There Are No Grown-Ups
A Midlife Coming-of-Age Story
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Narrated by:
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Pamela Druckerman
About this listen
The best-selling author of Bringing Up Bébé investigates life in her 40s, and wonders whether her mind will ever catch up with her face.
When Pamela Druckerman turns 40, waiters start calling her "Madame", and she detects a disturbing new message in mens' gazes: I would sleep with her, but only if doing so required no effort whatsoever.
Yet 40 isn't even technically middle-aged anymore. And after a lifetime of being clueless, Druckerman can finally grasp the subtext of conversations, maintain (somewhat) healthy relationships and spot narcissists before they ruin her life. What are the modern 40s, and what do we know once we reach them? What makes someone a "grown-up" anyway? And why didn't anyone warn us that we'd get cellulite on our arms? Part frank memoir, part hilarious investigation of daily life, There Are No Grown-Ups diagnoses the in-between decade when...
- Everyone you meet looks a little bit familiar.
- You're matter-of-fact about chin hair.
- You can no longer wear anything ironically.
- There's at least one sport your doctor forbids you to play.
- You become impatient while scrolling down to your year of birth.
- Your parents have stopped trying to change you.
- You don't want to be with the cool people anymore; you want to be with your people.
- You realize that everyone is winging it, some just do it more confidently.
- You know that it's OK if you don't like jazz.
Internationally best-selling author and New York Times contributor Pamela Druckerman leads us on a quest for wisdom, self-knowledge, and the right pair of pants. A witty dispatch from the front lines of the 40s, There Are No Grown-ups is a (midlife) coming-of-age story, and an audiobook for anyone trying to find their place in the world.
©2018 Pamela Druckerman (P)2018 Penguin AudioListeners also enjoyed...
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Critic reviews
“There has been remarkably little good writing about this thorny topic but here, with excellent timing, comes Pamela Druckerman’s pitch-perfect and brutally frank There Are No Grown-Ups. . . . She has a reckless candor that can make you laugh and gasp at the same time. . . . As Nora Ephron said, 'Everything is copy.' For those of us who regard I Feel Bad About My Neck as a bible for the midlife woman, Ephron is simply irreplaceable, but Druckerman is the heir to her impish, unembarrassable spirit and adorable storytelling.” (The New York Times Book Review)
“Essayist Druckerman is both droll and wise on facing the inevitability (and occasional upsides!) of aging.” (People)
“The decline of being middle-aged is probed with humor (chapter 7: How to Plan a Ménage à Trois), honesty (chapter 10: How to Have a Midlife Crisis) and heart (chapter 8: How to be Mortal).” (Family Circle Magazine)
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The Wrong End of the Table
- A Mostly Comic Memoir of a Muslim Arab American Woman Just Trying to Fit In
- By: Ayser Salman, Reza Aslan - foreword
- Narrated by: Ayser Salman, Assaf Cohen
- Length: 7 hrs and 35 mins
- Unabridged
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Part memoir and part how-not-to guide, The Wrong End of the Table is everything you wanted to know about Arabs but were afraid to ask, with chapters such as “Tattoos and Other National Security Risks,” “You Can’t Blame Everything on Your Period; Sometimes You’re Going to Be a Crazy Bitch: and Other Advice from Mom,” and even an open letter to Trump. This is the story of every American outsider on a path to find themselves in a country of beautiful diversity.
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Not what I was looking for
- By Amazon Customer on 09-01-22
By: Ayser Salman, and others
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Shanda
- A Memoir of Shame and Secrecy
- By: Letty Cottin Pogrebin
- Narrated by: Dina Pearlman
- Length: 14 hrs and 5 mins
- Unabridged
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The word "shanda" is defined as shame or disgrace in Yiddish. This book, Shanda, tells the story of three generations of complicated, intense twentieth-century Jews for whom the desire to fit in and the fear of public humiliation either drove their aspirations or crushed their spirit. In her deeply engaging, astonishingly candid memoir, author and activist Letty Cottin Pogrebin exposes the fiercely-guarded lies and intricate cover-ups woven by dozens of members of her extended family.
