embarked on a tour of smaller communities across a remote stretch of rural countryside. Dale is a forty-something comic from Chicago who's on the back half of a mediocre career and thinking about quitting the business. Rynn is a twenty-something fast-rising comedy star from Dublin with a big Hollywood break on her horizon. The third performer is a local act, a late addition to the bill who has agreed to open the shows and do all the driving. He goes by the name Hobie Huge, and he is, indeed, enormous.
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Brent Butt tells it from the heart
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Thank You for My Service
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Members of the military’s special operations branches share a closely guarded secret: They love their jobs. They relish the opportunity to fight. They are thankful for it, even, and hopeful that maybe they’ll get to kill a bunch of bad guys while they’re at it. You don’t necessarily need to thank them for their service - the pleasure is all theirs. In this hilarious and personal memoir, listeners ride shotgun alongside former Army Ranger and private military contractor and current social media phenomenon Mat Best, into the action and its aftermath, both abroad and at home.
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If Deadpool was a ranger...with less cancer
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No Quarter
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The rules have changed. Now the Damned can go on vacation and even hook up. Without Pandora near him, can Calvin get a little action in Cabo? Unfortunately, the general has a different demand for Katie, and it’s coming from the whole industry. Requested in New York to work with the NYPD, Katie is working a side job or two. Her mercenary skills are useful, and profitable, for other types of hard jobs. And this time, the Damned can help a child. There will be hell to pay when Katie and Pandora come calling, with no quarter for the demons.
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No Quarter
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As The Sun Rises It Dawns on Him
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The third opus in the illustrious life of St. James St. James Romance Novels for Dudes collection sees him fighting prohibition in the 1920s all the way through his flyboy days in WWII. If you don't have an erection, he'll give you one. I mean, you'll have to pay for this sh*t... but you'll get one. That's a Men's Wearhouse type of guarantee too, homeboy. Did that guy die btw? (#thoughtsandprayers if he did)
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Bonerific
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Corporal Cannon
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- By: Savannah Cannon
- Narrated by: Savannah Cannon
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Not even old enough to drink, Corporal Savannah Cannon is a young enlisted United States Marine deployed to support Operation Enduring Freedom in Afghanistan in 2010. As a tactical data networking specialist, she is sent away from everyone she knows and attached to a Regimental Combat Team where women are not allowed to repair communications. Her experiences over the next few months shed light on the unique and difficult positions women are placed in when supporting combat roles, while offering a raw look at the painful choices women must sometimes make.
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amazing story
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Resurrection of the Damned
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In a world invaded by demons, it's up to Katie and her Killers to restore order while also evading enemies - and friends - who want her in the worst way.
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Totally Spoiled Storyline
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Wanderers
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Shana wakes up one morning to discover her little sister in the grip of a strange malady. She appears to be sleepwalking. She cannot talk and cannot be woken up. And she is heading with inexorable determination to a destination that only she knows. But Shana and her sister are not alone. Soon, they are joined by a flock of sleepwalkers from across America, on the same mysterious journey. And like Shana, there are other "shepherds" who follow the flock to protect their friends and family on the long dark road ahead.
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Recommended, with some issues
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Razorblade Tears
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Ike Randolph has been out of jail for fifteen years, with not so much as a speeding ticket in all that time. But a Black man with cops at the door knows to be afraid. The last thing he expects to hear is that his son Isiah has been murdered, along with Isiah’s white husband, Derek. Ike had never fully accepted his son but is devastated by his loss. Derek’s father Buddy Lee was almost as ashamed of Derek for being gay as Derek was ashamed his father was a criminal. Buddy Lee still has contacts in the underworld, though, and he wants to know who killed his boy.
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AMAZING!!!!
- By shelley on 07-11-21
By: S. A. Cosby
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Nine Line
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- Narrated by: Kelli White
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When Nick Patterson signed up for the Navy reserves, he just wanted some money for medical school. He never imagined he’d someday find himself fighting for life and limb in the sands of Iraq. Frustrated by a military bureaucracy he cannot begin to understand and an increasingly pointless war, he doubts why he is there and what he is doing. When the plucky and idealistic MEDIVAC pilot Samantha Brown crashes into his life, he sees another side to the war.
