
The Journal of Best Practices
A Memoir of Marriage, Asperger Syndrome, and One Man's Quest to Be a Better Husband
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Narrated by:
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David Finch
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By:
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David Finch
About this listen
At some point in nearly every marriage, a wife finds herself asking, "What is wrong with my husband?!" In David Finch's case, this turns out to be an apt question. Five years after he married Kristen, the love of his life, they learn that he has Asperger syndrome. The diagnosis explains David's ever-growing list of quirks and compulsions, his lifelong propensity to quack and otherwise melt down in social exchanges, and his clinical strength inflexibility. But it doesn't make him any easier to live with.
Determined to change, David sets out to understand Asperger syndrome and learn to be a better husband - no easy task for a guy whose inability to express himself rivals his two-year-old daughter's, who thinks his responsibility for laundry extends no further than throwing things in (or at) the hamper, and whose autism spectrum condition makes seeing his wife's point of view a near impossibility.
Nevertheless, David devotes himself to improving his marriage with an endearing, yet hilarious, zeal that involves excessive note-taking, performance reviews, and most of all, The Journal of Best Practices: a collection of hundreds of maxims and hard-won epiphanies that result from self-reflection, both comic and painful. They include "Don't change the radio station when she's singing along", "Apologies do not count when you shout them", and "Be her friend, first and always". Guided by The Journal of Best Practices, David transforms himself over the course of two years from the world's most trying husband to the husband who tries the hardest - the husband he'd always meant to be.
Filled with humor and surprising wisdom, The Journal of Best Practices is a candid story of ruthless self-improvement, a unique window into living with an autism spectrum condition, and proof that a true heart can conquer all.
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Story
Do you feel like you're losing your mind? Do you feel overwhelmed, misunderstood and invisible? Do you feel disconnected emotionally and more like a roommate, instead of a wife? Maybe you feel more like his mother, instead of a loving partner. You're missing heartfelt intimacy. It wasn't like this when you were dating. You love him, but you are at the end of your rope. You can't really share his odd behavior with anyone, because they wouldn't understand you. You've tried everything to make your marriage work. You've tried to get him to watch marriage videos.
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No real info…
- By semifamousartist on 11-10-24
By: Olivia Hall
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22 Things a Woman Must Know If She Loves a Man with Asperger's Syndrome
- By: Maxine Aston, Rudy Simone
- Narrated by: Lucie McNeil
- Length: 1 hr and 43 mins
- Unabridged
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Although having Asperger syndrome (AS) can make romantic relations difficult, having a fulfilling relationship with an Asperger man is certainly not impossible. A woman in love with a man with AS may interpret his difficulties with communication and socialisation as a lack of interest in the relationship. He may vacillate between being gentle and caring to seeming cold and distant. She may find his behaviour hard to understand, resulting in feelings of loneliness, isolation and confusion.
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A Game Changer for Someone In a Relationship with a Man Who Has Aspergers
- By J on 04-25-21
By: Maxine Aston, and others
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"Asperger Syndrome" & Relationships
- Everything You Need to Survive a NeuroDivergent Life
- By: Dr. Kathy J Marshack
- Narrated by: Virtual Voice
- Length: 1 hr and 34 mins
- Unabridged
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______________________________________________ RECOMMENDATIONS AND PRAISE FROM READERS ______________________________________________“Kathy, you have opened doors that help me to be more gracious and accepting toward my husband’s struggles without becoming an ‘object.’” “Amen. Thank, you Dr. Kathy. [From] Xoxox [who is] feeling encouraged for the first time in days.” “Wow!! This was awesome, so well explained!! I found myself remembering how it feels with similar ‘missed’ understandings by my [Autistic] partner. It feels like he misses 99.9 percent of me, just can’t ...
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If you’re looking for reasons to support your victim mentality…
- By Brian K Akins on 03-21-25
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Dad Is Fat
- By: Jim Gaffigan
- Narrated by: Jim Gaffigan
- Length: 5 hrs and 26 mins
- Unabridged
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In Dad is Fat, stand-up comedian Jim Gaffigan, who’s best known for his legendary riffs on Hot Pockets, bacon, manatees, and McDonald's, expresses all the joys and horrors of life with five young children - everything from cousins ("celebrities for little kids") to toddlers’ communication skills ("they always sound like they have traveled by horseback for hours to deliver important news"), to the eating habits of four-year-olds ("there is no difference between a four-year-old eating a taco and throwing a taco on the floor").
