Preview
  • When Elves Attack

  • A Joyous Christmas Greeting from the Criminal Nutbars of the Sunshine State
  • By: Tim Dorsey
  • Narrated by: Oliver Wyman
  • Length: 5 hrs and 2 mins
  • 4.4 out of 5 stars (396 ratings)

Prime logo Prime members: New to Audible?
Get 2 free audiobooks during trial.
Pick 1 audiobook a month from our unmatched collection.
Listen all you want to thousands of included audiobooks, Originals, and podcasts.
Access exclusive sales and deals.
Premium Plus auto-renews for $14.95/mo after 30 days. Cancel anytime.

When Elves Attack

By: Tim Dorsey
Narrated by: Oliver Wyman
Try for $0.00

$14.95/month after 30 days. Cancel anytime.

Buy for $17.09

Buy for $17.09

Pay using card ending in
By confirming your purchase, you agree to Audible's Conditions of Use and Amazon's Privacy Notice. Taxes where applicable.

Publisher's summary

I’m dreaming of a Serge Christmas...
Palm trees with twinkle lights...
Santa’s big belly protruding over a neon Speedo....

It’s ho, ho, ho time in this hilarious and wacky Florida holiday tale, featuring bighearted psychopath Serge Storms and his sidekick, Coleman. Like Santa, Serge knows who’s been naughty and who’s been nice. Few can give with the generosity and creativity of Serge, and as December 24 rolls around, he is filling up the Serge sleigh with an unforgettable bag of presents.

But before that, it’s all a big free-range Christmas office party, where Serge will be spreading his special cheer. And there’s that last-minute go-for-broke spree at the mall (just beware of those attacking elves - they bite). While you’re there, skip the lame photo on Santa’s lap - Serge will give you a lap ride you’ll never forget. As for that addled elf Coleman, there’s nothing like a white Christmas. Let it snow!

So grab a six-pack, spike the eggnog, and hit the dunes on the beach as Serge and Coleman roast some nuts on an open fire and prove that reindeer really do know how to fly!

©2011 Tim Dorsey (P)2011 HarperCollinsPublishers
activate_Holiday_promo_in_buybox_DT_T2

What listeners say about When Elves Attack

Average customer ratings
Overall
  • 4.5 out of 5 stars
  • 5 Stars
    244
  • 4 Stars
    96
  • 3 Stars
    37
  • 2 Stars
    11
  • 1 Stars
    8
Performance
  • 4.5 out of 5 stars
  • 5 Stars
    262
  • 4 Stars
    57
  • 3 Stars
    27
  • 2 Stars
    3
  • 1 Stars
    8
Story
  • 4.5 out of 5 stars
  • 5 Stars
    222
  • 4 Stars
    80
  • 3 Stars
    36
  • 2 Stars
    14
  • 1 Stars
    9

Reviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.

Sort by:
Filter by:
  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars

I Don't Know about Joyous but Nutbars REALLY Fits!

Sometimes I wonder why I even bother to read the reader reviews -- because I decide to disregard their advice. For instance, many reviewers suggested that a person totally new to the Serge A. Storms series of stories NOT start here. They said to start at the beginning, or at least listen to or read the first novel of the series before this book.

Well, I decided to ignore that advice and started here.

Other reviewers complained about the voice the narrator used for Serge. At first, it was a bit annoying, but after a short time I found that it really helped form a visual image of Serge in my mind much better than a less annoying voice would have. (In fact, I have since begun to listen (I'm just about halfway through) to Florida Roadkill and think the un-remarkable Serge voice there really does not help form a mental image of the character.)

Okay, this story does not include nearly as much Florida history and not as many crazy Floridians as the first novel of the series, but this book might fit into the series the same way the "between the Plums" fit into Janet Evanovitch's Stephanie Plum novels. It really doesn't matter. When Elves Attack is funny and quirky and made me "KNOW" I have to listen to the entire series as soon as possible. So, as soon as the speakers on my laptop spit out "We hope you enjoyed this book," I was at the Audible website to get Florida Roadkill. As soon as part one finished downloading, I started it playing.

