• #178 Growing up in a hoarded home: Sam’s story as the child of a Mum who hoards

  • Feb 28 2025
  • Length: 52 mins
  • Podcast

#178 Growing up in a hoarded home: Sam’s story as the child of a Mum who hoards

  • Summary

    • Come to a Dehoarding Accountability Zoom Session: http://www.overcomecompulsivehoarding.co.uk/ticket
    • Subscribe to the podcast: https://www.overcomecompulsivehoarding.co.uk/subscribe
    • Podcast show notes, links and transcript: http://www.overcomecompulsivehoarding.co.uk/

    In this episode I chat with Sam, who speaks movingly about growing up with a mother who hoards. Now 28, Sam reflects on the claustrophobic environment, the impact on their self-esteem and organisation, and the ongoing journey to rebuild a relationship with food, space, and self-worth. Whether you're a hoarder, the child of somebody who hoards, or you know someone who is, Sam's story offers a vital perspective on living through - and beyond - the hoard.

    • Sam’s experience growing up in a hoarded home
    • Importance of understanding perspectives of those affected by hoarding
    • Sam’s Childhood Experience
    • Description of upbringing in a hoarded home
    • Emotional impact and feelings of claustrophobia and anxiety
    • Lack of emotional and physical space
    • Experiences of shame and comparison with peers
    • Coping Mechanisms and Effects on Daily Life
    • Sam's view of their home as an obstacle course
    • Impact of hoarding on family relationships
    • Lack of privacy and its influence on personal development
    • Impact on Self-Esteem and Mental Health
    • Struggle with self-esteem and self-care
    • Connection between environment and depression
    • Feelings of negativity and isolation
    • School and Social Interactions
    • Effect on academic performance and organisational skills
    • Challenges in completing schoolwork
    • Experiences with friends visiting the home and related anxieties
    • Adolescence and Growing Awareness
    • Anger and frustration during teenage years
    • Lack of external intervention and support
    • Missed opportunities for professional help
    • External Perception and Professional Insight
    • Outside family and societal perceptions of hoarding
    • Drip-feeding experiences to others and feeling of overwhelming others
    • Relationship with Food and Nutrition
    • Negative perceptions of food due to spoiling and smells
    • Ongoing struggle with eating certain foods, particularly fruit
    • Rebuilding a relationship with food as an adult
    • Leaving the Home and Independence
    • Sam’s experience and decision to move out at 20
    • Challenges and processes involved in leaving the parental hoarded home
    • Continued responsibilities in a second hoarded home
    • Long-term Effects on Sam’s Adult Life
    • Influence on career choice and support work with young carers
    • Ongoing challenges with personal organisation and self-care
    • Struggles with mental health and burnout
    • Sam’s Relationship with Family
    • Complex relationship dynamics with parents
    • Lack of understanding from parents regarding Sam’s struggles and decisions
    • Reflection on parental insight into hoarding and its effects on family
    • Current Relationship with Hoarding and Cleaning
    • Sam’s approach to possessions
    • Emotional responses to cleaning and organising tasks
    • Developing the skillset for maintaining an organised living space
    • Message for Others Experiencing Similar Situations
    • Encouragement for other young carers and children of hoarders
    • Importance of self-worth and identity outside of hoarding stigmas
    • Strategies for mental health and personal growth
    • Final Thoughts and Reflections
    • Reflections on how sharing and exploration helps understanding
    • Hope for the interview to be beneficial to listeners with similar experiences
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