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Good for Gaffigan fans - better for expecting dads
- By Sean on 05-17-13
By: Jim Gaffigan
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Adult Autism Essentials
- A Step-by-Step Approach to Navigating Relationships, Professional Life and Finding Resources While Celebrating Our Strengths
- By: Jason Jones
- Narrated by: Phillip Daugherty Sr
- Length: 3 hrs and 43 mins
- Unabridged
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Are you or a loved one feeling overwhelmed by an adult autism diagnosis? Do you struggle with daily challenges and want to leverage the unique strengths autism brings? Look no further. "Adult Autism Essentials" offers practical advice and insights to improve daily life, build stronger relationships, and access necessary resources.
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Very Helpful
- By Dan on 01-12-25
By: Jason Jones
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NeuroTribes
- The Legacy of Autism and the Future of Neurodiversity
- By: Steve Silberman
- Narrated by: William Hughes
- Length: 18 hrs and 46 mins
- Unabridged
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What is autism: a lifelong disability or a naturally occurring form of cognitive difference akin to certain forms of genius? In truth, it is both of these things and more - and the future of our society depends on our understanding it. Wired reporter Steve Silberman unearths the secret history of autism, long suppressed by the same clinicians who became famous for discovering it, and finds surprising answers to the crucial question of why the number of diagnoses has soared in recent years.
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The long hard road to proper identity on the Autistic spectrum.
- By Lorijorn on 10-29-15
By: Steve Silberman
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Sincerely, Your Autistic Child
- What People on the Autism Spectrum Wish Their Parents Knew About Growing Up, Acceptance, and Identity
- By: Emily Paige Ballou, Sharon daVanport, Morénike Giwa Onaiwu
- Narrated by: Stephanie Mounce
- Length: 6 hrs and 10 mins
- Unabridged
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A diverse collection of autistic voices that highlights how parents can avoid common mistakes and misconceptions, and make their child feel truly accepted, valued, and celebrated for who they are. Most resources available for parents come from psychologists, educators, and doctors, offering parents a narrow and technical approach to autism. Sincerely, Your Autistic Child represents an authentic resource for parents written by autistic people themselves.
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Excludes cis-gendered boys
- By Alyssa Snider on 11-30-22
By: Emily Paige Ballou, and others
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Life with a Partner or Spouse with Asperger Syndrome (ASD)
- Going over the Edge? Practical Steps to Saving You and Your Relationship
- By: Kathy Marshack
- Narrated by: Virtual Voice
- Length: 6 hrs and 32 mins
- Unabridged
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Amazon Description for Anniversary Edition of “Going Over the Edge?” “‘Going Over the Edge?’ is bold, brave, and beautiful. I love how you define “Aspie” dynamics and create a language around stuff that is almost indescribable. I cried a bunch of times. It means so much that someone really understands what this life is like and can describe how the solution is more than the NeuroTypical (NT) being accommodating and understanding. I love hearing about the author’s personal experience and knowing that she gets it! I want my therapist to read this book.” “Dr. Marshack gives...
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Awesome book! Ai narration not so much.
- By Maggiemae on 09-12-24
By: Kathy Marshack
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The Reason I Jump
- The Inner Voice of a Thirteen-Year-Old Boy with Autism
- By: Naoki Higashida
- Narrated by: Tom Picasso
- Length: 2 hrs and 27 mins
- Unabridged
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Written by Naoki Higashida, a very smart, very self-aware, and very charming thirteen-year-old boy with autism, The Reason I Jumpis a one-of-a-kind memoir that demonstrates how an autistic mind thinks, feels, perceives, and responds in ways few of us can imagine. Parents and family members who never thought they could get inside the head of their autistic loved one at last have a way to break through to the curious, subtle, and complex life within.
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Insightful but left me skeptical
- By JoAnn on 06-25-14
By: Naoki Higashida
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Women and Girls on the Autism Spectrum (Second Edition)
- Understanding Life Experiences from Early Childhood to Old Age
- By: Sarah Hendrickx, Judith Gould - foreword, Jess Hendrickx
- Narrated by: Lucie McNeil
- Length: 12 hrs and 17 mins
- Unabridged
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The difference that being female makes to the diagnosis, life and experiences of an autistic person is hugely significant. In this second edition, Sarah Hendrickx combines the latest research with personal stories from girls and women on the autism spectrum to present a picture of their feelings, thoughts and experiences at each stage of their lives. Outlining the likely impact will be for autistic women and girls throughout their lifespan, Hendrickx surveys everything from diagnosis, childhood, education, adolescence, friendships and sexuality, to employment, pregnancy, parenting, and aging.
