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Tricia joins Rebecca and Naomi to share her journey from homeschooled student to college graduate and beyond, offering valuable insights for first-generation students navigating higher education without traditional guidance.

• Following curiosity and determination despite lack of traditional educational pathways
• Navigating college applications and standardized tests without guidance counselors
• Balancing full-time work with educational pursuits
• Finding funding for undergraduate education through grants and scholarships
• The challenges of financing graduate education without institutional support
• The value of on-campus living for building social connections and networks
• Taking risks to teach in Texas and Japan after graduation
• The importance of maintaining identity through continuous learning
• How small steps build confidence for bigger life changes
• The reality that educational journeys rarely follow straight lines
• The value of asking questions and seeking information when facing obstacles

Keep bringing on your questions! Message us at uncoveredlifebeyond@gmail.com with your thoughts and experiences.

Connect with Tricia:

https://www.facebook.com/patricia.a.lewis

https://bsky.app/profile/hopenafuture.bsky.social

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Patricia Lewis shares her remarkable journey from financial struggle to stability by challenging traditional gender roles and overcoming the shame of accepting public assistance. After marrying her husband who she met while teaching in Japan, they returned to the U.S. to start a family in the midst of the Great Recession. Through the birth of their five sons and many job changes, they faced years of financial hardship before finding an unconventional solution.

Key points from Tricia's story:

• Growing up Mennonite with a father who taught practical skills regardless of gender
• Becoming reacquainted with her husband online while teaching in Japan and developing a relationship built on honest communication
• Struggling through dozens of jobs, medical bills, and raising five boys born via C-sections within eight years
• Confronting the shame of accepting public assistance while living at poverty level
• Transforming their finances by flipping traditional roles – Tricia becoming the primary breadwinner while her husband drove a school bus and homeschooled their sons
• Learning to counter negative self-talk and treat ourselves with the same kindness we show others
• Practical tips for financial independence: knowing your accounts, passwords, and financial situation
• Creative ways to stretch resources like buying turkeys in bulk during sales

For women facing financial insecurity, know what your plan is going forward. Identify your networks, consider your abilities, and understand your current financial situation – including accounts, debts, and assets. Don't let shame prevent you from using available resources designed to help you reach stability.

Connect with Tricia:

https://www.facebook.com/patricia.a.lewis

https://bsky.app/profile/hopenafuture.bsky.social

Thanks for listening! Connect with us via

• Facebook: Uncovered: Life Beyond
• Instagram: @uncoveredlifebeyond
• Email: uncoveredlifebeyond@gmail.com
• Website: https://www.buzzsprout.com/2171591

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Rebecca and Naomi explore how men in progressive spaces often default to patriarchal behaviors when challenged, despite claiming to be allies and feminists.

• Deconstruction requires ongoing work rather than simply changing labels or terminology
• Tim Whitaker and The New Evangelicals controversy reveals common patterns of male entitlement
• Men who claim to be allies often revert to control tactics when their authority is questioned
• The "fake ally playbook" includes expecting women to manage emotional labor without recognition
• Weaponizing women's trauma to discredit their concerns is a common gaslighting technique
• Mediation often functions as image management rather than genuine reconciliation
• Women are socialized to treat men's perspectives as authoritative while questioning their own
• Authentic allies demonstrate humility, share domestic responsibilities, and listen without defensiveness
• Healthy relationships require mutuality and shared power, not dominance and control
• Women need to recognize their needs matter and speaking up is an invitation to authentic relationship

Join us next week as we conclude our financial autonomy series with actionable steps that stay-at-home parents can take to protect themselves financially.

Links

https://www.tnereckoning.com/summary

https://baptistnews.com/article/that-time-i-got-an-angry-call-from-the-subject-of-an-article-about-anger-and-abuse/

https://www.instagram.com/p/C4yVfcwPSMl/

https://terryreal.com/

https://karljforehand.substack.com/p/getting-out-of-survival-mode/

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• Email: uncoveredlifebeyond@gmail.com
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Financial autonomy is crucial to everyone's wellbeing, but what happens when one partner refuses to engage in conversations about money? We explore the dynamics of financial stonewalling and share practical strategies for taking ownership of your adult responsibilities.

• Financial issues can become control mechanisms when one partner refuses to engage in good faith
• Both men and women have been socialized to question women's financial abilities and understanding
• Red flags include: lack of access to accounts, asking for money like an allowance, monitored spending, refusal to share information
• Religious contexts often use spiritual language to validate financial dependence and lack of autonomy
• Taking steps toward financial independence isn't being sneaky—it's being smart
• Running your credit report helps identify accounts in your name you may not be aware of
• Opening your own bank account provides security and independence
• Understanding your own values helps guide decision-making when faced with resistance
• Having financial options doesn't mean planning to leave—it means staying by choice, not necessity
• A financially independent woman isn't a threat—she's simply someone who refuses to be stuck

Join us next time to discuss practical ways a stay-at-home parent can build financial autonomy--beyond the obvious ways like winning the lottery!

Resources We Mentioned in the Show (or should have)

Terry Real Homepage

What is Financial Abuse? (The Hotline)

Values Clarification

Learn about your credit report and how to get a copy (USAGov)

Your Money Matters: A Guide to Financial Independence for Women

Financial Literacy for Women

Financial Freedom: Women, Money, and Domestic Abuse

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• Email: uncoveredlifebeyond@gmail.com
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Financial autonomy for stay-at-home parents means having options and being able to exercise them without justification or permission, even when you're not collecting a paycheck. We examine how historical patterns like the law of coverture have evolved into modern expectations that devalue domestic labor while romanticizing the stay-at-home parent role.