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Beautifully Written!
- By Adele Aron Greenspun on 01-12-23
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Love, InshAllah
- The Secret Love Lives of American Muslim Women
- By: Ayesha Mattu, Nura Maznavi
- Narrated by: Lameece Issaq, Piper Goodeve, Lauren Fortgang, and others
- Length: 9 hrs and 49 mins
- Unabridged
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Romance, dating, sex and - Muslim women? In this groundbreaking collection, 25 American Muslim writers sweep aside stereotypes to share their search for love openly for the first time, showing just how varied the search for love can be - from singles' events and online dating, to college flirtations and arranged marriages, all with a uniquely Muslim twist. These compelling stories of love and romance create an irresistible balance of heart-warming and tantalizing, always revealing and deeply relatable.
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Sex, Love, & Feminism, in the Muslim Women's World
- By Susie on 03-06-13
By: Ayesha Mattu, and others
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Unhooked
- How Young Women Pursue Sex, Delay Love, and Lose at Both
- By: Laura Sessions Stepp
- Narrated by: Ellen Archer
- Length: 9 hrs and 9 mins
- Unabridged
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Here's an eye-opening examination of the "hookup" culture, seen through the experiences of high-school- and college-age women who confront the hard lessons of dating, love, and sex. Stepp follows three groups of young women and comes away with some disturbing insights. Relationships and romance are seen as messy and time-consuming, and love is postponed or, worse, seen as impossible. Many young women can't handle this, and they're being battered physically and emotionally by the new dating landscape.
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Essential Reading for Parents
- By Elton on 04-19-07
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A Stitch of Time
- The Year a Brain Injury Changed My Language and Life
- By: Lauren Marks
- Narrated by: Tavia Gilbert
- Length: 11 hrs and 24 mins
- Unabridged
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Lauren Marks was 27 when an aneurysm ruptured in her brain and left her fighting for her life. She woke up in a hospital soon after with serious deficiencies to her reading, speaking, and writing abilities, and an unfamiliar diagnosis: aphasia. This would be shocking news for anyone, but Lauren was a voracious reader, an actress, director, dramaturg, and pursuing her PhD. At any other period of her life, this diagnosis would have been a devastating blow. But she woke up...different.
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Absolutely wonderful book
- By SJMT on 01-27-19
By: Lauren Marks
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This Close to Happy
- A Reckoning with Depression
- By: Daphne Merkin
- Narrated by: Suzanne Toren
- Length: 9 hrs and 32 mins
- Unabridged
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This Close to Happy is the rare, vividly personal account of what it feels like to suffer from clinical depression, written from a woman's perspective and informed by an acute understanding of the implications of this disease over a lifetime. Taking off from essays on depression she has written for The New Yorker and The New York Times Magazine, Daphne Merkin casts her eye back to her beginnings to try to sort out the root causes of her affliction.
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I should be the last person to recommend this book
- By Mariaposa on 03-04-17
By: Daphne Merkin
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It's Not You
- 27 (Wrong) Reasons You're Single
- By: Sara Eckel
- Narrated by: Nina Alvamar
- Length: 4 hrs and 2 mins
- Unabridged
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Based on her popular Modern Love column, Sara Eckel’s It’s Not You challenges these myths, encouraging singletons to stop picking apart their personalities and to start tapping into their own wisdom about who and what is right for them. Supported by the latest psychological and sociological research, as well as interviews with people who have experienced longtime singledom, Eckel creates a strong and empowering argument to understand and accept that there’s no one reason why you’re single - you just are.
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Good Book
- By Anonymous User on 05-24-20
By: Sara Eckel
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She Made Me Laugh
- My Friend Nora Ephron
- By: Richard Cohen
- Narrated by: Christopher Lane
- Length: 10 hrs and 26 mins
- Unabridged
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Award-winning journalist Richard Cohen, wrote this about his "third-person memoir": "I call this book a third-person memoir. It is about my closest friend, Nora Ephron, and the lives we lived together and how her life got to be bigger until, finally, she wrote her last work, the play, Lucky Guy, about a newspaper columnist dying of cancer while she herself was dying of cancer. I have interviewed many of her other friends - Mike Nichols, Tom Hanks, Steven Spielberg, Meryl Streep, Arianna Huffington.
