Charlie and Tommy have big plans for Halloween. They hope to get out of taking their little sisters around and go trick-or-treating in Alex's upscale neighborhood instead. There they'll get tons more candy, they'll be on their own, and afterwards they'll get to attend the sleepover at Alex's house. But when Charlie finds out that the entertainment at the party is to consist of the Scariest Horror Movies Ever, he is struck by panic.

Charlie, Tommy, and Hector have high hopes for their soccer team this season until they find out that their new coach isn't all that interested in the fantabulous plays the three friends have worked out together.

When Charlie exaggerates about his dad's career and convinces his classmates that his dad would be the greatest Career Week speaker ever, what will happen if his dad actually does come and his friends find out the truth? When his classmates are boasting about their parents' jobs, Charlie gets carried away and leaves the impression that his accountant dad is not only the president of his company but also that he will hand out free calculators to everyone. With rumors flying around the school and expectations escalating, Charlie jumps the gun and tells his teacher Mrs. Burke that his dad can speak to their class during Career Week.

Charlie Bumpers has his heart set on playing the role of the evil Sorcerer in the fourth grade play. He's even got the laugh down pat: Mwa-ha-ha-ha! But his dreams of villainous stardom go up in smoke when he finds out that Mrs. Burke has cast him as the Nice Gnome! Determined to rectify this terrible injustice, Charlie concocts one plan after another, but nothing seems to work. To make matters worse, his dad has assigned chores to all the kids in the family and Charlie's job is walking Ginger, the diggiest, sniffiest, and poopiest dog in the universe.

Shortly before school starts, Charlie Bumpers learns that he will have the strictest teacher in the whole school for fourth grade. It doesn't matter that she's been named Teacher of the Year. He's still afraid of her. Last year when he was horsing around in the hall, he accidentally hit her in the head with his sneaker (don't ask). How will he survive a year under a teacher who is just waiting for him to make another stupid mistake?

In this collection, Harley, one of today's most prolific and celebrated kid's performers, explores the troublesome and troublemaking times in our life (particularly between 4th grade and middle school). Hear him sing with his trademark hilarity "In the Back of the Bus" and perform "Bottlecaps" (about the confiscation of his world-class bottlecap collection) and "Mr. Anderson," who was Indiana State Bus Driver of the Year (an honor brought upon mostly because he had eyes in the back of his head).

The Teachers' Lounge is Bill Harley's newest spoken word recording: a collection of hilarious and dead-on observations about life in elementary school. On this latest recording, two richly detailed and plotted stories of his school experiences ("The Teachers' Lounge" and "The Science Fair") are coupled with three poems.

A Grammy-nominated recording artist, Bill Harley - songwriter, storyteller, author, playwright - is known as one of the finest family performers in the United States. His unique combination of song and story, silly and serious, has entertained families for 20 years, and led him to be called "the Mark Twain of contemporary children's music" by Entertainment Weekly.

If you were big and ugly, had a ton of sharp teeth, and a truly enormous appetite, you wouldn't need the "magic word" either! These stories for kids, from acclaimed storytelling songster Bill Harley, center around the theme of being small.

Here it is! The recording fans have been asking for! A recording that contains the hilarious and completely captivating tale of Dirty Joe, a pirate who steals socks, and his equally odious sister, Stinky Annie, who steals underwear.

Why won't Sam Krupnik allow his mother to enter his bedroom? Why has he started calling his toy box The Lab? And why does he carry a Ziplock bag in his pocket at all times? Well, his mother's birthday is approaching, and she has told her family that what she really wants are homemade gifts. Sam has decided to invent a special, surprise perfume just for her - a concoction that will combine all of her favorite smells.

A fifth grade class, repelled by the overweight new student who has serious home problems, finally learns to accept her.

By sixth grade, Miranda and her best friend, Sal, know how to navigate their New York City neighborhood. They know where it's safe to go, like the local grocery store, and they know whom to avoid, like the crazy guy on the corner.

But things start to unravel. Sal gets punched by a new kid for what seems like no reason, and he shuts Miranda out of his life. The apartment key that Miranda's mom keeps hidden for emergencies is stolen. And then Miranda finds a mysterious note.

Though he thinks of himself as a cowboy, Tommy is really a bully. He's always playing cruel jokes on classmates or stealing from the store. But Tommy has a reason: life at home is tough. His abusive mother isn't well; in fact, she may be mentally ill, and his sister, Mary Lou, is in the hospital badly burned from doing a chore it was really Tommy's turn to do. To make amends, Tommy takes over Mary Lou's paper route.

Carley uses humor and street smarts to keep her emotional walls high and thick. But the day she becomes a foster child and moves in with the Murphys, she's blindsided. This loving, bustling family shows Carley the stable family life she never thought existed, and she feels like an alien in their cookie-cutter-perfect household.

