Have you ever locked yourself in the bathroom just to escape the tension at a family gathering?

You're not alone. In this episode, I’m digging into something most people don’t talk about: how silence, especially in families, sends a powerful message.

We often remain quiet to maintain peace, but that silence can come at a heavy cost. Whether it’s avoiding drama, protecting someone’s feelings, or just not knowing what to say, our inaction can hurt more than we think. Today, I’m flipping the script and talking about what it really means to speak up gently, bravely, and with purpose.

✅ Inaction is still a choice, and it sends a message, even without words
✅ Silence often protects the wrong person and hurts the ones we love
✅ Kids learn from our silence just as much as our actions
✅ Avoiding conflict can lead to broken trust and lifelong patterns
✅ Family secrets thrive in silence, but so does abuse and harm
✅ Speaking up doesn’t have to be loud; it just has to be honest
✅ Courage can be taught through small moments and kind truths
✅ Your gut is your guide—trust it
✅ You can survive family relationships without hiding in the bathroom

If this episode stirred something in you, please know support is available:

• RAINN.org – National Sexual Assault Hotline: 1-800-656-HOPE (4673)
  
  
• 988lifeline.org – Suicide & Crisis Lifeline: Call or text 988
  
  

• Kids Help Phone – Call or text 1-800-668-6868 (youth & adults)
  
  
• Talk Suicide Canada – Call 1-833-456-4566 or text 45645
  
  

You are not alone. There is strength in speaking up, and healing in being heard.

Resources & Links:

🔹 Click for From Overwhelmed to Empowered - How to Set Boundaries – Learn how to set and enforce boundaries confidently!
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• Finding Lily’s Inner Magic: A Tale of Building Confidence
• Lily’s Journey to Forgiveness: Letting Go of Hurt and Anger
• Finding Jack’s Magic Within: A Lesson About Kindness
• Consistency is Key: Self-Care Tips with Lily & Zach
• Making the Team: Jack’s Missed Goal
• I Believe You: Self-Care When Your Parent Struggles Emotionally
• Living With Grandma and Grandpa: Jack and Alice’s Challenges

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DISCLAIMER

The Lessons For Life With Gramma Kate Podcast and content posted by Cathy Barker are presented solely for general information, educational, and entertainment purposes. The use of information on this podcast or materials linked from this podcast or website is at the user’s own risk. It is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified healthcare professional, nor is it intended to diagnose or treat any medical condition. Users should not disregard or delay in obtaining medical advice for any medical or mental health condition they may have. They should consult their healthcare professional for any such conditions.

Have you ever judged someone just by what they did, without knowing anything about them? Guess what, people are judging you the same way. Even when we don’t say a word, our actions are telling a story.

In this episode, I dive into why our actions matter more than our words. It’s easy to say we value kindness, honesty, or family. But, are we actually living those values? I also explore something called cognitive dissonance, which is that uncomfortable feeling when we act in ways that contradict our beliefs, and how it can actually help us grow. Additionally, I discuss the beliefs we inherited during our formative years and how to replace them with the ones we consciously choose as adults. If you’re ready to show up as the person you truly want to be, this episode will help you start.

🔑 Key Takeaways:

✅ People form opinions of us based on our actions, not just our words
✅ There’s often a gap between what we say we believe and how we actually behave
✅ Integrity means our actions match our values, even when no one’s watching
✅ Cognitive dissonance is a signal—not a shame trigger—to help us realign
✅ We can let go of old beliefs and choose new ones that fit who we are now
✅ Kids and others learn more from what we do than what we say

🔹 Click for From Overwhelmed to Empowered - How to Set Boundaries – Learn how to set and enforce boundaries confidently!
🔹 Follow me on YouTube for More Episodes
🔹 Subscribe & Leave a Review! Your support helps more people find this content.

• Finding Lily’s Inner Magic: A Tale of Building Confidence
• Lily’s Journey to Forgiveness: Letting Go of Hurt and Anger
• Finding Jack’s Magic Within: A Lesson About Kindness
• Consistency is Key: Self-Care Tips with Lily & Zach
• I Believe You: Self-Care When Your Parent Struggles Emotionally

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DISCLAIMER

The Lessons For Life With Gramma Kate Podcast and content posted by Cathy Barker are presented solely for general information, educational, and entertainment purposes. The use of information on this podcast or materials linked from this podcast or website is at the user’s own risk. It is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional, diagnosis, or treatment. Users should not disregard or delay in obtaining medical advice for any medical or mental health condition they may have. They should seek the assistance of their healthcare professional for any such conditions.