• Economists estimate the unpaid labor of stay-at-home parents is worth over $100,000 annually
• The narrative of who's "supporting" whom needs to be flipped - the stay-at-home parent enables the working parent's career
• Financial autonomy doesn't undermine partnership but strengthens it by creating equality
• Access to separate accounts, having your own money, and retirement savings are practical steps toward autonomy
• Teaching financial literacy to children, especially daughters, helps break intergenerational patterns
• Both spouses deserve financial autonomy regardless of who's bringing home a paycheck
• Feeling resentful about finances often signals a boundary violation that needs addressing

Your work is valuable, and your contribution is real whether you're getting a paycheck or not. Share your thoughts on social media, and join us next time as we discuss what to do when your partner won't play fair.

Links

The Way We Never Were American Families and the Nostalgia Trap by Stephanie Coontz

Domestic Dialogue: Flipping the Labor Script

Notes on Project 2025 by Rachel Hurley

End the Dysfunctional Cycles in Your Relationship and Stay in Love for Life (Terry Real)

If we empower women to work outside the house without expecting men to work inside the house…

The Fair Play Book | Fair Play Life by Eve Rodsky

The Documentary | Fair Play Life

THE EMOTIONAL LABOR SERIES: Let's Talk Emotional Labor and Mental Load - Bare Marriage

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• Email: uncoveredlifebeyond@gmail.com
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Rebecca and Naomi tackle the often-taboo subject of financial freedom for women breaking away from restrictive traditions and relationships where money is used as a form of control. They explore the intentional ways financial dependence is created and maintained, especially in religious contexts.

• Many women go from parents' homes to married life with no financial experience or autonomy
• Financial manipulation often disguises itself as protection or spiritual guidance
• Staying in the dark about finances doesn't exempt you from legal responsibility
• The importance of having your own bank account, even with minimal funds
• Learning to advocate for yourself when patronized about financial matters
• Religious communities frequently use spiritual language to maintain financial control
• Breaking financial dependency cycles is difficult but leads to greater security
• Resources like financial podcasts, budget tools, and campus resources can help build literacy
• Starting small and learning basic terminology empowers better decision-making
• Taking control of your finances compounds not just money but internal confidence

Send us your questions or share what financial advice you'd give your younger self through the link at the top of our show notes. Our next episode will explore "the secret salary of a stay-at-home parent" and how that factors into women's financial independence.

Links to Resources
@Marriageishappening on the struggle to be heard
Family Budget Tracker Bundle Google Sheets, Expense & Bill Tracker, Debt Payoff Sinking Funds, Paycheck Budget (Etsy)
Financial Feminist Podcast (she has thoughts about Dave Ramsey)
Kathryn Anne Edwards (@Keds_economist)
How to Freeze and Unfreeze Your Credit with All 3 Bureaus

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• Facebook: Uncovered: Life Beyond
• Instagram: @uncoveredlifebeyond
• Email: uncoveredlifebeyond@gmail.com
• Website: https://www.buzzsprout.com/2171591

Subscribe (for free) to Uncovered: Life Beyond on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music, or wherever you get your podcasts so you'll never miss an episode!

What topics at the intersection of education, high-demand religion, career, parenting, and emotional intelligence are of interest to you? Help us plan future episodes by taking this quick listener survey. We appreciate your input very much!

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We're proud to introduce our friend, Rebekah Mui, who has traveled around the world in pursuit of education and more authentic faith expressions. Using her recent Facebook post as a point of departure, we discuss the role of mentorship in academia, the responsibilities of first-gen students to open doors for those who follow, and why deep learning necessarily leads to humility. (Content warning for a few spicy takes!)

• Driving your own car as a metaphor for religious deconstruction
• Discussing the role of mentorship in academia for first-generation students
• Strategies for advocating for oneself in educational settings
• Building meaningful connections and a supportive network
• The impact of cultural background on perspectives and narratives

Thank you for listening! We appreciate your support.

The post that started it all.

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This episode is a call to reframe our past experiences in high-demand religious communities (especially those of Anabaptist origin) as preparation for meaningful action in our world today. Hosts Naomi and Rebecca explore the significance of core beliefs over outward symbols, advocating for a reclaiming of personal values and the potential for community engagement.

• The incongruity of Christian nationalism and historic Anabaptist beliefs
• Recalling the positive qualities of Plain communities
• How resources from past experiences can be relevant in our lives today
• The tremendous power of nonviolent resistance in social change
• Deploying our communal networks and mutual aid in precarious times
• The significance of empathy and kindness in human connections

Links to Sources and Resources

"The Success of Nonviolent Civil Resistance" by Erica Chenoweth

The Rhetoric of Agitation and Control, Third Edition, by John W. Bowers, Donovan J. Ochs, Richard J. Jensen, David P. Schulz

Chapter 9 The Rhetoric of Agitation and Control: An Interface

The Sword and Trumpet Bookstore

Janna Hunter-Bowman on Anabaptist Nonresistance

Letter from Birmingham Jail (1963)

Historical Context of Letter from Birmingham Jail (1963)

Danielle Bayard Jackson on building community

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• Facebook: Uncovered: Life Beyond
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• Email: uncoveredlifebeyond@gmail.com
• Website: https://www.buzzsprout.com/2171591

Subscribe (for free) to Uncovered: Life Beyond on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Google Podcasts, Amazon Music, or wherever you get your podcasts so you'll never miss an episode!

What topics at the intersection of education, high-demand religion, career, parenting, and emotional intelligence are of interest to you? Help us plan future episodes by taking this quick listener survey. We appreciate your input very much!