It's going to be very hard to wait for credits to arrive to complete the collection. But ... my local public library doesn't have any of the Serge A. Storms novels available in audio, so ... **sigh** I'll have to be patient.

While I am waiting, I think I will listen to When Elves Attack at least one more time. :-)

Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.

You voted on this review!

You reported this review!

14 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    4 out of 5 stars

Fun Holiday Reading for Serge Fans

I have a few books I listen to every holiday season. I'm a big fan of Tim Dorsey and love the Serge Storm series. This playful excursion into the wacky Florida world is the perfect starting point for my Holiday Book Playlist, Next up David Sedaris.

Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.

You voted on this review!

You reported this review!

  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    4 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    4 out of 5 stars

hysterical!!

Loved it!! My 1st Serge bk, &will now go start series in order. Very amusing in a Murdoch (from A Team) crossed w/Dortmunder (from Donald Westlake series) & a twist of Hitman (from Block series)....with definate heavy sprinkles of Plum series (Evanivich).....its going 2b one of those series I listen 2again &again.

Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.

You voted on this review!

You reported this review!

  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    3 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    4 out of 5 stars

Gotta love Tim Dorsey

A good story with enough wit and interesting twists and turns to be a fun read.

Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.

You voted on this review!

You reported this review!

3 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars

Serge is at it again.

This book series should be mandatory listening for anyone considering relocating to Florida.
Florida isn't the shiny, happy postcard crap that gets sent to Sheboygan on a postcard. The seedy underbelly is alive and well and part of what makes this state spectacular. The author is fully aware of this and uses his experience as a Tampa journalist for inspiration. Some of the capers are far-fetched; but in Florida, they're not out of the realm of possibility.

Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.

You voted on this review!

You reported this review!

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    4 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars

Serge

Any additional comments?

I love this author and the performance was great. Only problem is, I just can't get over the Joe Peschi voice of Serge.

Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.

You voted on this review!

You reported this review!

3 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars

I've listened to every single one.

Now that says a lot about me. Listened to the newer ones years back and then started from the beginning here.

Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.

You voted on this review!

You reported this review!

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    4 out of 5 stars

Serge does the holidays

Wow! Tim Dorsey did it again. Non-stop action and hijinks that only Serge and Coleman can do, and in their own way. Many of the quirky characters from Serge's past are here to celebrate the season with this somewhat heartwarming holiday tale. My only complaint is that our time spent with Serge is just not long enough.

Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.

You voted on this review!

You reported this review!

4 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars

Serge is my FAVORITE killer of all time!

Would you consider the audio edition of When Elves Attack to be better than the print version?

Wow, that's a hard one. This is actually the first Tim Dorsey novel that I haven't read, but listened to. I had a much different idea of what Serge would sound like, but I liked his interpretation of Serge.

What did you like best about this story?

The craziness that is Serge A. Storms, as always. Who knew someone could create such a loveable psychopath!

What about Oliver Wyman’s performance did you like?

The use of voices and the wide range he was able to cover. Very talented and enthusiastic.

Who was the most memorable character of When Elves Attack and why?

The G-Unit. How they would get rid of the blonde news anchors, priceless! I aspire to be them when I grow up.

Any additional comments?

Get as much Tim Dorsey as you can into your life. You'll thank me later.

Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.

You voted on this review!

You reported this review!

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars

A Serge Storms treat for the Holidays!

Serge and Coleman are back for a special little holiday treat! What else is there to say? It's psychopathic vigilante Serge Storms and substance abuse sidekick Coleman putting their particular brand of bizarre spin on the season. Followers of Tim Dorsey's tales will remember Jim and Martha Davenport from Triggerfish Twist and Atomic Lobster. Alas, the poor couple are (again) thrown in the middle of a not-so-fictional modern day economic mess. Serge to the rescue, along with help from the G-Unit Grannies, to sort it all out, eliminate bad guys as only Serge can, and triumph for a Merry Christmas to all and to all a goodnight!

Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.

You voted on this review!

You reported this review!

3 people found this helpful