In this episode, we’re back with part 2 of our series on John Gottman’s relationship principles. We’re talking about the practical stuff – how to strengthen your relationship daily.

We go through things like building better love maps, how to keep appreciation alive, why those little moments of connection matter, and what to do when you’re stuck having the same fight over and over again.

If you’ve ever felt like you love your partner but keep missing each other, or like small issues keep snowballing, this one’s for you.

If you liked this episode, let us know in the comments and don't forget to subscribe!

Timestamps: (00:00) Introduction

(02:38) Today's topic: John Gottman part 2 – How to strengthen your relationship

(08:23) Enhancing your love maps – Know your partner’s world and stay curious

(17:37) Nurturing fondness and admiration – Focus on what you appreciate about your partner

(23:12) Turning toward each other – Why small bids for connection matter

(28:49) Let your partner influence you – Making decisions as a team

(33:32) Solving solvable problems – Start with the small stuff

(39:12) Overcoming gridlock – Move from conflict to meaningful dialogue

(44:12) Creating shared meaning – Build a life you both value

The Four Horsemen of Relationships – Are You Doing These Without Knowing It?

We’re finally back from our spring break! In this first part of two, we explain why Dr. John Gottman’s 4 signs that predict divorce—criticism, contempt, defensiveness, and stonewalling—are so powerful, and how they often show up without us even realizing it.

We break these down by analyzing a viral clip of Alec and Hilaria Baldwin, using it as a real-life example of how these patterns play out in everyday relationships.

Timestamps (00:00) Coming up in this episode
(01:31) Dave’s Caribbean cruise
(04:51) Analyzing the Alec and Hilaria Baldwin clip
(17:38) Today’s topic: John Gottman’s Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work – The 4 Horsemen of Relationships
(26:03) The first horseman: Criticism – when complaints turn into character attacks
(31:53) The second horseman: Contempt – the most dangerous relationship killer
(37:46) The third horseman: Defensiveness – why it makes things worse
(42:11) The fourth horseman: Stonewalling – the silent relationship shutdown
(47:15) How can you avoid the Four Horsemen?

Dr. Dana Borchert sits down with Rob and Dave to push back on their views about toxic masculinity, non-violent communication, and more. It’s a fun, honest conversation where Dana offers fresh insights and challenges the guys to think differently about some things they’ve said before. Hit play and join the conversation! 🎧🧠

Don't forget to like and subscribe if you like our content! 👍

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Timestamps

(00:00) - Coming up
(00:26) - Introduction: Who is Dr. Dana Borchert?
(04:06) - Rob's wall update
(05:16) - Dana challenges our take on toxic masculinity
(12:52) - Rob's conversation with his wife
(16:06) - The problem with the term "toxic masculinity"
(22:23) - Non-violent communication
(26:39) - The benefits of non-violent communication
(28:53) - Facing our insecurities
(33:04) - What is toxic femininity?
(36:34) - The trad wife movement
(41:16) - Raising emotionally aware boys & the "Mrs. degree"
(43:22) - Why do we need rules and restraints in conversations?

In this episode of Shrink Space, we explain the psychology of loyalty in politics, the workplace, and personal relationships through the lens of one of today’s most polarizing geopolitical dynamics: Donald Trump vs. Volodymyr Zelensky.

- What drives loyalty, even in the face of conflict?
- How do political leaders influence public trust and allegiance?
- What parallels can we draw between political loyalty and commitment in our personal and professional lives?

Tune in for a discussion about the psychological and social factors that shape who we stand by and why.

🎧 Subscribe now for more expert insights into human behavior and psychology

How does someone become an abuser? Is it trauma, control issues, or something even darker? In this episode, psychologists Dave and Rob break down the psychology behind abusive behavior—what creates someone like Brian Laundrie, what triggers violence, and whether abusers even recognize what they’re doing.

They also explain the cycle of abuse, the mistakes police made when they encountered Gabby Petito, and the similarities between abusers and cult leaders. If you want to understand the warning signs before it’s too late, this is the episode for you.

