What Would Machiavelli Do? Audiobook By Stanley Bing cover art

What Would Machiavelli Do?

The Ends Justify the Meanness

Preview

Try for $0.00
Prime logo Prime members: New to Audible?
Get 2 free audiobooks during trial.
Pick 1 audiobook a month from our unmatched collection.
Listen all you want to thousands of included audiobooks, Originals, and podcasts.
Access exclusive sales and deals.
Premium Plus auto-renews for $14.95/mo after 30 days. Cancel anytime.

What Would Machiavelli Do?

By: Stanley Bing
Narrated by: Philip Bosco
Try for $0.00

$14.95/month after 30 days. Cancel anytime.

Buy for $15.29

Buy for $15.29

Confirm purchase
Pay using card ending in
By confirming your purchase, you agree to Audible's Conditions of Use and Amazon's Privacy Notice. Taxes where applicable.
Cancel

About this listen

A sly send-up of the successful What Would Jesus Do? books, here is a satisfyingly mean, light-hearted approach to business success - the Machiavellian way.

Machiavellians may not get to heaven, but on earth they have a definite edge on the competition. In this pithy and discretely vicious guide, Stanley Bing shows how the Florentine master statesman and political thinker would handle today's myriad corporate challenges, seize the future by the throat, and make it cough up money, power, and superior office space. So, what exactly would Machiavelli do?

He would exploit himself only slightly less than he exploits others.

He would be in love with his destiny.

He would, for the most part, be a paranoid freak.

He would always be at war.

He would cultivate a few well-loved enemies.

He would have a couple of good friends, too.

He would acquire his neighbor.

He would think BIG.

He would move forward like a great shark, eating as he goes.

And much, much more.

More than a road map to success, this hands-on guide will help anyone get what they want, whether or not they deserve it.

Balance the yin of What Would Machiavelli Do? with its yang, Throwing the Elephant.©2002 Stanley Bing (P)2002 HarperCollinsPublishers, Inc.
Comedy & Humor Leadership Management Personal Finance Business
activate_Holiday_promo_in_buybox_DT_T2

Critic reviews

"The ultimate guide to corporate backstabbing." (Entertainment Weekly)
"Successful, amoral satire on how to ruthlessly get to the top without guilt." (Booklist)

What listeners say about What Would Machiavelli Do?

Average customer ratings
Overall
  • 4 out of 5 stars
  • 5 Stars
    120
  • 4 Stars
    72
  • 3 Stars
    40
  • 2 Stars
    14
  • 1 Stars
    13
Performance
  • 4.5 out of 5 stars
  • 5 Stars
    113
  • 4 Stars
    46
  • 3 Stars
    13
  • 2 Stars
    4
  • 1 Stars
    3
Story
  • 4 out of 5 stars
  • 5 Stars
    75
  • 4 Stars
    49
  • 3 Stars
    33
  • 2 Stars
    9
  • 1 Stars
    12

Reviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.

Sort by:
Filter by:
  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars

A very funny tongue in cheek book

I didn't know what to expect from this book, a history lesson, a how to guide. It's both and neither. It's just a funny condemnation of greed in our modern corporate culture.

Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.

You voted on this review!

You reported this review!

4 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    4 out of 5 stars

Horrible advise / Great book

This book is the perfect guide on how not to perform business. It is hilarious and gives great insight on how the C-suit, VPs and executives think and act.

Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.

You voted on this review!

You reported this review!

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    4 out of 5 stars

perfect voice

narrator nails funny side of the sneering sense of superiority conveyed by the book, and just a damn pleasant voice to listen to.

Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.

You voted on this review!

You reported this review!

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars

Fun

Not for literal use but so funny and well read. It will make you laugh and want to be a little more edgy.

Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.

You voted on this review!

You reported this review!

  • Overall
    3 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    4 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars

Entertaining spin on management or business books

have you had to read any of the books about business, or business theory? Bing's satire makes the "normal" books on business topics bearable. You are likely to see your boss, or yourself, in at least one of his examples. Try not to laugh out lound in you meeting when you think about your boss conquering the beach like Coligula though.

Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.

You voted on this review!

You reported this review!

1 person found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars

Nuanced and bombastic satirical take on business.

This isn't the first title by Stanley Bing that I have read, and I am beginning to see a pattern. For that reason this can be considered a joint review of the titles "The Curriculum" & "What Would Machiavelli Do?" as these books encompass the same core theme with very similar approaches.
I can recommend reading "What Would Machiavelli Do?" before "The Curriculum" as it's unique caricatured style is more obvious in Machiavelli.

