The Grass Is Always Greener over the Septic Tank
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Narrated by:
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Barbara Rosenblat
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By:
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Erma Bombeck
About this listen
In The Grass Is Always Greener over the Septic Tank, Bombeck rides the train to the suburbs. In lands like the Suburbian Gems subdivision, settlers from the city brave endless cul-de-sacs and overly helpful insurance salesmen. Picture windows bring new meaning to the term "neighborly". A poorly timed trip to the restroom results in a promotion to Girl Scout Cookie Captain. And brave parents fight epic battles to get sex out of the schools and back into the gutters.
With Barbara Rosenblat's perfect comic timing, the author of If Life Is a Bowl of Cherries - What Am I Doing in the Pits? and A Marriage Made in Heaven, or Too Tired for an Affair adds to her reputation as America's favorite funny lady.
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Will Johnnie Veal—convicted of the murder of two police officers in 1970—be granted parole after 50 years in prison? How can he convince the parole board he’s reformed when he insists he’s innocent? What is prison time even supposed to accomplish? These are the questions that propel The Parole Room forward as it builds toward Johnnie’s 20th parole hearing—after 19 rejections.
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Enlightening story & a must read
- By Patsy on 10-07-24
By: Ben Austen
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Problem Child
- By: Terrell Carter, Stacy Thunes
- Narrated by: Terrell Carter
- Length: 7 hrs and 34 mins
- Unabridged
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Problem Child is the unbelievably true story of Terrell Carter, an American musician and actor who grew up in Buffalo, New York, in a dysfunctional family, each member crazier than the next. And the Problem Child is the only one in the story who may, or may not, actually have a problem. An emotional journey of trials and revelations, with a huge secret at its core, this story may force you to laugh - just to keep from crying.
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Worth the wait . . .
- By JPALJ on 12-07-22
By: Terrell Carter, and others
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Elvis and Me
- By: Priscilla Beaulieu Presley
- Narrated by: Priscilla Beaulieu Presley
- Length: 7 hrs and 30 mins
- Unabridged
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The inspiration for the major motion picture Priscilla directed by Sofia Coppola, this New York Times best seller reveals the intimate story of Elvis Presley and Priscilla Presley, told by the woman who lived it.
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What a story!
- By Pen Name on 08-28-22
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Genghis Khan and the Making of the Modern World
- By: Jack Weatherford
- Narrated by: Jonathan Davis, Jack Weatherford
- Length: 14 hrs and 20 mins
- Unabridged
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The Mongol army led by Genghis Khan subjugated more lands and people in 25 years than the Romans did in 400. In nearly every country the Mongols conquered, they brought an unprecedented rise in cultural communication, expanded trade, and a blossoming of civilization.
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Golden Horde/Platinum Listen
- By Cynthia on 12-11-13
By: Jack Weatherford
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The Wonder of Stevie
- By: Wesley Morris
- Narrated by: Wesley Morris, Michelle Obama, Barack Obama, and others
- Length: 6 hrs and 10 mins
- Original Recording
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The year 1972 saw the beginning of a five-year span in which Stevie Wonder released five groundbreaking, critically acclaimed albums, garnering him more than half a dozen Grammys and more than 10 million albums sold, securing his place as one of the most important American musicians and songwriters in history. For the first time, uncover the untold story of an extraordinary artistic journey that shaped the greatest creative era in popular music history.
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Good but not great
- By Anonymous User on 09-14-24
By: Wesley Morris
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The Last Days of Cabrini-Green
- By: Ben Austen, Harrison David Rivers
- Narrated by: Ben Austen, Patina Miller, Harry Lennix, and others
- Length: 3 hrs and 32 mins
- Original Recording
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In 1992, the deadliest year in Chicago’s history, seven-year-old Dantrell Davis was shot and killed in front of his elementary school inside the public housing complex Cabrini-Green. What happened to Dantrell led to a truce among Chicago’s gangs, but it also ignited a national panic about poverty and violence in America’s cities. Dantrell’s name would soon be used to demolish all of Chicago’s high-rise public housing, displacing tens of thousands of low-income families.
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A Gripping and Necessary Work
- By booklover on 11-24-24
By: Ben Austen, and others
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San Miguel Kidnappings
- By: Erick Galindo, Roger Vela
- Narrated by: Karla Souza
- Length: 4 hrs and 50 mins
- Original Recording
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The close knit community in San Miguel de Allende Mexico was plagued by a string of sophisticated kidnappings for nearly a decade. When the police finally made an arrest the townspeople were shocked by who was accused of masterminding the criminal enterprise. It's everyone's favorite neighbor and a pillar of the community, Ramon Guerra. Except Ramon isn't who he says he is.
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Insightful
- By Tara on 12-11-24
By: Erick Galindo, and others
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The Book of Murder
- A Prosecutor's Journey Through Love and Death
- By: Matt Murphy
- Narrated by: Matt Murphy
- Length: 9 hrs and 59 mins
- Unabridged
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Examining murder from an insider’s perspective, Matt Murphy—a former senior deputy district attorney and current ABC News legal analyst—discusses cases from his career, how they strained his personal life, and how he found peace seeking justice for victims and their families. Part taxonomy of murder, part prosecutor’s handbook, and part personal memoir, The Book of Murder goes through a dozen cases and his recollections of his 26 years in the Orange County DA’s office (17 in the Homicide Unit).