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illuminating
- By Ana Belén Rivero on 05-05-25
By: Sarah Hendrickx, and others
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Unmasking Autism
- Discovering the New Faces of Neurodiversity
- By: Devon Price PhD
- Narrated by: Devon Price PhD
- Length: 9 hrs and 51 mins
- Unabridged
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In Unmasking Autism, Dr. Devon Price shares their personal experience with masking and blends history, social science research, prescriptions, and personal profiles to tell a story of neurodivergence that has thus far been dominated by those on the outside looking in. For Dr. Price and many others, Autism is a deep source of uniqueness and beauty. Unfortunately, living in a neurotypical world means it can also be a source of incredible alienation and pain.
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Disappointing
- By Debra M. Givin on 11-12-22
By: Devon Price PhD
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Tiny Humans, Big Emotions
- How to Navigate Tantrums, Meltdowns, and Defiance to Raise Emotionally Intelligent Children
- By: Alyssa Blask Campbell, Lauren Elizabeth Stauble
- Narrated by: Alyssa Blask Campbell
- Length: 10 hrs and 13 mins
- Unabridged
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We’re in the midst of a parenting revolution that is radically changing the way we raise our kids. Gone are the days of minimizing emotions: Don’t Cry. You’re Fine. Don’t Make a Scene. As our understanding of developing brains has increased, today’s parents are looking for a new way to help their children understand their feelings and learn to process them.
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Good pointers for preschool parents and teachers
- By Chelsea on 06-17-24
By: Alyssa Blask Campbell, and others
What listeners say about The Journal of Best Practices
Highly rated for:
Reviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- smt4242
- 05-28-15
Entitled asshole seeks redemption
This book. This guy... Holy cow. His wife is a saint. His new obsession became his wife and family and he tried to become what they needed him to be through obsession. It worked. But don't expect to sympathize much with his character.
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4 people found this helpful
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- Anonymous User
- 01-06-19
Best book ive found so far
Great sense of humor, it was hard finding a book that was informative yet entertaining and this one nailed it! However I was expecting some tips on coping with the illness which left me a bit disappointed but other then that 10/10. Loved it! <3
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- Matthew Mastakowski
- 05-22-15
Really explains a lot
Would you listen to The Journal of Best Practices again? Why?
There is so much here that opened my eyes to my life and how I have been living since I was a kid.
Who was your favorite character and why?
David Finch because I could relate to him and I don't like things that are outside of my comfort-zone
Have you listened to any of David Finch’s other performances before? How does this one compare?
I have not.
Was there a moment in the book that particularly moved you?
The first realization with the test for Aspergers.
Any additional comments?
It was the best of Aspergers. It was the worst of Aspergers. While David can be verbose with his flowery descriptions, it is the exact thing I would do. That makes me not feel so alone or odd.
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4 people found this helpful
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- Tmd
- 07-07-15
Good
Loved it! Great insight into relationships and how to make them work. I have already recommended the book to several others. The narration was good.
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1 person found this helpful
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- Jennifer
- 01-01-16
Relationship saving, life changing, good hearted
Advice for aspies who seek to ease the lives of their loved ones. Also insightful to relatives who aspire to shed light on previously incomprehensible behavior.
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1 person found this helpful
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- Lisa Murphy
- 06-13-24
Very interesting story and helpful to understand Asperger‘s
I enjoyed listening to the story and the effort that this couple made to keep their marriage intact and live a happy life. Very informative on the impact of Asperger’s.
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- Martha Vergunst
- 10-24-24
Brilliant! Entertaining! Inspirational!
This book not only gives the reader a glimpse into the mind and characteristics of a married man, it proves what positive changes can occur in a marital relationship when intentionality is exhibited by a husband.
David shares his honest struggles to understand the environment he created, but goes to impressive lengths to implement strategies that improve the relationship with his wife and children.
Whether a man is on the autism spectrum, or not, this book can be instrumental in helping him grasp the simple concepts that plague most marriages and how a man can turn his life and marriage around with sheer determination and effort.
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- angelee wagner
- 09-12-21
The most helpful book I’ve ever read
I found this book many years ago when my husband realized he has Asperger‘s. This was an enlightening book for me to and help me understand inside the mind of my husband. It has taken me years and years to get my husband to finally read/listen to this book.He said he couldn’t believe he was laughing his head off one minute and crying his eyes out the next. If someone you love has Asperger’s read this book! I bought copies for everyone in our family.
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1 person found this helpful
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- StaceyLinnette
- 09-03-17
Thank You for the Understanding
wow.. truely amazing thought provoking i laughed giggle and found helpfull insight in my time enjoying this book. Thanks for sharing this journey on a destination in life.
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- Pavel
- 04-22-19
Saw a few glimpses of myself
Enjoyable listen, I could relate to a few situations and it gave me hope and faith in myself
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