Young Adult Humor

Septimus Heap, the seventh son of the seventh son, disappears the night he is born, pronounced dead by the midwife. That same night, the baby's father, Silas Heap, comes across an abandoned child in the snow—a newborn girl with violet eyes. Who is this mysterious baby girl, and what really happened to the Heaps' beloved son Septimus?

In the remarkable, bizarre, and heart-wrenching summer before Cullen Witter’s senior year of high school, he is forced to examine everything he thinks he understands about his small and painfully dull Arkansas town. His cousin overdoses; his town becomes absurdly obsessed with the alleged reappearance of an extinct woodpecker; and most troubling of all, his sensitive, gifted fifteen-year-old brother, Gabriel, suddenly and inexplicably disappears.

By day, 17-year-old Jo Kuan works as a lady's maid for the cruel daughter of one of the wealthiest men in Atlanta. But by night, Jo moonlights as the pseudonymous author of a newspaper advice column for the genteel Southern lady, "Dear Miss Sweetie". When her column becomes wildly popular, she uses the power of the pen to address some of society's ills, but she's not prepared for the backlash that follows when her column challenges fixed ideas about race and gender.

Cat doesn't mind living in the shadow of his sister, Gwendolen, the most promising young witch ever seen on Coven Street. But trouble starts brewing the moment the two orphans are summoned to live in Chrestomanci Castle. Frustrated that the witches of the castle refuse to acknowledge her talents, Gwendolen conjures up a scheme that could throw whole worlds out of whack.

Haley Patterson has had a crush on golden boy Bryce Colton for ages. But when she hears a rumor that he hooked up with her, she gives him a choice: be her boyfriend for a month to show other guys that she’s dateable - despite her overprotective and very intimidating brothers - or deal with the angry, cage-fighting boyfriend of the girl with whom he actually did hook up.

Grammy Winner for Best Spoken Comedy Album
Performed by George Carlin himself, and filled with thoughts, musings, questions, lists, beliefs, curiosities, monologues, assertions, assumptions, and other verbal ordeals, Brain Droppings is infectiously funny.

New! Don't miss our AudibleComedy combo, featuring original humor from standups Greg Proops and Steve Marmel.

Meet Adrian Mole, a hapless teenager providing an unabashed, pimples-and-all glimpse into adolescent life. Writing candidly about his parents' marital troubles, the dog, and his life as a tortured poet and 'misunderstood intellectual', Adrian's painfully honest diary is still hilarious and compelling reading thirty years after it first appeared.

A Boston Globe-Horn Book Honor Book and ALA Notable and Best of the Year in Young Adult Fiction, Howl's Moving Castle is by acclaimed fantasy writer Diane Wynne Jones and was transformed into an Academy Award nominated animated motion picture by Hayao Miyazaki. On a rare venture out from her step-mother's hat shop, Sophie attracts the attention of a witch, who casts a terrible spell transforming the young girl into an old crone.

In their sixth adventure, Sabrina and Daphne must defend their friend Mr. Canis (aka the Big Bad Wolf ) when he is put on trial by the Everafters for his past crimes. It'll take all of the sisters' skills to outwit the merciless Queen of Hearts, who is determined to kick Canis and the Grimms out of Ferryport Landing - forever.

This seventh entry picks up right from the cliffhanger ending of Tales from the Hood, as Sabrina and Daphne's parents finally awake from their sleeping spell. But this is no time for complacency. The family must help Prince Charming's Everafter army fight the Scarlet Hand, and Sabrina must confront the deadly and mysterious Master.

Grey has improved a ton with the help of his friends, and he's closing in on the top tier of players. But then his closest friend announces that he's been asked to join a new squad on the top tier and leaves them in hopes of making the top five with his new squad. Grey is devastated, and his team struggles. He falls back several ranks and begins to wonder if it's even possible to escape the game this season. Some players have been there for many seasons...some aren't even trying to leave because they like it so much. Maybe he should just accept it as his life.

New York Times best-selling author Joe Schreiber pens a funny, action-packed novel that is equal parts Ferris Bueller’s Day Off and La Femme Nikita. It’s prom night, and Perry is looking forward to playing a gig with his band in New York City. But when his mother makes him take their quiet and geeky Lithuanian exchange student to the dance, he finds himself on a reckless ride through Manhattan—in his dad’s red Jaguar—with a trained assassin.

Samantha “Reena” Barker is out of her element—WAY out. As the first (and only) human at an elite intergalactic university, Reena has somehow become an unofficial representative of the entire human race. No pressure, right? Navigating a campus full of aliens is hard enough, but add a grumpy, musically-challenged roommate to the mix, and things get seriously awkward. Thankfully, it’s not all bad. She’s got Panda, a quirky alien friend with an endearing love for humans. And then there’s the devastatingly handsome alien prince who might just have a crush on her. Too bad his ex-...

Classic movie buff Bailey "Mink" Rydell has spent months crushing on a witty film geek she only knows online by "Alex". Two coasts separate the teens until Bailey moves in with her dad, who lives in the same California surfing town as her online crush. Faced with doubts (what if he's a creep in real life - or worse?), Bailey doesn't tell Alex she's moved to his hometown. Or that she's landed a job at the local tourist-trap museum. Or that she's being heckled daily by the irritatingly hot museum security guard, Porter Roth - a.k.a. her new arch-nemesis.

This true story - as true as Lemony Snicket himself - begins with a puzzling note under his door: You had poison for breakfast. Following a winding trail of clues to solve the mystery of his own demise, Snicket takes us on a thought-provoking tour of his predilections: the proper way to prepare an egg, a perplexing idea called “tzimtzum”, the sublime pleasure of swimming in open water, and much else.

Seven superb stories, from the world's no. one storyteller. Meet the boy who can talk to animals and the man who can see with his eyes closed. And find out about the treasure buried deep underground. A cleaver mix of fact and fiction, this collection also includes how master storyteller Roald Dahl became a writer. With Roald Dahl, you can never be sure where reality ends and fantasy begins.

No one captures the comical absurdity of teenage angst better than #1 New York Times best-selling author Louise Rennison. Her tales featuring the self-obsessed yet irresistibly lovable Georgia Nicholson are an international sensation and have been called Bridget Jones's Diary for teens.

Justice served with extra chocolate sauce.

OMG! My Best Friend’s Hot Dad has His Whole Hand In My Tight Pink Hole! My doctor and I share a little secret… When I need a physical exam in a hurry for my summer job on break from college, my best friend’s dad volunteers. Good thing he’s a doctor. Of course he has other ideas… and so do I. He has wanted his way with me for a while now… and I’ve been dreaming about my best friend’s handsome dad… an experienced older man… taking me hard, rough and unprotected! The last thing I want is him pulling out… I want him to finish deep and inside! Maybe now we can both get what...

Braylen didn't even want to go to Lennon Pryor's epic graduation night party, but when Fynn begs her to be his "wingwoman," she can't deny him. Talking up her BFF—how he's magic behind a camera, with a killer sense of humor, and eyelashes that frame the most gorgeous blue eyes in the history of forever—is easy. Supporting his efforts to woo someone so completely wrong for him? Not so much. Fynn knows that grad night is his last shot before leaving for college to find true love. And thanks to Bray, he gets his chance with the beautiful Katy Evans.