Sometimes it’s not what people say, but how they act that leaves us feeling small, frustrated, or invisible. In this episode, I’m naming 5 sneaky behaviours that show up at home, in our everyday interactions with kids. From eye rolls to sarcastic jabs, I’ll help you recognize the signs, find the right words to respond, and start standing up for yourself calmly and clearly.

These real-life examples and boundary-setting phrases aren’t just for parenting, but can also be used in everyday life with friends, partners, coworkers, and even extended family.

You’ll walk away with tools to name the behaviour, set a boundary, and protect your peace, without guilt or second-guessing yourself.

✅ Learn how to spot subtle signs of disrespect, like eye rolls and ignoring simple requests
✅ Understand why dismissiveness can feel so painful, even when it seems small
✅ See how controlling behaviour shows up in friendships, and how to call it out early
✅ Discover why insults disguised as jokes still hurt—and what to say when it happens
✅ Break down passive-aggression like silent treatment or guilt trips, and how to handle them
✅ Get the words to name the behaviour calmly, without yelling or blaming
✅ Learn how people’s repeated actions reveal their true values—and what it says if we keep allowing it
✅ Understand why staying silent builds resentment and how to start speaking up
✅ Know what to watch for when asking yourself, “When is enough, enough?”
✅ Find peace in knowing that standing up for yourself isn’t selfish—it’s self-respect

Want to keep learning how to teach emotional maturity and set healthy boundaries—without shame or yelling? Follow the podcast and share this episode with someone who needs a little courage boost today.

🔹 Click for From Overwhelmed to Empowered - How to Set Boundaries – Learn how to set and enforce boundaries confidently!
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🔹 Subscribe & Leave a Review! Your support helps more people find this content.

• Finding Lily’s Inner Magic: A Tale of Building Confidence
• Lily’s Journey to Forgiveness: Letting Go of Hurt and Anger
• Finding Jack’s Magic Within: A Lesson About Kindness
• Consistency is Key: Self-Care Tips with Lily & Zach
• I Believe You: Self-Care When Your Parent Struggles Emotionally

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DISCLAIMER

The Lessons For Life With Gramma Kate Podcast and content posted by Cathy Barker are presented solely for general information, educational, and entertainment purposes. The use of information on this podcast or materials linked from this podcast or website is at the user’s own risk. It is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional, diagnosis, or treatment. Users should not disregard or delay in obtaining medical advice for any medical or mental health condition they may have. They should seek the assistance of their healthcare professional for any such conditions.

In this episode, I share what I’ve learned the hard way about trust, betrayal, and how to start healing from toxic relationships. From childhood to adulthood, we’re shaped by the gap between words and actions. When someone’s words sound right but their behaviour tells a different story, it’s not just frustrating, it’s damaging. And over time, it chips away at our self-trust and even our nervous system.

I’ll talk about how to recognize incongruence in relationships, especially when someone seems like a “nice guy” in public but acts completely different behind closed doors. I’ll also share how to begin healing not through grand gestures, but through small, grounded actions that help you rebuild alignment between what you say and do.

Whether you’re in the middle of a toxic dynamic or working to recover from one, this episode will help you stop second-guessing your experience and start choosing actions that reflect who you truly are.

✅ Words matter—but only when they’re backed by consistent actions
✅ Betrayal isn’t just emotional; it impacts your brain and body
✅ Children depend on words early on, but grow to trust actions more later
✅ Toxic relationships often include patterns of apology without change
✅ You can stop participating in unhealthy cycles by choosing different actions
✅ Healing starts when you stop betraying yourself to keep the peace
✅ Incongruence between how someone acts in public vs. private is a major red flag in a toxic relationship

🔹 Click for From Overwhelmed to Empowered - How to Set Boundaries – Learn how to set and enforce boundaries confidently!
🔹 Follow me on YouTube for More Episodes
🔹 Subscribe & Leave a Review! Your support helps more people find this content.

• Finding Lily’s Inner Magic: A Tale of Building Confidence
• Lily’s Journey to Forgiveness: Letting Go of Hurt and Anger
• Finding Jack’s Magic Within: A Lesson About Kindness
• Consistency is Key: Self-Care Tips with Lily & Zach
• I Believe You: Self-Care When Your Parent Struggles Emotionally

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DISCLAIMER

The Lessons For Life With Gramma Kate Podcast and content posted by Cathy Barker are presented solely for general information, educational, and entertainment purposes. The use of information on this podcast or materials linked from this podcast or website is at the user’s own risk. It is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional, diagnosis, or treatment. Users should not disregard or delay in obtaining medical advice for any medical or mental health condition they may have. They should seek the assistance of their healthcare professional for any such conditions.

