The Mueller Report
The Leaked Investigation into President Donald Trump and His Inner Circle of Con Men, Circus Clowns, and Children He Named After Himself
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Narrated by:
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Michael Ian Black
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James Adomian
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Laura Benanti
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By:
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Jason O. Gilbert
About this listen
The most anticipated literary event of our time: the publication of The Mueller Report, the full, uproarious, and Totally Fake findings of Robert Mueller’s investigation into the election of President Donald J. Trump, leaked to the Very Biased and Highly Unemployed comedy writer Jason O. Gilbert by an anonymous, Deep Throat-esque source known only as “Melania T”.
The Mueller Report is 2018’s most anticipated release that doesn’t involve Chris Pratt punching a dinosaur, and for good reason: The entire country is waiting to see what former FBI director and current special counsel Robert Mueller has dug up on former mail-order steak salesman and current US president Donald J. Trump. That wait is over - sort of - with the publication of The Mueller Report by Jason O. Gilbert.
Leaked to Gilbert by an anonymous White House source who goes only by the mysterious code name “Melania T.”, The Mueller Report is a hilarious inventory of the dirt, grime, and Big Mac crumbs that the special counsel has collected on President Trump during his months of investigation. Filled with interview transcripts, intercepted phone calls, incriminating emails, text exchanges, ALL-CAPS TRUMP TWEETS WITH SPELING ERRORS, and more, it whisks listeners from the leaky White House to an even leakier Ritz-Carlton hotel room in Moscow, from Donald Trump Jr.’s covert meeting with Russians in Trump Tower to Michael Cohen’s secret sale of a Trump Tower apartment to a shell corporation called Oligarch LLC.
And, for the first time, you’ll find out what really happened in that Moscow Ritz-Carlton hotel room between Donald Trump and two well-hydrated Russian escorts. NOT GOOD!
Unlike the Trump presidency, The Mueller Report is so much fun you won’t want it to end. Order your copy now, while books are still legal in America!
©2018 Jason O. Gilbert (P)2018 Simon & SchusterListeners also enjoyed...
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Occasionally time dampers our memory - this reminds us
- By Linda S. on 10-19-15
By: Edward Klein
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The Last of the President's Men
- By: Bob Woodward
- Narrated by: Campbell Scott
- Length: 6 hrs and 9 mins
- Unabridged
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Bob Woodward exposes one of the final pieces of the Richard Nixon puzzle in his new book, The Last of the President's Men. Woodward reveals the untold story of Alexander Butterfield, the Nixon aide who disclosed the secret White House taping system that changed history and led to Nixon's resignation.
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A Disturbing portrayal of Nixon
- By Jean on 11-17-15
By: Bob Woodward
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The Great Gasbag
- An A-Z Study Guide to Surviving Trump World
- By: Joy Behar
- Narrated by: Joy Behar
- Length: 5 hrs and 10 mins
- Unabridged
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Put down the knife, lock away the gun, lay aside the noose - Joy Behar is here to save you from suicide as she hot walks you through the next four years (two if we are lucky, less if liberal dreams come true). Besides despair, the sane response to the insanity in the White House is laughter. On her hit ABC daytime show The View, Joy has been blunt in her condemnation of the comb over-in-chief, and her words have electrified and inspired millions in the resistance for whom #notmypresident has become a rallying cry.
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Funny and Smart !
- By MM on 10-29-17
By: Joy Behar
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Trump and Me
- By: Mark Singer
- Narrated by: Mark Singer, David Remnick
- Length: 2 hrs and 18 mins
- Unabridged
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Ever since Donald Trump entered the presidential race - in a press conference attended by paid actors, in which he slandered Mexican immigrants - he has dominated headlines, becoming the unrestrained id at the center of one of the most bizarre and alarming elections in American history. It was not always so. In 1996, longtime New Yorker writer Mark Singer was conscripted by his editor to profile Donald Trump. At that time Trump was a mere Manhattan-centric megalomaniac, a failing casino operator mired in his second divorce.
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Interesting listen about a shallow life.
- By rob on 08-09-17
By: Mark Singer
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Giuliani
- The Rise and Tragic Fall of America's Mayor
- By: Andrew Kirtzman
- Narrated by: Gibson Frazier
- Length: 15 hrs and 19 mins
- Unabridged
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Rudy Giuliani was hailed after 9/11 as “America’s Mayor,” a national hero who, at the time, was more widely admired than the pope. He was brilliant, accomplished—and complicated. He conflated politics with morality, made reckless personal choices, and engaged in self-destructive behavior. A series of disastrous decisions and cynical compromises, coupled with his need for power, money, and attention gradually ruined his reputation, cost him political support, and ultimately damaged the country.
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You Clearly See His Story
- By Anonymous User on 10-06-23
By: Andrew Kirtzman
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Bad City
- Peril and Power in the City of Angels
- By: Paul Pringle
- Narrated by: Robert Petkoff
- Length: 9 hrs and 48 mins
- Unabridged
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On a cool, overcast afternoon in April 2016, a salacious tip arrived at the L.A. Times that reporter Paul Pringle thought should have taken, at most, a few weeks to check out: a drug overdose at a fancy hotel involving one of the University of Southern California’s shiniest stars—Dr. Carmen Puliafito, the head of the prestigious medical school. Pringle, who’d long done battle with USC and its almost impenetrable culture of silence, knew reporting the story wouldn’t be a walk in the park. USC is the largest private employer in the city of L.A., and it casts a long shadow.
