Ever wonder what Jean-Luc Picard looks like with hair on his head? Find out in “Violations”! It’s an all-new episode of ST:TNGeez . . .

Once again, the Enterprise D is making like a Galaxy Class Uber and ferrying some folks around the quadrant. This time, it’s a trio of Ullians, a race who are able to excavate memories from others using telepathy. Sounds like a fun party trick like pulling a quarter out of someone’s ear or guessing their card, but those tricks usually don’t put people in comas. Before you can say “Berlinghoff Rasmussen,” Troi is in a coma. The crew is stunned, and then Riker falls into a coma! The crew is shocked, and then Bev falls into a coma! The crew is now actively perturbed and seeking solutions! Hey, you think the Ullians have something to do with it? (Worf did!) Well, duh, but Geordi and Data need to find a way to connect the dots and revive their beloved crewmates before anyone else falls prey to this mysterious malady. What or who could be the cause of this coma plague? Will the victims ever wake up? Is it possible this plot could be any more heavy-handed and obvious?

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One thing we can’t get enough of is kids in space! If that’s something you enjoy as well, then join us for “Hero Worship” . . .

Remember the last episode where we got to watch Worf play awkward father to his son, Alexander? Now watch Data play awkward surrogate-father to some kid named Timothy! Seems young Timothy is the sole survivor of a science vessel investigating a “black cluster,” whatever the fuck that is. All we know is everyone on board is dead except Timothy, and the fresh-faced tween is seriously traumatized. So much so that he retreats from his feelings by deciding he’s now an emotionless android just like Data! How is the crew of the Enterprise supposed to figure out what happened to Timothy’s parents if he won’t talk about it? By ordering Data to get the kid to lean into it in hopes that he’ll start sharing. This brilliant idea is courtesy of renowned child expert Captain Jean-Luc Picard, former child hater-turned-Mr. Rodgers-in-space. He even has a sweater to change into! Will the crew discover the mystery of what destroyed the science vessel? Will Data get a new job grooming young boys’ hair? Will anyone ever realize that having children on a spaceship is a really dumb idea? Find out on this exciting, all-new episode of ST:TNGeez!

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The Enterprise is coursing around the galaxy when they’ve been asked to aid in some propulsion event that Geordi gets a space bone about when something even more exciting happens… Worf’s Mom shows up and his son! Hold onto your seats everyone, this space adventure is about to get all up in your… responsibilities! That’s right, just like in the original series when Kirk rolled up his sleeves and was about to get to fist-cuffing, when his five year old son shows up and… wait, that didn’t happen! Or remember when the original crew had to figure out how to save a death engine from eating another planet and suddenly the episode became all about day care? Wait! That didn’t happen either. It’s Worf bonding with Alexander, his son, who he could give two Klingon shits about, or KLARTS — Picard’s got his jacket back on again and doing his best to coach his Klingon Security Commander when everyone including Bev, his teacher, are all

But hey, this episode has a gnarly warp wave! An exploding spaceship, and the bridge… it rocks and people fall out of their chairs! — including Deana Troi! Oh no! Troi, I think she might have bruised her Telepathy! And her hip! All this and Skeletor is back! Skela-flipping-tor! Can you believe it? Skeletor from Worf’s Holodeck calisthenics program!

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Ever wanted to time travel right onto the bridge of your favorite Galaxy-Class starship? Hey, us, too, but we’ll have to settle for watching Max Headroom do it in “A Matter of Time” on this all-new episode of ST:TNGeez . . . NOW!

The Enterprise is on its way to Penthara IV for an emergency rescue mission when Worf notices a temporal anomaly has left something behind. Picard tells Ensign Felton to flip the bitch, and before you know it, he has to take a jump to the left (or is it a step to the right) to allow Berlinghoff Rasmussen to beam aboard. Our new friend claims to be a historian from the 26th century here to hang out and ask some questions and generally be a pain in the ass. Picard seems amused enough at the start, but Rasmussen quickly gets on everyone’s nerves. He keeps poking around and dropping cryptic hints while the crew is trying to save a planet from the after effects of an asteroid’s impact. Rasmussen claims he’s on board to witness history, but he just might have an ulterior motive. Will Geordi and Data be able to cobble together a solution that will save Penthara IV? Will Worf get to backhand Rasmussen? Will our visiting time traveller get to make some time with our beloved Bev? Find out in this exciting new episode of ST:TNGeez, Not Another Star Trek Podcast.