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Gripping!
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The World Played Chess
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- By: Robert Dugoni
- Narrated by: Robert Dugoni, Todd Haberkorn
- Length: 10 hrs and 3 mins
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
In 1979, Vincent Bianco has just graduated high school. His only desire: collect a little beer money and enjoy his final summer before college. So he lands a job as a laborer on a construction crew. Working alongside two Vietnam vets, one suffering from PTSD, Vincent gets the education of a lifetime. Now forty years later, with his own son leaving for college, the lessons of that summer - Vincent’s last taste of innocence and first taste of real life - dramatically unfold in a novel about breaking away, shaping a life, and seeking one’s own destiny.
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Great on so many levels.
- By Chris on 09-16-21
By: Robert Dugoni
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Sugarman
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"Kill them all." The dying wish of a man who has lost everything he held dear. The words are spoken to Dominic de Leon, a border patrol agent who is no stranger to death. Dom’s life has been ugly. From his father’s belt to the battlefields of Iraq and Afghanistan, he has been a victim and the instrument of violence. Now, he will visit it upon the people who have taken his brother from him.
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RLTW
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It’s 1984, and life has changed beyond recognition. Airstrip One, formerly known as Great Britain, is a place where Big Brother is always watching, and nobody can hide. Except, perhaps, for Winston Smith. Whilst working at the Ministry of Truth, rewriting history, he secretly dreams of freedom. And in a world where love and sex are forbidden, where it’s hard to distinguish between friend and foe, he meets Julia and O’Brien and vows to rebel.
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- Jacob Turner
- 03-06-24
Best book....of all time
What don't I like? What do I not like? The Epic of Hank and Doc.
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- john merchant
- 02-11-24
WOW!
This is spectacular example of what can be the next Sci-fi epic. Spectacular story telling, and having the author narrating adds a special touch.
A great story about love, loss, and camaraderie, with a generous helping of dick and fart jokes.
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- W. Ellington
- 04-26-24
Details that only a veteran would truly understand
Absolutely loved it, though obviously each character actor used a different recording device and it shows, glaringly...lol
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- Corey Costigan
- 01-16-24
Unexpected surprise
I thought this was completely something Different and just happen to stumble upon it. And I'm very glad I did.
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- huedog
- 09-03-23
great book
great book. I was hoping these books would come out on audible. I can't wait for the next one
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- Matt Wolf
- 08-14-24
Memories
I remember having many conversations almost exactly like this. The names may be different, but the personalities are the same as the men I served with.
This feeling of familiarity made me connect with these characters.
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- Zayne
- 12-12-23
More addictive than cigarettes
Was on a deployment with a marine who recommended this series to me. Me being a chairforce dude when he spoke about space marines and clapping alien cheeks I was a bit concerned for whatever halo star trek crossover fever dream I was about to get into given my pogish nature. But literally could not stop listening to this. It’s honestly one of the most just wild rides but somehow relatable things I’ve listened too. Like Generation Kill went bare back with Original series star trek with a sprinkle of ancient Sumerian thrown in there. 11/10 absolutely killer.
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- Nate Labbe
- 08-31-24
Absolutely one of the best military sci-fi stories
Love the characters and the tale. Lots of blood, gore, sex, violence, as a backdrop to a truly wonderful love story. Honestly, it’s crazy and a great performance at all levels.
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- Joe Barrett
- 09-18-23
Fantastic book
I've been a huge fan of the book series and was excited to hear that the audio books were getting recorded. These may not be for everyone, especially the easily offended, but if you've ever spent time downrange you'll laugh through most of it.
A few of the voice actors could use better microphones, but considering it's recorded by Tripp's buddies doing this for fun, it adds to the character.
Plenty of the additional effects (weapons fire, explosions, background music) add to the ambience and make it that much more immersive.
Looking forward to the next one in the series getting the same treatment.
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- Theodore
- 12-03-23
Outstanding!
Holy sh*t. Finally a book written for knuckle dragging grunts like me. Hearing this gave me flashback to times in the smokpit with the boys and a war boner that hasn't gone down since I started it. I cannot reccomend highly enough.
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