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Loved it!
- By Leigh Lerro on 10-27-17
By: Richard Cohen
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My Life with Bob
- Flawed Heroine Keeps Book of Books, Plot Ensues
- By: Pamela Paul
- Narrated by: Eileen Stevens, Pamela Paul
- Length: 6 hrs and 55 mins
- Unabridged
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Pamela Paul has kept a single book by her side for 28 years - carried throughout high school and college, hauled from Paris to London to Thailand, from job to job, safely packed away and then carefully removed from apartment to house to its current perch on a shelf over her desk - reliable if frayed, anonymous-looking yet deeply personal. This book has a name: Bob. Bob is Paul's Book of Books, a journal that records every book she's ever read.
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An uncanny mirror and a celebration of book love
- By Cherilyn Parsons on 07-28-19
By: Pamela Paul
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I Can't Complain
- (All Too) Personal Essays
- By: Elinor Lipman
- Narrated by: Elinor Lipman
- Length: 3 hrs and 50 mins
- Unabridged
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Elinor Lipman has populated her fictional universe with characters so utterly real that we feel like they're old friends. Now she shares an even more intimate world with us - her own - in essays that offer a candid, charming take on modern life. Looking back and forging ahead, she considers the subjects that matter most: childhood and condiments, long marriage and solo living, career and politics. Here you'll find the lighthearted: a celebration of four decades of All My Children, a reflection on being Jewish in heavily Irish-Catholic Lowell on St. Patrick's Day, a hilariously unflinching account of her tiptoe into online dating.
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Fabulous!
- By Louise on 09-15-19
By: Elinor Lipman
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Flesh Wounds
- By: Richard Glover
- Narrated by: Richard Glover
- Length: 7 hrs and 12 mins
- Unabridged
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A mother who invented her past, a father who was often absent, a son who wondered if this could really be his family...Richard Glover's favourite dinner-party game is called 'Who's Got the Weirdest Parents?' It's a game he always thinks he'll win. There was his mother, a deluded snob who made up large swathes of her past and who ran away with Richard's English teacher, a Tolkien devotee, nudist and stuffed toy collector.
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Such a Meaningful Reflection
- By Awarenessing on 11-28-15
By: Richard Glover
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Separated @ Birth
- A True Love Story of Twin Sisters Reunited
- By: Anais Bordier, Samantha Futerman
- Narrated by: Emily Woo Zeller
- Length: 8 hrs and 40 mins
- Unabridged
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It all began when design student Anaïs Bordier viewed a YouTube video and saw her own face staring back. After some research, Anaïs found that the Los Angeles actress Samantha Futerman was born in a South Korean port city called Busan on November 19, 1987 - the exact same location and day that Anaïs was born. This propelled her to make contact - via Facebook. One message later, both girls wondered: Could they be twins?
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Touching, heartwarming
- By Kelvin L. Reed on 11-01-22
By: Anais Bordier, and others
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The Secrets of Happy Families
- Surprising New Ideas to Bring More Togetherness, Less Chaos, and Greater Joy
- By: Bruce Feiler
- Narrated by: Bruce Feiler
- Length: 7 hrs and 44 mins
- Unabridged
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Best-selling author and New York Times family columnist Bruce Feiler found himself squeezed between caring for aging parents and raising his children. So he set out on a three-year journey to find the smartest solutions and the most cutting-edge research about families. Instead of the usual family "experts", he sought out the most creative minds - from Silicon Valley to the set of Modern Family, from the country's top negotiators to the Green Berets - and asked them what team-building exercises and problem-solving techniques they use with their families.
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Well worth reading, even if you can't do it all!