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Have you ever wanted to watch Mr. Spock go to meeting after meeting after meeting? Then do we have an episode for you! It’s “Unification, Part II” and it’s an all-new episode of ST:TNGeez, Not . . . NOW!

Last time, we waited a whole episode to catch a glimpse of Mr. Spock on Romulus. This time we get a whole episode full of him. Here’s Spock in a cave, talking. Here’s Spock in a restaurant, talking. Here’s Spock in some guy’s office, talking. And all the while, Picard and Data are there, sometimes dressed as Romulans, and sometimes not, talking to Spock. So what’s all the talk about? Why reuniting the Vulcans and the Romulans into one big, happy, pointy eared family. It seems like there’s a movement on Romulus to make it happen with Senator Pardek promising to connect Spock to all the right people, like a group of eager citizens and a smarmy Proconsul. Sounds good, doesn’t it? I mean, it’s not like the Romulans would be plotting anything underhanded, right? Right? In the meantime, Riker and the rest of the cast are trying to figure out who stole a Vulcan ship from a junkyard. Wait, did we say “Vulcan ship”? A Vulcan ship goes missing while Spock, Picard, and Data are on Romulus talking about reunification? Meh. Probably just a huge coincidence. Anywho . . . Will Picard uncover the Romulan plot? Will Data find a new friend in this old ass Vulcan? Will Spock ever shut the fuck up? Jolan true, Dave!

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The Enterprise and crew have been coursing around the galaxy, watching dying stars, corking up ship-in-bottle catastrophes, and trying not to have sci-fi adventures -- like in the original series with Kirk and Spock and shit. They aren’t going to have any of that here, either, but they will have Spock. Kinda. Maybe. After receiving news that the venerable ambassador might have defected to the Romulan home world, conveniently called Romulus, Picard and Data engage in some Romulan cosplay and take a long, long, long time to finally meet up with everyone’s favorite Vulcan. In the meantime, Riker and the rest of the crew are investigating some hijinx in the Federation junkyard because they need to have something to do while Picard and Data are busy making Trek history meeting Mr. freaking Spock! Will Riker and crew discover the secret of the missing junkyard ships? Will Data discover he really likes shoulder pads? Will Picard get any sleep? Find out in this exciting new episode!

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The crew of the Enterprise D is used to Riker bringing something back from Risa, but this time it’s a little more sinister than a run of the mill space STD. It’s something even more contagious, a game! Soon it’s sweeping the ship, and all the crew members and the families and the puppies are addicted to it, and we mean addicted! So addicted, Bev and Riker knock out Data, so the workaholic robot doesn’t spoil their fun. Good thing Wesley Crusher is back, and good thing Ashley Ju . . . Uh, Robin Lefler is here, so they can team up and save the day. Unfortunately for them, the crew ain’t having it, and the chase is on. Will Wes and Robin be able to get the crew into rehab? Will the Ktarian named Etana be successful in hijacking the Enterprise? Will some please, please, please stop Riker from going to Risa?

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What happens when the Enterprise malfunctions, decks are separated from each other and the commanding officer is Lieutenant Troi -- Well “Damages” is what happens! The Enterprise encounters a dying star or a crystalline entity, or the Borg and things go more out of control than ever -- wait, what disables this Galaxy Class spaceship?

Point being, the bridge crew is separated as Picard is on a field trip with kids, Data’s off oiling his completely functional… and Riker is, where is Riker? Did we tell you somehow Worf and Keiko are stuck together ? Anyhow, the regulars are off the Bridge except for Troi and O’brian who’s never there, but still… Ensign Ro is back! This crack team squabbles over what to do but eventually count on Troi to lead them through the Enterprise’s disaster. Meanwhile, Picard is injured in a turbo lift with a bunch of kids, Riker is sussing something out with Data, Bev LaForge are hanging for their dear lives, and Worf is delivering the next O’brien with Keiko…All of this happens on board our Galaxy Class Enterprise like it’s the disaster film "Airport” from the 70’s and more! Will Troi be able to not use her powers and put on her big girl pants to lead the Enterprise? Will Picard be able to command a bunch of rascals out of an elevator shaft? Will Worf be able to Klingon-Duala? Find out in this exciting episode of ST:TNGeez, Not Another Star Trek Podcast!

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