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Wow.
- By Anna on 07-22-22
By: Paul Pringle
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Collusion
- Secret Meetings, Dirty Money, and How Russia Helped Donald Trump Win
- By: Luke Harding
- Narrated by: Ralph Lister
- Length: 11 hrs and 24 mins
- Unabridged
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Russia expert Luke Harding lays out the most in-depth look to date at the Trump campaign's dealings with Russia. Beginning with a meeting with Christopher Steele, the man behind the shattering dossier that first brought the allegations to light, Harding probes the histories of key Russian and American players with striking clarity and insight. Harding exposes the disquieting details of the Trump-Russia story - a saga so huge it involves international espionage, offshore banks, sketchy real estate deals, mobsters, money laundering, disappeared dissidents, and more.
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Good summation, but gaps, patched with spin
- By Philo on 11-24-17
By: Luke Harding
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Exposure
- Inside the Olympus Scandal: How I Went from CEO to Whistleblower
- By: Michael Woodford
- Narrated by: Michael Woodford
- Length: 8 hrs and 5 mins
- Unabridged
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When Michael Woodford was made president of Olympus - the company to which he had dedicated thirty years of his career - he became the first Westerner ever to climb the ranks of one of Japan’s corporate giants. Some wondered at the appointment - how could a gaijin who didn’t even speak Japanese understand how to run a Japanese company? But within months Woodford had gained the confidence of most of his colleagues and shareholders.
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Starts off great, then gets stupid
- By Happy Mountain on 10-21-21
By: Michael Woodford
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In the President's Secret Service
- Behind the Scenes with Agents in the Line of Fire and the Presidents They Protect
- By: Ronald Kessler
- Narrated by: Alan Sklar
- Length: 8 hrs and 50 mins
- Unabridged
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Secret Service agents, acting as human surveillance cameras, observe everything that goes on behind the scenes in the president's inner circle. Ronald Kessler reveals what they have seen, providing startling, previously untold stories about the presidents, from John F. Kennedy and Lyndon Johnson to George W. Bush and Barack Obama, as well as about their families, Cabinet officers, and White House aides.
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President's are just human.
- By 9S on 04-26-12
By: Ronald Kessler
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Unhinged
- An Insider's Account of the Trump White House
- By: Omarosa Manigault Newman
- Narrated by: Omarosa Manigault Newman
- Length: 11 hrs and 6 mins
- Unabridged
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Few have been a member of Donald Trump’s inner orbit longer than Omarosa Manigault Newman. Their relationship has spanned 15 years - through four television shows, a presidential campaign, and a year by his side in the most chaotic, outrageous White House in history. But that relationship has come to a decisive and definitive end, and Omarosa is finally ready to share her side of the story in this explosive, jaw-dropping account.
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Take if for what it's worth...
- By Clay on 08-14-18
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Backstabbing for Beginners
- My Crash Course in International Diplomacy
- By: Michael Soussan
- Narrated by: Maxwell Hamilton
- Length: 14 hrs and 25 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Soon to be a major motion picture starring Ben Kingsley and Theo James, the gripping true story of a young program coordinator at the United Nations who stumbles upon a conspiracy involving Iraq's oil reserves. "What made this episode in our collective history possible was not so much the lies we told one another, but the lies we told ourselves". Breaking a conspiracy of silence that had prevailed for years, Soussan sparked an unprecedented corruption probe into the Oil-for-Food program.
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Eye-opener history made entertaining
- By Shelly Dee on 12-20-16
By: Michael Soussan
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What listeners say about The Mueller Report
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- S. Neumann
- 09-07-18
Entertaining
Top-notch entertainers reading clever political satire - what's not to like? The writing is impressive -it's full of references to pop and political culture. It reminds me of how Tina Fey writes where every line is either joke or a lead-in to a joke. Highly recommend this entertaining and very funny book!
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- James Maxwell
- 04-21-19
This is not the report
I was trying to download the Washington post actual mueller report. And instead I got this crap. Why does audible make it such a pain in the ass to get a new title?
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12 people found this helpful
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- audible
- 05-07-19
I expected more wit
This was kind of childish. I listened to it for a while, but then it got soooooo boring, I quit
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10 people found this helpful
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- WizZzrd
- 07-31-19
Fake readers of the contents!
This could have been better done by NOT using odd voices to read characters' testimony. Makes the WHOLE THING sound phoney and greatly distracts from the report itself. Overall, a big disappointment in delivery. Don't waste your time/money on this.
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- Julianne M.
- 04-18-19
D'illusion ! The American left is pathetic !
Struggled to finish the rantings of the this book. It seems that those who supported Hillary will never accept she lost. Image how much more successful President Trump could be if they were not constantly tripping over themselves to try and make him fail. And yet, he continues to make the country a better place. Such simpletons !
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8 people found this helpful