Many of us are taught to “manage” our emotions—code for hide, suppress, or ignore them. But what if that emotional avoidance is silently sabotaging your success? In this episode, I explore the distinction between controlling and managing emotions, why emotional honesty is a strength (not a weakness), and how emotional awareness can significantly enhance your relationships, confidence, and overall peace of mind.

You’ll learn why being able to name what you feel is one of the most essential life skills no one taught us, and how to start teaching it to the children in your life—because when we can name it, we can tame it. Whether you’re raising kids, healing from your past, or simply want to show up more fully for yourself, this episode is your reminder that true success starts on the inside.

✅ Emotional avoidance—not emotions themselves—often sabotages our success
✅ Controlling emotions means suppressing them; managing emotions means understanding and responding to them
✅ Emotions are signals, not problems—they guide us to what matters most
✅ Using tools like the Emotion Wheel helps identify what we’re feeling
✅ Being emotionally honest is a strength, not a flaw
✅ Every emotion serves a purpose—we're not meant to feel happy all the time.
✅ Kids don’t need fewer feelings; they need better emotional vocabulary
✅ Emotional health is not about perfection; it’s about awareness and intentional responses
✅ Modelling emotional awareness teaches kids how to regulate and respond with kindness
✅ Success isn’t just what you do—it’s also how well you know and care for yourself

🔹 Click for From Overwhelmed to Empowered - How to Set Boundaries – Learn how to set and enforce boundaries confidently!
🔹 Follow me on YouTube for More Episodes
🔹 Subscribe & Leave a Review! Your support helps more people find this content.

• Finding Lily’s Inner Magic: A Tale of Building Confidence
• Lily’s Journey to Forgiveness: Letting Go of Hurt and Anger
• Finding Jack’s Magic Within: A Lesson About Kindness
• Consistency is Key: Self-Care Tips with Lily & Zach
• I Believe You: Self-Care When Your Parent Struggles Emotionally

Instagram: - https://www.instagram.com/lessonsforlifewithgrammakate/

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DISCLAIMER

The Lessons For Life With Gramma Kate Podcast and content posted by Cathy Barker are presented solely for general information, educational, and entertainment purposes. The use of information on this podcast or materials linked from this podcast or website is at the user’s own risk. It is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional, diagnosis, or treatment. Users should not disregard or delay in obtaining medical advice for any medical or mental health condition they may have. They should seek the assistance of their healthcare professional for any such conditions.

Feeling exhausted, resentful, or like you're about to snap? You might be emotionally running on empty. In this episode, I unpack 7 warning signs that you're carrying too much—and how to listen to what your frustration is really telling you.

If you’re pretending you’re “fine,” this conversation will help you pause, reset, and take your next right step.

🔸 Learn why frustration builds quietly
🔸 Discover how to spot early warning signs
🔸 Practice simple mindset shifts to help you reset
🔸 Get tools for expressing your needs without guilt

🔹 Click for From Overwhelmed to Empowered - How to Set Boundaries – Learn how to set and enforce boundaries confidently!
🔹 Follow me on YouTube for More Episodes
🔹 Subscribe & Leave a Review! Your support helps more people find this content.

• Finding Lily’s Inner Magic: A Tale of Building Confidence
• Lily’s Journey to Forgiveness: Letting Go of Hurt and Anger
• Finding Jack’s Magic Within: A Lesson About Kindness
• Consistency is Key: Self-Care Tips with Lily & Zach
• I Believe You: Self-Care When Your Parent Struggles Emotionally

Instagram: - https://www.instagram.com/lessonsforlifewithgrammakate/

Facebook: - https://www.facebook.com/lessonsforlifewithgrammakate

DISCLAIMER

The Lessons For Life With Gramma Kate Podcast and content posted by Cathy Barker are presented solely for general information, educational, and entertainment purposes. The use of information on this podcast or materials linked from this podcast or website is at the user’s own risk. It is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional, diagnosis, or treatment. Users should not disregard or delay in obtaining medical advice for any medical or mental health condition they may have. They should seek the assistance of their healthcare professional for any such conditions.