Bing's work is often bashed by those who open his work expecting one of two things;

a) It is a serious book, to be taken literally and in doing so, the reader will be guaranteed success in all their professional endeavors. (finally, a cheat sheet to life!)

b) an overly moralistic reader chooses to read it for either genuine guidance or simply to scoff at the abhorrence of a narrator they would never associate with.

However, the truth is that Bing's work is a nuanced work of satire. that is as entertaining as it is because, of course, it's grounded in reality.
Truthfully, all the points laid bare by the bombastic narrator are factual. this is what makes Bing's work such a satisfying piece of literature. we would love to refute whats being said, but the well researched book provides example after example of these approaches working. from Warren Buffet to Muammar Gaddafi. Thiel to Bin Laden. the latter of both these examples being where the true nature of Bing's work shows it's head.

When writing satire two golden rules are 1. "To appear to be serious while delivering satire. It is subtle, but effective, when at first glance it looks like you are actually reporting on a real event." and 2. "take things farther than they have already gone". both of which Bing has followed to a Tee. It is the unwavering seriousness and exaggerated abhorrence that give these books their brilliance. However this approach has been a double edged sword, as many readers find themselves forgetting the true nature of these books and believing what is being said at face value.

Bing presents these points from the perspective of a caricatured business mogul who, although successful, is thoroughly and intentionally loathsome. This Character is able to give "unique" perspectives on the world of business, irrefutable by us mere plebeians. Often Bing will close a chapter with a quote from a "successful" business person, that elegantly communicates the ideologies of that chapter. only for it to turn out to be from a notoriously terrible person. Pol Pot for example. these techniques build a thriving and robust world of success among those without morals.

The Pacing of The Curriculum isn't as on the ball as Machiavelli, at 10 hours the joke can wear a little thin compared to the more succinct 3 hour read time of Machiavelli. this being said, I enjoyed all of both.

Philip Bosco is the perfect Narrator in Machiavelli, his austere voice and private school-boy oration build the aforementioned Business man character perfectly. Bing narrates The Curriculum himself, this is often a mistake for an author as they are rarely as good an orator as they are writer. This being said Bing's performance was neutral and unobtrusive to the message, which I mean as a good thing. if you notice the narrators voice it is usually because it is jarring.

The Writing style of both titles is as though it were spoken word. this works excellently for an audio book although I imagine it would grow tiring on print. in Machiavelli this paints a picture of the mogul narrator speaking at an assistant or ghost writer. (think Roger Stirling in the later seasons of Mad Men). While in The Curriculum this same technique gives the reader the impression they have attended a seminar on the subject. This is strengthened by the fact that The Curriculum comes with "Class Notes" in the form of a separate PDF showing graphs and diagrams discussed throughout the book.

Both Books are very entertaining as well as somewhat insightful. The reader should take any advice with a generous pinch of salt and not be to offended by the opinions of the fictional narrator.

I do highly recommend

G D Lillywhite


Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.

You voted on this review!

You reported this review!

  • Overall
    3 out of 5 stars

Short but still a bit too long

For a tounge un cheek book, it goes on a bit long even with its limited number of pages. It is funny, but would have made a better extended essay.

Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.

You voted on this review!

You reported this review!

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars

FRIENDS ACQUAINTANCES COWORKERS WE ALL LOVED IT!!!

What did you love best about What Would Machiavelli Do??

I loved the wit, the humor, the raw reality of it, the comedic delivery of what some take as gospel.

Who was your favorite character and why?

Ted Turner. No. Donald Trump. No wait...Barry Diller...I can't decide. I need to listen to it again. You'd think I would be able to answer this question after listening to snippets of this audio book almost everyday...Bluetooth...in the car...i pod...tablet...at home...where-ever... I got this audio book for entertainment and to poke fun at my driven co-workers...this book is a hoot!!! Looking for a business text book? Well...the Prince would love nothing more than to mold you. : )

Which character – as performed by Philip Bosco – was your favorite?

Stanley Bing. of course.

Was there a moment in the book that particularly moved you?

Shug Knight showing Vanilla Ice the finer points of his position.

Any additional comments?

Phillip Bosco's narration absolutely made this book the entertaining experience that it is.

Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.

You voted on this review!

You reported this review!

2 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    4 out of 5 stars

To Be a Shark, You Have to Think Like a Shark

What did you love best about What Would Machiavelli Do??

It's funny and Philip Bosco does a wonderful job. It's a satirical look at how Machiavellian strategies can be implemented in business. Not only is it very helpful to know when to use these types of means but it's essential to recognize them. Don't be dominated, DOMINATE.

Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.

You voted on this review!

You reported this review!

1 person found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars

Hilarious!

Get it, read it, do it. That's what Machiavelli would do. And then he would fill the comment box with nonsense so Audible would accept the review.

Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.

You voted on this review!

You reported this review!