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To Hell with All That

Loving and Loathing Our Inner Housewife

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To Hell with All That

By: Caitlin Flanagan
Narrated by: Julia Fletcher
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About this listen

It's not news that women work, have families, and are conflicted about it. No one needs to be reminded that motherhood is hard. Enter Caitlin Flanagan with a fresh, witheringly funny take on women's lives today, the weddings, nannies, overscheduled children, sex (and the lack of sex), the cult of the "domestic goddess" and its manias for home decorating and gourmet cooking, and the endless tension between working moms and stay-at-home moms.

Part social history, part social commentary, part personal account of the author's own relationship with her mother and her children, To Hell with All That is about the things that interest Flanagan the most: women and children, households and marriages. Presented as a series of essays, it follows the natural course of women's lives. Without offering a prescription for happiness, it defines where Flanagan wants to be: in a world where a woman is depended on, and considered irreplaceable, by people who love her.

©2006 Caitlin Flanagan (P)2006 HighBridge Company
Gender Studies Motherhood Parenting & Families Relationships Social Sciences Funny
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Critic reviews

"The author claims she's not a cook, but in her debut book she proves herself to be one heck of a pot-stirrer." (Publishers Weekly)

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I liked the story and was impressed by her opinion that stay at home moms have a deeper, closer relationship with their children because of quantity time. She compare beautifully her own relationship with her mother and that with her children. The nanny aspect: whether you are well off or have lived in the country where you can afford a nanny, it was enlightening to read about the feelings a mother has with hired help for her children.

One woman’s motherhood journey

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I tried to like this book. I listened through the first several chapters and I just couldn’t do it. I disagree with so much that she says, which is not in itself bad - but the flow is just tedious and she just trying too hard to make her “points”.

Not what I was expecting…

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The subtitle, "Loving and Loathing Our Inner Housewife," leads one to believe that there is some conflict in the author's mind as to a woman's proper destiny. Not so. The author herself is eloquent and well-educated, but strangely disgusted with herself and womankind for shirking what she views as women's work, i.e., cooking, cleaning, child rearing. By chapter 1, she has revealed her anti-choice views, and by chapter 2, she is advocating that women use sex to get what they want from their husbands. She views the feminist movement extremely negatively, needless to say. She even calls herself "uppity" for not being more dedicated to her home and family. I found it impossible to listen to the entire book.

Female author surprisingly sexist

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