• #64 - Stop Being Polite: How to Say the Disruptive Thing

  • Oct 21 2024
  • Length: 34 mins
  • Podcast

#64 - Stop Being Polite: How to Say the Disruptive Thing

  • Summary

  • It's domination programming that teaches us the louder we raise our voices, the faster the other person will capitulate and join our side.

    However, in order to affect real change, the key is to get others to care about what it is we're caring about. And this is a much slower, longer, harder task.

    In this episode, we talk with a caller embarking on a trip to South Africa, who is interested in showing up authentically to her traveling companions, without raising their defenses. The ultimate goal? To get them to care about what she cares about. We discuss:

    • 1:44 How can I show up authentically around my husband's colleagues when we see the world so differently?
    • 3:34 One of the dynamics present is the devaluation of indigenous history and culture
    • 5:55 How to step out of the old domination game
    • 7:43 Making the implicit explicit
    • 12:54 Empathizing with the other side
    • 16:37 The importance of expressing care
    • 18:45 It's enough to introduce a disruptive voice into the room

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