- By Amazon Customer on 02-28-13
By: Bruce Feiler
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Laughing Without an Accent
- Adventures of an Iranian American, at Home and Abroad
- By: Firoozeh Dumas
- Narrated by: Firoozeh Dumas
- Length: 5 hrs and 51 mins
- Unabridged
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In the best-selling memoir Funny in Farsi, Firoozeh Dumas recounted her adventures growing up Iranian American in Southern California. Now she again mines her rich Persian heritage in Laughing Without an Accent, sharing stories both tender and humorous on being a citizen of the world, on her well-meaning family, and on amusing cultural conundrums, all told with insights into the universality of the human condition. (Hint: It may have to do with brushing and flossing daily.)
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Sigh
- By Sara on 01-29-14
By: Firoozeh Dumas
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Honestly loved it
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I wish they had a professional narrator
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The secret behind France's astonishingly well-behaved children is here. When American journalist Pamela Druckerman has a baby in Paris, she doesn't aspire to become a "French parent". French parenting isn't a known thing, like French fashion or French cheese. Even French parents themselves insist they aren't doing anything special. But French children are far better behaved and more in command of themselves than American kids....
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What listeners say about There Are No Grown-Ups
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Isabelle Fontes
- 10-12-19
Fan on the writer. Another great book.
Since her last book I became a fan of Pamela Druckerman. (btw her “bringing up bebe” is a must read/listen!).
I was not sure I was enjoying the voice style they chosen, but then it did grow on me, (I often stop listening audiobooks bcse of voice actors choices) After a few chapters I actually enjoyed her reading, (then I found out that the writer was reading it).
It’s a great book, the plot is fun, real, actual and it’s a treat when she mixes french with english.
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- Jill N
- 07-04-24
A Really Enjoyable Read!
This is a very fun and easy read. A heartwarming reflection from one of my favorite authors. I love her style and view on life.
-Jill
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- Charnissa Hastye
- 04-02-20
Enjoyable but....
I have always like everything about French culture. The food, the mannerisms, and diffently the style of French women. Growing up in Germany, European life became my foundation. This shows in the way I dress and my mannerisms. As a black woman I am aware of the stereotypes that are out there about us. Not ALL black women "let themselves go" after a certain age although it does appear that way in general. It's all dependent upon what you are exposed to, no matter your race. Same is true for white women...not all " keep themselves up" after a certain age. All in all, really enjoyed this book. Good insight.
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1 person found this helpful
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- Annette R Rexroad
- 06-07-18
Totally relatable!
This is just the book I needed as I approach another birthday in my late-40s. This is the first book I’ve read by Pamela Druckerman and it will not be the last! Though I didn’t relate to every scenario that she has experienced in her 40s, I totally appreciated her honesty & wittiness when maneuvering through life’s events as a 40 year old expat mother of three. Overall, I enjoyed her writing style and her narration was easy-going & made for a quick listen. Kudos to Madame Druckerman for acknowledging & accepting her own true story as good enough; a very grown up thing to do.
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2 people found this helpful
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- Lauren
- 04-27-20
I Can’t Wait to Read More From This Author
This self assessing book is the perfect balance of light, honest, encouraging, funny, and feminine. Her tale of ever growing and learning is helpful and inspiring. I greatly look forward to reading and listening to more of Pamela Druckerman’s books.
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- MsCheySkye
- 10-05-18
I highly identified with most parts of this book.
I liked the insight into our culture specific approaches to life and relationship. I felt comradery with the author on many points. I did not relate to her view on her marriage or bodily appearance, but that also comforted me in a sense. Thank you!
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1 person found this helpful
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- Olivia Hill
- 11-27-23
Great Storyteller
I will read anything Druckerman writes, even when I have seemingly zero personal application. This book was captivating and informative!
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- TheDan
- 12-20-18
Mediocre
Mediocre, some interesting stories. May be worth reading for some but I struggled through it trying to stay awake.
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- Claire
- 01-10-23
Honest and entertaining
Great follow up to other book. Sometimes the hard truth can make you laugh out aloud, grimace or cry. Pamela brings the truth to her experience of navigating in her 40’s both as an American and one living in France. This book was enjoyable and I recommend it.
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- Reagan
- 04-05-24
Surprisingly funny!
Really enjoyed this from start to finish. Made me feel more “normal”? Haha a very well thought out and researched book.
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