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Fascinating true crime
- By RueRue on 12-19-24
By: Matt Murphy
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The Meaning of Mariah Carey
- By: Mariah Carey
- Narrated by: Mariah Carey
- Length: 11 hrs and 17 mins
- Unabridged
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It took me a lifetime to have the courage and the clarity to write my memoir. I want to tell the story of the moments - the ups and downs, the triumphs and traumas, the debacles and the dreams - that contributed to the person I am today. This book is composed of my memories, my mishaps, my struggles, my survival, and my songs. Unfiltered. I went deep into my childhood and gave the scared little girl inside of me a big voice. I let the abandoned and ambitious adolescent have her say, and the betrayed and triumphant woman I became tell her side.
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Entertaining glitz glam smoke and mirrors - not the whole story.
- By Anonymous User on 10-04-20
By: Mariah Carey
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Episodes
- The True Story of Two Friends & One Diagnosis
- By: Mara Altman, Kat Alexander
- Narrated by: Mara Altman, Kat Alexander
- Length: 7 hrs and 5 mins
- Original Recording
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In Episodes, lifelong best friends Kat and Mara take listeners on an unfiltered journey through friendship, mental illness, and survival. Kat, a successful professional, is preparing for marriage and motherhood. On her fourth round of IVF, it happened—a frantic call to Mara. Mara comes over to find Kat, her friend of 25 years—the one who'd always been levelheaded, hilarious, and over-the-top thoughtful—trying to jump through a window.
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Just listen!
- By AJ on 11-17-24
By: Mara Altman, and others
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The Autobiography of Malcolm X
- As Told to Alex Haley
- By: Malcolm X, Alex Haley
- Narrated by: Laurence Fishburne
- Length: 16 hrs and 52 mins
- Unabridged
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Experience a bold take on this classic autobiography as it’s performed by Oscar-nominated Laurence Fishburne. In this searing classic autobiography, originally published in 1965, Malcolm X, the Muslim leader, firebrand, and Black empowerment activist, tells the extraordinary story of his life and the growth of the Human Rights movement. His fascinating perspective on the lies and limitations of the American dream and the inherent racism in a society that denies its non-White citizens the opportunity to dream, gives extraordinary insight into the most urgent issues of our own time.
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it's Nearly perfect
- By Kerry on 09-16-20
By: Malcolm X, and others
What listeners say about The Grass Is Always Greener over the Septic Tank
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Tracy
- 02-24-13
I LOVE THIS!
If you could sum up The Grass Is Always Greener over the Septic Tank in three words, what would they be?
real life situations made hilarous!!
What was one of the most memorable moments of The Grass Is Always Greener over the Septic Tank?
OMG ... there are too many!! Erma Bombeck is the best!!
What about Barbara Rosenblat’s performance did you like?
she was very energetic and read with gusto
Did you have an extreme reaction to this book? Did it make you laugh or cry?
oh goodness yes it made me laugh out loud!!
Any additional comments?
I read " THE GRASS IS ALWAYS GREENER OVER SEPTIC TANK" years ago. It was just as funny if not more so to listen to the audio book!!
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4 people found this helpful
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- Corbin5
- 01-19-17
Voice is so bad
If you're old enough to remember Erma, you will be SO disappointed in this reading! Ruined it for me. Didn't get past the first chapter.
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2 people found this helpful
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- Researcher
- 01-29-23
very entertaining
laugh out loud funny, even 2nd and 3rd time listening! helps put parenthood into perspective. very good narration.
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- SherBear52
- 07-19-24
funny things that are relatable
Foud this book very funny. it's life but told to make ya laugh 😃
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- ssharon Miller
- 02-20-18
wonderful book fantastic as all
wonderful book I think I've read all her books now, wish she had written more but that's the way things go
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- Robert N. Fife Sr.
- 05-30-23
LZFIFE
One of the GOAT’s and will keep me giggling for hours! I can’t wait to go to her next book!
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- Mary Joyce phillips
- 10-30-18
Loved it ...
Very entertaining. The narrator is fabulous. Irma Bombeck was awesome. Would recommend this audible to anyone.
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- Karen J
- 02-20-23
Read the book!
The narrator for this classic Bombeck book is ALL wrong. Bombeck had a dry wit. I wish she had read it herself!
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- Toma
- 03-13-23
Loved all of it!
Bombeck’s humor speaks for itself but in this case the narration, in my opinion was brilliant! Not sure why some didn’t enjoy the reading.
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- Teresa
- 10-20-12
Family humor
What made the experience of listening to The Grass Is Always Greener over the Septic Tank the most enjoyable?
I read this book years ago. I really enjoyed listening to it. It is funny to hear about the technology changes in our life's over the years.
Would you be willing to try another book from Erma Bombeck? Why or why not?
I already purchased all of her audiobooks.
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2 people found this helpful