Funny Business is based around the theme of - what else? - humor, and if you’re familiar with Jon and the Guys Read Library, you already know what you’re in store for: 10 hilarious stories from some of the funniest writers around. Before you’re through, you’ll meet a teenage mummy; a kid desperate to take a dip in the world’s largest pool of chocolate milk; a homicidal turkey; parents who hand over their son’s room to a biker; and more.

Amanda is reliving her 11th birthday over and over again - even the fight with her best friend, Leo. How can she fix everything and put the day behind her? Only time, friendship, and luck will tell.

Albie has never been the smartest kid in his class. He has never been the tallest. Or the best at gym. Or the greatest artist. Or the most musical. In fact, Albie has a long list of the things he's not very good at. And his parents keep reminding him of those things all the time...even when it's just by accident. But then Albie gets a new babysitter, Calista, who helps him figure out all of the things he is good at and how he can take pride in himself.

When you're the third of six kids, it's easy to get lost in the shuffle, but Sunday Fowler is determined that this summer she'll find the one thing that makes her stand out from her siblings. And when she discovers a silver box in the basement of the library her parents are renovating, she might just have found something to gain her the attention she so craves. Inside is a series of letters addressed to "The Librarian" and a manuscript. But who wrote them?

When her best friend and neighbor Margaret comes to her with a problem, Clementine goes to many lengths to help her friend. This sets off a rollicking adventure-filled week that finds Clementine getting into and out of further trouble, while learning valuable life lessons.

While looking out the window with her grandma's binoculars, Sammy witnesses a crime across the street at the Heavenly Hotel. What's worse, the thief saw her spying! As Sammy attempts to find the burglar who has made several other hits in the neighborhood, she finds herself trying to keep him from uncovering her - or worse, the police discovering that she's living illegally with her grandmother in the seniors-only housing!

In Emmy Laybourne’s action-packed debut novel, six high school kids (some popular, some not), two eighth graders (one a tech genius), and six little kids trapped together in a chain superstore build a refuge for themselves inside. While outside, a series of escalating disasters, beginning with a monster hailstorm and ending with a chemical weapons spill, seems to be tearing the world - as they know it - apart.

The book club is about to get a makeover. Even if Megan would rather be at the mall, Cassidy is late for hockey practice, Emma's already read every book in existence, and Jess is missing her mother too much to care, the new book club is scheduled to meet every month. But what begins as a mom-imposed ritual of reading Little Women soon helps four unlikely friends navigate the drama of middle school.

When Tom's big brother decides to become an Evil Scientist, his first experiment involves dunking Frankie the goldfish into toxic green gunk. Tom knows that there is only one thing to do: Zap the fish with a battery and bring him back to life! But there's something weird about the new Frankie. He's now a Big Fat Zombie Goldfish with hypnotic powers... and he's out for revenge!

When Ari's mother died four years ago, she had two final wishes: that Ari and her older brother, Gage, would stay together always, and that Ari would go to Carter, the middle school for gifted students. So when eighteen-year-old Gage decided he could no longer live with their bossy guardian, Janna, Ari knew she had to go with him - even though she'd miss baking cookies with Janna and curling up to watch HGTV. What Ari didn't realize was that Gage didn't have an apartment yet.

The first day of middle school means trading in freeze tag at the pool for new schedules, fabulous outfits, and a fresh start. But for 11-year-old Kaylan, the chaos of new locker combinations, cafeteria cliques, and potential first kisses is more than she can handle. She dreads the start of sixth grade and feels like she wants - no, needs - a winning game plan. Luckily, Kaylan and her effortlessly chill BFF, Arianna, have a fool-proof plan for tackling transitions: a list of 11 things they need to do to totally transform themselves before they both turn 12 in November.

Competitive eating vies with family expectations in a funny, heartfelt novel for middle-grade audiences by National Book Award winner Pete Hautman.

Last week I cut my hair, bought some boys' clothes and shoes, wrapped a large ACE bandage around my chest to flatten my fortunately-not-large breasts, and began looking for a new name. Angela Katz-McNair has never felt quite right as a girl. Her whole life is leading up to the day she decides to become Grady, a guy. While coming out as transgendered feels right to Grady, he isn't prepared for the reaction he gets from everyone else.

As befits a future President of the United States of America, Maggie Mayfield has decided to write a memoir of the past year of her life. And what a banner year it's been! During this period she's Student of the Month on a regular basis, an official shareholder of Coca-Cola stock, and defending Science Fair champion. Most importantly, though, this is the year Maggie has to pull up her bootstraps (the family motto) and finally learn why her cool-dude dad is in a wheelchair, no matter how scary that is.

As 14-year-old Christy leaves her family's Wisconsin farm to spend the summer at her wealthy aunt and uncle's home in Newport Beach, she hopes this will be the best summer of her life. When she meets surfer Todd with his screaming silver blue eyes, she's certain it will be. But when the summer doesn't unfold as Christy had hoped, she wonders if she'll keep her promise to her parents not to do anything she'll regret. Will she do anything to get Todd's attention, to be accepted, to force her summer to give her everything it promised?