David and Rob are speaking on this topic using their backgrounds in psychology. However, the purpose of this podcast is informational and entertainment. As a result, the information presented here is not intended as psychological advice.

If you think you might be in an abusive relationship or are concerned that someone you know might be, you can find resources at https://www.thehotline.org

What do we really mean by toxic masculinity? And does toxic femininity exist too? In this episode of Shrink Space, psychologists Dave and Rob discuss what masculinity is, what makes traits toxic and how it may impact our children. Hit play and let's discuss!

Do you agree with what we're saying or do you think we missed something? Let us know in the comments and don't forget to like the video! 👍💬

Timestamps:
(00:00) Intro
(00:21) Update on the situation with our boss
(01:51) The talent show
(04:22) Today's Topic: Toxic Masculinity
(07:38) What does it mean to be masculine?
(11:00) Defending your wife
(13:51) What is TOXIC masculinity?
(18:39) Are we just trying to erase masculinity?
(20:17) Are we expecting boys to suppress their masculine traits?
(22:45) Masculinity as a trait
(23:31) Self-destructive behaviors
(24:25) Toxic Femininity: Does it exist?
(27:13 )The difference between Toxic Masculinity and Toxic Femininity
(30:41) Why do we label toxic behaviors with gender?
(32:57) Moms vs. dads: How they interact with their kids differently
(36:04) Is masculine behavior learned or innate?
(38:10) How we show affection with our kids
(40:12) How we interact with other men
(42:06) Toxic Masculinity on social media
(43:04) Rob's relationship with his father-in-law
(44:40) Crying in public
(48:21) Final thoughts

In this episode, Rob and Dave discuss the complex dynamics of cancel culture. Rob shares his recent health struggles and his evolving views on language and communication. They explore the balance between addressing societal issues and the potential unintended consequences of cancel culture, particularly its impact on relationships and societal discourse. They also delve into the nuances of communication within professional and informal settings, touching on the importance of directness versus sensitivity. Tune in for an insightful conversation that challenges the extremes and seeks a balanced perspective.00:00 Introduction and Catching Up00:37 Rob's Health Struggles02:33 Language and Communication Rant04:02 Psych Speak in Everyday Life07:03 The Impact of Over-Politeness10:51 Nonviolent Communication Debate12:35 The Unraveling of Society20:56 Cancel Culture Discussion30:01 The Psychology Behind Cancel Culture32:04 The Emotional Reward of Canceling Celebrities34:24 The Value and Downsides of Cancel Culture37:03 The Role of the Me Too Movement39:30 Comedy and Cancel Culture41:48 The Impact of Cancel Culture on Society45:23 Navigating Sensitivity and Authenticity50:45 Concluding Thoughts on Cancel Culture

Are Awards Really Important? A Deep Dive with Rob and DaveIn this episode, Rob and Dave discuss the significance of awards, specifically focusing on entertainment awards like the Grammys and Oscars. They share personal experiences and perspectives on why people care about awards, whether they are still relevant, and the psychological impact of recognition and status. They also debate intrinsic versus extrinsic motivation, the subjective nature of awards, and if these accolades genuinely reflect the best in a field. Join them for a nuanced conversation about awards, recognition, and what truly matters in creativity and achievement.00:00 Catching Up: Parenting Challenges01:11 Award Shows and the Grammys02:19 Fashion Highlights and Critiques04:26 Kanye West and Bianca's Entrance09:32 The Relevance of Award Shows13:28 Personal Connection to Awards18:35 The Value of Awards and Recognition29:42 The Distortion of Rewards31:34 Intrinsic vs Extrinsic Motivation32:19 The Impact on Creativity33:59 The Changing Landscape of Movies35:48 The Role of Status and Recognition40:19 Subjectivity and Bias in Awards43:06 Personal Reflections on Awards47:15 The Future of Awards53:51 Conclusion and Viewer Engagemen