At 65, I sat at my dining room table with tears in my eyes, whispering, “I don’t want to die with regrets.” I had two quiet dreams: write children’s books and start a podcast. I didn’t know how, but I said yes to myself anyway.

Now, on my 68th birthday, I’m sharing the 7 life lessons I’ve learned since that day. Some brought tears, others unexpected joy. They all reshaped how I see myself and what’s still possible.

• Letting go of panic and perfectionism
  
• Rewriting the beliefs that kept me stuck
  
• Setting boundaries with peace
  
• Making peace with imposter syndrome
  
• Starting over, even when it’s scary
  
  

Whether you're 25, 65, or somewhere in between, this is your reminder:
✨ It’s not too late.
💛 You’re not too old.
🕊 You’re not behind—you’re becoming.

Lyrics quoted in this episode are from “This Is the Time” by Superchick. Used with appreciation for creative inspiration.

Resources & Links:

🔹 Click for From Overwhelmed to Empowered - How to Set Boundaries – Learn how to set and enforce boundaries confidently!
🔹 Follow me on YouTube for More Episodes
🔹 Subscribe & Leave a Review! Your support helps more people find this content.

• Finding Lily’s Inner Magic: A Tale of Building Confidence
• Lily’s Journey to Forgiveness: Letting Go of Hurt and Anger
• Finding Jack’s Magic Within: A Lesson About Kindness
• Consistency is Key: Self-Care Tips with Lily & Zach
• I Believe You: Self-Care When Your Parent Struggles Emotionally

Instagram: - https://www.instagram.com/lessonsforlifewithgrammakate/

Facebook: - https://www.facebook.com/lessonsforlifewithgrammakate

DISCLAIMER

The Lessons For Life With Gramma Kate Podcast and content posted by Cathy Barker are presented solely for general information, educational, and entertainment purposes. The use of information on this podcast or materials linked from this podcast or website is at the user’s own risk. It is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional, diagnosis, or treatment. Users should not disregard or delay in obtaining medical advice for any medical or mental health condition they may have. They should seek the assistance of their healthcare professional for any such conditions.

If your child came home crying because someone made them feel small, you'd do everything possible to help them feel safe again. But what about you?

In this episode, I uncover how the red flags we ignore at work don’t just impact our peace of mind—they quietly model silence and self-abandonment to our children. From sarcastic coworkers to dismissive bosses, subtle workplace disrespect can slowly chip away at your self-worth and go unnoticed until it's deeply ingrained.

You’ll learn how to spot these sneaky signs, why many of us stay quiet (even when something feels wrong), and how to respond with clarity, courage, and compassion. This isn’t about blame—it’s about breaking cycles. For you. For your kids. For your inner peace.

• ✅ How seemingly minor workplace behaviours can signal more profound disrespect
  
• ✅ 7 subtle red flags that sabotage your confidence and clarity
  
• ✅ Why we stay silent—and why that silence teaches our children to do the same
  
• ✅ Simple, assertive scripts to help you speak up with grace
  
• ✅ How to handle sarcasm, vague criticism, boundary-pushing clients, and exclusion
  
• ✅ The mindset shift that starts with awareness, not blame
  
• ✅ The ripple effect of healthy boundaries on your work, home, and parenting life
  
  

Whether you’ve struggled to speak up or never had the tools to name what’s wrong, this episode will help you reclaim your voice—and model what it means to honour your worth.

🔹 Click for From Overwhelmed to Empowered - How to Set Boundaries – Learn how to set and enforce boundaries confidently!
🔹 Follow me on YouTube for More Episodes
🔹 Subscribe & Leave a Review! Your support helps more people find this content.

• Finding Lily’s Inner Magic: A Tale of Building Confidence
• Lily’s Journey to Forgiveness: Letting Go of Hurt and Anger
• Finding Jack’s Magic Within: A Lesson About Kindness
• Consistency is Key: Self-Care Tips with Lily & Zach
• I Believe You: Self-Care When Your Parent Struggles Emotionally

Instagram: - https://www.instagram.com/lessonsforlifewithgrammakate/

Facebook: - https://www.facebook.com/lessonsforlifewithgrammakate

DISCLAIMER

The Lessons For Life With Gramma Kate Podcast and content posted by Cathy Barker are presented solely for general information, educational, and entertainment purposes. The use of information on this podcast or materials linked from this podcast or website is at the user’s own risk. It is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional, diagnosis, or treatment. Users should not disregard or delay in obtaining medical advice for any medical or mental health condition they may have. They should seek the assistance of their healthcare professional for any such conditions.